Emma stood from the table, taking their empty bowls to the sink. "I don't suppose anybody would care if we didn't wash these…" she supposed, turning back towards Julian. A slow smile curved the corner of her mouth as she watched Julian watch her. "We have more important things to do, after all."

Julian cocked his head, grinning back at Emma as though they shared a secret. "What might that be?" he teased.

"I can think of a few things."

Julian stood and sauntered towards Emma as her stomach quivered in apprehension, a host of butterflies swarming the depths of her soul. Coming to rest behind her Julian brushed the damp hair from Emma's shoulder, causing her to grip the edge of the counter as her eyelids fluttered shut. At the first brush of lips upon her neck Emma sucked in a breath, letting her head fall lightly onto Julian's chest as his lips wandered towards the shell of her ear. She groaned his name, turning her head so that their lips met.

Emma wanted to savor every second of this, each breath that found them together, every press of his lips against hers. She had wanted to kiss those lips for years and it made her head swim to realize he had wanted her too. Now they were here together and for all they knew, this would be their last chance. But she wouldn't think of that now, not when they shared breath, their bodies separated by mere layers of fabric. Emma let Julian turn her around as he pressed her more firmly against the counter, the press of his groin giving him away. Emma groaned as she deepened the kiss, wanting to engulf him until they could never again be parted. It was futile but she persisted.

They were together tonight, and if the future wasn't promised, at least they could have this.

"Bedroom," Emma breathed between kisses, pushing Julian gently away from her. He permitted the distance but pulled her back against him a moment later as they stumbled from the kitchen and blindly down the halls. This house was foreign and each crash against furniture was rewarded in soft chuckles from Emma and curses from Julian which inspired more honest laugher from her. By the time they reached the bedroom, Emma could hardly kiss for laughter and Julian glared playfully, swearing she'd better have some damn good iratzes for her later.

"Runes won't even cross your mind by the time I'm done with you" was her only promise.

Julian was suddenly nervous as he laid Emma onto the bed, her smooth, toned legs drawing up around him as he slid over her. Their previous encounters had been so urgent, so crazed that there wasn't a second for him to think about any of this. Now here they were, and Julian could do nothing but think... about her lips, red and wet from his kisses; about her breasts, pressed between them; about her flat stomach beneath his hand; about… all of her. His inexperience left him trembling, thoughts swirling in his head until he almost wished he had practiced on other girls. He'd never had any desire to, but now his gut wrenched, wanting to be good for her, to make her feel good the way she could do for him.

Emma must have felt his apprehension because she braced herself on her elbows, looking more squarely at Julian. "What is it?"

Julian shook his head but his mouth betrayed him. "There's just a lot I… haven't done."

Emma laughed and drew his lips against hers, her kiss slow on soft. "We can level the playing field a bit," she said as they pulled apart. "There's something I've never done; I mean… something nobody's ever done to me. I have no expectations whatsoever."

Julian looked surprised. "You mean, nobody's ever…" He couldn't find it in him to use the words. "You know."

Emma shook her head.

"Why?" Julian asked, looking puzzled. "But you've clearly… given head," he spat out, blushing wildly at the words. Emma only laughed again, kissing him.

"Yeah, I've given head," she said mockingly, falling back onto the pillow. "I don't know. Clary says I need to date better guys, the ones I've… slept with… aren't big on the whole reciprocation thing."

"You guys talk about sex?" Julian asked, somewhat puzzled. Emma was his only real friend and sex wasn't exactly at the top of their conversation list.

"Well yeah, what else are we supposed to talk about?"

"I don't know. War, training, the Cold Peace. Stuff like that."

Emma laughed and pulled Julian more fully onto her, kissing him lightly, nipping at his lip. He groaned and deepened the kiss, his hand lingering at the soft cotton hem of her borrowed shirt. Emma arched her back off the bed in invitation and the shirt was pulled over her head and thrown carelessly to the floor.

She was so ceaselessly beautiful, every inch of her from her angular collarbone to her small, part breasts, all the way down to her toned stomach, her six pack giving Julian's a run for his money. He let his gaze linger, wanting to memorize her like this, splayed before him, so open and willing. He never thought he'd have her even once, yet she'd give him so much more than that if they could. He thought of the colors he's mix to paint her like this and burned every bit of her into his memory.

"You're staring," Emma chastised and was quickly silenced as Julian's head dipped to taste her skin, his lips and tongue laving at the hollow of her throat. She squirmed as his mouth mapped out her skin, a cartographer of flesh, noting each territory that made her back arch, her hips pressing up against his. She was intoxicating and he was lost in her poison, desperate for every soft moan that slipped past her lips. The further he worked down her body, the less restraint he had.

When his mouth fell to the flesh of her breast, Julian pointedly ignored her nipples, moving past them with a wicked grin at her objections as he licked at the skin just beneath, nipping at her flesh enough for Emma to fist a hand in the sheets, another grasping at his hair, trying to guide him to the abandoned peaks. Only when his nails grazed gently down her sides and Emma threw her head back against the pillows did he take her nipple into his mouth, earning a curse of delight from the golden warrior beneath him.

He smiled against her skin before sucking more diligently at her nipple, taking it between his teeth and flicking his tongue over the tip. "Shit," was Emma's only response. When his hand found her other breast, he swirled his finger around her already-peaked nipple, teasing. Her hips ground against his in earnest, her back arching far off the bed as she panted beneath him.

Once satisfied with this exploration, Julian moved lower, kissing his way down her stomach, searching for particularly sensitive spots. When his mouth found the silken flesh of her sides, Emma moaned loudly, squirming onto her side at the sensation. Julian growled and moved her onto her back again, his arm pinning her hips as he kissed up and down her sides, his own need growing more and more inflamed as she cried out at his ministrations.

When he reached the top of her black underwear, Emma was out of her mind with need, her throat dry from panting. She could feel the burning desire pooling between her thighs and wanted to force Julian down further as he stared up at her, licking his lips, tracing the lacy band between her hips. "Julian-" she rasped out, hoping he could see in her eyes how near insanity she was, how desperately she needed to be touched.

Truth be told, it wasn't entirely the fault of her boyfriends that they'd never done this. Sure, they'd never offered but she'd never asked either; it always seemed to intimate, too intimidating, and she had never felt quite comfortable with the idea. Now, though. Now she wanted it. Needed it. In this moment, she wasn't sure she'd survive if he didn't put his mouth on her now. She was burning, half-wild with need and she wanted to fall all the way into the desperation that awaited, to give him this piece of her she'd offered nobody else. Yet Julian was staring at her, his eyes lidded as he watched her watching him, his hands still skimming her sides as she writhed under his touch.

As if he couldn't take it anymore, Julian pulled the last remaining scrap of fabric off in a single move, sitting up to pull them over her feet, tossed without a thought onto the floor. The witchlight glowed dimly on the bedside table as Emma sought out Julian's eyes as they raked up her body from toe to head, then settled back at the apex of her thighs, his breath ragged in his chest as he sat back on his heels.

"More touching, less staring," Emma admonished breathlessly. She needed this, needed it like she didn't know she could need anything. She'd never felt such burning desire before, she'd never been worshipped so thoroughly, turned on to the point of pain as Julian had explored her from neck to hip. She must have begged because Julian was torn from his reverie, coming back to himself enough to grab Emma's calves, spreading her legs enough to climb up between them.

Emma swore time had stopped in those few seconds he took to kiss up her thighs, her legs bending involuntarily in reaction to such a tender touch. "Let me know if I'm doing this right," he said quietly, glancing up to Emma who nodded furiously. She thought she must be a sight, then, certainly she looked as crazed as she felt, the desire threatening to blaze from her as she burned under his gaze. And then his mouth was on her and - oh. Her hips bucked at the touch, iher back arching from the bed as she groaned. Holding down her hips, Julian mouthed the apex of her thighs tentatively, then let his tongue dip lower, sliding through her folds. At her taste, Julian let out a strangled groan and lost every shred of reservation as he worked at her more confidently, as though the taste of her need sparked something primal in him, some base instinct that rendered him in tune with her every move.

Emma couldn't think, couldn't speak, could only feel as Julian's tongue ran over her; she would have sworn he'd done this before if the sensations sweeping through her body were any indication, from the electricity in her toes and fingertips and every spot in between. This was the beginning and the end of her life, the point at which some stars collided, forming galaxies that shone behind her eyelids as she trembled on the bed, her thighs shaking almost too hard to hold still. When she thought she had found nirvana, she felt his fingers sliding over her folds and now she knew she was begging, pleading, swearing her allegiance if only he'd indulge her.

He readily obliged, sliding a finger inside and Emma couldn't contain the moan that spilled from her, a stream of curses not far behind. His tongue swirled circles along her clit and then he added a finger and Emma was gone, transported beyond her body and into the void as he fingers thrust into her again and again, his mouth never ceasing its endeavor as he brought her higher, higher, higher until suddenly the dam broke; Emma thought she might be screaming as specks of light danced behind her eyes and her hand tangled desperately in Julian's dark brown curls as she shattered, her hips undulating beneath him as wave after wave of pleasure washed through her until she knew her soul was cleansed, purged of everything except for Julian and her, his fingers still working as he brought her back down, down, down.

Suddenly it was too much and Emma gasped Julian's name, drawing him back up to her where she trembled and shook in his arms, his lips finding hers as she came back down to the earth, every worry left behind.

"Julian," Emma rasped, her jaw quivering against his lips, her body more pliant than he'd ever known her to be. "Oh my god. Julian."

He chuckled, pride and pleasure mixing to create a certain euphoria, untouched by any shadow of doubt. She said his name once or ten times more between kisses as her body still trembled, the taste of her shared between their mouths.

"Give me a minute," she said softly, pressing her forehead briefly against his. Julian nodded, kissing her cheeks and her forehead and her nose, her shoulder, her collarbone, anything he could reach from his spot in her arms.

"So was that okay?" he asked when her body balanced, some sexual homeostasis finding her. He tried to disguise the trepidation in his voice, though from her response he supposed she couldn't have many complaints.

"Okay?" Emma asked incredulously. "Oh my god, Julian. Where- how- oh my god. Shit."

She sought out his lips, prying them open with her tongue to taste herself on his and Julian thought it was the most erotic, delicious thing she could have done. He didn't hold back as he kissed her, their tongues pressing against each other, a dance in its own right.

"Another confession," Emma said between kisses, pulling away enough to look Julian in the eye. "Nobody's ever… I mean, nobody's ever made me come before. I don't think I've ever made myself come like that, even. That was…"

She didn't continue, opting instead to find Julian's lips again. She braced her hands on his chest, pushing him over as she climbed into his lap, kissing him hard as they both sat upright, clawing at each other. "You really do need better boyfriends," Julian mused, his voice a hungry growl. He expected a glare from Emma but instead, she laughed, a carefree, euphoric thing that would have slain his heart if it didn't beat so steadily for her.

"Only you," she said, her hand coming to rest upon his heart. He didn't know if it was a statement or a promise but in this moment, he hardly cared. Emma was in his lap, naked and flushed, and nothing else in the world mattered, not war, not the Clave, not the parabatai curse, nor her impending exile. All that mattered was Emma; all that had ever mattered like this was Emma.

He found her lips again and drew her down against him as he laid back on the bed, his hands wrapped around her hips like the lock on a treasure chest. When Emma pulled back to speak Julian cut her off with another kiss as he pressed her hips onto him. She groaned, allowing herself to roll her hips over his as their kisses grew in intensity until the strict confines of Julian's jeans became too abrasive against his aching length.

Emma must have understood as he broke the kiss because she sat up to unbuckle his jeans, moving torturously slowly as if she knew how close the buckle and her hands were to her center. She was too much, too much and yet not enough in this moment; he needed her closer, needed her soul laid bare to him as her body was. Then Emma's hands were drawing down his zipper and peeling the clothes from his hips as his cock sprang free. She giggled, dipping her head down to lick teasingly up his length before sucking the precum from the tip, licking his lips as she pulled up again. Julian's eyes were glued to hers as she grinned and he could actually hear his heart's quickening tempo, a crescendo of emotion as his blood ran hot in his veins.

Before he could beg, Emma shucked the jeans from his legs and braced her hands on his muscular thighs as she again took him into her mouth, burying him as deep as she could into her throat as her tongue pressed firmly against his length. Julian groaned, thinking this entire night must be a dream; in fact, he swore he'd had this very same dream before, many times over perhaps over the course of many years. But this was real. Emma was here, in the flesh, his cock in her mouth like she couldn't resist the sight of him without some level of contact. Julian realized she must like giving head and he tried not to think of Cameron Ashdown, or even worse, his brother if they had-

No. He forcefully pushed the thought from his head as he looked down at Emma, her eyelids fluttering as her mouth rose and fell over him, soft moans rumbling against him. He growled her name and pulled her onto him, finding her lips as her hips sank down over him, the incredible heat of her core pressing onto him. The kiss was slow and heady, full of hitched breaths and gentle laughter as they touched and explored and played together. It was only when Emma raised herself suddenly that Julian thought of anything more than the delight that was this Shadowhunter.

Then, she was positioning his cock under her and sinking down slowly, so slowly and every thought fell from Julian's mind until nothing was left but Emma.

Emma, who he'd loved all his life; who he'd fought beside; who he'd die for. Emma who raised the children beside him, who'd held him together when he thought he might fray at the ends, who'd provided companionship and friendship and comfort over so many desolate years. Emma who'd be exiled far away from all she'd known for some unknown amount of time, losing some gifts, some magic, the core of all she was. For him. For them. For the hope of breaking their parabatai bond, shattering the curse that promised to kill them and all they loved. And Emma would take that sentence because she was strong and fierce and loyal, because Julian couldn't leave the kids, because she had hope that they would have a future, no matter how much she feared they wouldn't.

When she started to move on him, Julian snapped back to the present, finding her eyes intently on him. Her face was ravaged with emotion and Julian thought she must be thinking along the same lines as him, feeling the immensity of this moment, her soul bared to him as he'd hoped it would be, just as he expected his was to her. Beyond that though, her face was overcome with pleasure as her lips parted, her eyebrows furrowing. When she rose and fell on him again, Julian met her with a thrust of his hips and Emma moaned, her eyelids fluttering shut as her body fell faster and faster onto his, her need a tangible thing that Julian met with hunger of his own as they moved together, the blue witchlight playing along their skin like a prayer.

Julian was thankful for raunchy internet searches as his thumb came to rest at the apex of Emma's thighs, rubbing soft circles that pulled more desperate sounds from her as she rode him more desperately, more deliberately. He could feel her walls tightening against him as she pleaded for more, faster, harder, please until the only sounds in the room were the slap of skin against skin and Emma's shaking breath as she came, gasping and digging her nails into Julian's chest, her jaw quivering under the sensation.

It took everything in Julian's power to not follow behind her and instead let her ride out the dizzying waves of pleasure as she rocked her hips against his, her hips trembling through the bliss. When she finally opened her eyes to Julian, he saw straight to her soul and kissed her quickly to erase the fear and heartache he saw in her. His heart fractured at the sight and he willed it away and he moved to put her beneath him, as though he could shield her from all the awaited outside the walls of this manor. For now, they were here.

"It's going to be okay," Julian promised, hoping it wouldn't end up a well-meaning lie. He brushed a stray blonde lock behind her ear as he kissed her again, throwing his heart into it as if to say I would do anything, anything, to save you from this. I will carry this burden to ease some of the weight. Let me. What he did say was merely "I love you. Emma, by the Angel, it's only ever been you for me. I'd sell my soul to the Seelie queen if we could have this every day."

"Anyone but her," Emma said, eyes wide in mock horror. Julian grinned, tracing the smile on her lips with his thumb. Emma lurched forward and bit it before he had a chance to move it away, holding it between her teeth as the tip of her tongue flicked over the calloused finger. Then she wrapped her mouth around his thumb and sucked, her tongue mimicking the movements on his cock as Julian groaned, his eyes heavy-lidded but glued to her mouth.

He was glad he was still sheathed inside of her as he pulled himself out before absolutely slamming back into her, her mouth falling open as he stole back his thumb. His thumb – now wet from her mouth's attention – found her peaked nipple as he rolled it between his fingers and Emma gasped, her hips pushing back against his. Julian grinned as he pulled out again, delighting at Emma's whimper as he teased her, dipping only just into her wet center before withdrawing himself once more. Again and again as he kissed her breasts, biting and licking and tasting until Emma's need bordered on fury and her nails dug into his ass, pleading with him to just fuck her before she lost her mind.

Julian obliged as though he himself wasn't already nearly drunk with lust as Emma writhed beneath him, arching and pleading and absolutely responsive to his playful torture. The moan escaping her lips when he plunged fully into her was unlike anything he'd torn from her yet, heavy and primal and dripping with need. They moved together so seamlessly that one might suspect they'd done this together for a lifetime instead of merely thrice and Julian delighted in it, at how good they were together, as synchronized in bed as they were while fighting, as if they were meant to do those two things side by side forever; it was as if the Angel had appointed them to each other, to have and to hold, until death did them part.

God, he wanted that. He wanted her. Them. A lifetime of this synchronicity.

When Emma came around him this time, a chorus of professions of love tumbling from her lips, Julian didn't hold back as he buried his head against her sweat-slicked neck and followed her into the place souls are bred and born and chosen. He knew with utter certainty that in any life, in any form, he'd choose her.

Her heartbeat was loud in her ears as her body came back to earth, the weight of Julian atop her the only thing keeping her from drifting out through the atmosphere entirely. He was her anchor and the thrum of his own heartbeat inside of her core drew a satisfied moan from deep within her chest. They laid together, panting through the residual moans and tremors until their labored breathing calmed and silence once again surrounded them.

Emma could feel her heart so physically that she could have sworn she could have simply touched it, the swollen, aching, smiling organ that was full of only one word: Julian. The muscles of his back flexed beneath her hands as he shifted to one side, his weight on one elbow as he looked down at Emma. She knew she had tears running down her cheeks when Julian bent to kiss them, though she didn't know when she'd started. To say she was sad would be like considering the ocean merely water. She wasn't only sad, she was sated and yet hungry and happy too. She was so much all at once and if not for Julian's hand over her heart, she thought she might explode from the enormity of it all.

"Julian," she whispered, her voice sounding raw. She wondered how loud she'd been if her voice was any indication and she felt herself flush slightly at the thought. She'd never felt anything like that before, like sex was merely the pathway to that indescribable union of souls binding. By the look in his ocean-blue eyes, he felt it too. He laid his forehead against hers and Emma touched their lips together, sticky and dry from the panting wretched from them mere moments before. When Julian's arm began to shake at the weight of himself, he collapsed to the bed, pulling Emma against him, her head tucked under his chin.

Safe. She felt safe with him, now and always. "You are… really good at that."

Julian laughed, a full-bodied thing that shook her against his chest until she was laughing too. When they calmed, Emma looked up into his seemingly-endless eyes and loved the way happiness transformed him. He was always so serious, so responsible and unyielding with that terrifyingly ruthless edge that promised he would exact revenge on anyone who dared cross the ones he loved. Like this, she could forget it all, forget the fact that they had survived a war that left them parentless, forced to be the parents of four children at twelve years old. She could forget that they were on the cusp of another war. She could forget that they were warriors at all, with duties to protect the mundane world at all costs, to protect each other with their lives. She could forget any heartaches that awaited. Like this, they could be two people devastatingly in love, wrapped together in that love as though nothing else mattered. For tonight.

"I will miss you every second," Julian swore, ripping Emma from her silent reverie. "Every breath. I'll wait for you forever whether I die alone or with you by my side."

"What if it doesn't work?" Emma whispered, voicing her innermost fears. "What if the bond doesn't break?"

"Then we will find another way."

They slept off and on that night, waking when hands crept over their sleeping forms, rousing each other to touch and feel and savor every last hour together. Emma didn't know how many times they'd made love, but when she awoke to sunlight illuminating the mountains beyond the window, warning of responsibilities and commitments, Emma roused Julian once more. This time, they fucked hard and desperately, as though this really might be the last time. She is inside of him as much as he is in her; with each press of his hips, Emma falls down, down, down, burrowing beneath his ribs until their heartbeats pulse as one.

Though they had done little but fuck all night, this time felt like the first and the last and Emma was quietly sobbing as it ended, her shoulders shaking furiously against Julian's chest. He held her, whispering promises and convictions until her shaking stilled and they laid together, skin on skin and souls intertwined. Always the protector; always the one to piece everyone back together. Emma felt almost guilty for making him take up that role again with her but she was grateful all the same.

They must have drifted off again because the next thing they knew, they woke to a clap of thunder. No, not thunder, the skies were clear and sunny. "What-?"

Julian's groan cut her off as he pulled the blankets up over Emma just in time to see a familiar face appear in the doorway. Emma groaned to then at the sight of Magnus Bane, standing against the doorframe, his arms crossed over his chest. He looked amused and tired.

"We've really got to stop meeting like this," Magnus mused, his glance flitting back and forth between Emma's and Julian's. Neither of them spoke.

"I understand," Magnus said slowly, "and I don't care. However, Robert Lightwood was looking for you. I covered for you both and he doesn't suspect a thing but he needs you in his office to smooth out the details of Emma's exile."

He looked genuinely sad as he considered, his head shaking slowly as he ran his hand through his hair. "I will do as much as I can for both of you during the exile. I am at your disposal. Now, get clothes on and stop making bedroom eyes at each other. I'll wait for you in the foyer to portal you to Robert."

When he was gone, Emma sank back against Julian, letting him hold her in his crushing grasp for just a moment longer. They dressed silently, avoiding each other's eyes as the pulse of love beat between them. At the threshold of the room, they finally looked at each other.

"I'm glad we had last night," Julian said earnestly. "Even if it makes me miss you that much more."

Emma smiled, though it didn't quite meet her eyes. "On the bright side, I'll have much to think about during lonely nights."

Julian sucked a breath through his teeth, his eyes closing at her implication. "That image will keep me up for the next decade."

Emma laughed, pulling Julian against her. She didn't know what the Inquisitor would say; she didn't know where she'd go or for how long. The only thing she knew with utter certainty was that her heart was Julian's and maybe someday they could be together without threat. Julian's kiss told her the same, and when their whispers of love echoed between them, Magnus shouted from the kitchen, breaking them from this dream.

"Sometime today would be ideal!"

With a final sad grin, Emma grabbed Julian's hand as they headed towards their future.