THAT AWKWARD MOMENT

AN: Enjoy the fact Waige is a real thing now. Enjoy this story. Enjoy a laugh at Walter and Paige's expense. And please remember, authors enjoy reviews. ;-D

OXOXOXOXOXO

No question about it.

Life is stupid sometimes.

One minute you're a cheerleader at the top of the pyramid dating a baseball player. The next, you're a pregnant college drop-out. Then you're a seriously broke single mother of a learning disabled child, struggling just to provide basic necessities. And in the space of a few hours, you find out your child is actually a genius. And you become an action hero and a valuable asset in a strange and exciting new kind of company full of geniuses headed up by the hottest and rudest weirdo you've ever met. Then you wake up one day and you're fired from the same company. Then a few short weeks after that, you find yourself in a closet mauling and being mauled by your boss who just reinstated you. One second you're ass over ears in love and heading to a cushy job in Tahiti, the next you crash land on a hellhole of an island where you are stranded for three and a half weeks with no privacy let alone an adequate supply of toilet paper. Then the stars align again and you're back to civilization.

Ahhhh. You spend your first half hour home in a hot shower, including the time it takes you to deep condition your hair because it's as brittle as last summer's haystack from the salt water. You spend another twenty minutes working on your hopeless manicure and another forty on shaving, plucking, tweezing and other hair removal, because there are unmentionable places where you were beginning to resemble a Sasquatch.

You put on your favorite black mini skirt; the one you know makes him stare at your legs, over the only good pair of racy and lacy underpants you still own that you found hiding in the back of your underwear drawer. Because in anticipation of Tahiti, all the others were hastily stuffed in a suitcase that burst open on impact scattering all your sexy unmentionables across a stretch of beach for everyone on the team to admire. At least it wasn't an elf costume.

Then you line up a place for your son to stay and… Presto! You're finally ready for the magical night you've been anticipating with the man of your dreams.

And it exceeds your expectations in every way. Of course, after three long years of waiting, you might have been so 'pent up' he could have strolled by and blown a kiss at your lady parts and you would have gone off like a skyrocket on the Fourth of July. But let's just say the reality was much better than the years of nerd-love fantasies. He put you into orbit multiple times. Which was rather poetic since he'd literally been in orbit when he'd confessed his feelings to you the first time.

And then…

OXOXOXOXOXO

Waking up in the loft next to her genius boyfriend was an eye opening experience for Paige in more ways than one.

She was disoriented at first in the unfamiliar surroundings, but was soon thrilled to realize she was in a bed with real sheets and pillows. Paige didn't miss the nights spent propped up in stiff, creaking airline seats with sand gritting uncomfortably in every imaginable place. But she did oddly miss the soothing sound of the waves.

She soon became distracted by the sight of Walter beside her, his obscenely long eyelashes fanning out softly beneath his closed eyes. His sexy, full lower lip was made fuller by her kisses and playful nips. Paige rarely got to see him so relaxed, but she had worn him out pretty thoroughly the previous night. And he appeared to be sleeping soundly, facing her with one arm still draped around her middle as if afraid she might escape while he slept.

Of course it was completely unfair. There he was sprawled out next to her looking every bit as delicious as he had the night before. Not even seriously rumpled. Well, if she chose to overlook the scratches. She might have left a couple on his bare back. And the love bites. What the hell? Had she really left a hickey on the underside of his chin? She had always been a sucker for that cleft. It appeared she had made that fact a literal truth. And that thought sounded like the mini Walter who lived in her head. When the point really was that the man was as sickeningly gorgeous as he was before she took him to bed. And he took her to nirvana. Several times.

And the really disturbing notion was Paige knew she looked and probably smelled like a troll. And not the cute, carnival prize kind. The kind that hides under bridges and eats you if you try to cross. The kind that would frighten small children and make the bravest of men keep their distance. Even geniuses with no sense of self-preservation.

Some serious repairs needed to be made before Walter woke up. If he saw her in her current condition, 'my flower' wouldn't be the first thing he would think to call her. Paige felt more like a fart blossom which was only one small step down from the corpse flower he rhapsodized so much about.

She extricated herself slowly and carefully from his embrace. It took some time. He was a sort of like a Chinese finger trap. The more she tried to ease away, the more he tightened his grip mumbling something about his 'little strange attractor'. She didn't even want to think about what that one meant. Just as she was finally able to slip out from under his arm, one of his legs would twine around hers. And when she would slide her leg free, his arm would come back around her to pull her close again. At least she didn't need to do her usual morning yoga routine after the way she had to bend to get out from under Walter.

Grabbing his blue button down shirt off the floor and slipping it on, Paige padded quietly toward the bathroom. Luckily she'd had the foresight to put her things there when she'd been sneaking upstairs to knock Walter's socks off. And eventually his pants too.

While Paige took her time making herself feel beautiful once again, she thought back over every erotic detail of the previous evening. In the past, she'd always been a bit of a sexual camel; able to go weeks or months and even sometimes years from oasis to oasis. But the memories of the night before stirred her up all over again until she felt nearly as wound up as she had on the island. Oh, what that man did to her! She wanted Walter for her breakfast in bed. Smirking at her reflection in the mirror, she decided it was high time to wake up Wally and his Wondrous Willy. And she knew just how to do it.

Paige's hair was damp from the quick shower she took, so she finger-combed and scrunched it until it looked perfectly tousled. She wrapped a towel loosely around her frame making sure to expose a generous amount of cleavage.

Stepping with stealth into sitting area, she first noticed Walter was perched on the coffee table with his back to her. He'd pulled on an undershirt and boxers, but that was okay. They were easily removed. One corner of her mouth kicked up in anticipation.

Then she saw he had his computer on his lap. Working?

Oh, HELL no! Not on her watch.

Slinking up behind him, she purred, "Any work we do today won't require a computer, mister. I just left the shower and I'm all wet and ready for yo…"

It took a minute before she recognized he was on a Skype call.

With his parents.

On the screen, she could see Louise's mouth drop open and she heard Sean say, "Nice one, boy-o. Now I see exactly why you didn't have the time to let your mother know you aren't dead…" Walter instantly slapped his laptop closed.

Well, poop.