AN: Oh, FREE! – Stop teasing with the MakoHaru feels! Especially with these new Timeless Medley movies... Random text convo sparked this idea years ago as this story has been collecting dust in my files but not anymore!

Summary: The Tachibana tools of authority. Haruka didn't like them one bit.

Mrs. Tachibana's Kitchen Authority

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Authority Number One: Wooden Spoon

Tongues clashed as teeth pulled. Exploring one another, sucking, moaning, as heavy pants filled the room. Large warm callous hands gripped on a lean muscular waist, trying to pull their bodies closer if possible.

"M-M-Makoto…!" A breathy moan escapes breathless lips.

Green eyes swirling with desire focus on a flushed face. "Haru…" he whispers as he licks down a long creamy neck and bites down, sucking on the reddened skin.

Haru closes his eyes as he tries not to moan too loudly. They were in Mokoto's room after all. If this were his place, things would have gone differently. As Makoto's hands reached underneath to take off Haru's shirt, tiny feet were heard scattering away from the room's door.

Makoto sighed as his head fell, resting on Haru's shoulder.

"Mom! Onii-chan and Haru-nii-chan are making out again!" Ren, Makoto's little brother yells.

"Mom! Don't listen to Ren!" Ran, Makoto's little sister yells down the hall, trying to cover for her big brother. "He's stupid!" She adds, yelling the loudest as she smacks Ren's arm.

Ren stops walking as he jumps up and down, stomping as small hands form into tiny fists, "Am not! Am not! Am not!" he cries, "You're the stupid one, Stupid!" he sticks out his tongue.

Ran sticks out her own tongue and crosses her arms over her chest, "Nu-uh, you're stupid times infinity!"

Ren grits his teeth as he shakes his head, "No, I'm not!" he yells, pushing Ran away as the tears come flowing down. "MOM! RAN USED INFINITY!" He yells, choking on a sob.

Ran smirks as she walks away, passing Ren, "Cry baby"

The twins continue fighting down the hall as they race and try to see who finds their mother first. In the room, the mood was ruined as Makoto shakes his head against Haru's shoulder, "Let's just give up and play video games. Sorry, Haru-chan…" Makoto was so crushed. With the swimming club, training for said swimming club, after school club meetings, classroom cleaning duties, and exams right around the corner – they rarely had a chance to be really together.

"One more" Haru says. Plain and simple.

Makoto smiled. He loved it whenever Haru would ask for more – it reminded him so much of when they first started dating – he was the one to always ask Haru, shy and unsure of himself, afraid of sounding needy and being a pest to his best friend/boyfriend.

Haru feels Makoto's lips on his collarbone as they lightly nibbled, trailing up his neck and jawline, finally capturing his lips. Haru moans, deep and throaty, not being able to contain it as the kiss turns heated once more.

In its intensity, they didn't hear Makoto's door open as Mrs. Tachibana cleared her throat, leaning against the door as she crossed her arms with a wooden spoon in hand.

"Boys" She calls when they didn't notice her presence, "Makoto and Haruka" she tries again, this time having her son pale in mortification as he quickly pulls away from Haru.

"M-M-Mom!" A flustered Makoto squeaks as he tries to hide himself by using Haru as a shield like always, embarrassed that his mom found them in an awkward position. Yet again.

Mrs. Tachibana stares at Haruka knowing all too well, the boy wasn't easily embarrassed as she watched him straddling Makoto on the bed. She was just glad she found them with shirts on… this time.

Pointing her wooden spoon directly at them, she used it to enforce her iron fist authority as she gently smiled, "Please be dears and play with the twins" patiently she waits for them to untangled themselves as she smiles brightly – Haru knowing that smile all too well. He would never admit it out loud, but it did creep him out.

Makoto quickly nodded.

Haru shivered in silent fear.

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Authority Number Two: Wooden Turkey Baster

Lying down on Makoto's bed, Haruka arches his back as he runs his fingers through Makoto's olive green hair moaning.

"Makoto…!" He cries in pleasure as Makoto grips the material covering his Haru tighter.

Makoto growls hungrily, lust filling him up as he roughly takes Haruka's shirt off, his own coming off in the process.

Haruka begins to grind against Makoto's clothed lower half, a loud groan escaping Makoto's lips, as small gasps escape two curious little children.

Leaving their little peephole of Makoto's slightly opened door, they hurriedly run off to find their mom.

"Mom! Onii-chan and Haru-nii-chan are being weird!" Ren yells down the hall.

Ran shoves Ren to get ahead, wanting to be the first to report to their mom, "Mom! They're not being weird!" she yells, correcting her little brother, "They're just doing weird things!" her big brother and Haru-nii-chan weren't weird they were just doing weird things. It was plain and simple like that!

Ren grits his teeth as he tries with all his strength to shove Ran back but to no avail. She just laughs at him as she reaches the kitchen first, finding their mom holding a turkey baster as she stuffed a turkey they were having for dinner that night.

Ren jumped up and down, stomping, balling his small hands into fists. "No fair! No fair!" he whines as Ran sticks her tongue out at him.

Mrs. Tachibana smiles warmly at her energetic twins, lovingly patting them on the head as she takes her turkey baster and makes her way to Makoto's room as she tells the twins to go play in the living room.

Once she reaches her son's room, she opens the door and finds Makoto slowly unzipping a shirtless Haruka's jeans. "Boys" she firmly calls when she sees Makoto reaching underneath Haruka's boxers.

Strange. Wasn't Haruka always wearing his swimming jammers? "Makoto and Haruka" She tries again, louder this time as it snaps her son from his spell.

"M-M-Mom!" He squeaks again, having nowhere to hide, he quickly jumps off his bed and puts his shirt back on.

Mrs. Tachibana stares at the ever passive Haruka, knowing the boy wasn't easily moved by trivial things. Pointing her turkey baster to Makoto she puts up her gentle smile, the one Haruka knew all too well.

"Please go play with the twins while I finish preparing dinner" She sweetly asks, titling her head, closing her eyes as Makoto aggressively nods and pulls Haru up from his bed.

Mrs. Tachibana leaves the room as Haru sits on Makoto's bed and sighs.

First a wooden spoon and now a turkey baster.

What's next?

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Authority Number Three: Wooden Soup Ladle

"I'm going to make you scream tonight"

Haruka blushed, whimpering, wanting this for such a long now.

A knocking stirred him from his sleep as Haru slowly opened blue eyes and figured it was his boyfriend.

Why did he even bother going to Makoto's place all the time anyway? It's not like they could get away with anything.

They were best friends and Haruka was practically family but he was slowly dying.

He would never admit it out loud as he mentally sighed.

He was miserable and sexually frustrated.

"Haru-chan, are you awake? My mom made us breakfast" Makoto called out through the silent house as he closed the backdoor behind him. Setting the food in the kitchen, he made his way to find his boyfriend.

He figured Haru was soaking in his tub as he knocked on the bathroom's door and found an empty still water tub. Tilting his head, Makoto decided to check in Haru's room as he lightly knocked and let himself in, finding his cute boyfriend still under the covers.

"I'm surprised you're still in bed, Haru-chan" He gently spoke, sitting down on the bed as he reached out and placed his warm big hand on what he thought might be Haru's shoulder.

He thought he was imagining things when he heard a slight whimper coming from beneath the wall of blanket that covered and hid his Haru.

Makoto frowned sensing something was wrong and he knew Haru was awake as he ran his fingers through his olive green hair sighing as he pulled the covers off a struggling Haru. He knew that Haru was being difficult and stubborn – not wanting anyone, especially Makoto to see him this way.

It was pathetic, his needs, his wants, his desires – all pathetic.

Haru wanted one thing and one thing only – his boyfriend.

He wanted Makoto.

So, so badly at that.

Makoto's frown deepened when Haru didn't turn to look at him.

"Haru-chan, look at me" He begged as he watched Haru sit up and cross his arms.

Makoto knew he was annoyed, angry, and scowling. He could tell by Haru's rigid posture and tense muscles. Makoto sighed as he leaned over and slowly trailed kisses up Haru's bare shoulder blades.

Haru bit his bottom lip hard as he tried not to give in. He would not show submission, he would not show that he wanted this, desperately needed this – this alone time with Makoto. In the privacy of his own home, he knew they could do everything and anything they wanted without feeling invaded or in his terms – cockblocked.

"Haru-chan, please look at me!" Makoto begged as he slowly pulled away and lightly shook Haru's shoulder and begged in that cute little puppy dog way he always would, with his pouting lips and pleading green eyes. Makoto was trying to use the sweet approach before trying to be a little demanding. Makoto would never force Haru into doing anything, especially doing anything for his own sake that Haru didn't want to do.

Haru was fighting with himself mentally, his heart told him to give in but his brain was telling him not to lose his resolve. In the end, he ended up turning, listening to his heart instead of his brain as he quickly crushed his lips against Makoto's, the rapid speed just as fast as when he would take off his clothes, ready to jump into any body of water big enough to have him. Knocking the wind out of Makoto, his back hit the mattress as his head hit a pillow hard as a long moan escaped his lips.

"H-H-Haru-" Makoto moaned, the 'chan' lost in his swirling emotions.

Haru straddled him as he gripped tightly on the loose fabric of Makoto's shirt, feeling the hard muscles underneath.

Haru let out a strangled whimper as his lips attacked burning hot flesh, trying to desperately savor this alone time with Makoto. His hands start to roam as one hand falls lower and grips onto Makoto's belt.

Tugging on the belt, it slowly loosens as Haru starts to visibly see Makoto's green boxers. His lips pressed hard against Makoto's throat as he bites down. Makoto loudly groans as Haru gently licks the reddened skin. His hand slowly starts to slide under Makoto's boxers when he feels a buzzing coming from Makoto's jeans.

Haru deeply sighed, biting his bottom lip hard as Makoto frowned, apologizing with his eyes when he reaches for his cell phone and unlocks the screen to see a text message from his dad.

"Dad

1 New Message:

We need you to babysit the twins.

Be home in ten minutes or else I'll send the twins to come get you.

:)"

Makoto sighed as he read the message and shoved his phone back into his pocket. He knew whenever his parents would send out the twins to fetch him – they meant business. The twins were like bloodhounds. They were young, little, and so full of energy.

"I have to go babysit" Makoto spoke, his voice echoing in the silence. He felt bad for ruining the mood, he was just as frustrated as Haru was but sometimes – it just wasn't easy.

Haru didn't mean to, but he whimpered when he meant to scowl and act indifferent. Pushing off Makoto, he got up and offered him his hand, "I'll come too" he spoke dully as Makoto took his hand and got off. Makoto would make it up to Haru, he had to, somehow.

Entering Makoto's house – a warm and spicy scent wafted throughout the house as Makoto passed by the kitchen with Haru in tow – not embarrassed to hold his boyfriend's hand as they made their way into the kitchen to greet Mrs. Tachibana.

Mrs. Tachibana was stirring a pot as she eyed their hands but said nothing and smiled as she took the wooden soup ladle and a bowl. "You boys need to eat something" She said as she started to pour and fill two bowls with the soup she made. Makoto and Haru didn't object as their stomachs growled in sync as they took their bowls and sat together to eat.

"Remember, no kissing!" Mrs. Tachibana sternly told them with a subtle hint of teasing as she leaned over the counter that divided the kitchen from the dining room table as she pointed her wooden soup ladle in their direction.

Makoto's body stiffened as he blushed while Haru nearly choked on the hot soup. He was starting to get annoyed with all these restrictions they had at Makoto's place. No touching, no kissing, no locked or closed door.

Haru pretended to act indifferent to what Mrs. Tachibana said as Makoto nodded and promised he would behave himself for the night. Haru didn't think he had that kind of will power.

Haru hated limits.

Makoto's parents soon left and he was left all alone with a silently fuming Haru.

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Authority Number Four: Wooden Mortar and Pestle

It was a bright and sunny morning in the Tachibana house. Everyone was sitting around the dining room table as Mrs. Tachibana prepared breakfast for everyone as well as her children's bentos. Makoto was splitting his fish in half to give to his fighting little brother and sister when Mrs. Tachibana called his name, Makoto stopped what he was doing as the twins took their share of the fish off his plate happily.

"Yes, mom?"

"Makoto…" She started as she held a banana in her hands, "Have you and Haru-chan, you know…" She paused as she held up the banana higher than the counter to show him the banana.

Makoto titled his head not understanding. What does a banana even mean?

Sighing, Mrs. Tachibana grabbed another banana and held them close together as Makoto stared intently at her until it finally clicked in his head. Makoto's blood rose to his face as he blushed and turned into a bright tomato. Ears tingling and throat dry, he squeaked when he tried to speak. He wasn't about to confess that he has – that would be too embarrassing! Especially telling his mom such private things between him and his boyfriend.

They didn't get to do it very often, but they have, mostly at Haru's place since he lived alone. Mrs. Tachibana waited patiently as Makoto tried to speak up, coherently this time, "M-Mom! That's embarrassing!" He finally said as Ren and Ran communicated mentally, shrugging as they figured it was a grown-up conversation.

Mr. Tachibana cleared his throat as he spoke up, "We just want you boys to be safe, Makoto" he took a sip of his coffee and continued, "Are you two being safe?" he asked, flipping a newspaper page.

Makoto's soul nearly escaped his body as it seeped out and hung outside his slightly gapped mouth.

He was about to try and say something when he heard someone come in. Haru was the only other person who had a copy of his house key. Thanking the universe for having his boyfriend come fetch him this time for school – he was just so glad to be saved from a very awkward conversation.

Haru stood at the entrance and said nothing as he nodded his good morning to Makoto's family as Makoto quickly stood up, nearly knocking his chair down. "Ah! Look at the time! Gonna be late for school if we don't leave now! C'mon Haru-chan, l-let's go!" Makoto mad dashed for the door when he heard his mom calling out to him, stopping him from escaping his very awkward torture that morning.

"Makoto, you're forgetting your lunch" She sweetly said, handing the bento to Makoto. "There's plenty of food for you to share with Haruka" She added as Makoto smiled and kissed her cheek before taking Haru's hand and frantically running off.

Walking to school, holding hands on their way, Makoto walked silently waiting for his heart beat to calm down. There was just too much excitement that morning in his house. Haru didn't understand any of it but he didn't really care anyway. Holding hands like this with Makoto, was slowly driving him insane. His will power faltering, all he wanted to do was go back to his house and have his way with Makoto.

Makoto's dad would be at work, his mom would probably be out, grocery shopping and would be out of the house for most of the morning, while his twin siblings would be at school. They would be all alone, with Makoto's family out, Haru would be in his own house as he's under Makoto, gripping onto those firm muscles, back arching in pleasure, gasping for air as Makoto had his way with him.

"Haru-chan?" Makoto finally calmed down enough to try and start a simple conversation with his boyfriend.

Snapping Haru out of his thoughts, his sorrowful lust filled eyes stared back at Makoto, waiting for him to continue. Makoto blushed, knowing that look all too well, feeling guilty that he couldn't do anything about it – at least not now.

"M-My m-mom a-asked an embarrassing question" He stuttered.

"Hm?"

"She asked if we've done it…"

"Yeah and?"

Makoto sighed, Haruka wasn't embarrassed by such things, and he shouldn't have expected any other reaction from him. Squeezing Haru's hand, Makoto continued, "Haru-chan! It was embarrassing! Knowing my parents, they'd probably try to help. Make sure we have what we need at all times and that's too much!" Makoto closed his eyes, heart racing again.

Haru scoffed, "So what. It's not like we can even do anything at your place to begin with"

Makoto groaned at his response, "Thanks. That makes me feel sooo much better…"

That day, Haru felt too out of his element to concentrate in school so he ditched during their lunch break with Makoto in tow.

"Where are we going?" Makoto asked as Haru silently held his hand and guided him towards the gates of the school.

"Your place" he simply said, not telling him about the condom that he stashed away in Makoto's room.

Once arriving at the entrance of Makoto's house, Haru couldn't take it any longer feeling as if he'd randomly combust any second as he shoved Makoto towards the wall next to the door and desperately gave Makoto an open-mouth kiss as they both moaned in unison.

It was then that the front door creaked opened and out came Mrs. Tachibana wearing her cooking apron with a cold look in her eyes while holding a wooden mortar and pestle in her hands as she grounded green wasabi roots.

"Hello boys" she said in an overly sweet but distant way that immediately caused Makoto and Haru to separate. They both shivered at the unpleasant sound of the grinding coming from her turning the fresh wasabi into a fine paste.

"M-M-Mom!" Makoto's screech came out in a high pitch tone. The fact that his mom kept catching him in the act plus the fact that he was ditching school – it was all too much for him and he knew that he was definitely dead this time. Grounded for life for sure.

Haru wanted to hit his head against the wall repeatedly.

He hated the Tachibana wooden kitchenware authority.

Would he ever get laid again?

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Done!

Mwahaha, poor Haru.

I originally planned on having five authorities that Mama Tachibana would cockblock her sons with but… seeing as this story has been sitting for years in my files, I decided to just end it on a high trolling cliff hanger note.

More MakoHaru, esp. Fem!HaruxMakoto will be coming in the near future!

Remember to R&R! Plz & Thankies! :]

I don't own Haruka Nanase or Makoto Tachibana – FREE! is owned by Kyoto Animation.

I just own the idea/plot/story/whatever you want to call it~ lol :P