(FFN and AO3 versions of this chapter are identical.)

(Yep, I'm back...! I'm still alive! Hope you enjoy this chapter, where we cover the trial against Sandra Macintosh.)

(Disclaimer: The extent of my experience with law is being a fan of Law & Order. If they're any law students out there reading this, I'd be interested to know how much of the legal stuff I got right...)

Sandra

It was the greatest parade I have ever seen. Hordes of cameras, all around me as I made my way into the courthouse. They were asking me questions. So many questions. That was the mantra of the day. My eyes kept drooping. The trial carried on and on and on. It started with my defense lawyer, who began his opening statement.

"The pokémon brothel at Hau'oli has been shut down. Why, this must be feather in the caps for the International Police. After all, this business has concrete links to Team Skull and even Team Rocket, the most notorious criminal organization in the world. So I ask you: why are they prosecuting my client? She is merely a decent, married woman with kids…who got into the affairs of a nasty criminal organization far beyond her control.

"Don't see her as a…pervert who exploits pokémon out of some sick desire. In fact, her relationship with the sylveon, on its own, is a harmless and consensual relationship between a pokémon and a human. She's not the one doing the exploiting. It's a far greater criminal organization that backs this brothel—a criminal organization my International Police friends are too inept to prosecute—that is the guilty party."

It grew cold. Cold, like I wished to have the sylveon's celestial warmth flowing into me. Something trembled in the courtroom. I shifted in my seat. I looked around, confused. Did I know then? Did I know that it wasn't going to end well for me?

Then came Looker. He had the pervert look about him, the way he gazed at the jury and the rest of the court in his opening address. If he had the chance, he would've abused those pokémon to high heaven. My knees grew weak with fright. He wasn't a man I'd even want to touch, let alone talk with—yet I did, in the trial. By some miracle, I survived that beast's wrath. Who was the beast, really? The pokémon? Or the human?

"It's not a question of where Sandra committed her crime. Neither is it a question of if Sandra has committed a crime. We, as human beings living among pokémon, have determined that pokémon are legally incapable of giving consent. You, the jury, are legally bound by that law to find Sandra Macintosh guilty of sexual abuse of a pokémon. Whether it occurred in an establishment affiliated with a bigger criminal organization—the crime of pokémon sexual abuse is the same, ladies and gentlemen. And that crime is a deplorable one which we need to punish the defendant for."

Christine

The trial of Sandra Macintosh was number six on the list of defendants to be tried. The trials were conducted only a few weeks after the raid. The Pokémon Association Chairman in particular was anxious for a high profile case such as this to be processed quickly.

In cases involving International Police, the Chairman of the Pokémon Association presides as the judge. All International Police agents, including myself, have at least basic training in law. A high-level International Police Agent, in this case Looker, was responsible for the prosecution. The jury consisted of 12 of the most preeminent pokémon experts, among them Professor Juniper (junior and senior), Professor Birch, and Professor Oak himself.

The first on the witness stand, for the defense, was Tania, the elderly lady who Sandra had become acquainted with. Mrs. Macintosh's defense attorney stood up to question her.

"When did you first meet Mrs. Macintosh?"

"I met her on the day she moved in."

"And what was your impression of her?"

"She seemed nice. Sandra—I mean, Mrs. Macintosh—asked me questions about Alola; not that that was anything unusual. Moving to Alola from the mainland does take a little getting used to."

"Of course. Did you ever see Mrs. Macintosh with a pokémon?"

"Why yes, I did. She had a male sylveon with her. I remember it was male because she got mad at me when I called it a 'she'. Silly me."

"Did the sylveon appear…hurt? Abused in any way?"

"No. It seemed quite happy. It was smiling at Sandra, and made its typical vocalizations, without any signs of distress."

"Did Sandra carry the sylveon in her arms, or in a pokeball?"

"No, he stood by her side. And he willingly followed Sandra as she walked."

"What was your occupation before you retired?"

"I worked for 40 years as a trained nurse at the Hau'oli pokémon center."

"So you could say you are knowledgeable as to the well-being of a pokémon," my attorney said.

"Yes."

"In your experience as a pokémon nurse, could you say as to the well-being of the sylveon with Mrs. Macintosh?"

"I would say the sylveon was a…normal, healthy pokémon."

"Thank you, nothing further."

Then it was Looker's turn. He stood up and walked towards the witness.

"'Seemed'? You said that Sandra 'seemed' friendly. Why only 'seemed'?"

"Well, she could be rather distant at times. There was one day, I met her on the street. She was awfully fidgety. Like she was distraught about something. She seemed to be in a real hurry to get somewhere."

"You say you saw the sylveon with Sandra once."

"Yes."

"Did you see the sylveon any other time?"

"No."

"Even having worked as a pokémon nurse for 40 years, can you make qualified assessments on a pokémon's complete mental state with just one brief encounter?"

"Well…no. I'd have to spend more time with the pokémon."

"One more question. Do you approve of humans having sexual intercourse with pokémon?"

She chuckled, and sighed. "Young man, it's not as cut and dry of a question as you're making it out to be. Not here in Alola, at least. When I was a nurse, I'd run a checkup on pokémon for some routine sickness. Many times, I'd notice signs of sexual penetration. Usually it's on the littler pokémon—they're just not physiologically adapted to the human anatomy. I could tell it was the trainers who'd done it.

"I didn't say anything though, because the pokémon seemed very happy with their trainers…almost too happy. So I wondered, you know. I never asked. But I wondered. I've never had sex with a pokémon before. I've never wanted to. But I just can't see it as something wrong enough to go to prison for."

Looker sighed deeply, and held his head low. "Nothing further." He had given up. But Tania, sitting on the witness stand, was calm as ever, with a little smile on her face. We had underestimated the old lady.

Sylveon

[OFFICIAL COURT TRANSCRIPT]

Bailiff: The People call the sylveon to the witness stand.

Chairman of the Pokémon Association (Judge): Is the pokémon translator ready?

Translator: Yes, I am ready.

Looker: When you first get to know the defendant?

Who?

Looker: The defendant. [points to Sandra Macintosh]

Oh, you mean the lady? I'm not sure…I've known her for a while, I guess.

Looker: How soon did she force you to have sex with her?

Defense: Objection, Agent Looker is leading the witness. It isn't the consensus that the sexual relationship was forced.

Looker: I'll rephrase. What did you do on the first night you met Mrs. Macintosh?

Well…you know that already, silly. [giggles] I told your translator person. [turns to the translator, seated in the court] Tell them. Tell this man what happened.

Looker: Please address the court.

But the translator's in the court, isn't he? See, he's sitting right there. You're not making any sense.

Looker: [sighs] How many times did you have sex with Mrs. Macintosh?

At least a few hundred times. I've lost count. That was business, though.

Looker: Business, I see. And what did you receive in return?

She'd give me money paper sometimes. Extra money paper that she didn't give to Master. It tasted disgusting when I tried to eat it. I don't know why the lady gave that to me.

Looker: Is this Master? [shows a picture of Kai Beverly]

Yes, that's Master.

Looker: Let the record show the sylveon has identified Kai Beverly, manager of the PokéPalace. Now, what else did you receive in return?

Nothing much.

Looker: What, no food, treats?

She gave me a pecha berry once at her house.

Looker: But in the PokéPalace? Did Mrs. Macintosh give you any food or treats?

No.

Looker: Were there times you did not want to have sex with Mrs. Macintosh?

Yes. But I have to. Even if the lady doesn't mind—she's very nice—Master will hurt me.

Looker: I see. While you were having sex with Mrs. Macintosh, was she, at any time, hurting you?

Well, yes. But I…I forgive her. I do. [turns to defendant] I forgive you. It's okay. [turns to Looker] I don't get you. I…erm…why are you making it so confusing? It's really simple. I think. Erm…can I have my candy now? You promised me you would after this thing.

Looker: Not yet. That man over there has some questions for you. I have nothing further.

Defense: Do you know what this is? [shows picture of a pokeball]

Yes, it's a pokeball.

Defense: You know that human pokémon trainers use these pokeballs?

Looker: Objection, relevance.

Defense: I'm trying to establish the true nature of the sylveon's relationship with my client.

Chairman: I'll allow it. Witness may answer.

No, I didn't know that.

Defense: Have you ever been inside a pokeball?

Yes. When Master took me back to the building, he used one to pick me up from outside the lady's house. It didn't feel good. It wasn't comfy.

Defense: If you do have a human trainer, you realize you'll be spending a lot of time in one of those pokeballs?

Looker: Objection.

Chairman: I'll allow it, but don't push it, counselor.

No, I didn't know that. That's not good. I don't like pokeballs.

Defense: So, tell me, would you ever want to have a human trainer?

No. That sounds horrible.

Defense: If Mrs. Macintosh wanted to have a legal relationship with her, she would have to make you her trainer.

Looker: Objection, argumentative.

Chairman: I'll allow it. But get to the point, counselor.

Defense: If Mrs. Macintosh were your trainer, you know she would have to keep you in one of those pokeballs for a long time?

Looker: Objection, witness is not qualified to answer.

Chairman: Sustained. Watch it, counselor.

What's going on? Why are you asking all these stupid questions? Why are you saying all these funny words. [yawns] I'm tired. [turns to Mrs. Macintosh] When are we going to make love again? I know, I know. Next time…I'll let you be on top. Won't that be nice? That'll be really nice. [smiles]

Defense: Mr. Chairman, I move to strike the pokémon's testimony. It's clear he's not responsive and incompetent to stand trial. In addition, Agent Looker is making it impossible for me to present my argument.

Chairman: That's not Agent Looker's fault, counselor.

Looker: Mr. Chairman, I…in retrospect, an open courtroom was not a good idea. Could the sylveon testify via closed circuit TV?

Chairman: I would've said yes to that, Agent Looker. I wouldn't have dreamed of putting a traumatized pokémon out here in front of all these people. But you should've thought about this sort of thing earlier. The jury has heard too much. I'm granting the defense's motion.

Why won't any of you listen to me!? You're just confusing me with all your questions and funny words. Where my candy? And I wanna see the laddy. When will I get to see her again? I wanna see the lady! I wanna see her! Please! Please!

Sandra

I have to admit something. I used to not think very highly of Christine. The woman who trapped me in that interrogation room, rattling me with question after question—perhaps, ironically, to make me faint from shock: like a pokémon. That was it. She didn't treat me like a person. When I fell in love with that pokémon, it brought me down to the level of pokémon in her eyes.

"The People call International Police Agent Christine."

There she sat, in the witness box. She was looking at me—no, my defense attorney. He looked at her back double. Her head was downcast, but she still was looking at my attorney.

Her fellow agent Looker stood up. "Agent Christine, would you tell the court what happened when you went undercover at the PokéPalace?"

"I…I posed as a customer one night. Then, I requested a job the PokéPalace. Working as a pokémon caretaker, I was able to infiltrate the operations of the pokémon brothel."

"What were your responsibilities?"

"I had to prepare and deliver food for pokémon."

"What did the pokémon in the brothel eat?"

My attorney stood up. "Objection, irrelevant. My client was not responsible for the brothel's cruel actions."

"Sustained."

Looker stuck his hands in the pockets of his long trench coat, and sighed. "Agent Christine, do you approve of sexual relations of any sort between a human and a pokémon?"

"Absolutely not. It is a vile and disgusting crime that needs to be stopped." That was rehearsed. I could tell, even before the meltdown she had later on.

"Thank you, Agent Christine. I have nothing further."

Then it was my attorney's turn.

"Agent Christine, could you tell us a little more about what happened when you…posed as a customer?"

For a moment, she glared at Looker, as if he wanted him to object. But he didn't understand. Rather, he frowned at her.

"Answer the question, Agent Christine," the Association Director said.

"I…I ordered a…session…with a male primarina. You understand, it was part of my cover—"

"But did you have sex with the primarina."

"Well, I—"

"Yes or no, Agent. Did you have sex with the primarina?"

"You have to understand—"

"What did I just say!?"

Finally, Looker stood up to protect her. That perverted coward. "Objection, badgering."

"Sustained. Move on, counselor."

"As soon as Agent Christine answers my question."

The Association Chairman turned to Christine. "Did you or did you not have sex with a male primarina while you were undercover?"

Her eyes were locked on the Chairman's when she said, "Yes."

My attorney smiled. "I see. Did you…enjoy it, Agent Christine?"

"Well—"

"In fact, let's face it. In the eyes of the public, you weren't an undercover Agent. You were…just as perverted of a sexual deviant as your fellow Agent Looker is making my client out to be."

"I—"

"Why did you have sex with the primarina?"

"Erm…I don't know."

"If you were trying to preserve your cover…could you not have just locked yourself in the room and pretended that it happened? Could you not have given it treats…or medicine, and then left? Hmm? Did you do that?"

"No, but I—"

"I see, you didn't. Instead, you chose to have sex with the primarina, something you yourself described just now as a 'vile and disgusting crime that needs to be stopped'. In fact, do you not personally consider any sex between a human and a pokémon to be rape?"

"Yes, but—"

"So, now, we all want to know, Agent Christine. Why did you it? Why did this…distinguished, experienced International Police Agent choose to…turn evil and…rape…this primarina. By your own admission we have to call it rape. So, we're all waiting, Agent. Why did you rape that primarina? Why did you rape that pokémon!?"

The commotion in the courtroom audience grew. This time, Looker was furious. "Objection! Does the defense have to continue this harassment!?"

"I HAD NO CHOICE!" Christine screamed, answering my attorney's question. Then it was dead silent. Her whole face was red. She was sobbing.

But no, my attorney was not finished. He still had to "continue this harassment", as Looker put it. "One more question. Do you have children?"

Yes, she did. Just like me. She had two children though, not one. She was married as well. To a woman, named Jan. How would Jan have reacted if she found out her spouse had sex with a pokémon? Would she have…yelled at her? Grabbed her? Tried to…win back her love by forcing her in bed? Like my husband: that vile-hearted, dirty little human.

My heart ached for Christine. Not the International Police Agent. But the woman, Christine. At the time, I hadn't personally met other people who had had sex with a pokémon before. And I wanted to be friends with Christine. I felt a pang of guilt in my stomach for having insulted her in the past. I mean, she was just doing her job as an International Police Agent, how could I blame her?

How could I blame her for anything?

(The trial continues in the next chapter...thanks for reading, and be sure to comment on your thoughts!)