Nothing Else Matters

Author: Geektaire

Summary:

Sometimes it's just a moment. A single choice which changes everything from then on. Sometimes it is the choice to allow a friend to walk away when you know they're hurting... sometimes it is to choose to find that friend and comfort them.

What would have happened if Daryl and Carol hadn't pulled away after he came back from the initial confrontation with the Saviors during the fall of Alexandria? What would have happened if instead of drifting apart, they had found their way back to one another ?

Well... why don't we find out?.

Notes: Thank you to all of you who helped me through this one. Especially to CharlotteAshmore that is an amazing beta and kept me going when I started to want to drop this for other stuff...

Chapter 1

He knew there was something wrong the moment she stiffened as he laid his hand on her shoulder. Her whole body tensed, and she hissed as he softly pressed her shoulder a little harder.

Her eyes looked up at him pleadingly, she didn't want to do it in front of everyone, she didn't want to seem weak in front of everyone. At his small nod, he could see how some of the tension drained from her body and there was gratitude in her eyes.

He would let it go for now, but just for now. Things had always been hard in this world, but they had been close this time. Too close. When he had heard the noise from the road, the need to go back to Alexandria, to go back to her was all he could think about. Nothing else mattered, nothing but coming back for her.

"Rough day, huh?" Her snort and low chuckle made part of the weight on his chest disappear, she just shook her head at him a little before pushing away from the pillar she had been standing against and walking away.

There was a lot to be done. He tried to keep an eye on her, but work didn't seem to allow him, ever. Bodies were scattered around, young and old, people he had never met in the couple of weeks they had been there. People Carol probably knew by name and backstory by then. People that, knowing her, she was already mourning. He couldn't help but shed a tear when he took the small body of the boy he had seen hanging around Carol, taking him and putting him in one of the graves which had been made for this.

It was then when he knew he needed to find her. He had no idea if she knew about Sam yet, but she was going to find out eventually. And losing yet another kid, even if they would never be Sophia, would hurt her deep into her very soul. And he couldn't pretend anymore, not after almost dying for the fiftieth time.

He was not going to stay away. He refused to stay away. He had stayed away long enough, he had no idea what had happened, but he knew it was bad just based on how things were now. He had slowly let her hide behind her little Suzy homemaker disguise and push him away. He was not going to allow it anymore, never again.

Glenn gave him a knowing look when he murmured where he was going, and before anyone else had a chance to say anything, he was off looking for her. It didn't take him long to find her.

Her bedroom door wasn't closed all the way, as if she hadn't been expecting anyone anytime soon. And other than them there wasn't going to be anyone else for some time. Michonne and Rick were going to be at Carl's side until he regained consciousness, and Tara was taking care of Little Asskicker. He had walked up the stairs as quietly as usual, not wanting to wake her up in case she had fallen asleep.

She wasn't asleep.

The sound of his sharp intake of breath made Carol jump and turn to look at him, trying to cover her naked back as she did so. But it was too late, he had seen.

Her shoulders and head dropped as she let her shirt fall, her back to him once more.

He felt like he couldn't breathe. The right side of her back, from her hip to her shoulder was an ugly blue color. He couldn't move as he watched her shoulders start to shake, as she wrapped her arms slowly across her front, shielding herself from the outside. But letting him keep a watch on her back, as if unconsciously knowing that he would always watch her back, always.

When the sound of her sobs reached his ears, it was like whatever hadn't let him move suddenly disappeared. In three strides he was kneeling behind her in the bed, his calloused hands softly touching the edges of her bruises. Softly, barely touching really.

From up close he could see that it wasn't just that huge bruise, there were more, many more. Scattered all around, from her back, to her arms, to the part of her chest he could glimpse from behind her. His best friend was in pain, and if her tears were any indication it wasn't just physical pain she was battling.

"Are they all dead?" Carol didn't seem to have heard him, her sobs making it even harder for her to breathe. Slowly, trying not to spook her, Daryl took a deep breath before he put one arm around her waist, making sure it was a lot lower than where he shouldn't be touching, and pulled her to him.

She stiffened in pain, but she allowed him to pull her back against him. She sagged against his chest, turning her face a little to hide it in his neck.

Daryl tensed, he had never been this close to another human being in his life. The closest had been that hug he had given her when they found each other again, or when he had carried her out of the tombs all those months ago. But never like this, this was more intimate than anything he had ever felt in his life.

He wanted to run.

But he didn't.

Instead, Daryl put his other arm on top of hers, across her collarbones and pulled her closer. His shoulder throbbed with pain, and he was sure he wasn't supposed to be doing that with his stitches brand new. But she needed him, and he needed her.

It took her a long time to calm down, he wouldn't have realized night had fallen if she hadn't started shivering from the cold. He blushed when he was suddenly reminded that she was half naked in his arms.

"You're cold," Daryl murmured as he slowly moved away from her, blushing as he looked everywhere but at her. "You should take a hot shower; it'll help with the pain."

Carol, her back still to him, nodded, groaning in pain as she slowly stood up. "I'm going to…" Daryl shook his head, swallowing as he quickly moved towards the door.

"Daryl…" Carol calling out his name made him look up, blushing again when he saw her looking over her shoulder with a small smile at him. "Thank you."

He gave her a small smile, nodding towards the bathroom before he made his quick escape. He needed to take a shower himself, and get them something to eat. She had pushed her way into his heart when he needed her the most, when he was at his lowest. And now it was his turn to do the same.

He owed it to her; he owed it to them.

-.-.-

It had been a difficult couple of months for her, for them. The weight of everything that had happened since the prison fell was suddenly brought upon her shoulders, all the losses were suddenly so tangible that she didn't know why she hadn't just folded and checked out.

No, that was not true. She knew why, and that reason was currently stealing one of the still hot cookies from the cooling rack and eating it in only one bite.

"Daryl!" She whined, mock exasperation in her voice. The worst part was that he knew she was not mad at him; she could never be really mad at him. He just grinned, before he moved his hand to steal another one, grinning even more when he was able to do it with just a mild swat on the back of his hand from her. "Those are for everyone."

He said nothing, the corner of his lip raised in a small smile she knew she was unable to not reciprocate. The last two months had been hard for everyone, but they had been a little less difficult for her with him by her side.

And he had not left her side for the first week after what had happened. He had been her silent companion, knowing when he needed to push and when she just needed him to be there. Slowly, after many nights spent without sleeping, one by one her sins seemed to pour out of her.

And one by one, as if by confessing them she had found forgiveness, the weight she felt upon her shoulders, upon her very own soul, started to become lighter and lighter. It was during that second week when the truth about what had happened to Mika and Lizzie had come out.

Carl had been brought back home that day, and it was possibly the fact that it was yet another child she had been unable to help; that the girls made an appearance of her dreams. She had woken up to find herself sobbing against her pillow, knowing even in her dreams that no one must hear her plight. But apparently 'no one' didn't include Daryl Dixon.

He had been as gentle as the day he'd found her half naked and bruised up, as he silently laid on her bed beside her and brought her head to his chest.

And she had let it all go, she had told him about Karen and David, about how it had been mercy and not coldness which caused her decision.

She talked about Ty, about telling him what had happened and about putting her life in his hands. And she had told him about the two little girls she had failed, about how guilty she felt for ignoring Lizzie's sickness; and for how much of a monster she was for having murdered a little girl under the claim of being 'for the greater good'.

He hadn't said anything at the beginning, and that had only made Carol cry harder. She knew there was a possibility he could hate her forever for what she had done. But as usual when it came to him and his ability to see the good in people, even in her, she wasn't wrong.

It wasn't until a few hours later, when the sun started to lighten up the sky and the birds started to sing, when she had finally run out of tears and was close to sleep as she let his heartbeat lull her into sleep, that he finally spoke.

And in just a few sentences he just made her world shift on it's axis. His logic was solid, if she was a monster for protecting their family, for killing for them, for him? Then he was just as big of a monster as she was. He was as undeserving of love, and compassion, and happiness as she was in that case; since he had killed almost as many people as she had.

Her immediate reaction was to scold him, he was the best man she had ever known. He was the best man she had ever loved, and she was not going to stand there and allow him to call himself a monster. His knowing smile as he told her 'likewise' made her cry again.

But this time they were tears of healing.

The next big step was the day when he finally found out what had happened that day. When he found out the reason for her bruises, or at least the biggest one, hadn't been the wolves or the walkers, but Morgan slamming her against the concrete floor in the basement of a building and knocking her out.

Morgan had approached him with questions, questions on who she was and what she had been before the 'turn'. Questions Daryl definitely didn't approve of Morgan asking. He had brought it up with Denise and Tara, without even meaning to.

And Denise had been the one to slip up. He might have reverted to angry scary Daryl, as Glenn had called him once, but he had gotten the whole story about Carol's injuries. And the next time he had seen Morgan approach her, he had seen all the signs. Her stiff posture, her eyes looking everywhere for a way out; the unshed tears in her eyes.

He hadn't told Rick why Abraham had needed to drag him away from Morgan. But Carol's tender touch as she'd wiped the blood from his face was worth every blow Morgan had been able to land. She was worth every blow Morgan had been able to land.

And that had been what brought them to that moment, to share cookies and smiles before he left on a much needed run with Rick.

"Those are two cookies less that you and Rick will be taking with you, just so you know…" There was a teasing smile on her face, and Daryl felt his heart beat faster at the sight of it.

"Awww, c'mon," he murmured as he moved closer to her. "Don't be like that…"

"Like what? You're the cookie thief." She was looking mock stern, but her eyes were smiling. And that's what mattered to him.

"How about I look for some chocolate for you while I'm out?"

"Are you bribing me, Mr. Dixon?" He could feel his face flushing at her teasing words, but he couldn't help but raise his face and smirk at her.

"What if I am?"

"I might need to report you to constable Grimes for that…" Daryl could feel his smile widening as she took a step closer to him while he did the same.

"Did you call?"

Daryl jumped away, moving to pick up his bag quickly as Rick entered the kitchen. "I'm gonna go see Denise about the medical shit." He murmured as he hid behind his hair, not even giving her a second glance as he practically ran away from their home. He had no idea what he was doing, but it had almost felt like something important. It was something important, even his virgin ass knew that.

He couldn't help but laugh on the inside at Denise, the girl was as lost as he was. But at least, from what he got, she had actually done something. She was doing something. The soda suddenly jumped up a few steps on his priority scale. He was bringing back that, and chocolate. Those were his two allowances.

When he got to Rick, he was already sitting inside the car they were going to take with them. He was sitting there, eating some of Carol's cookies. "These are good…" Rick smirked as he saw Daryl's annoyance on his face, as he snatched the bag away from him and stuffed it in his bag.

"They're for later," Daryl grumbled as he tried to look inconspicuous around them.

"She had to go back in because Judy started to cry; she waited as long as she could." There was no malice in Rick's voice, and Daryl shrugged as he opened the passenger seat and dropped himself on it. "She told me to tell you, 'Nine lives, remember?' whatever the hell that means."

"Everything," Daryl said softly as he looked up at her window and saw her waving at him with Little Asskicker on her hip, "it means everything."