I do not own persona

It's a secret to Everyone:

The Pink Lady

Summary: Dating Ichiko is…an experience to say the least. The good news is Akira is never really bored around the spunky woman. The bad news? The girls may need therapy after meeting her….

-OOOO-

"Oh, thank god you're here."

Akira should be looking at Lala's exasperated expression behind the bar counter. However, his cool onyx eyes are drawn to the near passed out drunk woman sitting alone at the table. Her head looking to slammed on the desk with the glass fill with alcohol in her hand the only thing keeping her up right in her chair.

"She's been like that for the past six hours…." The boisterous bar owner had called him over his girlfriend's phone for something important. Apparently, it was to pick her up.

"Heeeyyyy~! There's that *hic*sexy man~!"

Noticing her high school lover in the doorway, the pissed drunk woman turned around, nearly falling out her chair and waved her eyebrows in pathetically sexy manner at the young man. Ichikio Ohya, Akira's girlfriend, is a 'proud' reporter.

"Come give momma a smmooocchhhh~"

Although the man himself is wondering if caretaker is more the term for it.

It is late into the night, and Akira was just about to go to bed when he got a call form Lala telling him to, in her words, 'pick up his drunk husband.' Ignoring the fact that the barista implied that he is married, he couldn't deny that when his girlfriend gets drunk, she act's more like a perverted old man.

"Thanks for the call Lala. I'll get her home safe." Akira sighed as he walked over the hammered woman.

"Honestly the poor girl just came in a drunk herself sick." Lala sighed before giving Akira a hard stare. "You didn't do anything did ya boy?"

Akira rubbed the back of his head. Just as confused as the bartender herself. "I can't think of anything. She was really happy after our date today."

'Really happy.' Akira suppressed a smile as he remembered the dazed looks both him and his girlfriend had after their time in the love hotel.

"Oh, lover boy made me happy alr*hic*alright heh heh heh…." Although Ichiko's pervy grin made everyone in the room sigh. There was even a small sigh form Akira's bag that only he could hear.

"Oh boy…Just take her home safely." The bar own nodded her head to the door.

Akira nodded and went to pick up his dizzy lover.

"Oohh~…Are we going back to the ho-*hic* ho*hic* love shack?" the older woman giggled dizzily as Akira lifted her on his back.

"Something like that…" Akira gave a little chuckle as he exited the bar.

-OOO-

It is a late night on the streets of Shibuya. There weren't many people on the streets around ten pm on a Sunday night. The everyday businessman and woman were in their homes asleep and safe. While the wild and deadly drug dealers and Yukuza members prowled the alleys.

It isn't normal for a young high schooler to be out this late. But Akira isn't exactly normal. Nor is his love life as it seems.

"Why are you dating this woman again?" Asked Morgana as he popped out his bag. The black and white cat giving his friend a dead panned look. "This is the third time we've found her like this."

"She's not a drunk." Arkia said firmly.

"Heh he-*hic* heh…. The moon is so big…" Ichikio said in daze. As she looked at closed store.

If Morgana had eyebrows, he would rise them.

"Look she's been though a lot recently." Akira sighed as his girlfriend giggled on his back. "She did nearly get fired and found out her friend is safe. The weight of everything and dating a guy that could potential make her lose her career must not help ether."

"I am starting to wonder if being with me is really helping her…" Akira mumbled while the reporter on his back drooled and giggled.

"Well either way, the train to her place isn't running anymore. Are you going to take back to the café?" The cat asked with a tilt of it's head.

"Yeah." Akira nodded. "Sojrio knows about me dating someone on the older side. So, he won't mind- "

"Argh!? Ann your stepping on my-ack!?"

"Be quite Ryuji! They'll hear us!"

"Err…Najima-san. Ryuji's turning blue- "

"Quite pancake boy!"

"Well there's goes that secret…" Akira sighed as he recognized the voices form the alley way beside him.

"How did you keep your identity hidden for so long…" Morgana sighed.

"Makoto. Your going to kill Ryuji if you don't let go of him." Akira spoke to his friends hiding behind the trash can.

"Ack! Err…m-meow?"

"You do know I am an actual cat, right?" Morgana said.

Out of the alley the phantom thieves all came out with rather disappointed. And Ryuji gasping for air.

"So, it looks like you guys have taken the Najima school of stalking." Akira grinned at his friends as the all looked very sheepish. Well Ryuji is still gasping for air, and Akechi just had embarrassed but cheerful grin.

"Err…well…" Haru fidgeted with her fingers as she tried to explain. "We wanted to drop by for some last-minute plans on invading Sae-san's palace and we saw you leave and- "

"Makoto rushed to stalk you." Yusuke said bluntly.

"I-I didn't say stalk him! I-I said I wanted to observe him!" Makoto huffed.

"But why are you out here so late? And who is that?" Ann asked.

"Yeah is that your aunt?" Ryuji asked after he face regained it's color.

"Hesy! I amsh his glirfriend yous-yous…. YOUS!"

Akira sighed at the sudden drunken outburst of the woman on his back and the shocked and bemused faces on his teammates.

"…I am not going to say she's wrong…." Akira gave a weak smile.

"Whoa dude. Didn't think you have a taste for older women." Ryuji said blinking in shock.

"Is she…drunk?" Makoto narrowed her eyes in suspicion at low humming woman on his back.

"Only a lit- "

"Akira~…W-Where are the-*Hic* Handcuffs…You said-*Hic* We were going to play hardcore cops and-*Hic* booty?"

"She's as drunk as a skunk and anything she says is nothing more than a bold face lie." Akira's attitude changed so fast that everyone nearly got whiplash.

"Dose she cops and robbers? What does the posture have to do with that game?" Yusuke innocently.

"Oh ho?" There was a dark gleam in Futaba's eyes as she took out her phone. "Want me to look it for you Inari?"

"Futaba no!" Ann screamed down the suggestion in embarrassment while Makoto turned beet red.

"I must say Akira." Akechi smiled. "I never thought you would have such…interesting taste in women."

While Akira just rolled his eyes, the reporter stumbled off of Akira's back, nearly tripping over herself, as she made a drunken war path towards Akechi.

"Hey- "

"Now listen here you detective prince wanna be! My man is not only one times a better man then you, he's one hundred and ten inches of pure man! You limp dick dork!"

Akira turned pure red at his girlfriend told his…size to the world.

"Um…." While the girls, and few passersby, turned red and speechless at the sudden admission.

"Wow Leader…" Futaba blinked dumbly before speaking her mind. "Your hung huh?"

"Futaba!?" This time it was Makoto who chastised the younger phantom thief. Ann was too busy imitating a fish out water while Haru looked to have found the meaning of the universe with her thousand-mile stare.

"Oh, we were all thinking it!" The spunky red head protested.

Akira had his face in his hands in utter mortification. "Just…fucking kill me…"

"Your girlfriend has the fucking you part down to a damn science dude…." Gave a reassuring pat on Akira's back.

"But that doesn't make sense…" Yusuke rubbed his chin in thought. "Akira your only about feet elven inches. How are you one hundred and ten inches of a man?"

"…. Bless your heart Yusuke…" Morgana just sighed in Akira's bag.

"And he can whip a fake, daddy issued brat like you any day!" Ohya continued her slurred, drunken tirade as she jabbed the detective prince in the chest with her finger.

"Yous! Yous! Yous-Ugh…"

"Oh man! Watch out Akechi! She's going spew!" Ryuji shouted just before-

"Ughhhh!"

-OOO-

"Well…" Akira tried not smile as he watched the washing machine tumble and jitter with the young detective's shirt. "Didn't think she'd vomit on you. Sorry."

"No no. It's fine. She must have a lot of stress on her shoulders." Akechi smiled in his collared shirt as he leaned against the dryer.

In the laundry mat, both the detective prince and Akira waited for the shirt in the washing machine to dry. The girls had taken Akira's drunk girlfriend to the public bath to try and sober her up while the Ryuji and Yuskue also took a bath. Leaving the two young men alone

"I've heard that being a reporter can be tough, but well seeing your girlfriend makes me glad to be a detective." Goro chuckled.

"Yeah still sorry about that." Akira winced a little at the words his girlfriend swapped at Akechi.

The young detective, gave a weary smile. "Though her words did hurt a little."

"I don't think you have a limp dick."

"N-Not that!" Getting knocked out his mood by Akira's blunt statement made the Akechi's face burn.

Akira merely chuckled as flustered young man sighed.

"What do you really have some daddy issues or something?" Akira said in between his laughter.

"Well…no. Though I wouldn't say my father is a man of…stature." There was a change in the air as Akechi spoke. His smile was…false. There was no denying it. It is a fake smile. More fake then Akira is used to. His laughter died as he saw a storm of emotions swirl in the young man.

"…She's a reporter Akechi." Akira sighed. "She's bound to look into people and find some stuff out. And you are rather famous. I wouldn't be shocked if she knew the color of your socks."

"Yes well. Just tell her to be very careful of where she…. snoops about." Once again Akechi had that fake smile. A fake smile that tired to hide an emotion that Akira knew all to well.

Rage.

Those words and the feeling from Akechi made Akira tense up and narrow his eyes behind his glasses. "And why's that?"

"Well there are many unsavory types that would do harm to her finding out things she shouldn't." The detective said like it was a fact. So light and airy like death was nothing of consequence to him.

Akira held back, as he said. "And are you saying your father is one of those 'unsavory types'?"

"Oh heavens no." Quickly the so-called prince waved his hands back and forth in denial. "He may have a temper, but he wouldn't go as far as actually harm someone. I am merely saying that she should be careful."

"And you?"

"Pardon?" Akechi looked like a innocent child caught with his hands in the cookie jar. But the way his eyes sparked as Akira took a step forward towards said something else.

"It sounded like you were making a threat, if not your father, then what about you? Detective?" Akira should have just let it drop. He's knows what's at stake if Akechi suspects something with him and his teams plan to betray him. But he's no fool to ignore a threat on his lover when he sees one so plainly.

"Me? Now what do I have against Ichiko-san?"

"Oh nothing…. just that she maybe finding out things she shouldn't." Akira narrowed his eyes hard at the so-called prince. Who seemed just on edge as he was.

"I am merely making a suggestion Akira- "

"I'll be clear; Threats against anyone close to me, my team, my friends, and my girlfriend, don't get a pass."

"And what am I to you?"

The thumping sound of the dryer was the only thing that could be heard between the two.

"…A partner." Akira said finally.

"A partner that still seems out of the loop on certain...aspects of being a phantom thief…" This time Akechi took a step forward with cold grin.

The buzzer of the direr smashed the tension like a sledgehammer. Making both teenagers look at now quite machine with icy expressions.

"…It's late. We both need sleep if we're going to steal Sae's treasure." Akira sighed.

"Indeed. This sense bickering will get us nowhere." The chuckled as he took his jacket out of the machine.

"Besides," Akechi smiled again. This time his normal fake heartless smile that make his fanbase squeal in delight as he walked out. "When we finish with Same the phantom thieves will be no more anyway."

"…. We'll see about that." Akira whispered as he watched the so-called detective walk away. The young man not knowing about the gun pointed at the back of his head. "You false prince…."

-OOO-

"Ahhh~…. This bath is so nice." Ann sighed as she relaxed in the public bath. After Ichiko had stained the prince's clothes, the girls decided to take a bath in the late- night public bath. With it being so late, no one was in there, so they had the whole place to themselves.

"U-Umm…" Haru held back a nervous smile. The reporter giving the young heiress a hard stare.

"Hrmmm…." At her chest.

"O-Ohya-san- "

"Amazing…"

"Eh-Kya!?"

"What is with this amazingly fluffy body!?" The half drunken woman grabbed and groped at Haru's body like a perverted old man. Squeezing at places that Haru didn't know she had and making the poor girl blush and squirm.

"It so soft and plump! But not remotely fat!"

"Um…. Ohya-san! C-Clam down!" Ann tried to get Ohya to stop her invasive touching.

"Eeep!" Until the older woman lunged at her and started molesting her body.

"And this! Just…. all of this! It's amazing!" Ohya was stupefied by Ann's fit and perfect body.

"He-hey! Wh-where are you touching!?" Ann snapped as the rest of the phantom thieves looked on with worry.

"Ohya-san is rather…lively…" Haru said with a massive blush

"This butt! It's too great!"

"Khya!? St-Stop that!"

As the next victim, Makoto was being attacked, the older woman rubbing her face against the student council presidents rear, Futaba agreed with the heiress. A little.

"Lively? Somehow, she got a bottle of sake in here." Futaba deadpanned as she hid behind Haru while Makoto turned to push the slightly drunk woman. "She's kind of impressive in her own way…. "

"Uwaa…your all so good looking…" Going form groping to moping, Ohya found herself being buried in Ann's chest. "Ugh…he's so going to dump me…."

"I mean look at all of you." The half sober woman lowered herself into the water. "Your all so young and cute….and I am an old hag that gets hammered on the weekends."

"D-Don't say that." Haru tried to comfort the older woman while not trying to get groped.

"It's going to happen!" Ohya declared. Pointing a sake bottle that she got form…. somewhere at the girls. "Mark my words! One of you are going to shack up with him in that strange cat bus of yours and I am going to be left back at Lala's all by myself."

There was bit of pause in the half drunk half sober woman's thoughts. "…Although I've always wanted to try a threesome so maybe…" Was what she said before drowning the whole bottle.

"C-Cat bus!?" Ann stammer.

"Ah ha ha! Y-Your just a little too drunk Ohya-san! Been watching too many movie- "Makoto tried to diffuse the idea.

"Oh, cut it out already. I figured out your all phantom thieves. Even limp dick prince too. *Hic*" Before the reporter waved her off.

"Wha-We aren't- "

Point at each girl, form Ann, to Makoto, to Haru and then Futaba, Ohya said. "Panther. Queen. Noir. And oracle of ages. No. inkling err…. your something…."

"What the- "Futaba looked frantic as she asked. "Did Akira spill the beans on us or something!?"

"Oh god no. My man kept his lips seal tighter then a safe." Taking another swig of her second…. third bottle of sake, the reporter waved off the idea. "Nah I just figured it all out by looking at ya. You're not good at hiding it."

"We've been told…." Makoto sighed at how bad the team is at keeping their identities hidden.

"Akira dose talk a lot about a smart reporter that's helps us out every now and then." Ann said as she started to relax a little. "I guess that's you."

"Yeah. Weren't you the one who got them out of that jam with that Junya creep?" Futaba perked up from behind Ann.

"Akira told me the heat was getting all over you guys." Futaba said. "But then some reports came out and things around you kind of died down."

"You've helped us a lot more then you think. If anything, we should be thanking you for getting us out those situations." Makoto said with a thankful smile and small bow

Ohya blushed like a schoolgirl. Both form Makoto's praise and the liquor in her system. "Heh heh…. Yeah what am I thinking! That dork is too in love with me!"

The near middle-aged woman stood up in determination, "Like hell he's going to dump me! And if even thinks about it, I fuck him so good, he can't live without me! *HIC*!"

Getting her, honestly tenth, sake bottle, Ohya raised it in the air in triumph. "Let's drink the night away ladies!"

"Whaa! W-We're too young!"

On the other side of the wall….

"The hell are they doing over there…"

Ryuji deadpanned by him and Yusuke relaxed in the bath. With morgana casually swimming around in the waters.

-OOO-

"Mrghhh…" The sun peeking through curtains assaulted the reporter. Making her toss and turn in a rather familiar but unknown bed in aggravation.

"Mmmm…Akira…. blow up the sun…. it's being mean to me…."

"Well first off I am not Akira." Sojiro's deadpanned responds jolted Ichiko awake.

"Eh-Agh!? Head…. hurts…hangovers…. evil…" However, as she jumped up to straighten herself out in the bed, her head spun.

The coffee man chuckled as he handed her a mug of coffee. "This should help the hangover."

The reporter happily took the cup. "T-Thanks."

"Mmm…" The small sip she took swiftly sooth her aching head. "Akira made this didn't he? He coffee is the best cure for hangovers…"

"Heh. Never knew the kid had this type of taste in women." Sojiro chuckled. "He'll be up here in a sec. just had to take care of the customers downstairs."

After the reporter watched the coffee maker walk downstairs, she looked down at her coffee in deep thought. A twenty-nine-year-old woman dealing with a hanger over in her boyfriend's room.

Who's still in high school

"Ugh…" Throwing her back on Akira's bed, Ichiko sighed. Even with her lover's scent comforting her, she felt no joy in it as realty hit like a truck. "Just what am I doing…"

"Well your hogging my bed for one thing."

Akira said as she walked up the steps to his room. A joking grin on his face as he cleaned his hands on his apron.

"Please tell me I didn't do anything stupid…" Ichiko was practically begging as she lowered her head in shame.

"Well…" That cocky smile never left Arkia as he walked to her. "You molested girls."

"Ugh…"

"You nearly made out with Ann."

"Agh…."

Akira held up two fingers. "Twice."

"Wwwhhhyyyy…."

"Oh, you also slapped Makoto's ass. Saying, and I quote, 'This ass is blessed by Izanagi himself!'"

"Kill me…kill me now…." Pure and utter defeat. The report felt that she hung head, wishing she had drunk herself to death last night instead.

"Oh, and you threw up on Akechi."

"Oh, so it wasn't all bad." Ichiko mood immediately brighten while Akira chuckled.

"Heh heh." Akira grinned. "I think you made a good impression on them."

"Oh sure." Ichiko groaned. "They all know I am some raving, perverted drunk who prays on younger boys and girls."

"I…" Ichiko looked at her lover with sadden and confused eyes. "Why me…"

Ichiko counited when she saw the baffled look on his face. "I hitting thirty next month. I drink when I worried. I can have to shortest temper in the world and I am way too stubborn. And my idea of a romantic night is going home and watching anime or Netflix…."

"I am not as sexy as Ann and me sure as hell am not as rich as that Haru." The more truths that she spoke more heavy her shoulders got. "My grades in high school were far form what Makoto has."

"You're a smart guy Akira." The reporter said as she looked at her boyfriend. "Screw being a phantom thief and coffee part timer. You could be the CEO of some major company or something. So why hang around a girl who's only charm is that she can hold her drink?"

"I guess that's why you were drinking huh?" Akira said as he sat down next to her. "Well for one thing, none of the girls would be cute drunks. Makoto without her holding back is…" Akira went a little pale at the thought before continuing.

"But…drive Ichiko. It's...something else. Even with the weight of the world on your shoulder's, your articles disgraced, you still stayed in the business. You could leave at any time and moved on. You're not and writer, and you could have jumped anywhere else. But your love for your job, kept you going. Even if you hated it, you still kept going. It's not a feeling I am unknown too…"

"My mother…she sent me her to 'set me straight'." The young man explained. "So, I wouldn't be just like her. She's so worried that I'd- "

"Turn into the next Black devil yankee that even the yakuza feared?"

It's rare to surprise the leader of the phantom thieves. To see him wide eyes and baffled is as rare as seeing the sun turn blue. And yet that's just what he looks like at the moment.

Unlit he narrowed his eyes when he put the pieces together. "…. Did you seriously look me up? I already have Futaba knowing about that…"

"Oh, come on!" Ichiko threw her hands up in protest. "You're the leader of the phantom thieves! Anyone would be curious about your past!"

"…." Akira just have a hard stare at her.

"Ok sorry…" The older woman bowed her head in apology.

Until she picked it back up with bright curious eyes. "But seriously, did your mom break the backs of a whole biker gang-ack!?"

Akira playfully chopped the mouthy woman on her head.

"My point is." Akira sighed. "You weren't the only one with a massive burden. And yet seeing you, not running away at even a hint of trouble…I can't tell you the many times I wanted to just…get away form all this before I became a phantom thief. All the weight to keep my grades up, being the good boy at school by keeping my head. And it's all gone because some bald prick had an axe to grind…"

"Well it's not like I wasn't scared or anything. And I am still bitter about the whole thing." Ichikio scratched her cheek a little in embarrassment. But regained her smile none the less. "And you got me out some major trouble too. Guess we're even then huh?"

"Heh. I guess so." Akira smirked.

"Well enough negative talk!" The reporter jumped out of bed with cheery grin on her face. "I am sober and ready to report my findings."

"You sure you don't want to take a rest today?"

"You sure you don't want to know the color of Sae's panties?"

"Tell me more." Immediately Akira's hands were under his chin with his glasses shining mysteriously in the sun light.

"Well their no thongs, sadly, but the girl seriously needs to get laid. Her everyone in her office is practically scared of her."

As Ohya reported her findings on Makoto's older sister, Akira didn't hide his grin. Knowing she'll be just as drunk tomorrow as she was last night.

'And I wouldn't have it any other way.'

The dislike that Ohya gets is very unwarranted. While I feel it's only the loud mouths of the persona fandom, those who say she's the worst character, are wrong, but also right. She's only bad because, compared to the whole cast, she's normal. Plain. She's honestly the more realistic character here compared to the super sexy model Ann, the near perfect girl Makoto, the super hacker Futaba, the kind rich girl Haru, your teacher who has the highest social taboo appeal, Tae who's just…what even doctor acts like that? Hifumi's fame and fun personality, Chihaya's country accent and mystical air. All that and what is Ichiko? A reporter that gets hammered.

Not the most exciting thing compared to everyone else. Doesn't help that skills, while not 100% useless, they are since stealth and getting kicked out of palaces are very forgiving on standard difficulty. I doubt anyone reading this has even been kicked out of place on the hardest difficulty. And if they have it was only once I bet.

Ichiko has the same issue that Yukiko has in p4, which is funny since their English VAs are the same. She can't compare to the other characters who just outshine her. She's not bad, just out shined.

And let's be real, a good chunk of us would love to have her as a drinking buddy or wife.

Anyway, the next character should be Haru….hopefully. Futaba I still need to come up with. I have Chihaya's, Hifumi's, and Lavenza's ideas ready to write. Just need to write them.

Also, all those dates in the OVA's where great, though Sae's was my favorite and truly was a surprise. Looks like they had my idea and wanted her to be the last surprise. XD

Either way, I hope you enjoyed this!