Note: This is being posted with permission from Hitome-Chan.

Warning: This is rated 'M' for a reason, I don't make light of the rating system, and it gets progressively more mature as these go on.

Summary: Nico never allowed himself to touch, only to be touched, it was better that way. Percy/Nico

Sensory Love

Chapter One: To Touch

Feelings can be corporeal and intangible at the same time, love especially. To feel love one must use all of his or her senses completely. Sight, smell, taste, hearing and touch, especially. Without any of these fueling your emotions how can you call what you have love? Your heart beats faster when you see and catch the scent of your desired beloved, a lull of calmness washes over you from the sound of their voice, your lips aflame as you taste their mouth, and your body not far behind wrapped around them, skin on skin making life so much sweeter.

When denied these things, when every facet of your being is rejected, it can cause the most primal of emotions, which is where Nico found himself. Depressed and rejected. Not on purpose mind you, Percy Jackson was just incredibly ignorant. Percy also had his on-again-off again girlfriend Annabeth to keep him blissfully oblivious. Annabeth was a perceptive girl, she knew of Nico's affections, but she didn't acknowledge them, which, in her mind, was as good as if they did not exist. But, Nico didn't hold that against her, he knew she knew, and she knew that he knew she knew, and as confusing as it all seemed they were still friends. It, of course, wasn't anything personal, matters of the heart never are.

The problem with it all being: Percy was his best friend. One of his only real friends. Which is why it was difficult falling in love with him. In love with his smell, with his voice, with the very essence that was Percy Jackson. The way his nose wrinkled when he smiled, or how his eyes always teared up when he laughed. Nico loved everything about Percy, how he could be unintentionally annoying, and how there were times that Nico just couldn't stand to be in the same room as him, those were the times he loved him still.

To be truthful, Nico did more than love Percy Jackson, his heart craved Percy's affections. He wanted to Percy's constant thought, his sole source of camaraderie, the only one who would love Percy like a lover, and not a friend. Nico sat back against his bed in the small two bedroom apartment he shared with his father, both his mother and his sister passed away quite a few years ago in a car crash. Nico couldn't help but to think of how many holes there were in his heart with them gone and with his not-so-new feelings, he couldn't love anyone without feeling some sort of pain. Every time he considered a relationship with someone, every time, there were complications. You can't just fall in love, not alone at least. But Nico fell in love all by himself and it was beginning to wear on him, as these things typically do. At first it isn't so bad, being lonely in love, and you can smile—but in his solitude Nico couldn't help but almost cry every day. He didn't though, his father had taught him to stronger than that, but sometimes, sometimes it was almost too much.

There was a knock on his door, three sharp taps and Nico knew it was his father. He straightened his face, fell into a mask of indeterminable emotion and wiped his eyes. "S'open." He called, his father hated weakness, he hated the thought of ever being weak and Nico knew that if that man knew what he was feeling he would be as good as disowned. Not that he and his father really hung out much, but they got along in some ways.

Nico's Dad, affectionately called Hades by just about everyone (even his boss), was a man with a slim and handsome face, he had impossibly dark eyes and loosely curled black hair like Nico's, only longer. His smiles were things of legend, and Nico was hardly sure if there was ever one on his face that didn't denote sarcasm or biting remarks, and yet he was the only person Nico truly got along with—well besides…

"Your friend's here." Hades said, staring down at Nico from his very tall vantage point. "Princeton."

"Percy, Dad." Nico corrected.

"Whatever," He stepped out of the way and Percy stepped into the room, smiling sheepishly. Hades creeped him out and Nico knew it, he scared Percy enough that the young man would only come over if he hadn't seen Nico in a few weeks time. "Dinner'll be ready in a few," Hades called closing the door behind him.

"Hey, man," Percy said in that tangible and friendly way he always did and Nico felt a strain against his eyes to examine every mole and freckle on Percy's beautiful face, to study the lines and details in his lips, and to wonder how such a pink color could exist. But he just sat down on his bed.

"Hey," Nico returned outwardly calm. If ever there was something he picked up from his father it was the way to carry himself, to make it seem like nothing was wrong. That's how they got through his mother and his sister's deaths, and that is how he was going to get over Percy Jackson.

"What have you been up to Nico?" Percy asked, jumping on the other side of bed and sinking into it, he always had a thing for sleeping in Nico's bed, and who was Nico to tell him not to? Especially if it meant Nico could sleep beside him. "I haven't hung out with you outside of school in forever."

How could he say it? How could he say, "I'm in love with you, dumbass. But if I tell you you'll just run away and never want to talk to me again?" without bursting out into tears and shaking and sobbing uncontrollably? There was no way, so he said, "Nothing, really. I've just been hanging out at home." Which was true, but he'd been avoiding Percy. It was easier if he just didn't see him, if he couldn't smell him, if he couldn't feel that heat radiating off of him, or hear those hilariously adorable snores emitting from him, it was just easier if he didn't have to wonder what flavor his lips were. But the scent of Percy wafted over to him as the young man resettled on the bed, feet facing the headboard and his head at the foot of the bed where Nico sat.

"That's boring. Annabeth and I hardly ever see you man," Nico didn't let that bother him, Annabeth was Percy's girl, of course he would include her.

"Wanna play Black Ops?" Nico asked suddenly trying to distract him, he needed something mindless, something loud, something to occupy that part of Percy's brain that allowed him to ask questions and to say things that Nico would regret.

"Sure," Percy said and he smiled widely. "I hear it's good,"

"Yeah," Nico agreed and popped in the disc. He didn't have a lot of things, but his PS3 had been a surprise Christmas/Birthday/hope-this-tides-you-over-till-a-couple-years-from-now gift from his Dad and he was thankful for it, his TV wasn't too terribly small so it did in a pinch to distract Percy. Which is what Nico used it for mostly, occasionally he would get the urge to use his console, but he found himself reading more often than naught.

So he sat there, his knee slightly touching Percy's side, and he was very aware of it. The heat from that one connecting spot seemed to radiate from his brunet friend to his entire body, he barely noticed the killing, instead watching out of his peripherals. Percy's glorious tangle of almond brown curls, his coffee colored eyes moving back and forth from watching the screen, he had a long Mediterranean face, but then again so did Nico, which was dusted in freckles. Then his eyes would travel further down to his back, which was slightly defined, and the supple curve of his backside that Nico knew if he reached out and grabbed would feel like warm steel. But he was a teenager, both of them seventeen (Nico just newly turned), so sex was a topic that seemed to stay on his mind. He got…urges, ones which he ignored for the most part. Like reaching out and grabbing a handful of Percy's ass, that was a no-no. But Percy was allowed to throw an arm over Nico's knee and use his leg as a pillow, that was fine. Nico knew from experience that sometimes he took his own touch a little too far. Like, say, if he was leaning against Percy his head might gradually find its way into the nook between the older teen's arm and chest, where he would receive a quizzical stare from Percy, who would laugh and push Nico away.

He suffered through the minutest of touches and as protocol dictated kept his erection at a minimum simply through sheer force of will, a most difficult thing for any man to do, let alone one as inexperienced as Nico. An hour passed and the talking was kept brief, a few comfortable words between best friends, but the silence was mostly welcomed, Nico never had anything to talk about either way, but Percy could go on for hours about nothing.

"Oh, did I tell you, I got my fuel injector replaced, just in time to, my old one was on its last leg," Percy said through a mouthful of cookies that Nico had brought in the room for him, for Percy specifically, Nico hardly ever partook, just watching the brunet eat was enough to keep him tided over till dinner was done.

"Oh, yeah?" Nico wondered, not interested really, but Percy hardly ever noticed that lack of enthusiasm in his voice, or if he did he pretended he didn't. Percy went on about his car, he fancied himself a mechanic sometimes, which was a silver '00 Sonata that Percy's mother and her husband Paul had bought for him when he turned sixteen. Nico just listened on without ever really hearing a word Percy was saying, he tended to zone out when Percy went into report mode.

"You listening?" Nico blinked.

"What?"

Then the brunet laughed. "You were so gone, I asked if you wanted to play two players?"

"I—er—yeah, sure." He got up and got another controller, and they began co-op, killing terrorists and other bad men right and left and a small part of Nico wondered what it would be like playing from the other side, both believed that what they were fighting for was the most just cause, so who was to say he was the hero in this story? But then he saw Percy's lips were moving and he had to turn his brain back on. "Sorry, what?"

Again Percy laughed, and it was like nectar for the soul, Nico felt himself growing hotter. "God, I love you man, but you have got to start listening." Percy smiled, and Nico felt a pang of loneliness stab at him, no matter how close his unrequited was he was always so very far away, Nico couldn't reach out and touch and expect a good response, couldn't say how he felt because he knew it would blow up in his face. "I said whatever your Dad is cooking it smells good."

Nico sniffed the air, sure enough he could smell garlic rolls and pasta, a home favorite. "Yeah, he's a good cook." He relented.

"How come you don't cook more?" Nico wondered how best he should answer that, he could in fact cook, as long as it had a recipe, but he couldn't do it from memory like his Dad. He had, in fact made, food for himself and the guy leaning against him, but it had been just simple eggs and bacon and toast.

"Dad does it better," Nico decided. "I cook if he's not up to it, sometimes he comes home from work and just doesn't want to do anything but eat, shower, and go to bed." Nico laughed as Percy shivered, Hades worked in a morgue—well, he owned a funeral home actually, but when there wasn't a lot to take care of there he worked in a few morgues. Hence the nickname. It had always been sort of an added creep-o factoid that made Percy unease around him. Nico put his hand on Percy's arm absently, but pulled away instead and grabbed his controller again, resuming the massacre. After a long while of silence Nico realized he wasn't being much of a host. The entire time Percy had been there he hadn't made the conscious effort to talk to him, it came with being alone all the time though, you get used to not having to be courteous towards others. "How are things with you and Annabeth?" He asked as he zip-lined down a mountain, time slowing down on the screen and allowing him to shoot several of his enemies all at once. Percy didn't answer, which caused Nico to look over at him. "Perce?"

"We're…not doing the best," Percy finally said and Nico's heart fluttered. Percy and Annabeth, the universe's star couple were 'not doing the best?' It was something that Nico knew he couldn't be outwardly happy about, he held his indecipherable expression up, if only just by a fraction.

"Why's that?" He asked, sounding concerned and he wanted to put a comforting hand on Percy's shoulder but they were already so close, if he was tempted anymore he wasn't sure he'd be able to control himself.

"We—just a stupid fight. It's our last year going to high school and she wants to go to some dumb school all the way in California—" He sighed, then he looked up "not that there's anything wrong with California," he added. California was Nico's home state, they'd moved out to New York for his mom's family, but her parents had passed away a long time ago now. "And I don't want her to go because she'll be so far away and there are plenty of schools here, right?" Nico nodded. "Right. It's just stupid! It's like she doesn't even want us to be together."

"I'm sure that's not the case," Nico said and turned his eyes down to Percy. He hated that when Percy looked at him he never really saw him, but then again no one ever truly saw him because he didn't let them, but Percy was supposed to be his best friend, he was supposed to want to console Nico, even if the moody teen never really wanted to talk about it, it would have been nice if he tried.

"Yeah, I hope. Anyway," Percy continued. "It's just a dumb argument, I hope she texts me later or something. If I text her she just gets mad at me all over again, but if I don't she tells me I should have texted her."

"Girls." Nico laughed ironically, an odd mirth to just that one word, and the smile that tugged at his lips was out of place, but it looked nice, no matter how snarky. Percy didn't hear the sarcasm though, he never heard the sarcasm unless Nico's words were drowning in it.

"Right?" He asked and killed another enemy. "Speaking of girls, I hear Rachel Elizabeth Dare is into you, you should talk to her." He sat up and immediately Nico missed the warmth of Percy's head on his leg. "She's hot."

"I suppose she is," Nico didn't turn to look at the brunet, instead he kept advancing in the level. "Not really my type though."

"Type?" Percy laughed. "Man, she's so cute, it, like, breaks all type molds."

Nico raised an eyebrow. "How would Annabeth feel about hearing you say that?" He said with a chuckle and immediately Percy's face burned red.

"That's beside the point, Nico," He said, flustered. "Where's your phone? I'm texting Rachel."

"Percy!" Nico jumped when Percy tackled him to the bed, his deft fingers feeling around inside of Nico's pockets and causing the raven haired young man to squirm around beneath him. Now, Nico liked his room. It was a dark burgundy color with very low lighting and black curtains to block out too much sun from coming in, his walls were lined in posters of bands like Alice in Chains, Behemoth, Pantera, Trivium, System of a Down, and Slipknot and tons more and there were a bunch of sci-fi novels lining his shelves. He had a kick-ass lava lamp that sat on the floor and threw colors all around, there was a single ceiling fan because it tended to get stuffy, and his bed—which was a full—was covered in pillows, but there was one drawback to his room.

It was had incredibly thin walls, and Nico had one weakness—he was horribly ticklish. So when Percy began searching his person Nico became a fit of uncharacteristic giggles, of course, Percy knew about this particular weakness and used it to his advantage in search of the phone. One hand running up his bony side while the other restrained his arms, and the brunet was grinning down evilly all the while, chuckling at Nico's uncontrollable laughter. Nico had two problems, one: he was hating how his self control was waning, and two: his door had just swung open. His father stood there, staring down at the scene with what Nico hoped was apathy, the mask was hard to read. He'd just walked in on his seventeen year old son being restrained and straddled AND tickled by his best friend, admittedly it was a compromising position.

"Dinner's ready," Hades said. "Wash up." Then he turned and casually walked out of the room.

Percy crawled off of him, his face slightly flushed, and Nico threw a pillow at him. "Jackass." He said, then he pushed past Percy and walked to the bathroom. He hated being tickled, Percy also knew that.

"What?" The brunet said with a sly smile. "If you would've just given me your phone I wouldn't have had to take drastic measures." They walked to the bathroom and Nico washed his hands, Percy right behind him. "You know I'm spending the night?"

"D'jya call your mom this time?" Nico asked, Percy had a habit of spending nights over at his house without ever calling Sally, his mother.

"Ah I'm sure she knows where I am by now." Percy said with a brilliant smile and Nico flicked water on him.

"Call her," He said and walked past him just as he dug his phone out and dialed the number, he heard the greeting and shook his head. Nico walked into the living room which was pretty standard, couch, loveseat, television, coffee table, and into the kitchen. His Dad was sitting at the table, a plate of niciose salad in front of him with a small amount of Italian dressing dusting the green, green leaves, there was a bowl of salmon and spinach fettuccine on the table, seated next to another bowl of buttery garlic rolls.

"Son," He said when he saw Percy wasn't behind him. "we have to talk." Nico sighed, he figured this would happen.

"What's up?"

"First off, that's a horrible way to find out news and is a lazy way of speaking," Hades said, well, his real name was Thomas, but that was much too formal, and Hades suited him so much better than Tom, or Tommy—he was built like a Greek god, he had the dark hair and eyes, he even called the mortuary he worked at the Underworld, but that was a joke between himself and his son.

"Sorry," Nico said.

"It's about Percy," Hades continued. "Is he—are you two in a relationship?" Nico's face burned and he took a seat next to his Dad at the table, the man had set the table as always with an extra space for Percy.

"No Dad," He said. "we're most definitely not."

"But you like…boys, don't you?" He asked and Nico looked into his father's face, he was a handsome man, his skin was the same color as papyrus paper, and his rugged salt-and-pepper beard felt like bristles. His onyx colored eyes were soft and filled with anxiety, the anxiety of wondering how he was going to keep his bills paid, how he was going to keep food—healthy food—on the table, how he was going to send his son to college, and then on top of all that, worry that his son might be homosexual.

"Do you really want to have this conversation yet?" Nico asked, turning away from those dark eyes that looked exactly like his. "Just wait for Percy to go home and we'll talk."

"So you two aren't—"

"No, Dad." Nico said for the second time. "And we never will be." Then his father did something he didn't suspect, he put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed it.

"Don't beat yourself up about it, kid." He said and offered him a very small smile, which Nico returned to the best of his ability.

"I called her," Percy said emerging into the kitchen with damp hands. "Happy, Nico?"

"Very," Nico said, forcing a chuckle and avoiding his father's weighty glance, instead piling some salad onto a plate and handing it to Percy, then some onto a saucer of his own. "Looks good, Dad."

"Yeah," Percy smiled, digging into the salad. "I love your cooking Mr. di Angelo." Hades smiled offhandedly at that for a minute.

"Thank you, Percival," He said, oh he knew Percy's name, but he just didn't care to ever say it.

"Actually its short for Perseus." Percy said. "Dad named me"

"Mm." Hades replied, but his mood wasn't because he was mean or irritable, well he was irritable, but that wasn't the case at this moment. His son, his son very obviously had an infatuation with Percy Jackson, and though he wouldn't meddle in his offspring's affairs it didn't mean he had to be happy about it. "You know," He said. "There was a boy your age in the morgue today,"

"Oh?" Nico asked. "Why? School project? You didn't freak him out did you Dad?"

"Does that sound like me?" Hades asked. "No, no. He was there much the same reason all the bodies come through—he was dead." Suddenly the sound of silverware hitting a plate was in the air, Percy looked green.

"Dad," Nico said. "You know he hates stuff like that."

"Sorry," Hades smiled. "I couldn't resist. I'm only kidding, he was there for a report," Dinner continued on much the same way, and eventually Percy was able to finish his salad, Nico took his plate and spooned fettuccine onto it. He wondered how Percy hadn't thought that there weren't many people's friends who would do stuff like this for them. "You want a drink?" he asked.

"Uh…got any Coke?" Nico stood up and went to their fridge and he brought out a canned Coca-Cola. He grabbed his dad one too and brought them back to the table. They finished eating not long after that and Percy helped him wash and put the dishes away, then they made their way back to Nico's room, where luckily the topic of girls wasn't brought back up. Instead they switched over to playing Resistance 2, both games Nico had borrowed from Percy, his Dad had been kind enough to supply him with a few sports games, and one racing one, but he wasn't very much into either.

They switched over to watching Family Guy soon after that—Percy had the seasons on DVD. "I remember when these used to be funnier," Nico laughed as Peter carried on in his childish manner all about the fictional town of Quaohog.

"Hey, season nine redeems the really bad episodes," Percy defended, he actually really enjoyed the series.

"You what cartoon is funny? The Simpsons." Nico continued. "Everything not done by Matt Groening is pretty dumb," But he smiled because he knew how Percy would react.

"Really? You wanna get into this again?" Percy asked, it wasn't the first time they'd had the argument.

"I'm just sayin—" But he was cut off midsentence by a pillow tagging him against the cheek. "Oh you did not." He said, standing up with the pillow in his hands. "You know you're dead now don't you?"

"Bring it on," Percy said and whipped his neck to the side, sending his hair out of his face. Thus a pillow fight ensued, and though it didn't last long Nico loved every second of it. Percy had changed into a pair of his Nico's gym shorts that revealed his pale, thinly haired legs and one of his bigger shirts, but Nico didn't have time to worry about the distractions as he ducked another swing and landed a blow of his own. His Dad knocked on the door once. "Keep it down," He said poking his head in the room, so they went back to watching TV, and when that got boring Nico popped in their favorite movie, The Dark Knight, then, lights off, they watched the movie in its entirety. It was great, as always, but Nico couldn't stop his heart from pounding in his chest as Percy leaned against him, it should have been illegal for someone to have such a hold over him, and he couldn't stop himself from situating his body such that it was easier for Percy to do so.

Truly, Percy didn't know he was doing these things to Nico, he didn't know about the young man's infatuation, he didn't know that his mere touch sent licks of flames down his spine, or that Nico wished for more than anything to just hold Percy's hand. He was just incredibly oblivious, and that's how he fell asleep as well, incredibly oblivious. Nico pulled the covers back and tucked Percy in and then he got up and turned off all his electronics, flipped the switch for his fan and crawled into bed right beside his best friend.

Percy was a hard sleeper. The hardest Nico knew, and yet anytime he tried to put an arm around the brunet boy's chest and curl up next to him Percy would wake up slightly, enough to move the arm, turn over in his sleep, and fall back into the dreaming world. It was frustrating. Nico hardly slept when Percy was over, he would sit there and contemplate all the things he could do to the sleeping young man. The thought made him sick and his stomach clenched with loathing, but also with anxiety because it was always so tempting to reach across. Just once. He waited and Percy's light snores turned into a full fledged log sawing competition. Nico's heart beat hard, his entire body throbbed along with it in its quickened pace and adrenaline pumped through his veins. He moved his hand slowly, not that Percy was more than ten inches away from him, but it seemed like entire knots and clicks before he arrived at the side of the sleeping figure. He was thankful that Percy had borrowed the shorts to sleep in. Then, a wave of guilt rushed over Nico. It was wrong to do this to his best friend, to violate his trust like this. But, it was wrong for him having to live with such heartbreak too, every single fucking day, and Nico was full of hormones and lust and urges and most of all love, a very thorny love—it had grown cold in his chest like ice from the years of unrequited pain—and that was soon the only thought he had as his hand ghosted over Percy's crotch.

He groped.

Nico's heart nearly leapt out of his chest from how quickly it was beating now, he could actually feel it in his fingertips and toes, but he couldn't stop. Slowly but surely he kneaded Percy to what he guessed was full mast, touching everything he could and vaguely thinking they were about the same size in length and girth, but Percy was cut differently than he was, as he suspected all cocks looked and felt different. His curiosity could have stemmed from the fact that Nico had never really had very many friends, let alone ones that were boys, so he missed the whole explorative age of childhood, and he was rounding the corner of the explorations of college men, for there seemed to be a lull in time when it was appropriate to explore such things: just out of toddlerhood and your college years. There weren't any real words to describe Nico's yielding elation, of course this was wrong, so wrong, but his loneliness outweighed his reason and his conscious. He could feel regret in his gut like a hot knife, but he was here now, he was doing this and there was no way he could stop, even if he wanted to. He only wished he could slip his hand underneath the elastic waistband of both the shorts and Percy's boxers, but he had no such luck as surely something like that—direct skin-to-skin contact—would awaken Percy.

He got his fill of his ministrations and pulled his hand back, finding that his arm's journey back to him was a lot quicker than its voyage out to Percy, who turned over in his sleep, and Nico sighed heavily. This was as close to ever being intimate with Percy as he was going to get. He scooted closer carefully across the bed and put an arm around Percy's waist tentatively. Then he fell asleep, feeling even hollower than before.

Touch.