A/N: Disclaimer; I do not own One Piece.

Out of all the short stories I was planning on writing, this one spontaneously appeared and I decided to write it. It may become a series of no-deep planning and inconsistent chapter updates.

Oh well. I hope you are ok with anything (warning).

Enjoy.

A red haired man kept fumbling with his hair as he approached a huge facility. The bangs were getting in the way and he regretted not putting it up with gel as usual.

Kid then I looked up at the hospital in front of him. It was a huge white facility with numerous glass doors and windows. From its transparent walls, he was able to see doctors, nurses, and patients walking about from the outside.

Kid looked down to his right hand, a paper bag with Law's lunch inside. Kid had prepared it earlier today after he got better from a light cold. He was too bored after he woke up feeling better and decided that he should surprise Law with his homemade lunch.

He should still be here and not at the campus today. Kid thought to himself as he made his way to the receptionist. He quickly asked where Law was and the kind nurse suggested Kid to wait at his office.

Through numerous doors and stairs, Kid finally got to Law's office.

However, the room was vacate. It had a couple stuffed bookshelves and two desks in the room. One of the desks had some sort of beverage in its great green bottle. There were four chairs and a brown leather love seat couch. He then spotted a familiar backpack on one of the chairs. It was a dark blue backpack with a small white polar bear keychain attached to its zippers. Once confirming that it looks like Laws, he took a seat on the chair next to the backpack.

On the desk in front of him, he saw papers with Law's handwriting scribbled everywhere. Kid took a peek behind him, comparing the other desk. That desk had papers with a different handwriting.

Guess he's sharing the office. Kid thought to himself. Then he noticed that the great green bottle was on Law's desk. He took the bottle by the neck and analyzed it.

It was a bottle of some sort of alcohol.

What. Is he drinking or something? Kid sneered to himself jokingly- until he saw a half-full shot glass next to it.

Eh. Kid froze as he saw the slightly tinted yellow liquid in the shot glass.

"...Drinking during working hours?"

No, that can't be. Kid convinced himself. Maybe leftover alcohol from afterwork? -But really, in a hospital?

Kid stared at it for a while, then a thought lit up.

I'll just drink this up. He won't even notice. Kid took up the glass between his fingers. Wonder how this'll taste? I mean, he has a full bottle. He wouldn't mind me taking this one right?

He took a sniff- it smelled a bit floral. Then took the shot.

The liquid tingled and burned in his mouth and his throat.

"-man, this thing's stronger than vodka!" Kid exclaimed as he tried to shake some heat away. He then placed the shot glass to its original position and wondered if Law would even notice the contents missing.

Then he remembered Law talking about one of his drawers filled with his stash junk.

I think it was the 'middle' drawer... The desk had only one drawer on the left side (since the rest of the area was occupied for the chair) and three drawers on the right. Kid opened the middle drawer on the right.

The drawer only had one unopened energy bar and one bag of potato chips tightly closed with a clip.

...Hmm. There's barely any food left. Kid inspected. He then looked into the paper bag with Law's lunch and other snacks he brought. Kid took out all the snacks he packed for Law and himself into the drawer. He should notice this one. He snickered.

After that, he just waited for Law patiently. After about a half an hour, he looked at his wristwatch. It was already past one.

I hope he didn't grab a lunch somewhere already. Kid thought for a brief moment. But then, his backpack's (plus wallet) still here, so he couldn't have gotten lunch yet. He stared at his watch for a while.

-and then the numbers blurred. Kid shook his head and looked around the room. Some parts looked blurred. Then nausea hit him.

Fuck. I thought I got better. Kid grumbled to himself. Or maybe because he was getting hungry too? He had decided to eat the brought lunch with Law and hadn't had anything since breakfast.

Just when Kid was debating whether to eat some chips from Law's stash, the office door swung open.

"-...!? Eustass-ya?" Law spoke after a brief bewilderment. "Why are you here? Shouldn't you be in bed?"

"...I was feeling better and decided to have lunch with you." Kid said with some uncertainty as another cloud of nausea came upon him.

"...You don't look that great." Law said without hesitating.

"...I was." Law came up to him and held Kid's face with both hands. His cold fingers gave Kid some spine chills, but it immediately felt really nice. His hands crawled down to his neck, then his right moved to his forehead.

"Mmm. You still feel kinda warm."

"Really? I did check the temperature and it was down before I came in." Kid informed while Law moved his backpack to the floor to take a seat. Law noticed the paper bag in his hand and Kid, seeing his eyes on it, brought it to his face.

"Thank you for preparing my lunch." Law smiled as he took the paper bag with both hands. "Now you can go home and rest."

"-Wait, no!" Kid said as he pulled the lunch away from Law's grasp. "Let's eat together!"

"You really don't look that great." Law repeated. "Plus you have a mild fever. Go home and rest."

"-But I took a sick leave to see you working at the hospital."

"You took a sick leave because you have a fever." Law pointed out. "Now you should go home and rest before your condition worsens and is forced to use up your other sick leaves."

"Come on, I came all the way here. Plus, I'm hungry." Kid peered into Law's face. "Can we eat lunch together?"

"...Go straight home after this ok?" Law sighed and moved Kid's bangs away from his forehead and kissed his forehead softly. "...Yeah. Man, I think it's raising."

"Mm." Kid smiled as he felt Law's cool lips. "Don't know why but it just got worse. Maybe I got too hungry."

"Then you should have snacked on some of my junk. I told you about my snack drawer right?" Law scooted towards his desk and slid it open. He froze for a moment as there were more snacks. "..." Kid watched Law in anticipation wondering if he would say anything about it. "-uh, so yeah, I had these chips ope-"

"I added more stuff to it." Kid cut him off.

"-ahh. Ok. That makes sense. I was wondering when I brought more in." Law lightly laughed to himself.

"Since you're already here, we can just eat the lunch I prepared." Kid smiled. In reply, Law closed the hatch without taking anything out.

"Yeah. Thanks for that." Law thanked again. "We can just eat here- ah, but first let me move these..." Law looked up at his desk full with papers. But before moving any of the papers in front of him, his hand reached the shot glass first- then paused. "...Wait. Why's this empty."

"Whaaat? You noticed that? I thought you wouldn't notice since you barely realized the snacks!" Kid laughed.

"-Wait. Seriously. Why is this empty?" Law's eyebrows slowly knotted together. Kid stopped laughing and wondered if he was gonna get mad.

"Come on, you still have a whole bottle."

"I got this today. See?" Law grabbed the bottle on it's neck and brought it to Kid's eyes. "I haven't even broken the seal since I was gonna take this home to drink it with you." Law placed the bottle back on the desk. "Plus, I don't drink at work." Kid's face dropped to his 'oops' face.

"...Sorry." Kid started. Law looked at him in confusion. "I emptied it out."

"-You, what?!" Law stood up and shouted with frustration. "Why'd you do that for-"

What was he upset about? Kid wondered.

"Well, I thought it was the stuff from that bottle and thought you wouldn't mind if I drank it, but I didn't expect you to be-"

"WHAT." Law interrupted Kid. Kid stopped his words in his tracks. He cautiously looked up at Law with regret. An argument wasn't what he was looking forward to. But Kid saw Law's brow unravel from anger to initial surprise. Kid stared at him in confusion.

"Wait, wait. WHAT." Law asked.

"I'm sorry I drank it." Kid apologized.

"Wait, you drank it?!" Law's eyebrows knotted together again, but his eyes were round with shock. He moved his left hand over to cover his mouth- which was a horribly forced frown to cover up the smile that grew wider and wider. Kid saw that and became a bit concerned. "-you..."

Then Law burst into a fit of laughs. Kid gaped at him as he laughed until he choked on his own saliva. Law's face turned all red from the the short breaths.

"...Uh...What happened?" Kid asked. Law sat down again, stabilized his breaths and took a long deep one before he composedly spoke to Kid.

"That wasn't alcohol." Law calmly stated with a smile.

"I... think I got that." Kid said with uncertainty. "What was it?"

"One of my patient's urine sample."

"What." Kid's eyes grew while his tongue started shriveling with disgust.

"You drank sample piss from one of my patients."

"Holy fucking shit." Kid cursed full with distaste. "I drank piss?!"

"Don't worry, drinking urine is common practice amongst people with golden shower fetishes." Law tried to reassure Kid.

"That still disgusts me!" Kid yelled. "I just drank who-knows-fuck's urine?! If it was you, I would've thought about it, but-"

"-Don't think about it. I don't have that fetish and that'll create a whole mess." Law broke him off and glared at him.

"Anyways, why the fuck did you have that thing in a shot glass on your desk!?"

"Well, I needed to check the patient's condition and figure out what he was diagnosed with. The reason-"

"Wait, he has some sort of sickness?"

"Well, duh. We don't collect people's piss for entertainment."

"...Am I ok drinking it?" Kid inquired after a brief pause. Law eyed Kid.

"Of course not. It's a bio hazard." Law stated clearly. "But you won't die. The sickness isn't also one that is fatal either." Kid paled and felt extremely sick.

"I feel like shit."

"You look like shit." Law observed. "I think we should treat you." He got on his heels and grabbed Kid's wrists, yanking him to get up. "How long was it since you drank that thing?"

"...Don't know... Fifteen, maybe thirty minutes?" Kid managed to get on his feet and allowed himself to be dragged by Law. They were out in the hallway. Law let go one of his wrist, allowing Kid to walk without trouble, but still held his right one steadfastly. Kid followed him without asking further questions until they got into a small room.

The room had sparkling clean gray walls and tiles. The smell of some sort of sanitizer whiffed the air. Kid stared at the mirror in front of him as he entered. The mirror had sharp straight edges and cloned Kid perfectly. It sat right above a white sink. Law yanked him in and locked the door. Kid stood right in front of the white ceramic.

A toilet.

"Ok. We should get that out of your system before it digests completely into your body." Law declared.

"...Wait, does this mean-"

"You can induce yourself to vomit right?" Law reached the wall cabinet which hung across from the toilet and took out some gloves just in case. "Or should I help you?"

"Do I have to throw up?"

"I know it's a dreadful experience, but it may make you feel better." Law smiled as he lift the seat cover for him.

With great hesitation, Kid slowly got down to his knees in front the white bowl.

"-Isn't there a etiquette bag or something instead of the toilet?" Kid asked as he looked down at it.

"This is easier to clean and those things aren't necessarily near our offices." Law explained. "It's pretty clean. Only doctors use this one during their break time- if they ever have one. Otherwise, it's pretty unuse-" Law abruptly stopped his tongue and dropped the gloves on the tiles. Kid wondered what was up and glanced at him. Law's eyes fixed around Kid's back.

Then Kid felt a surge of heat burning through his bones.

"Aagh!?" Kid grunted in pain as it increased. He looked at his hands and they were steaming. Shocked, Kid glanced at Law, who snapped his gaze off from the gas emitting from Kid's back and met Kid's eyes.

"-Fuck! What the hell's going on!?" Law screamed as panic struck them. Law's chest filled with confusion and concern, but one thing was clear in his head:

I have to get the rest out of his body- even if it may be too late already.

Law snapped his tongue as he glared at the gloves he dropped on the ground. Then he quickly went by Kid's side and violently grabbed Kid's un-gelled fluffy red hair, pulling it back.

"Wait, whaf-" Kid started protesting, but Law slipped his fingers in his mouth at the right moment. He reached into the back of his mouth and rubbed it aggressively to trigger the gag reflex. "Urrgl...!" Kid moaned and Law withdrew his left hand from his mouth and thrusted his head towards the toilet. Kid immediately emptied his stomach. As Kid continued to throw up and choke, Law rubbed his back.

"...Fuck." Kid wheezed between his breath, "I don't think I can ever drink vodka ever again."

"...What are you talking about?" Law spoke with concern as he eyed the steam he was emitting. Before Law could ask if he was getting better, Kid screamed in pain. He clamped his eyes tight as he felt his whole body burn. Law stopped rubbing his back as more gas emitted Kid's body.

Kid concentrated on his breathing to reduce the pain he felt. As the pain subsided, he wiped off the sweat pouring down his temple and took a peek at Law.

Then, he did a double take at Law.

Law stared down at him with bulging eyes and parted lips. He looked like a horrible shock of lightning hit him.

Then Kid noticed how far Law's face was... and how big the toilet felt. There was a long triangle getting on his view and he tried to move it away. It wouldn't go away as he shook it and so he tried touching it- it was a part of his nose. Dumbfounded, he patted his whole face and looked down on himself. And saw how he was in a pile of his own clothes.

Alarmed, he rushed to see his own reflection using the white wall- the side of the toilet. Kid could see something rustling behind him and he grabbed it- it was a bushy tail that belonged to him.

Kid had turned into a small strange being.

A/N:

So, this will hopefully be comedy- I needed a break from some of the darkness from 'Murder'.

I hope you enjoyed it.