It's All About Trust (a post 6x15 spoiler fic)
A/N: I've decided to write this little fic after seeing sneak peek #2 for episode 6x15. My mind kept going to Killian and how he'd feel if he knew Emma had packed his things after his disappearance. The events happen some time after 6x15 or in any case, after Killian's return. I hope no one takes offence at this, I'm a fan of both Emma and Killian, and I'm not overly worried about how the episode will end. Hopefully there aren't many mistakes in this, but I warn you it is unedited. Enjoy!
They're eager to get back home, to have a glass of wine and maybe relax in front of the TV for a bit before retiring for the evening. She's attached to his elbow and it's the most homey feelings she's ever felt. But then, he's always made her feel this way, even when she was fighting with all her might against the idea of "them".
As soon as they enter through the front door, Emma's eyes fall on Killian's chest. It's still beside the couch, where she'd left it. She looks at it guiltily. "Maybe he won't see it" pops into her head, but she's not that lucky.
She knows the minute he notices it, because his muscles grow tense beneath her hand. He just stands there looking at it for a few seconds and his silence makes her grow weary. She'd like to tell him she's sorry. That she's still afraid to be left alone, even after everything. But that it has nothing to do with him. "Killian…", she starts, trying to figure out how to tell him everything that's on her mind at the moment.
He looks at her then, and the words get stuck in her throat. He's looking at her with such a hurt look in his eyes, like a puppy that's been kicked by his beloved master, and her heart clenches. It lasts but a second, because he closes his eyes then. He still doesn't say anything; just takes a few steps inside their living room, sighing heavily.
She wants to go to him. To ask him for forgiveness. She knows he had planned to leave, to find himself - he'd told her everything that happened to get him trapped on board the Nautilus - but he'd changed his mind. He'd always changed his mind in regards to her. No matter what, he'd always come back, he'd put her first on countless occasions. And her first reaction (and second and third, if she were perfectly honest with herself) after she'd noticed him gone, was to believe he'd left. She takes a first step towards him.
"Don't." He doesn't turn towards her, but he passes his hand through his hair nervously. "I know why you'd think I'd abandoned you - bloody hell, I was expecting you to - but, Emma, I hoped you'd see to the man inside like you've done so many times before."
His words cut like a blade through her; she's never been actually hurt by a sword before, but she imagines it would actually hurt less. And the worst thing is that he's right. After she'd gotten over her trust and abandonment issues, she'd seen the truth.
He sighs again. "I know why you did it and it's alright, Emma. I understand."
His reassurances don't have the intended effect, though. It just makes her feel even worse because he's always been so understanding and gentle with her.
He turns towards her then and closes the distances between them. He cups her cheek then, wiping an errant tear away. His eyes turn gentle, then: "It really is alright, Emma, I understand." His thumb brushes her cheekbone in a soothing caress, then he steps back. "I'll be in the shed for a bit, love. I … I need to put some order in my thoughts."
She doesn't stop him as he leaves through the back door. It kills her that she's once again done this to him. And not a few days ago she'd stood there berating him for letting old fears overcome him. Some fine example she is. A regular case of the pot calling the kettle black.
No more. She'll never let those thoughts get the better of her. Not where Killian is concerned. Next time her demons will decide to play with her, she'll think of this day and what it's meant for them. Killian deserves her trust - her absolute trust.
Sighing, she bends over to grab the chest. She'll put all his things back before he comes back. And she'll cook his favourite dinner. And maybe later she'll sooth all his hurt in other, more enjoyable, ways, too.