First off, explanation time: I decided to start posting the odd drabbles/ficlets I do on tumblr to here again. Except this time, I'm not going to end up deleting them because I've accepted that pretty much no one is actually going to read them and/or like them. If there's prompts, I'll post them along with the fic. Characters will also be updated to reflect the most recent chapter, or at least the summary will be.

Secondly, I decided to start with some LaLu because why not? This particular one was sitting in my ask box for three months before I finally finished it, so yay for that.

Any who, no one reads these, so let's just get onto the story. I'll keep author's notes minimal for these ones.

Prompt: "I'm going to need you to take these laxatives in order to deal with that emotional constipation of yours" + LaLu? - itsajoshyboy

Laxatives for Laxus

Lucy had accepted that Laxus wasn't typically one for wearing his heart on his sleeve long before they'd started dating.

She'd accepted that he wasn't going to be the type of man to take her out on extravagant, spur of the moment dates; or bring her flowers whenever he returned from a mission with the Raijinshuu; or even tell her that he loved her just because he could.

When they went to Freed and Evergreen's wedding and he didn't so much as hug either of them and express how happy he actually was deep down - really, really, really deep down… Well, Lucy accepted that too, and thought, 'Well, maybe he's just not a weddings guy.' He certainly wasn't a marriage guy either, as far as Lucy knew; he'd flat out told her he didn't want to be married to her after four fucking months together. (And of course, that event had been a complete disaster and Laxus had quickly realised the mistake of his words when Lucy had run off in tears thinking that Laxus really hated her.)

And when Lucy told him she was finally pregnant, after a year of trying, and when all Laxus did was pick her up and give her an almost bone-crushing hug, kissing the spot where her neck met her shoulder while just fucking standing there in the middle of their bathroom - Lucy once again accepted the fact that Laxus just wasn't one for expressing his emotions, even if it really did hurt her that time.

But there were only so many times Lucy could accept that Laxus was a total assface most of the time. And when Laxus didn't so much as smile when their daughter finally said her first proper word one afternoon during playtime - which also did happen to be 'Dada' - Lucy knew she had reached the final straw. So after trying not to cry tears of happiness over her daughter's language development, Lucy quickly shot up from the lounge, grabbed her keys and purse, told Laxus she'd be back shortly, and walked out the door.

Twenty minutes later, Lucy was walking back into the cosy home she shared with the grumpy dragon slayer, and then tossing a small box she'd picked up from the pharmacy to him for it to land on his chest and distract him from the show on the lacrima-vision.

"Oi, what's this?" Laxus grumbled as his fingers fumbled with the edges of the box to pick it up and examine it.

Lucy merely ducked down to pick up her daughter before answering as she walked back towards the stairs, "I'm going to need you to take those laxatives for that emotional constipation of yours." Because really, the guy must've been backed up to the extreme.

Laxus opened his mouth to shout a response (maybe tell the other blonde where she could put the damn laxatives), but quickly closed it again when he realised that he didn't even have a response. So he just scoffed under his breath and sunk into his comfortable lounge once again, turning his attention back to the show in front of him.

Moments later though, Laxus couldn't help but pick up the box of laxatives on his chest again to read the directions on the back of it, glancing over his shoulder every few moments just to make sure Lucy didn't catch him and be given a reason to be annoyingly smug.