Now I See Daylight

(I Only See Daylight)

Epilogue

6 years later

"Mrs. Grant?"

The soft, slight squeaking of the dry erase marker faded as Olivia's hand paused on the board. Capping the purple marker, she turned to face the classroom behind her. A soft breeze flitted through the room, having found its way through the open window, and tugged on the bottom of her white, knee-length dress. Her gaze settled on the fourteen year old in the front - her long, blonde hair hanging in two braids.

"Yes, Rebecca?"

"When are our essays due?"

Olivia tried not to laugh at the groans that followed Rebecca's question. She knew a few of her students were avoiding the inevitable and didn't want to discuss the end of term essay that was replacing their exam. With a smile and a shake of her head, Olivia responded:

"Friday -" Raising her hands, she gestured for the class to quieten as even more groans echoed in the room "-after break. I want all of you to have fun next week. World history can wait."

The excited shouts and calls of gratitude put a smile on Olivia's face. Tucking her short, curled hair behind her ear, she once more asked the class to quiet down and return to their assignment. Uncapping her marker, she turned her back to the class and resumed her writing on the board. It was only Wednesday - they still had two more days of classes and Friday was a short quiz. She wasn't going to give them any homework over break (though she had a sneaking suspicion Rebecca would be working on that essay), but it didn't mean that she was going to take it easy before break.

Olivia's hand paused on the board as the bell began ringing. Capping her marker and laying it on the tray under the board, she turned to watch as her students began packing their things. It was the last class of the day, but they knew better than to start packing before the bell rang or she gave them permission. Olivia ran a tight ship, but despite that she was one of the favourites amongst the students.

"See you tomorrow, Mrs. Grant."

"Have a good evening, Teegan."

"Bye, Mrs. Grant!"

"Do me a favour and do your homework tonight, Troye," Olivia called after the redhead. As the last of the students trickled out and silence fell over the noisy, bustling hallways, Olivia headed toward her desk. Sitting in her leather chair, she swivelled around to check her email. There was the usual chitter-chatter shared amongst her coworkers - discussing the upcoming break, some recognition someone had received, and asking others to stop leaving their copies on the copier all day. The usual. Exiting out of her email, Olivia opened her gradebook - double-checking all her entries. A moment later, a box began flashing across her computer, reminding Olivia that she had a meeting in five minutes. One of the AP English students had asked to interview her for a final project. A soft knock on the door drew Olivia's attention away from the computer.

"Come in."

The teen entered the room, a notebook cradled in his arm and a pen balanced between his fingers. Olivia smiled at that sight - most of the students would have brought a laptop. Swiveling in her seat and leaning forward, watching as he took a seat across from her desk. Clasping her hands together on her desk, she began speaking.

"Finegan, right?"

"You can call me, Fin."

"Fin it is then." Olivia smiled, clearing her throat. "Miss O'Brien said you wanted to interview me for your final."

"Yeah. It's a book review. She encouraged us to speak to the author if we could."

Olivia bit her lip, glancing down at the papers scattered across her desk. Her gaze slowly slid to the side - landing on a framed photograph of her husband and two little girls. Despite the sinking feeling she felt in her stomach, a soft smile played on her lips. Twisting the diamond ring and golden band on her finger, Olivia took a deep breath. It had been six years since Edison's death and Eric's trial. Four years since she had published her memoir and applied for her teaching license - having finished her Master's of Education while writing her memoir. Damaged had spent weeks atop the New York Times Best Sellers list and given her a piece of fame she had quickly realised she never wanted.

"And you read mine?"

"It was one of our options. Not to sound like a fanboy, but it's amazing. Heartbreaking."

Exhaling sharply, Olivia could feel her heart beginning to beat even faster. That memoir had been the most open she had ever been about her experiences. It was raw. She had spent many a night crying as she typed, but in the end she had been happy that she'd undertaken the task. It had helped her heal in a way she never imagined and paved the way for her future - for her to be able to say yes without hesitation when Fitz proposed.

"What questions did you have?"

"I have ten." Fin paused to rub at the nape of his neck, an embarrassed look crossing his face, "I'm not very good at interviewing. Sorry if the questions are a little...generic."

"That's okay, Fin." Olivia adjusted the Apple Watch on her wrist, the screen lit up to display a photo of the ten week old white Husky that had just joined their family.

"What made you want to write this book?" Fin read from a paper inside his notebook, his finger hovering over the record button on his phone. Olivia smiled at that - a true journalist in the making.

"You've read the book. Why do you think I wrote it, Fin?"

"To heal."

"Yes. That was a dark time in my life. As I mention in the book, things didn't start to look up again until I ran into my husband. I didn't take therapy seriously and I never left my house. Even with therapy and the support I received from my family and friends, healing was...I didn't think I would ever be okay. That book was the final piece. Getting everything off my chest...I felt like I could breathe again."

Fin looked out her for a moment, tilting his head and fixing Olivia with his gaze. A small frown tugged at his lips and he cleared his throat before moving on, reading from his notebook.

"Did you expect the book to be as successful as it was?"

Olivia shook her head. The success of her memoir had come as a huge surprise. To both her, Fitz, and her parents. Staying at the top of the Best Seller's list had been reward enough for her, but then it had won the National Book Award and, later, a Pulitzer Prize. She had had plenty of opportunity to do interviews and more than a handful of offers for movie rights to her book - and had turned every one down. The publicity was something she had never wanted.

"No. There was interest in Edison's case when it went to trial and there was interest in Eric's trial, of course, but I never thought the book would blow up the way it did."

"What was your biggest challenge writing?"

Olivia smirked, shaking her head a bit as she recalled all the arguments she and Fitz had over that book. It made her emotional - she was reliving the greatest trauma of her life while she was writing, but it was also easing her mind. Each page seemed to chase more of the darkness away until, at the end, she was finally left standing in the daylight. Even with the fights she and Fitz had about that book, there was only one thing that had nearly made her quit writing.

"Reliving my worst nightmares."

"I love this weather." Olivia took in a deep breath of the crisp autumn air. Dry leaves crunched under the heel of her brown, knee-length boots.

"It feels amazing." Abby took a sip of her warm coffee, her free hand resting on her rounded abdomen. She had met her husband, Leo, during her final year of law school. Olivia had been as excited as Abby when she'd found out that her best friend was expecting - around the same time that Olivia herself had discovered she was expecting, as well.

"I promised the girls we would carve pumpkins this weekend." Olivia sipped at her own tea. She had cut down on coffee over the years - it only contributed to her terrible sleeping habits.

"How is Fitz handling his alone time with the little terrors?"

"My daughters are not terrors." Olivia gave Abby the side-eye, a faux frown on her face.

"Mackynzie and Madyson are terrors. They took after their aunt Abby afterall." Abby shrugged, a bemused smirk on her face.

"I never did thank you for teaching them that stupid quarter trick." Olivia rolled her eyes, linking her arm with Abby's as they walked down the street.

"I may have been slightly inspired by F.R.I.E.N.D.S."

"Go figure." Olivia chuckled, frowning when she noticed Jake up ahead. "I wish he'd just move away already."

"Hasn't he been moving for years now? You know, since you and Fitz make this such an unbearable place to live and all."

"Shame on us."

"Maybe you shouldn't be assholes."

The two passed Jake in a fit of giggles - their jokes having amused one another. Jake, for his part, did everything he could to look away. He'd been threatened enough by both Eli and Fitz over the years.

"Ow."

"You okay?" Abby turned her head toward her friend.

"Little man has some powerful kicks." Olivia pulled her arm from Abby's, hand going to her stomach and rubbing her ever growing bump. It still wasn't as big as it had been when she was carrying the twins, thankfully.

"Ah. My nephew is a future soccer player."

"His dad was a soccer player."

"Already taking after his dad and being a pain in the ass."

"I thought you liked working with Fitz," Olivia laughed, shaking her head.

"I do, but it's fun giving him hell."

Abby had never stopped working for Fitz. He'd helped her whenever she was having a rough time in law school and, after she had finished and passed the bar, he'd made her a partner at his firm. She was, after all, their unofficial sister.

"Only you." Olivia sighed, slowing to a halt in front of the wrought iron gate. This was the part she hated the most about fall - when she and Abby made their visit to Chris and Francesca. Lowering her gaze, she placed her hand on the cool gate and pulling. Heads down, the two entered the cemetery silently.

"How was school?" Olivia hugged the dark-haired little girl sitting at the kitchen table, a crayon in hand.

"We're learning to read, momma!"

Olivia's attention was drawn across the table to Madyson - a carbon copy of Mackynzie. It had come as a bit of a shock when they found out that they were having twins. The fact that they were identical didn't make it easier. At four, the two had already discovered that they could pass as the other and delighted in tricking their preschool teachers. They hadn't quite succeeded in tricking their parents yet.

"That's awesome!" Olivia ruffled Mackynzie's hair, kissing the top of her head and glancing behind her as she heard the door to the mudroom opening. It wasn't long before Fitz came into view carrying their puppy. He hadn't changed much over the years. His hair had gotten a bit darker and occasionally, like now, he sported a bit of scruff on his face. Olivia thought he looked all the more handsome for it, though.

"She's never going to walk on her leash if you keep carrying her."

"We walked while we were outside. Tell momma she worries too much, Nala." Fitz rubbed his nose against the puppy's before setting her down, watching as she ran toward her water bowl.

"How were the girls?"

"The girls were the girls," Fitz shrugged, ruffling Madyson's hair as he passed behind her chair. "We did our chores, had dinner, played outside some, took our baths and now we're colouring."

"You mean you two were good for daddy?"

"Momma...we're always good for daddy." Mackynzie's serious expression had both her parents in a fit.

"I'll never know how we got so damn lucky."

"Daddy! You sweared!" Madyson's eyes grew big as she stared at her father.

"Oops," Fitz chuckled, "I'll have to put a dollar in the swear jar."

"I'm sure they're happy about that," Olivia laughed. At the end of every week, the girls got to divide whatever money was in the large, Mason jar in the kitchen and save it or spend it on whatever they wanted. They were particular fans of their uncle Eric and grandpa Eli visiting - those weeks always resulted in extra cash. Maya had sworn to Olivia that she thought Eli did it on purpose so the girls would end up with more. He never said more than hell or the occasional damn, either.

"Oh I'm sure they are, too." Fitz halted before Olivia, his hand coming to rest on her stomach - rubbing softly. "How's my little guy?"

"Kicking away."

"Taking after me, then?" Fitz winked.

"You have been a pain in my ass since day one."

"You needed that kick."

"That I did." Olivia's arms went around Fitz's neck, her lips eagerly seeking his out just as a simultaneous shout was heard from the girls at the table, causing the couple to chuckle against each other's lips.

"Swear jar!"

Fin

A/N - Two years of writing is coming to an end. This story was everything to me. I was in such a dark, dark place when I started it and now things have gotten better. They aren't perfect, but life never is and they certainly haven't gone away (you don't get that lucky with Bipolar Disorder), but better is good. Just as Olivia has healed throughout this story, I healed along with her. Writing this story, taking this journey, was what I needed at the time and I am an emotional mess knowing that it's over. I hope all of you have enjoyed this story just as much as I have. Thank you for allowing me to share.

Until next time,

Gabi