"I don't see them," Squall said. "I don't think they're in here."

Xu chuffed and shoved Squall out of the way, put her foot on the lowest shelf and boosted herself up to check for the item in question. He bit back his irritation, leaned back against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest.

Whoever decided to store the extra coffee filters in the third floor maintenance closet was a moron, in Squall's opinion. It was the least logical place for it, and he made a mental note to clear out a space somewhere in the office for caffeinated beverage supplies so that Xu would not have to go without. She was tough to deal with on a good day, but he would rather be forced to endure a full day of Selphie's rambles on Laguna's virtues and let her coat him in glitter than deal with Xu in full-on caffeine deprivation mode.

Someone was going to get hurt if he didn't get at least sixteen ounces of strong coffee in her, stat, and it would probably be him.

"I swear they were here," Xu said. "I saw them last week."

"They're not here now," Squall said. "Let's just get a few from the cafeteria until the order comes in or they turn up."

"I need my coffee now, Leonhart," she said. "And I'm not drinking that sewer sludge they serve downstairs."

"Whatever," Squall said. "Figure it out. Meeting's in ten minutes."

He turned for the door, only to discover it was locked.

He twisted the knob this way and that, frowned and then shook it a little. It didn't budge.

"What's the hold up?"

"Door's locked."

"What do you mean the door is locked?"

"Do you have a different definition for the word locked than I do?" Squall asked.

"Hyne, I have to do everything myself, don't I?"

Xu elbowed her way in front of him, twisted the knob left and right, shook it, and then kicked it hard with the toe of her boot. She kicked it again, let out a wail that was cross between one of Fujin's best howls of pure rage and that of a really pissed off Ruby Dragon.

"Tell me we are not locked in here."

"We're not locked in here."

Her glare was almost as deadly as Quistis' Laser Eye and Squall took a half-step back and scanned the shelves to his left for anything that might help free them.

"Of all the times for you to grow a sense of humor," Xu snapped. "Smart-ass."

Squall grabbed a mallet and a screwdriver from the shelf. If he could knock the pins from the hinges, they could take the door off, locked or not. No big deal.

Except, the hinges were on the outside, like every other maintenance closet in the place. They'd been built that way to allow equipment to be moved in and out without the door interfering.

"You have got to be kidding me," Xu said. "This is not happening. I can not be stuck in a closet with you, of all people!"

"I'm not particularly exited about this either, you know."

"Shut up and give me the mallet," Xu said.

She snatched it from his hand and began to beat on the door with all her might. As if she could beat her way through a solid metal door.

"Let us out!" she yelled. "If someone can hear me, let us out!"

Squall wasn't particularly patient, but in a situation like this, it was best to sit back and wait, no matter how much it sucked to breathe in cleaning chemicals, mildew, and stagnant mop water. When they didn't show up for the meeting, someone would come investigate.

Xu's enraged assault on the door lasted longer than Squall expected. She screamed herself hoarse and in her frustration, beat the doorknob into a misshapen concave that would never work properly again. But try as she might, she couldn't dislodge it from the door, and no one answered their call.

"You about done?" Squall asked. "No one's going to hear you down here, no matter how much noise you make."

The maintenance closet was at the end of the hall and around a corner, next to the emergency stairwell. There were no occupied offices within earshot, and the other rooms in this section consisted of a little-used records storage room, a sound proofed interrogation room, and two empty offices.

"Relax," Squall said. "They'll come looking eventually."

"I doubt it," Xu said and slid down to the floor until she was sitting with her knees to her chest. "They'll just figure you got fed up and split. No one likes me enough to care."

Squall almost told her that wasn't true, but he was hard pressed to think of anyone who actually enjoyed Xu's company besides Quistis. And Quistis was in Deling City on an amnesty mission.

"Well, you can be pretty abrasive."

"You're one to talk," she said. "Oh, wait, you don't."

"I talk," Squall said. "More than I want to. All the time."

"Yeah," Xu said. "About work, to bark orders or ask me why we overspent the budget."

Squall sat next to a stack of boxes full of pine-scented cleaning supplies and frowned.

"I didn't think you cared much about my personal life," Squall said. "You hate Rinoa. And Zell. And pretty much anyone who isn't Quistis, so what the hell do you expect me to say?"

"Dincht needs a mood stabilizer and anger management classes. Tilmitt needs heavy doses of tranquilizers, and Kinneas is a sexual harassment complaint waiting to happen."

Her assessment wasn't exactly off-base, but maybe a little exaggerated. Maybe, just a little.

"And Rin is a Sorceress," he said.

"And Heartilly is a Sorceress," Xu agreed. "It makes no sense, Leonhart. Having her in and out of this place like she isn't the very thing we trained to defeat. It makes even less sense that our Commander is bonded to her and completely refuses to distance himself from her. I mean, for all his spinelessness, at least Cid had the strength and smarts to understand what a conflict of interest it would have been for Edea to hang out like she belonged. You apparently don't."

Squall gritted his teeth but held back the spiteful retort on the tip of his tongue. Xu could not comprehend the depth of what they shared. She had no idea what it meant, or how sending Rinoa away, even if it was for her own good, would rip him apart.

He took a slow, calming breath and counted to ten. It would do no good to snap at her because she wasn't exactly wrong.

"You hate her for reasons beyond her control," Squall says. "That isn't fair."

"Life isn't fair," Xu said, "but then, you wouldn't know much about that, would you?"

Squall was taken aback by her venom. He didn't know what to make of it, and Xu didn't elaborate.

They sat in silence for a while, waiting for the door to open or someone to call out to them or for any sign of life out in the hall.

"If I'm being honest," Xu said, "You're the one I have a problem with."

"...why?"

"You know why," she said. "But I've already said too much, Commander."

Squall wiped a gloved hand over his mouth and sighed.

"You can say it," Squall said.

Xu snorted. "What happens in the closet stays in the closet?"

"Garden Code, article 313," Squall said with a hint of a smile. "Confessions made while involuntarily locked in a maintenance closet are strictly off the record."

She almost smiled and gave him a wry look.

"You sure you can handle it?"

"I handled ten years of Almasy as a roommate and a training partner. I can take it."

"Fine, but you asked for it," she said, then lapsed into silence like she was trying to collect her thoughts. So long, Squall thought maybe she wouldn't say anything. And then:

"You were wildly unqualified to lead Garden, yet you pulled it off even though there were others who had years more training and experience than you did. Do you know how frustrating that is? To work so hard to be recognized, only to see all that recognition go to some kid with a bad attitude and poor social skills for no apparent reason? And then watch him actually succeed when he should have fallen flat on his ass?"

"That was Cid's decision, not mine," Squall said. "I didn't even want it."

"I know," she said. "You didn't want it, and I did. And he didn't even look at me twice. I had seven years of experience in the field, much of that time in a leadership role. You had, what, two missions under your belt? Both of which you failed spectacularly."

Squall pressed his back against the wall and stretched out his legs. There wasn't much room and the soles of his boots hit the bottom shelf across from him. Cans of air freshener toppled onto their sides but Squall didn't bother to set them right again. He was too stunned by Xu's honesty.

"He never told you why," Squall said. "Did he?"

"Cid didn't think I needed to know," she said. "Just gave me some crap line about fate and destiny. As if that was supposed to make me feel like throwing it in your lap was less of an insult than it was."

"He didn't mean it as an insult," Squall said. "The details were classified for a reason, but you'll just have to believe me when I tell you, there was no other option."

Xu snorted again and folded her arms over her knees.

"That's a poor consolation when the rest of us had to stand aside and watch the stars fall on you," she said. "To watch all these cadets and SeeDs look to you for guidance when you don't even want it. The worst part is that you're so good at it, it makes me sick. Even if I was given the shot I deserve, they would never admire me the way they admire you."

"That's what you want?" Squall asked. "Admiration?"

"They don't follow my orders out of loyalty, they do it because they have to. If they don't, they risk your disapproval," she said. "No matter how big a prick you are, they respect you for it. Me? They just call me a bitch behind my back."

Squall considered that for a while as Xu toyed with the laces of her boot.

"I have to work three times as hard for their respect," she said. "Maybe it's because I'm a woman, maybe not. Either way, I shouldn't have to fight so hard for it. I've earned it."

"Maybe you should try not being so rigid," Squall said.

Xu picked up a dry mop head and hurled it at him.

"That is the most sexist thing I've ever heard come out of your mouth, Leonhart," she said. "It's perfectly fine for you to parrot Garden code and bark orders at everyone and basically be an uptight ass all the time, but when I do the same I'm too rigid? No, that doesn't work for me."

"I didn't mean it like that," Squall said.

"The hell you didn't."

He sighed and tossed the mop head aside. As usual, words failed him and he stuck his entire leg in his mouth in front of the one person who could possibly slit his throat while he slept if she really wanted to.

"I meant, you're... Maybe you're trying too hard. You want it so bad, you overcompensate by being three times as tough, even when you don't need to be," he said. "They already respect you. There isn't a cadet here who doesn't know who you are or what you're capable of."

Xu's ire kicked down a notch and she resumed toying with her bootlaces.

"The thing is, when you're overly critical of others," he said, "they tend to return the favor. People are flawed, and they don't particularly enjoy being picked apart for their flaws any more than you do. Criticize the necessary things, and leave the rest alone. Then, maybe people's perception of you will change."

"...is that how people see me?" she asked. "Too critical?"

"For the most part," Squall said. "It think that's what's so off-putting about you. That no one feels like they can do anything right in your eyes. Maybe you don't mean it to come across like that, but it does."

Xu lapsed into silence. She stared at her feet, her shoulders slumped, and she chewed her bottom lip like a scolded child. Squall almost felt bad for being so brutal in his honesty, but he suspected Xu appreciated that more than she would empty reassurances that she was a bitter pill to swallow.

When she didn't say anything in response, Squall re-thought that impression. Beneath the layer of toughness, she was still a person. He was still learning to consider people's feelings, and he was aware he hadn't considered hers. His delivery could have been kinder, but then again, she didn't spare his feelings earlier.

"Look, I'm not good at giving pep talks or whatever," Squall said, "and maybe I don't tell you enough that you're doing a good job, but you are. I know you don't like me, and since we're being really honest here, I'm not crazy about you either, but I have more respect for you than you know, and... I couldn't do this without you, Xu."

She lifted her head, her lips parted in surprise.

"And you're right," he said. "About all of it. My ties to Rinoa. Getting a position I didn't want or deserve. You're right, and I'm sorry you felt like you were overlooked because of it. This wasn't a choice I would have made for myself, but here we are, so... Can we put aside our grievances for now and agree that we're on the same team?"

"I can work with that, and I'll take your advice under consideration," she said. "But, just so you know, if Heartilly goes rogue and you go with her, I'll cut your heart out with a rusty butter knife."

Squall smiled.

"Understood."

Notes:

Fluff prompt for SilentStarlightSky. Forgive me for changing elevator to maintenance closet. The elevator thing just reminded me too much of that ild Selphie/Seifer fic where the two of them wind up making out in a broken elevator!