Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, Naruto Shippuden, or any other anime/manga for that matter. This is just a parody and all rights belong to their specific owners.

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Death was not how I expected it to be… When I had seen that man pull the trigger towards my mom I had acted immediately, somehow pushing her out of the way right before she was shot. The problem was, I ended up taking the bullet instead. I had never thought that I could die like that, hell I didn't think I would be able to die at all. Some sort of feeling of invincibility left over from my college days I'm sure.

I had just graduated from Tulane University in New Orleans, Louisiana yesterday. I majored in chemistry and was thought of as the smartest mind to come through the school for generations. I also had many other skills but they hardly mattered now. My friends had joked about how I had looked like an average kid despite everything that was going on in my life. I had dark brown hair and brown eyes and usually just wore an old jacket my dad got me before he died of cancer and some jeans. I wore glasses from time to time, or when I needed to drive, but they weren't part of my everyday look. However, anyone who knew me knew I was far from normal.

I was a genius. There is no other way to put it. I was able to decipher things in a week that took others years to even get a basic understanding of it. I loved history, but my true talents were in math and science. I had made formulas that had cured many diseases thanks to a combination of algebraic equations and an intense understanding of biology. I had developed a gun that ran on solar power which made our armies invincible and was the main reason we won the Korean Unification wars. However, I was also athletic and funny according to my friends since I was recently voted as the best quarterback in the entire country.

I had a quick mind and even quicker reflexes that made me a protégé in martial arts. However, I wasn't perfect by any means. For one, I could not sing whatsoever. I smiled briefly at the memory of my girlfriend dragging me to a karaoke bar and then immediately regretting it. I stopped smiling a moment afterwards and looked down at my hands before sighing. I was young, far too young to die. I was 26 years old when I had kicked the bucket, literally I kicked a bucket to distract the robber, and yet I was thought of as one of the most brilliant minds of my time. It was supposed to be a happy occasion, that day…

I had just graduated college that day and was at the top of my class, obviously. I was even offered a job as a college professor if I ever wanted it, but it seemed I wouldn't be able to take that offer now. Anyway, in celebration of the event my mom and I went out to one of the fanciest restaurants in all of New Orleans. We had been talking about how excited I was to accept a new job as a NASA rocket scientist, I had always been fascinated by space, when it happened. I didn't think, I just moved. All I knew was that there was a gunman, assumingly a robber like I said earlier, and he was pointing at my mother.

When I was hit by the bullet all I heard was, "No! Thomas!" and then a sense of coldness. It wasn't like they said it was in the movies, where you just feel cold and that's it. It is not painful, it is not overwhelming, it is just… cold. It's hard to explain… there is no coldness in the world like the one I have felt ever since I was thrown into this void, this was more final I suppose. After I realized I was dying I was filled with a small hope that I would see everyone who had died in my life again. My old girlfriend, Vanessa, who was killed by a drunk driver, my father who died of lung cancer thanks to that smoking habit of his, my brother, Charlie, who had died in the Korean Unification wars thanks to a missed landmine.

However, that hope was soon crushed as I realized that most of the religions were wrong about death. There was no Heaven, there was no Hell, there apparently wasn't any reincarnation either. There was only the void of nothingness that consumed you until you too became nothing. I think it is somewhat amusing that my first thought upon learning this was, "Damn it, why'd I even wake up that early then?!" referencing my Christian background.

My memories were beginning to fade away and soon I was sure I would have nothing left tying me to the old world. I missed my mom, and my friends, and even my professors but soon the emptiness would take hold of that too and rip it from me. There was no point in fighting it anymore… I had already fought enough. I smiled slightly as I leaned back into the void, finally accepting it's long standing offer of turning me into it. It was weird, how I could actually feel the void but not at the same time. Oh well, I didn't have to think anything anymore, that actually sounded kind of nice…

As I began to fade away I saw a blinding light start to envelop the area I was in, including me. "Oh damn it all, right when I became an atheist Heaven decides to come around. Just great." No amount of eyerolling could convey what I felt at that moment so instead I just shrugged and allowed the light to take me in. I'm pretty sure I would come to regret that decision.

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When I woke up I was momentarily worried since I couldn't open up my eyes, but luckily I could still hear, and I realized just how much I had missed the sweet thing that is sound. "Do you want to hold him Tetsu-san?" I heard one voice sound. That smooth and unworried voice belonged to a professional, I was sure of it. However, I had yet to discover what kind of professional. However, due to the way my movements felt sluggish and I felt small as well as the fact that I can't see and whenever I tried to talk it came out in baby speak, an actual language, I was left with one, impossible conclusion. It seemed like the Buddhists were right about that whole reincarnation thing.

"I-I mean, can I?" a deep voice asked hesitantly. In my mind I outlined a figure that had a large frame and a grey mustache. Don't know why, but I did.

"Yes, but make it quick, we won't be able to get to Konoha if you take too long. The Mist hunter nins are closing in after all, so don't make it longer than a minute." My mind briefly registered that I was being handed over to someone else, right after birth no less, because it was somewhere else. Charlie had been watching some anime before his death and he had really loved it. I mostly zoned him out but he said words that I registered belong to this world. The word belonged to the anime, Naruto, an entire different world. A world where most of my knowledge was useless since it required equipment that just wasn't here. Shit.

I squirmed and flailed trying to get away, get back to my world, back to the nothingness, anywhere was better than a world where I was weak and insignificant while there were god-like shinobi walking around. "Why is he acting like this?"

"I think it may have to do wi-," he was cut off as a large explosion rocketed the area. "Shit, give me the kid! I'll take him to Konoha as fast as possible! Hold the hunters off, if they get to him all hope for the Elric Clan is lost!"

I could feel the seriousness in the air as the other man, Tetsu-san, threw something towards the man carrying me. "Harold, make sure he has a good life. The ways of alchemy have been lost to this world for years… except for us. If it will make him feared enough to kill him, don't teach him it. We don't want a repeat of this… Now, go, and when he is of age, tell Kibo what happened to us."

I felt the man nod as he apparently flew away… no jumped my mistake. And I heard the sound of lightning and the ground rumbling in the distance. What in the world did I get myself into…? Before I could think about it further I heard the man holding me talk. "You are the last hope of the Elric Clan you know? We thought it was all over when the mizukage decided we were too dangerous to live but your previously thought barren mother became pregnant not too long ago. With you, they won't know who they are looking for. I'll bring you to Konoha where you will be safe little Kibo, and they will train you until you are the strongest shinobi in the world." Somehow, that did not make me feel any better…

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AN: Hello readers! Sorry the chapter is so short and don't worry, the others will be longer. I couldn't really find a bloodline that was interesting enough and matched with my ideas with the story so I just kind of stole the whole alchemy thing from Fullmetal Alchemist. Anyway, please tell me what you guys think of the whole story, ratings and reviews are highly appreciated and will help me know where I should move the story. Also, Kibo will be a sealer, alchemist, genjutsu guys probably who uses the subtle arts to fight. This is because I feel like these areas are underappreciated, that's all. Also, if anyone can come up with a better chapter PLEASE message me one. Until next chapter, see ya.