"Sakura, stand back." Kakashi shifted into a fighting stance, gathering chakra to his hand as he prepared to face the masked Akatsuki member blocking their way to providing backup for Naruto. Sakura nodded, taking several steps back.

"Be careful, Kakashi-sensei," she said, prepared to leap out of the way if need be.

"I'm sorry," the shinobi said, his voice muffled oddly by the orange mask, his attention abruptly focused on Sakura. "What did you just call him?"

"Um, Kakashi-sensei…?" She repeated hesitantly. There was a silence and Sakura got the feeling if she could see the man's face, he'd be gaping. He turned his head slightly to see Kakashi better.

"They gave you a genin team?" He demanded. Sakura blinked. She darted a quick glance at her teacher uncertainly. It wasn't really common knowledge that Kakashi had briefly taken a genin team, but this man seemed to be taking an almost personal offense to it. "What moron thought that was a good idea?!"

Sakura bristled, ready to leap to her teacher's defense, but Kakashi didn't seem to take any offense.

"I told them it was a bad idea," he shrugged. "I was overruled." And the next thing Sakura knew, she was no longer safely out of the line of fire; instead she was being held firmly against a chest, one arm wrapped around the front of her chest. The shinobi was holding a kunai out in front of them. Kakashi tensed

"I'm keeping her," he announced.

"Excuse me?!" Sakura spluttered. "Who the hell -"

"Maa, shinobi-san, don't you think you should ask her first?" Kakashi asked mildly. Sakura didn't even pretend to not be comforted by the kunai he was fingering.

"No," the shinobi said bluntly. "Because obviously everyone in your damn village is brain damaged for letting you be in charge of young children."

"I'm sixteen!" Sakura's voice reached an all new decibel, previously unheard by any except small animals. Kakashi's eyes narrowed.

"Do I know you, shinobi-san?" The shinobi growled.

"Yes, bastard, as a matter of fact you do!" A moment later, the hand extended in front of her was gone and then there was a thud as the mask hit the ground. "I gave you that fucking eye to protect people with and instead I get to spend the last fifteen years reading porn!"

"Obito?!"

"Who?!"

"You're alive?!"

"Are you stroking my hair?!"

"Shh, shh, it's okay," this Obito person soothed, patting her head with his free hand. "And then I find out that some idiot put you in charge of a genin team, because you did so well with the last one!" Kakashi winced. Sakura growled. "So now I'm keeping her. She's mine. Because obviously you can't be trusted with young girls put in your care -" Kakashi looked like someone had kicked him. Sakura was rapidly starting to lose patience. " And I would really hate for her to wind up with a chidori through her chest from someone she trusted, while her other friend watches helplessly from the side because he was too late to get there!"

That...sounded strangely specific, but Sakura didn't really care to try and parse out the details. Kakashi looked like he'd been gutted and with a shriek of rage, Sakura drove a chakra enhanced heel into Obito's, who howled and finally let her go.

She'd take care of Kakashi after she beat this shithead into the next age.

This takes place at no particular point in the timeline. It was just something I had bouncing around in my head and wanted to get out. Let me know what you think!