Disclaimer: Not mine, never have been, never will be. But I will accept them as gifts should the powers that be decide I could do a better job.
The road to Hilltop was long, giving Daryl plenty of time to think. He couldn't help but replay the visit with Carol over and over in his mind. It had been far too long since they'd seen each other and so much had happened since then. Daryl had so much he wanted to say to her but his fear took over and he remained silent.
He nearly broke when Carol asked about everyone at home. He hated lying to her but if he told her the truth, that Glenn and Abraham were victims of Negan, she would have joined the fight and it would have broken her. He would take her anger and possible hatred later if it meant she was safe now.
Every step he took meant Daryl's heart ached that much more. He nearly turned back so many times. If he went back, he would stay and he was needed too much elsewhere. Staying would be selfish.
By the time he reached Hilltop, Daryl was tired, hungry, and grumpy as shit.
Maggie and Sasha met him as he came through the front gate.
"How was the Kingdom?" asked Sasha. "Do they really have a tiger there?"
Daryl laughed softly. "Yeah, they really do. Shiva. He ain't bad. King Ezekiel seems okay as well. Carol approves so that's something."
Maggie cast a glance towards Sasha at the mention of Carol.
"Speaking of Carol, how is she?"
Daryl's shoulders dropped as he sighed deeply. "She's living outside the Kingdom in this little house. Wants nothing to do with anyone and spends her time alone."
He chewed his lip for a moment and stared off into the yard.
"She made me dinner."
"That's good, Daryl." Maggie paused for a moment and struggled with her next words. "What did she say when you told her about Glenn and Abraham?"
Daryl looked at the ground. "I couldn't tell her. The thought of Negan hurting our family had her upset and bringing her into this mess would've destroyed her. I lied."
"Are you serious?" Sasha was furious. "You didn't tell her? Come on, Daryl. How could you not tell her? She deserves to know that part of our family is gone."
"Ya didn't see her," he responded angrily, "She was near hysterical at the thought of someone being hurt. If I'd told her about Abraham and Glenn, there's no way she would sit out this fight. And she can't, it'd break her and I won't do that."
Sasha shook her head and turned away. "You're wrong, Daryl. We need her." Without looking back, she walked towards the trailer she and Maggie were using.
Maggie watched her walk away before speaking. "I get it, Daryl. I really do. Something happened between the prison and Terminus. Something bad and Carol's never gotten over it."
"Nope. Just says she can't talk about it, can't feel it."
"And it's eating her up inside. She'd been distancing herself from us for a while before she left Alexandria. She needs help. She needs you."
Daryl scoffed. "Ya crazy, she doesn't need me." Maggie shook her head at him.
"Course she does. And you need her. Don't forget I saw her after Terminus. She came into that clearing looking only at you, and you ran for her like she was water and you were dying of thirst."
She couldn't help but smile as she watched Daryl's jaw clench and a blush spread across his cheeks.
"It's okay, Daryl. You love her. We all need something to hold onto in this world. And being able to love means we're still here, alive and fighting."
"Yeah, but –"
"Don't you dare tell me that she doesn't love you as well. I've known you two for a long time and I've seen how she looks at you when you aren't looking."
"How's that?"
"The same way you look at her when she's not looking," Maggie laughed. "Glenn always said you two belonged together."
At the mention of Glenn, Daryl's eyes dropped to the ground. "Maggie, I –"
"Stop that, Glenn's death wasn't your fault. That's all on Negan. And we're gonna fight him and win for Glenn and Abraham. I love Glenn and I will miss him forever. But I don't regret the time we had together. We were happy and that's hard to find in the world now. You need to stop wasting time with Carol. Tell her how you feel and don't let her go. Cause in this world, we don't always get a tomorrow, you hear me?"
"Yeah," Maggie was persuasive as hell when she wanted to be. And she was right, he needed to stop wasting time with Carol. Life after the turn was too unpredictable and they'd both had too many close calls. "I'll tell her."
"Good," Maggie smiled, "Now let's get you some food and you can tell me more about the Kingdom."