It had been two days. Two days of listening to Sam reprimand him for being heartless and unromantic. Two days of Charlie waxing poetic about True Love's Kiss. Two whole days of the most annoying little brother and sister a man could get stuck with.
Apparently, when the angel was around it was like a buffer for them. They were on their best behavior as long as Castiel was in the room. Without the angel around to pop in unexpectedly they had free range of the bunker and used it to their full advantage.
Dean had already conceded that Sam was probably right about waiting for a better time to talk. That didn't seem to stop his brother from throwing ideas at him of what he could, or should do. When he mentioned the French restaurant in town Dean finally had enough and told him to knock it off. He was perfectly capable of figuring out his own plan of action.
Then there was Charlie who seemed content to harass him with fairytale renditions of his ridiculous attempt at rescuing an angel with CPR. To hear her tell it he was Prince Charming and Castiel was a damsel in distress, and no amount of reiterating the truth of the situation could sway her from her daydreams. Dean had taken to just rolling his eyes and leaving the room. He was well aware that his actions were entertaining her even then. Especially as his exit was usually followed by uncontrollable giggles.
Charlie had only been able to stay for a little while, before she had to return to her own life and responsibilities. She offered to hang around until Castiel returned, but the hunter knew there was no telling how long it would take. He convinced her that he would be fine. He'd lived through much worse than this before.
Saying goodbye to her was harder than Dean remembered it being before. Not that saying goodbye had ever been easy for him, but this time it was particularly difficult. The little shit had wormed her way deeper into his heart on this case, even as she was being a giant pain in the ass. She assured them that the separation wouldn't be as long this time, though. As if she missed them when she was away too. That reassurance made it a little better.
Dean retreated to the garage to escape the looks his brother had been sending him since Charlie left. It was less than a day and Dean was already restless without the redhead to distract him from his thoughts. She was good at keeping his mind occupied, even if his thoughts had still been on Castiel. At least he'd been too busy defending his actions, or rolling his eyes at her ridiculous preoccupation with what his future might be like now that he was ready to have one. When he was left with only his own thoughts, he could only think of all of the times the angel had gone to heaven and hadn't returned for months.
He was bent under the hood, trying to concentrate on tuning up his Baby so he could ignore the less than pleasant thoughts he couldn't seem to keep from swirling around in his brain, when he heard his brother's voice. The words were barely a rumble of sounds, and Dean knew they weren't meant for him. Which meant either Charlie had forgotten something, or Castiel was finally back. He tried to concentrate on the parts in his hand, but he could sense it the second he was no longer alone.
The angel was silent as he stepped up beside him, but Dean was used to that by now. Castiel was a man of few words. "I'm glad that you came back." He told him, already feeling that the words revealed too much. And it would only get worse from here.
"I said that I would." The angel leaned against the bumper next to where Dean was still pretending to work.
"Yeah, well just because you intended to, doesn't mean it was going to happen. It seems like there's always something, doesn't it? There's always something keeping you from being here."
All the times he had lost the angel flashed through his mind, and he had a hard time containing the emotion that came with the thoughts. He couldn't keep it from his voice either, and the words came out sad and he let loose an exhausted sigh. "I'm tired of losing you."
"You haven't lost me." Castiel told him. As if the proof of the angel being with him now should have been enough to show the hunter that he hadn't lost the angel. He seemed confused by Dean's choice of words about the times when he was away.
"Damn it, Cas! We lose you all the time!" He had to take a breath and steady himself. It wasn't the angel's fault he was so literal, and Dean really shouldn't get agitated about it. Castiel had never been any other way. The angel dropped his attention so he was no longer looking at the hunter. Dean knew he would have to try to keep himself calm during this conversation.
"I've lost you to your duties. I've lost you to things you've felt it was your responsibility to fix. I lost you in purgatory. Twice. I've lost you to heaven and their bullshit more times than I can count. I've lost you to the Leviathan. I lost you to power and weakness. I thought I was going to lose you again when you were attacked. I've already lost you so many times, and I can't do it anymore, Cas. I want you here." And then just to make sure his point was being made he steeled himself and added, "With me."
The angel finally met his eyes at the admission, and Dean counted that as a win, no matter how small a victory it was, and no matter how much it had taken out of him to confess.
"Of course I would rather be here with you." Castiel told him softly and the hunter breathed a small sigh of relief at the words. It was a hard concession without some reassurance it was being well received, and luckily the angel seemed to understand that.
Castiel met his gaze with a steady mixture of happiness and sadness that was impossible to decipher. He seemed displeased by the explanation Dean had offered as proof of his continuous loss of the angel. When he spoke, his voice was soft and reverent.
"You look to the past and you see only loss. When I look at all of the times we've been torn from each other, I only see that they couldn't keep us apart. They tried. Sometimes it seemed like all of heaven and hell and everything in-between were working to keep us apart."
The angel offered a soft smile and took a step forward to lessen the space between them. "When I look at our past, I only see that you found me anyway. And I found you. Over and over again."
Dean felt his own lips turn to a smile at the words. It was hard enough arguing with Castiel's logic even when he thought the angel was wrong. Dean felt no need to argue with Castiel's more positive take on their past. Not this time. Perhaps he had just been looking at things the wrong way.
He feared that his grin was getting that besotted quality to it that said he was absolutely smitten with the other man. He didn't try to hide it this time. "Maybe I need to adjust my way of thinking a bit."
Castiel graced him with a deeper smile of his own. It wasn't the dopey lovestruck grin that Dean knew was across his own face, but the emotion behind the angel's eyes was a variation of the same thing. The angelic equivalent. "Maybe I should try to stay here more often. I know I have a habit of leaving on a new mission as soon as the case has been solved." The angel conceded in what seemed to be some kind of compromise.
"Well, that might be nice." Even just talking like this was nice. Maybe they would be able to reach an agreement that would allow for all of the other parts of their relationship that Dean still wanted to explore.
The hunter dropped a hand on top of the one Castiel had placed on the car, and the angel's attention snapped to the hand immediately. Dean refused to pull back unless Castiel gave an indication that he was uncomfortable. When the angel only stared at their hands for a moment, Dean decided to continue the conversation before he forgot completely what they were talking about.
"Or you could just bring us with you. We can help." Dean ducked his head a bit, avoiding direct eye contact. "And we could probably use your help on our cases, too."
He tried not to allow too much emotion into his voice, but didn't really know how successful he was with that. He hoped he was able to convey his true meaning with those few words. He didn't just want the angel around. He wanted him around always. He didn't want Castiel to ask for help only when he needed it, he wanted them to work together. He didn't want the angel's help on some of their cases, he wanted him there on all of his cases. He didn't really feel that he could say all of that out loud yet, though. He'd just hope, for now, that the angel was able to decipher the rest.
Castiel seemed to be analyzing his words, and turned that soul searching gaze on him. Dean didn't know what he was searching for, but he did his best not to shy away from those prying eyes. He was done hiding.
The hand under his moved to link their fingers together, and he allowed it. He reveled silently in the novelty of standing inches away from the man he loved, face to face, with their fingers now locked together, and staring into brilliant blue eyes as they bored into his soul.
The sudden smile that crossed Castiel's features said he had found whatever he'd been searching for. "You wish to work together, consistently?" He finally asked, and Dean breathed a sigh of relief at the question. Maybe the angel really would be able to figure out what he was trying to say.
"Of course. I'm tired of finding you, Castiel. Aren't you tired of being lost?" He deliberately switched their theories of what had happened in the past.
"I am tired of being lost." The smile the angel graced him with was full of hope and happiness. "Perhaps if we can stay within arm's reach of each other we can stay found this time."
Dean's face quickly melted into a grin that was less than innocent, and the look was clearly not lost on Castiel as the angel responded with a raised eyebrow that did the same things to Dean's libido that he hoped his smirk had done to Castiel.
"Perhaps we should stay closer than arm's length, just in case."
The expression on the angel's face turned to amusement with a hint of what Dean prayed was arousal. "That may be the wisest course of action." Castiel said seriously.
Dean couldn't help but chuckle at that response. As clueless as the angel was at times, he seemed to understand what the hunter was trying to get at, and was even playing along.
Dean slowly breached the space between them. He made sure to make his intentions clear. He didn't want Castiel to do anything he wasn't comfortable with, but he also wanted the other man to know exactly what was being offered in their agreement.
They were so close they were breathing the same air, and when the hunter spoke he knew the angel could feel the words brush across his face. "Do you think this will be close enough?" He asked, his own breath catching as he paused, his body still affected by his closeness to Castiel.
"I doubt it. The world is very determined to keep us apart." The angel said slyly. That was a better response than the hunter was hoping for, and he grinned as he leaned forward and pressed his chest to Castiel's. His free hand rested on the other man's hip gently for balance.
"Is this better?" Dean asked him, knowing that even his tone betrayed the amount of want he was trying to suppress in order to make sure the angel was alright with the turn of events. If his actions were also teasing the other man, well that was just an added bonus.
Castiel groaned deeply before he dropped Dean's hand in order to wrap his arms around the hunter's neck. The angel pulled Dean closer, until their lips were close enough to touch. They didn't actually touch until Castiel spoke, and his lips dragged gently across the hunter's as he did. "Possibly."
Dean couldn't even remember what they were talking about anymore. All he could think about was the sweet lips he had been fantasizing about, scant millimeters away from his own. He let loose a frustrated groan of his own as he forgot all about the game he was playing and pressed his lips to Castiel's.
The angel moaned softly as their lips finally met, and Dean couldn't stop an answering moan of his own. The relief of finally pressing his lips to the other man's had a profound effect on the hunter's psyche. It was as if he had been waiting for this kiss his entire life.
The electric fire that coursed through his veins at the contact was a sensation he couldn't remember ever feeling before. Maybe his first kiss had been like this, exciting and new. Certainly it wasn't anything like the disappointment he'd felt recently as he tried to satiate his hunger with people he felt no real affection for. In fact, it was the complete opposite. Instead of emptiness and regret weighing down his heart, he felt as if a weight was being lifted. Making room for a kind of hope he hadn't felt in a while.
He closed his eyes and pressed himself flush with Castiel. The arms around his neck tightened, and he wrapped his own arms around the angel's waist in response, pulling the bottom half of their bodies as close as the rest of them.
He released the angel's lips only long enough to take a steadying breath, and when they met Castiel's again, he used his tongue to part them. He dove into the warmth he found and although the angel didn't seem to know how to respond, he allowed the action, only making a small sound of surprise. It took only a moment for the other man to catch on to the new development, and before Dean could begin to worry that he was pushing too fast, the angel's tongue rose to battle with his own.
Dean's surprise at the speed of Castiel's learning curve, and his fear that he was beginning to push his luck in the situation, was enough to make him pull back. They both sucked in a lungful of air while they had the chance, grinning at each other in the aftermath.
"I'll probably have to do that at least once a day for the rest of my life." Dean spoke before he thought, and he mentally kicked himself as soon as the words escaped him. Who said something like that after they kissed someone for the first time?
Castiel seemed less than put out by the thought as he graced the hunter with the brightest smile he had ever seen cross the angel's face.
"I think I can handle that." Castiel assured him, and honestly, that was the best response he could have hoped for.
When they finally made their way into the kitchen, Sam was waiting. His face spoke of a thousand questions he was going to try not to voice.
"Hey Sammy, look who finally showed up." Dean said, claiming the last of the coffee in the pot. It wasn't much, and it was the darkest and nastiest bit from the bottom, but Dean had never been particularly picky.
"Yeah." His brother acknowledged, nodding at Castiel. "Hey, Cas."
The angel nodded back at him and even sent him a small smile as he responded. "Hello, Sam."
Dean was well aware that his brother knew they had been talking in the garage and wondered if Sam would bring it up with Castiel in the room. He probably wouldn't be able to hold all of his questions back.
"Did you guys get a chance to talk?" Sam asked, glancing between the angel that had seated himself at the table and Dean who was still leaning against the counter next to the coffee maker. It just went to show how well Dean actually knew his little brother.
"Yep. Cas and I are on the same page now, I think. He has agreed to be part of the team. We're going to help him out with some of his angel stuff, and he'll help us out with more of our cases." Dean sent a smile to the angel to show him how pleased he was with the idea. As long as they all were on the same team, they couldn't lose.
Sam frowned at him, and Dean couldn't really figure out what he might be upset about now. He had finally gotten around to talking to the angel about his feelings, and they had even worked out some of the details. What could Sam possibly still have issues with?
"A part of the team?" Sam asked, in that way that said he knew more than his brother and was about to prove it. "Don't you mean, a partnership?"
Then it hit Dean what Sam was upset about. His little brother feared he had asked Castiel to be around more often, but hadn't actually gotten around to why he would like to have the angel nearby. And Dean thought Sam was supposed to be the smart one.
Sam turned to Castiel, probably to make sure that the other man understood what he was implying. The amused look on the angel's face seemed to startle him, and Castiel answered the question before Dean could even get upset about his stupid brother putting his nose where it didn't belong again.
The angel's smile held a fondness as he spoke. "Sam, do you imagine that Charlie didn't know what she was talking about when she said you two were a pair? That you can't have one without the other?" He reached forward to pat the hand that Sam had on the table in a gesture he must have learned from all the time he spent watching the Hallmark channel when he wasn't supposed to. "Nothing will be able to separate the two of you. I have no intention to try and take your brother from you. I can only hope that you will accept me as part of the team."
Dean could tell his brother was surprised by the admission, and the puppy dog eyes he was sporting said he was getting emotional about being included. The fear of being excluded probably hadn't even occurred to him yet. But it would have, eventually. The angel squashed those doubts before they could even manifest.
"Of course! You are already part of the team." Dean watched as his brother tried to reassure Castiel even as the angel did the same for him. Sam didn't actually spill his feelings all over the place, but instead seemed to be unable to stop his mouth from rambling. "You know we love having you here. You're family! I'm just happy to hear that you'll be around more often." As if to prove his point the giant jumped off his stool and swept the angel into an unexpected hug. The look of surprise on Castiel's face was enough to force a chuckle out of Dean.
"Alright sasquatch! The poor guy can't breathe." Dean laughed as his brother immediately released the angel, although he knew Castiel was probably fine with the arrangement.
It made Dean a little emotional himself, to see how quickly Sammy had jumped in to reassure the angel of his welcome within their family. Not to mention how quickly Castiel had rushed to make sure his brother knew they would be a team. All three of them.
"Sorry! I'm just… I'm just really pleased to see that things are finally working out." The huge smile Sam graced them with said it was the truth.
Dean didn't try to hide his own overjoyed smile as he watched his brother settle back into the chair next to his angel.
"Me too, Sammy. Me too."
There was a very good possibility that this was all Dean would ever need to be truly happy. Team Free Will, working together again. No apocalypse on the horizon this time, though. They had been through so much, and made it through together. They would certainly be able to find a way to make this new development work for all three of them.
It wouldn't always be easy, but it would always be the three of them together. And that was what truly mattered.