4:13 a.m.

With a weary grimace, Shikamaru watched as Ino tried to maneuver the scissors around the paper again. She had been attempting, for the past hour and a half, to cut a series of hearts, but her alcohol-induced, understandably subpar hand-eye coordination wasn't doing her any favors. The result was a scattered mess of unevenly cut strips of paper – some of them rounded, others jagged, but none of them holding any semblance to the shape of her liking – littered around her.

Ino pursed her lips and blew her bangs to the side as she steadied the blades against the colored paper once more. "Third time's the charm," she muttered under her breath, eyebrows furrowing in single-minded focus.

If Shikamaru had a death wish, he would have told her that her third time's passed quite a ways ago, but he liked his head where it was at, thank you very much, and, besides, there was some sick sort of joy to be derived from watching the usually self-possessed Yamanaka Ino stumble through a simple task.

Not that he particularly enjoyed shaming his former teammate – annoying as she was – but the half-empty bottle of wine sitting on the formerly-coffee-now-liquor table was throwing his inhibitions out the door.

Which reminded him.

Reaching an arm out, Shikamaru grabbed the bottle and took another swig of wine, fresh from Iwagakure and very, very effective at doing what it ought to do. Ino had chosen it primarily for its high alcohol content, wallowing as she was in self-piteous misery and general godforsakenness, but had relinquished it to his care as soon as the shape-cutting started to confuse her.

Fortunately, his (Ino-delegated) task wasn't as focus-intensive; otherwise, he had no idea how he was supposed to survive the night.

Tucking the bottle carefully between two cushions, Shikamaru turned to the pile of CDs on the corner and tried to remember which ones he hadn't played yet. Ino had insisted on the "best-est music only" but gave no criteria as to what that entailed, so he had spent the better part of an hour looking for a suitable song, playing the tracks one by one on her portable radio and choosing whatever sounded slow enough to dance to.

It wasn't that difficult – given that her taste in music lay somewhere between girly pop, upbeat bar themes, and crooning ballads – but it didn't mean that sitting and listening through her whole repertoire of collected CDs wasn't troublesome.

Ergo, the wine.

A loud yelp from across the room announced that Ino had managed to, yet again, jab herself. Shikamaru sighed but didn't bother glancing up this time. There were no surprises there; most likely, the same sight would greet him: Ino, her thumb or whatever injured finger slipped between her lips, looking teary-eyed and frustrated as she knelt in the middle of her failed paper crafts.

"Have you found anything yet?" she called out, her voice expectedly muffled. "Oh, please, please tell me you have."

She sounded anxiously desperate, perhaps realizing just then how absolutely bonkers and half-baked her plan was. Shikamaru could have told her that the moment she dragged him out of bed, but, again, he wasn't suicidal, nor was he looking to be rid of any of his limbs.

"I think so," he answered, gesturing vaguely at the stack of CDs. "See if you like anything."

"Mmm, great. At least something's going right."

There was a bit of shuffling as Ino struggled to stand, tipsy from half the contents of her Iwagakure wine bottle and the two cans of beer she consumed earlier in the evening. Shikamaru could have sworn she didn't drink so much the last time someone broke up with her, but he was hardly one to talk, what with said wine bottle nearly empty by now.

"Okay, so what've you got, Shikamaru?" mumbled Ino, looking tired and disheveled in her oversized sweats as she tumbled beside him. "Make it quick, 'cause we've got to set up the dinner and stuff."

Shikamaru didn't think she was in any state to accomplish anything on her crazy to-do list, but he handed her the CDs all the same. "Look these over. I don't know what you wanted, but these sounded slow enough."

Tucking her legs beneath her, Ino gratefully accepted the albums and shuffled through them, poring over the song lists intently like it mattered. Maybe to her it did, but Shikamaru was pretty sure Choji wouldn't care for the music as long as his date was seated in front of him.

But he didn't dare verbalize as much, especially when an expression of pure joy was presently blossoming on Ino's face.

"Oh, these are great," she breathed, sounding both gleeful and surprised. "I didn't know you had excellent taste."

Shikamaru reckoned he ought to feel slighted for her disbelief, but it was hard to feel that way when Ino was beaming at him. "Eh, not really."

"Oh, please, don't be so modest. You're doing a lot better than I am." Ino turned a baleful gaze at the mound of broken paper hearts on the floor. "Me? I'm such a failure."

"Ah, sheesh, don't say that," answered Shikamaru hastily, keen on heading off another crying session more than anything. He didn't think his sleep-deprived and slightly drunk brain could handle any more troublesomeness at the current hour. "You're alright. Look, we'll just go to the store in the morning and buy something else."

She glanced back at him, her bottom lip protruding slightly. "You really think so?" she asked, with a slight sniff. "Because that's a big pile of nothing right there, Shikamaru."

He shrugged. "You tried your best."

Ino raised an eyebrow, wholly unconvinced by his platitude, and returned to her task. "Whatever. It doesn't matter. The important thing is, everything goes according to plan." She looked up from her CDs. "You still have my list?"

"Right here." He retrieved the slightly crumpled paper from his pocket and flattened it against the liquor table. Shikamaru tried to suppress a groan as he skimmed over Ino's to-do list again. He didn't have the faintest idea how they were supposed to pull off her spur-of-the-moment plan, especially when it was supposed to be implemented in fourteen hours.

Not to mention, they were both teetering on the drunk end of the scale and running on very little sleep. Plus, Ino was obviously still torn up about her failed relationship. All signs pointed to close-to-impossible, and he wished his companion would just realize that already.

"What time does Choji arrive again?"

Shikamaru sagged against the cushions tiredly, knowing full well he didn't have the heart to tell her no. "Five-thirty, according to his timetable," he replied as he ran a hand over his face.

"And Karui?"

"A little later. I'm not sure."

"Okay." Ino leaned forward and scrunched up her face as she read her list. "So, we can tick off music, and maybe decorations in the morning. I'll get the roses ready, and you'll take care of the restaurant?"

"…Sure." Shikamaru was fairly certain most of the restaurants in the village would've already been fully booked by now, but he supposed he could call in a few favors. As much as he hated being indebted to other people, throwing another disappointing curveball at Ino would be even more troublesome in the long run. "I'll… do that."

"It has to be a rooftop reservation, Shikamaru," continued Ino, quite oblivious to his distress. "Or it won't work. Remember: this is a special day for Choji, and we have to help him. He's our friend and teammate. It's our duty to do so."

Shikamaru couldn't recall his best friend asking for assistance for this one small matter, nor did he remember ever agreeing to anything of the sort. But he was way past the point of no return now, leaving nothing else for him to do but reach for the bottle and drink the rest of it.

"That just leaves the balloons, the vintage wine, the string quartet, the fireworks display… And we're all set!" Ino turned to him with a smile, illuminating in spite of her recent drawbacks. "I'm so excited! Aren't you?"

Exhaling heavily, Shikamaru managed a nod and a half-smirk in return.

Author's Note: Oh my god! I was supposed to post this daaaays before the 14th, and my stupid brain boofed it (in the Jake Peralta sense of the word). Anyway, here it is: an attempt at a multi-chapter fic (fingers crossed). Not sure if I can update tomorrow (ugh, work is such a distraction), but I will try my best. In the meantime, if any of you guys are playing Ultimate Ninja Blazing on mobile, my friend code is 554,344,484,214. Happy days!