Chains Of Love

A Star vs. The Forces Of Evil Fanfiction by Lord Malachite

Historian's Note—This story takes place later in the night after the events depicted in the episode "Bon Bon The Birthday Clown" and prior to the events depicted in "Raid The Cave"

Star Butterfly sat on the mattress of her plush princess bed, hugging her knees to her chest as her wand lay beside her, still and almost useless. The blond girl shook, wracked with sobs that had tired her body out. The tears had finally stopped coming when she had none left in her, staining her bedsheets as they fell from her eyes, running down her legs. Everything felt off. Her throat was hoarse from her gasps, her body exhausted from the evening's prior battle with Ludo, the stress of having nearly been sucked into a portal that could have gone anywhere or nowhere, the loss of her spellbook and mentor, Glossaryck, and the harsh realization that she was no longer the center of Marco Diaz's universe. Indeed, perhaps she never would be again.

Ludo's theft of her spellbook, her heritage and roots, her very identity—it was all an open wound. She had no one to guide her now, Glossaryck was gone and with him, his knowledge and wisdom that always pushed her forwards, forced her to grow more as a person and as a magical princess destined to rule over Mewni. It occurred to her now, far too late, just how much she had taken him for granted all this time, sometimes even treating the diminutive teacher like an interloper in her happiness, when all he ever wanted was what was best for her, and best for Mewni. Glossaryck had even taken a strange interest in Marco, seemingly understanding that her best friend would have untold impact on her life. But now he was gone, vanished with her entire family history, everything she was and would be.

And yet, the gash in her soul caused by this loss was exacerbated only by the knife in her heart she know found herself with, courtesy of Marco. The princess still couldn't fathom what had happened. Only a week ago she had been congratulating Marco on his new efforts with Jackie Lynn-Thomas, the progress he had made, gaining her attention and revealing his feelings for the athletic beauty. Things were growing between the two of them, and Star had felt satisfied to see her best friend shine, for a lifelong dream of his to start coming true at last.

And then she had seen them together this evening and it was as though some kind of invisible hand had clenched her heart and begun squeezing. This was not what she had expected. Marco was her best friend, and his happiness was her happiness. Or, at least, it had been. Now more than ever, his happiness felt as though it were coming at her expense, and those tears just kept falling from her eyes until they were spent, and she was left with dry sobs, clutching a pillow for support. It was wrong, it was all wrong. The book, Glossaryck, Marco, her mother, her destiny. All of it was twisting inside of her stomach, ensnaring her heart in anguish and despair. This wasn't what her life was supposed to be. This wasn't how anything was meant to go. It was all like some kind of liquid nightmare, drowning her over and over. She hated the way that she felt, powerless like some kind of damsel in distress. She had gotten herself into trouble plenty of times, but she always found her way out, be it with the help of a friend or on her own. So why did this seem so insurmountable.

"Marco." The name came to her lips unbidden, but something about it felt oh so right. Marco Diaz. Marco Diaz had done something to her, of this there was no question. He had breached a part of her that had up until now remained whole. There he was, lying in his room down the hall, a boy who meant something to her. Something perhaps more than friendship. No, not perhaps. She was certain of it now. What was unclear was exactly what he meant.

There had been boys in her life before Marco, including Tom, her demonic ex-boyfriend. But as the princess searched her feelings, she knew that there just wasn't anything like this before. Tom had been a lark, someone fun and dangerous that appealed to her naughty side, her desire to break the mold, to not conform, to not be another rubber stamp, cookie cutter princess. And he had been good for that. For a demon, he really wasn't so bad a guy if it weren't for his anger issues. But she had never felt anything approaching love for the demon. He was just...there. Someone she had spent time with, someone who was, in small ways, still a part of her life.

Marco, on the other hand...it was difficult to define. She had never really thought of Marco as dating material. They were best friends, and that was good. It wasn't that Marco wasn't attractive or didn't make her feel anything. There was just that line between them. He was in the Friend Zone, and that felt right to her.

At least, it had felt right. A week before, she had been cheering Marco on in his efforts with Jackie Lynn-Thomas. She had been watching him grow more confident, finding himself. And it was a sweet thing to behold. There had been a sense of happiness and accomplishment. If ever there was a time to support her bestie, this was it, and she had been proud to do so.

And then she had seen them together, and something inside of her had died. Ever since coming to Earth, Star had known she was the center of Marco's universe, and that had always made her feel special. Sure, he had always had feelings for Jackie, but that hadn't mattered. Star had not been seeking romance, merely attention and affection, both of which Marco lavished upon her. Now, she was suddenly second tier, not as important, a lesser force in his life, bumped aside by Jackie Lynn-Thomas and her full, curvy hips and feminine physique. the thought of it made Star ache. It was foolish, to think that Marco would ever think of her as a girl, a young woman, the kind he would want to be more-than-friends with. She was an alien princess from another dimension and her body type as very different than Jackie's. There was no reason he would be physically attracted to her. And if he wasn't physically attracted, that he wasn't going to fall for her charms, either.

"Charms, pfft." Star blew a raspberry at the very idea. She knew that she was too hyper and spontaneous for Marco. It was amazing that their friendship even survived when she considered all the things that got in the way. And yet it ate at her, hollowing out her Mewman heart. There was something with Marco, something undeniable. She had once been happy to see Marco and Jackie together. Now, she felt other things entirely. Hurt. Anger. Resentment. The sight of them together made a kind of sickness take root in her veins, poisoning her heart. She hated that feeling. It was not who she aspired to be. Jealousy was a petty trait she was not used to. But it consumed her now to even think of them. Why? Why Jackie and not her? Wasn't she pretty enough? Wasn't she someone that Marco could see himself with? But she wasn't, was she. Because he didn't feel a spark. Didn't have the feelings digging into his heart, pulling him to her like a magnet, sucking him into her gravitational pull like a vortex...

I'm not letting go! The words were like a slap across her face and a bucket of ice water over her head. That was what he had said to her, so full of desperation as she was being sucked into a portal of her own creation, a victim of Ludo's cruelty after the mercy she had shown him had been repaid in kind with malice. "I'm not letting go." She whispered the words, over and over like a mantra, growing in strength, feeling a fire returning.

"I'mnotlettinggoI'mnotlettinggoI'mnotlettinggoI'mnotlettinggo!" She seized her wand and burst off of her bed, kicking her bedroom door open and straightening her nightgown as she ran out of her room, dashing down the hall and beating her fists upon the door to Marco's bedroom. Finally she had something she could use, something real between them. It had to make a difference, it simply had to!

"Open this door Marco Diaz!" She banged her fist against the wooden gateway to her bestie's room, not caring what hour it was. She suddenly regretted not simply using her dimensional scissors to simply let herself in, but wasting time going back to her room just felt annoying, a waste of precious time. Every second counted in the battle of her heart and she had squandered far too many already. From the first day she had come to Earth, arriving at Echo Creek High School as her parents enrolled her, each day she had been giving away something too precious to lose.

The door to Marco's room opened without any cue from the boy inside, and had it not been for her fast reflexes, she would have mistakenly punched the sleepy boy in the face. A part of her wanted to do exactly that, for the pain he had caused her, but no, violence was not the answer. Sometimes she wondered if she could live with Marco, but her soul knew there was no way she could live without the Hispanic boy. He could be frustrating, yes, but so was she. It was all a kind of maddening maelstrom, the way their personalities intertwined, sometimes bouncing off of one another, while at other times, merging them into a complete partnership, a fusion of order and entropy. And still the waves washed over them, breaking against their united front in ways neither of them could predict. The wall of their partnership had always held, but cracks were starting to form. And suddenly, Star Butterfly realized that, whatever happened between them next, the strain might be strengthened. She fisted her hands, deciding her option immediately as her fight-or-flight instincts kicked in, as she gazed upon the sleepy, perturbed face of her best friend. "Star, it's after three in the morning. What are you even doing?"

"We need to talk." The princess responded with four words no human male ever really desired to hear. In almost any culture, they were followed by a profoundly awkward and uncomfortable conversation. Tonight, it seemed, would be no different.

"Now? Seriously? At three o'clock in the morning?" Marco complained.

The blonde girl nodded, pushing past him into the room. "Now. Right now, Marco."

The teenage boy sighed, closing the door behind him. "What's wrong? Is this about Ludo and your spellbook? Because we're gonna get them back, Star. I promised you I would help and I meant it."

"No, this has nothing to do with the book!" The Mewman girl pulled at her hair, tangling it even further than the matted, unkempt look it already held. "This is more important. This is about us!"

"Us?" Marco blinked, feeling completely confused. "What do you mean? Are we having some kind of problem?"

"Marco, the fact you don't even feel like there is a problem between us is a problem." She sniffed, tugging at the neck of her nightgown absently.

"Ok, now I'm confused. Did I do something wrong?"

"Yes! No…I…ugh, I thought this would be easier. I had it all in my head just a minute ago!"

"Ok. So, try relaxing for a second. What's on your mind at this ungodly hour?"

"You. You're on my mind. You're on my mind and it's making me really, really agitated."

"Did I do something to upset you?" Marco tapped his chin, trying to think on something that might have set his princess off like this.

"Yes! And the thing is, it's stupid. It's so, so stupid. It's not your fault. Notyourfaultnotyourfault." She swung her head back and forth, shaking like a leaf.

"Star?" A concerned expression crossed the Latino's face, and he took her hand and brought her to his bed, sitting her on the mattress. "It's alright, just talk to me. If I've upset you I'm sure we can figure this out and make it right."

"No, that's just it, Marco." She sighed, scooting an inch away from her friend. "You can't. This is just…it's messed up. It's broken, and I don't know how to fix it."

"What's broken?"

"It's not your fault." She sniffed. "The signs were always there and I just ignored them because I wanted you to be happy and I thought I was happy and things were fine and then she and you and=="

"Star, please." He stopped her, placing his fingers on her left shoulder. "What's going on?"

"That's what I want to know." She sniffed, gathering her emotions. "I thought I knew. I was so sure that something was one way, and then these things happen and you realize that…that maybe it isn't that way at all. That it's all different than you think."

"Life is often like that, Star." He nodded, giving her a weak smile. "I'm sure it'll be fine. We can figure this out together, right?"

"I dunno." She shrugged, tears welling up in her eyes. "It's all gone wrong and I'm…I'm losing you. I'm watching you slip away and I just can't take it. I don't even know what I'm supposed to do so I'm doing this."

"Doing what? Star, I'm right here. How are you losing me? What's going on?"

"In the graveyard, tonight, with Ludo." Star ignored his questions, pressing on with her own reasoning, following her own stream of consciousness. "You grabbed my hand and told me you wouldn't let go." Her voice dropped, thoughts coming out in a whisper. "You promised not to let go."

"And I didn't, I didn't let go, Star. I saved you. And tomorrow, we'll start working on saving Glossaryck and the book. It's going to be alright. Ludo won't get away with it."

"You promised not to let go!" Star wailed, pushing him.

"I didn't. I didn't let go Star."

"Liar."

"Star? You're here. You didn't get sucked into any portal. I never let go and our friends and I pulled you to safety. You're safe."

"What about Jackie?" The words flew out of her mouth, the princess clamping a hand over it, as though she could still prevent them from escaping.

"Ok, I'll bite, what about Jackie?" The boy asked, continuing to be confused.

"She…and you…and…and-and you don't need me anymore."

"What?"

"You promised not to let go of me. But then you went and comforted Jackie! And maybe that makes me terribly selfish but I-I didn't like it, Marco. I thought we had something!"

"We do have something! Star, you're my best friend, and I-"

"Something else." She insisted, not wanting to spell it out for him. Not needing to, either, when she saw the way that Marco froze, looking like her had just been doused with ice water.

"W-wait, Star, are you trying to tell me that-"

"I don't know! I don't know what I'm saying, only that it's always been just you and me and now you have Jackie and it feels like you're letting go of me and I hatehatehate that feeling!"

"Star, I-I've been waiting to be with Jackie since I was four years old!"

"I know! And I was totally okay with that, I wanted you to be happy. But now it just feels like-"

"No, Star, this is just—you don't get to just decide you don't like me being with someone when you were the one who helped me get with her to begin with. I'm not about to just-just change because it's what you want."

"I know that." She sniffed, trying not to cry.

"You know that?" Marco asked, sounding doubtful.

"Yeah. I know that."

"Then why are you here?"

"I'm here because whatever this is it's real and worth trying to figure out. There's this thing that's been going on between us ever since we met and-and I'm not letting you let go of that."

"What do you want me to do? Star, I'm going out with Jackie and it's amazing. We've really started to click."

"Did you kiss her?" The blonde asked, steepling her fingers together.

"Ah, well…y-yeah. I did."

"Was it good?"

"Yeah. It was…nice. Jackie is really…amazing."

"Then I want you to kiss me." The princess shuddered a bit at the boldness of that thought, the disappointment evident on Marco's face.

"I can't kiss you Star. I'm seeing Jackie now, I could never betray her like that."

"We have something, I want to embrace this together." She whispered, cupping his face in her hands. "Don't run away from this. Just…just let yourself feel this for what it is."

"And then what?"

"You'll see." She gulped, looking up at him. "Just one kiss. One kiss between friends. If you're going to keep your promise then you'll do this."

Marco crossed his arms. "One kiss. No tongue. And then this is over,"

"Yeah, it's over. Just a one time thing. Totally."

"Alright, how do we do this?"

"How did you do it with Jackie?"

"I dunno, we were just close, looking at each other and then…it happened."

"Ok, so, let's do it like that." She tilted her head upwards, looking at him. "How's this?"

"Hold on, I can't kiss you if I'm feeling pressured!"

"There's no pressure, just-"

"I need a minute to=="

"Ok, never mind, forget I asked. This was a horrible idea." She stood up. "Forget I ever said anything. Have a good life, Marco."

"Star, no!" He shouted, causing the blonde to pause midstep.

"Yes, Marco?"

"This really means a lot to you, huh?"

"More than you'll ever know." She sniffed. "Why it doesn't mean something to you when so much is at stake, I-"

He took her in his arms, then, a familiar hug they had shared hundreds of times. Like earlier that evening, she wept into his shoulder, her emotions pouring out of her like a faucet that had been turned on, a veritable waterfall of anxieties. Marco brushed tears out of her face with his left thumb, leaning his head down and touching his forehead with hers.

"Y'know, this shouldn't be so h-hard." Star steadied herself, collecting her nerves.

"Of course it should be hard!" Marco countered. "We're friends, Star! Best friends! This is how friendships get messed up."

"S'already messed up." She pouted, looking into his brown eyes earnestly. "We've already done everything else." She whispered, jogging his memory. "We go to movies and dine out together. We snuggle under a blanket and watch our favorite shows. We tell each other secrets and dreams. We go on walks in the park. We dance and play. That one time you came crashing all the way down to the Underworld like a jealous boyfriend just because you were worried about me." She placed her right hand on his neck, her fingers smoothly stroking his skin. "We hug a little too long. Say all the right things to make each other feel better. I make mistakes all the time and you always forgive me. So kissing should be the easy part, Marco. It only confirms what's always been there."

"How do I know it's always been there? I'm not sure what I feel, Star, and-"

"That's because you're thinking when you should be feeling. Just go with this. Let go of everything you think you know about me, about Jackie, about yourself and just let yourself feel."

"What if I can't?"

"You can. I'm coming, Marco, enough talk." She breathed a ragged sniffle before pushing herself up onto the tips of her toes, pressing her lips into his. It was the first real kiss she had known, and act of romance simple and as old as time. She felt like a novice, but the best way to describe his kiss was inviting and full, promising all she wanted and delivering. He tasted like happiness itself, strong but somehow subtle, her breath inhaling his delectable scent, tasting his strength on her lips.

Marco, however, had begun to feel dizzy. Star's breath on his neck tickled, and she tasted like sugar, full of all the best parts of life. Instinctively, he wrapped his arms around her waist, and she reciprocated by pulling him even closer, her arms tangling gently around his neck. The warmth he felt from her was nearly overwhelming. This was not at all what he had expected. A moment ago, the idea of kissing Star seemed a lot like kissing his sister, if he had one. Now, it seemed very much real. She felt similar to Jackie in so many ways, yet different to. Despite Star's surprising strength, she was smaller and felt more vulnerable than Jackie, fitting into his arms like a delicate girl needing shelter rather than a wild and wide-eyed magical princess from another dimension. Her kiss was earnest and chaste, insisting without ever trying to take more than he was willing to give, drawing out feelings within him that he had thought were buried and forgotten. Star just wasn't an option, romantically. She was a beautiful princess with a bright, royal future ahead of her. He didn't have a place in it, not like this. And his feelings for Jackie were not a lie, he'd always had them, wanted to share them with her.

But Star had been right, again. There was something undeniable between them. Something that just wouldn't stay hidden, even if it was best left that way. Even now he found he couldn't break her kiss, couldn't pull himself away from those soft, sugary lips until she brought an end to the moment herself, tears streaming down her face, whether from sadness or relief or hop, he couldn't be certain.

"And you want to tell me there's nothing there?" She asked, not with accusation but with authority. "It's there, Marco. It always has been."

"Star, I…I'm not sure where to begin. Jackie and I-"

"I should've seen this coming!" The princess interrupted, wearing a heartbroken expression as though Happiness itself had been cancelled. "I should've seen this coming and I didn't. I mean, I did, but I thought I didn't. I thought I was fine with it and-and I'm not. I'm just not. Worse, I...I don't want to be okay with this, Marco. I've given it a lot of thought and-and why aren't we more than friends anyway? We tell each other everything, we know each other's secrets, we pick each other up. Why would we ever want to introduce other people into this that just-just come between everything! So, there. That's pretty much it. Now you know. I want to be happy for you. I do. But I'm not. I'm miserable. And the happier I see you without me, the more miserable I I had to tell you now, before it was too late. Even though I know this probably means you'll hate me for spying on you and for...for Starring things up like I always do. It's what I do. I come into your life and I screw it up! And yet I still hope that it'll work. I still think in spite of what I've done and said, that there must be some chance. Some hope that it isn't too late. Even watching you look at me with those sad brown eyes while I sit her blathering on because I know if I stop talking you'll turn me down and our friendship probably won't survive this and-and you just have to know. What hurts the most is that I have to tell you this. Because I shouldn't have to. It's there. It's been right there between us from the start and you just don't see it. You don't see it. Or you don't want to. What am I supposed to do with that, Marco? What else can I do but make a mess like I always do? You're not giving me another option here."

"Star…"

"What?" She asked, letting loose a sob. This had been it. Her only play. The last card she had been holding. Marco would end up going with his Jackie and she'd be left holding the bag. Once again, she'd Starred everything up, maybe for the last time. It was all so awful, so dreadful. Her eyes filled with tears and Marco held her a little tighter, which only seemed to make matters worse. "Tell me you feel something." She whispered. "Tell me I didn't just trade away what's left of our friendship for nothing."

"I do feel something, that's what I've been trying to tell you."

She dared not to believe those words, and she gripped the collar of his shirt, eyes widely looking into his. "What did you say?"

"I said you're right. There's something between us Star."

To say that the hug the princess favored the boy with as her eyes lit up and her breath inhaled was "bone-crushing" would be something of an understatement. She gripped the boy as though he would disappear if she deigned to let go, refusing to relinquish him.

"But you know I have feelings for Jackie, too. I can't just-just forget about them because of this."

The blonde loosened her grip, looking up into his eyes, her own were still full of tears, but no longer hopeless. "I'm not asking you to." She sniffled. "I just want you to-I just wanted some acknowledgement." Her voice dropped to a whisper again. "I don't know where we even go from here. I'm not asking you to break up with Jackie." She reiterated. "I just don't want to be ignored anymore."

"I could never ignore you, Star." The boy smirked, running a hand through her hair. "You're impossible to ignore. You insist upon yourself. But I've had these feelings for Jackie for a long time. I need to see where they go."

"What about where our feelings go?" She asked, clinging a little tighter.

Marco let out a sigh. "I dunno, Star. I just don't right now. I…I'd like to find out but-but I need time to process this and figure out how I feel about everything. I can't give you a clear answer right now."

"When can you?" She asked. It was with a sincere, honest voice, not a hint of impatience or annoyance.

"I-I don't know, Star. I just don't know."

She waited, processing his non-answer, hope and fear pulling at her in equal directions. She took his right hand in her own and pressed her lips to it before releasing the boy from her grip. "Then where do we go from here?"

Outside Marco's bedroom, a moon shone brightly, as though defying the night, while a slight breeze made the tree branches sway back and forth. And like so many months earlier, Princess Star Butterfly of Mewni had once more let herself into Marco Diaz's life without an invitation, tossing it into disarray and making the boy question everything he thought that he knew, and with it went all easy answers.

Star stood attentively, toes curling into the hardwood floor of his room, awaiting an answer that they boy couldn't find. He stood across from her, trying to meet her gaze and say something that didn't feel like a half-measure, or a betrayal of one of the two most important girls in his life, but nothing would come, nothing seemed to make any sense.

Star waited on tenterhooks, Marco could not meet her gaze, and the night kept racing towards dawn as it wrapped the two of them within the chains of love. All was as it should be.

Author's Notes

Why yes, yes I am ending it on that note. Does that make me a horrible person? Perhaps, but I went into it with the decision not to have a resolution. I didn't want this to be a story where Star breaks Marco and Jackie up. I wanted the resolution to be left to interpretation. These are big decisions for a fourteen year old boy to make, and he needs time to process the ramifications of what exactly is happening, and that things aren't entirely what he has thought them to be.

And so ends my first foray into writing for SvTFOE. I'd thought long and hard about this for some time. There is so much I can say about the characters in this series, but I wasn't sure what I wanted to do. Hell, to be truthful, I've had a Gravity Falls fic in my head for like three years now—which the series canon managed not to make unworkable—and I still have not been sure how to approach it and left it largely unwritten save for notes. I'm not going to reveal the details of that here, but for those that no me best, I simply titled it "More Than Anything In The World." Make of that what you will.

Back to Star, though, I have to reveal that I've completely fallen in love with this Mewman princess, especially when I see her heartbroken. Star wears all of her emotions on her sleeve. She is hauntingly beautiful, and her tears actually make her even moreso. I don't wish ill on her, but I just can't stop looking at images of her heart being cleft in twain. Her beauty and fragility haunt me. Again, maybe this makes me a terrible person, but that is a chance that I am willing to take.

One thing is for certain, I can't wait to see where she goes, how she continues to develop, and what path her life will take as her tapestry is woven by the choices and trials she faces. May the show run several more seasons!

Oh, and, well, I guess this technically isn't my first foray into SvTFOE fiction. I confess, I've co-written something of a more adult nature for her on an archive reserved for those naughty, spicy stories that don't belong here at FFN. The pen name probably gives it away if you've come across it (or plan to!). More is in progress on that saucy little story as well. So yeah, expect more from me regarding the beautiful and enigmatic Star Butterfly.

Until next time, leave your questions, comments, compliments, complaints, love letters, death threats, marriage proposals, and ransom demands with:

Lord Malachite

2/14/17

3:08AM

E-mail: ranger(underscore)writer

AIM: Asukaphile26

Discord: Lord Malachite

Inspirational Playlist For The Story:

The Police—Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic

Queen—Pain Is So Close To Pleasure

Billy Joel—Blonde Over blue

Rihanna—What Now?

Coldplay—Magic

Anna Nalick—Breaking The Girl

Genesis—Invisible Touch

Journey—Who's Crying Now?

Johnny Hates Jazz—Shattered Dreams 12" Extended Mix

Gin Blossoms—Hey Jealousy

Coldplay—Shiver

Gordon Lightfoot—If You Could Read My Mind

The Divine Comedy—Lost Property

Aimee Mann—Wise Up

Seal—This Could Be Heaven

Amanda Palmer—Have To Drive

Buffalo Springfield—Expecting To Fly