A/N: so we get into some sexual content in this chapter but i'm holding off on the threesome because this is actually a story about the last week of Jonathan's life and how he gets to know Jace and his sister in that time before he dies. I'm telling you right now this story is going to make you cry, I've already written the ending and it made me cry.

I had been washed by the sea, cleansed, baptized, purified, and dried clean and crisp by the sun

Sylvia Plath

It's nearly midnight when I can sneak back into the infirmary. Jace is out cold, and I'm pretty tired myself. When I pad into the infirmary Jon is asleep. I'm disappointed but determined. All the beds in the infirmary are tiny so I can just barely squeeze into one while he sleeps. I hope I'm not hurting him.

But the answer to the question comes too soon. Jonathan gives a soft whimper from his half asleep state and I instantly feel guilty for not giving him his space.

Sleepily, he mumbles, "You squished me."

I haven't heard anything so cute in ages. You squished me. I giggle and kiss his cheek.

"Sis you reek of sex." Jon grumbles at me, looking at me through his long silvery lashes.

"Sorry. Jace missed me." I say flushing deeply. There was something in his voice a few moments ago. Like he'd wished he was the one who'd made me reek of sex and not Jace. But that can't be right?

The car magazine is in my hand and I slide it onto the table by his glass of water. "I meant to come back sooner with this but… I was occupied."

He shakes his head. "He makes you really happy doesn't he?"

I beam a little, "He does."

"Could I have ever made you that happy?" He asks me and I wonder for a moment. It's sad to think about and I don't know if I completely understand the question. Jace makes me a different kind of happy than Jonathan could ever make me… right? He's my brother. Still… the sensation of his lips on mine bubbles to surface of my conscious and I think I understand what he's talking about.

"Maybe we shouldn't talk about this… I don't want you to be sad." I say, hoping it will show him I don't want to be sad either.

"I'm not sad… I just want you. I've always wanted you. Even now that the demon blood is burned out of me I know that my love for you is real."

I turn to leave.

"Please! Whatever this is, I don't have much time to explore it. Jace never has to know. If I survive longer than a week they're going to execute me anyway. I'm just here to be interrogated by the clave. You know there's nothing that can come from it."

I sigh, tears threatening to spill over. "Jonathan." I say it like a prayer and I lean into him, and press my lips desperately to his. I open my mouth to his and let his tongue twist with mine. My fingers tangle in his silvery blonde locks and I feel happiness sing through me. His body is warm and hard against mine and my mind is churning over the reasons this is bad. I can't begin to describe what is making me do this but I know he's not forcing me. There's no enchantment, no spell that is making me and I know I'm ready to push it a little further. My hand ghosts up the inside of his thin shirt and goes along the side of his ribs. I don't want to brush against the wound so I'm sticking to the side of his ribs. He sighs and it feels like a sigh of pleasure…

He sneaks his hand under the soft material of my shirt and I know I'm not ready to go this far just yet. I break the kiss. "Look I don't want to rush this." I say breathlessly.

"But we don't have a lot of time. I could die tomorrow." Jonathan says, his voice a little raspy.

He's right and I feel so many emotions about the brother I never knew. This good, kind man that loves me and I want to make things right. Most of all I want to make sure he knows I love him and I love the idea that the same boy who had threatened to burn down the world was now rising above it all. I want to tell him how much I love him, so I do.

Jonathan's hand is falling away from underneath my shirt. I take his hand and place it lightly on my breast. "Please Jonathan, make me feel good."

His eyes widen and his pupils dilate with lust. "I can try." He whispers to me. He pulls my shirt over my head and lets it fall to floor. It's chilly in the infirmary and thankfully he knows this and pulls me down under the covers. I settle on top of him, my hips hovering over his groin. I hold myself up and he reaches around me, unclasping my bra.

I hear footsteps heading toward the infirmary and I swear under my breath. Jonathan obviously didn't hear anything so I whisper "Someone's coming."

I stuff my bra and shirt back on and make to walk out. I stop and peck Jonathan on the lips. The curtain to Jonathan's bed is pulled back and Jace is standing there, half naked and looking ruefully down at me.

"I thought you were up to something when I heard you leave." Jace's voice is like a bucket of cold water over my head and the spell is broken. It dawns on me what I was just about to do with my brother.

"I'm sorry Jace." Clary said, biting her lip so she wouldn't cry.

"It's ok! I don't exactly think keeping your dying brother company is a crime." I smile, I'm relieved he didn't see anything. He fist bumps with Jonathan and sits down in the chair next to the bed.

"I should go Jon."

"Yeah ok. Thanks for the magazine." He says smirking up at me.

I ruffle his ivory hair and plant a kiss on his cheek. "Sorry for waking you up. I'll bring you breakfast in the morning."

"Thanks sis. Goodnight Jace."

We stroll out of the infirmary and I cast one backwards glance, Jonathan blows me a kiss and I feel my heart flutter.

That morning I wake up late. I look up at the clock and it stares at me reading 9:58. "Damn it." I say, throwing the covers off me. I know no one has brought Jonathan breakfast and he must be starving by now. I hurry to dress and run a brush through my knotted curls. I slip into my clothes and get my shoes on.

Jace is when the kitchen when I stumble in. "Hey sleeping beauty." He smirks at me.

"Why didn't you wake me up?" I snap at him. "I have to take care of Jonathan you know?"

Jace looks hurt. "I thought because you were up late you'd want to sleep in."

I sigh, "Sorry." I peck him sweetly on the lips and hug him close for a minute. But there's not time for me to really smooch him. I pull some eggs from the fridge and take a skillet from the cupboard.

"Could you go sit with him or just tell him his breakfast is coming?" I ask as sweetly as I can. Today marks the second day since Jon was stabbed by my own hand. I'm worried he's going to be in pain when I get to him.

"Of course." He replies. "I didn't know you were so domestic baby." Jace says with a smirk. I know he's trying to keep things light hearted but I don't feel that way so it grates on my nerves. He leans in close to my ear as I start cracking eggs in the fry pan.

"I'll stand by you no matter what happens ok?" He whispers sweetly in my ear and I flush brightly. I reward him with another peck on the lips.

"I know. It just… hurts." I mumble, adjusting the heat on the burner.

"Losing a sibling isn't supposed to be easy baby." Jace says. I'm thankful we're the only people around. Alec is at Magnus's house and Izzy is with Simon.

I take some Italian bread out of the bread box and slice it up. I don't know what to say. I pop it in the toaster and the time on the stove glares at me again. "Please go tell him I'm coming." I can't talk about this right now.

"I'm going." He puts his breakfast dishes in the sink and gently slaps my ass.

I smirk at him as he leaves and flip jonathan's eggs. I have no idea how he likes them but I like mine dry. His toast pops up and I fish out some sausages from the freezer and microwave them. When I'm done he's got two fried eggs (dry), toast and four sausages. I grab a mug of coffee and hope he drinks it black.

Jace and Jon are talking animatedly when I get in. Jon grins up at me. "I'm sorry I slept in." I say as I set down his breakfast.

"I did too, I've only been awake for about half an hour. Clary, you don't have to play nursemaid to me. I'm a 17 year old boy I can look after myself."

I quirk a skeptical eyebrow at him. "Right, how exactly are you supposed to take care of yourself with a gaping wound in your chest?"

He flushed and took his fork, stuffing a piece of egg in his mouth. "That's what I thought." I say, smirking at him.

I sit on the edge of Jon's bed and wonder if Magnus would come over with some of that salve for Jon again today.

[ outgoing text ; M. Bane ] Could you come over with some of that magic slave you gave Jonathan yesterday?

[ incoming text ; M. Bane ] Yes, I'll portal over soon. How does he look?

[ outgoing text ; M. Bane ] Pale, tired.

[ incoming text ; M. Bane ] We should discuss what happens when the enchantment wears off.

[ outgoing text ; M. Bane ] I thought… he would die?

[ incoming text ; M. Bane ] He will. But I'd like to discuss the specifics with you and Jonathan.

I set my phone down. I must look upset because Jon stops eating and Jace is looking at me. "What is it sis?" Jon asks me.

"Magnus is coming over with some salve for your rune. H-he's also coming o-over to discuss what happens when the enchantment fails." I choke out, I feel hot tears prick my eyes and I wipe my eyes against my sweater. Damn it.

"Baby don't cry." Jace coos slipping his hand in with mine.

Jonathan looks at me guiltily. It's not his fault he's dying. Actually, it's mine and guilt wracks my nerves. There's a knock on the main infirmary door. Magnus knows we're in here.

"Come on in Magnus." I call from Jonathan's bed.

Magnus, in all his glory, wearing dark eyeliner six inches thick and a bright purple and gold shirt comes into the infirmary with a small jar and I see Alec lurking in the hallway.

He opens the curtain to Jonathan's bed and asks, "How's the patient?"

Jon shrugs. "It hurts. But not as bad as yesterday."

"I'm going to leave the salve with you guys. You can use it as often as you want." Magnus says.

"Thanks Magnus."

"Now, the enchantment I cast yesterday will start slipping towards the end of the week. I want you guys to be mentally prepared for what happens when the enchantment slips. Jonathan will have about thirty minutes to live when the enchantment slips or however long it takes for him to bleed out. Clary I know this will be hard on you. Maybe later today you could take Jonathan out? A trip to Central Park might be a good idea. He'd have to go in a wheelchair but I'm sure you guys could handle it."

I didn't know what to say? Magnus was looking at me strangely and I was feeling a little lightheaded. "I think I'm going to pass out."

Jace was there to catch me as a fell off the bed. When I open my eyes I'm in an infirmary bed next to Jonathan. I blink several times and hear Jon call out to me. "What happened?"

"I just got really dizzy." I pop out of the bed and Jace is on me in a second.

"What do you think you're doing missy? Get back in that bed!" He says worriedly

"Jace I'm fine, I was just shocked." Apparently I wasn't out that long because Magnus is still there.

"You alright biscuit?" Magnus asks

"I'm fine you guys. Jace, can Jon wear some of your clothes? We can visit the cotton candy stand in Central Park if you want?"

Jon looked excited. "I'd like that."

"Yes, of course. I'll go grab you some jeans and a sweater. I think I have a spare coat for you to wear too." Jace said generously. I wondered if he knew how much it meant to me that he seemed to know Jon wasn't Sebastian and that Jon was my brother as he should have been. I feel sadness pang at my heart that he has less than a week to live but here we are.

I peck his cheek, "Thanks honey." Sometime during our exchange Magnus has disappeared and I wonder if he knows how thankful I am for him. When I look at Jon I see he's smiling.

Jace leaves us alone and I take the salve, twist off the top and pull down the sheet and pull up Jon's shirt. He winces but I hush him. I go to the sink and clean my hands, not that it matters much but I don't want him to get sick. When I come back he looks cold. "Sorry it'll only take me a second."

There's a gaping wound staring back at me, a wound I made. I feel terrible but at the same time I know it was necessary. I wouldn't have Jon as he is now if it hadn't been Heosphoros and the heavenly fire. I should probably change his dressing too. I gently apply the salve to the edges of the wound and try not to look at Jon's face. I know I'm hurting him.

I go and grab gauze and and medical tape from the infirmary cupboard. The old bandages aren't soaked with blood as I suppose they should be. This is Magnus's work. Magnus explained the enchantment to me when we returned from Edom but I think I was too upset to really listen. By the time I'm done removing the old bandages Jonathan looks to be in a fair bit of pain. I apply more of the salve to his wound. Jon's face eases slightly. "Thanks baby girl."

I flush from the endearment. I finish bandaging him up and Jace comes in with a change of clothes. I know he needs help changing. God, I wish things hadn't been the way they had. I wish Jonathan wasn't looking at me like he pities me and above all I wish Jace didn't know how much this hurts me. I sniffle a little and take the clothes from Jace.

"I'll help you get changed-" I murmur but Jace interrupts with, "Shouldn't I help him get changed? I mean him and I kind of have the same parts."

I blush crimson. "I'm his sister -" But Jonathan scoffs, "I'm probably going to need to lean on both of you to get dressed and get in the wheelchair so don't even think about arguing about this right now."

I sigh. "I'll get a warm cloth and we can try to get you clean." I go over to the sink and fill up a basin with warm water and a little soap. I find the softest cloth we have and set it down next to his bed.

We strip him down to nothing, making sure the curtain around his bed is covering everything. Not that anyone would want to look but still, I want Jonathan to have as much privacy as he can. I dip the cloth in the warm, soapy water and run it across his hard stomach, steering clear of the wound in his chest. I get his hands and arms and let Jace do his face. There's something between them, something I don't quite understand when Jace cleans his face almost lovingly. He takes his time and Jace leans in slightly and I think… but no! Jace wouldn't. He hates Jonathan.

But then Jonathan is leaning in too and they kiss, almost chaste and I'm stunned by how beautiful it is. Jace's damp hand reaches out to me as they break away from the kiss. "I know Jonathan wants to kiss you Clary." I can see Jonathan starting to stiffen. Jace starts on Jonathan's… bits and I wonder if I can do it? Can I kiss Jonathan with my boyfriend, probably the man I will marry, right here? I lean in and pucker my lips his lips feel soft as clouds and he's tangled his lithe fingers in my red curls. Jonathan probes my lips with his tongue and I want to reciprocate, so I do. Our tongues dance, our lips sealing them together and I wonder if Jace is watching… from what I can see he's stopped washing Jonathan's thigh and is looking up at us in wonder. God, I want them both to take me. Maybe it's too much to ask of my weak brother but I definitely want it. I pull away from Jonathan and whisper. "Let's go to the park and finish getting you washed up and then, tonight. Yes."

Jonathan beams at me and Jace is smirking too. In a backhanded way Jonathan is kind of his brother too and I think he understands my need to be close to him, to give myself up to him before this all comes to an end.

It's about noon when we finally get to Central Park. Jonathan is being pushed around by Jace since I'm not strong enough. Jonathan looks like a kicked puppy because he can't walk around. We get him to stand up at the institute and nothing terrible happened. Still, it was a long way to Central Park from Brooklyn so I figure better safe than sorry. We wheel through the park and Jon holds my hand. "Do you want blue or pink cotton candy?" I say, getting a ten out of my wallet.

"Well since I'm not a girl I'd say blue." Jace snorts inelegantly and I give them a look.

"You might have liked cherry cotton candy, how am I to know these things?" I say asking the man at the stand for two blue cotton candies and a pink one.

We find a bench and I open my bag of cotton candy, it sticks to my hands like a cotton ball made of sugar. Jon seems to be enjoying his. Jace is being a dork and is trying to feed me his blue cotton candy and I wonder if this is what heaven is like. Well, I hope heaven's a bit warmer because the December air is freezing me out but this seems to be about as good as it gets.