Riley begins spending more time with him after that, probably as a side-effect of Maya's perpetual absence. Riley seems irrevocably lost without her, and he wants so badly to make her feel better, to take her mind off the loss of her best friend. But as much as he wishes he could, he doesn't know how to fix things between her and Maya, so he settles for spending afternoons after school with her and making her laugh as many times a day as he can. It's all he knows to do. Most days, they like to study at her place, textbooks and snacks spread out on the rug, and if they're lucky Lucas shows up, too—but less and less often. When they pass him in the hallways he's laughing with other people now, but he still spares them a quick wave if they happen to catch his eye.

"Farkle, look at this," Riley sighs, sliding her phone over to him so he can see a 8-second clip of Lucas making out with some girl—a freshman, Farkle thinks, who's got one arm up to film the whole thing and the other thrown around Lucas's neck. Farkle makes a face. "Yeah, I know," she groans, widening her eyes in mock horror. "But I mean, he seems happy… I just want Lucas to be happy."

"I know, Riles. I know," he says, passing the phone back. As she takes it and turns back to her trigonometry, a sad little smile plays at the corners of her lips.

Other days, they turn out the lights and sit at Farkle's windows to watch the city pulsing with life beneath them, because it endlessly fascinates her and he loves that. It gets dark early in the city this time of year, and the city lights blink to life like a million promises—Riley's words, not his. This is what they are doing when it happens.

In Manhattan's glow, her fingertips brush the back of his hand all soft, and the shock causes him lose sight of the airplane his eyes have been tracking through the sky for a full minute. But he's afraid to look at her because he's uncertain of what he just felt, and his heart is beginning to beat faster in his chest as thoughts stream through his mind—she was sitting too far earlier to reach him, so she must have moved closer, so if he really felt what he thought he felt it must've been intentional on her part, which must mean what's coming next is-

And then she takes his hand, curling tentative fingers between his. He stills.

"Riley?" he whispers, without turning.

"Hi." A pause. "Is this okay?"

He blinks and looks at her. Her eyes have gone wide as if she's surprised herself and he briefly recalls a night not too long ago, when there were four friends waiting for midnight at a playground, before everything started to fracture.

"Farkle?" she asks. He shakes his head, forgets what he was thinking about. Squeezes her hand.

"Why wouldn't it be okay? I've always loved you, you know that, right?" It's true. He used to tell her all the time that he was in love with both her and Maya, and he meant it with his whole heart every time. But the moment that thought crosses his mind, he frowns, because the way he feels about her is different now than it was back then. He used to idolize her, adore her, and… that's not what this is about anymore. He feels his expression soften as he glances at her, waiting for her reply.

"I guess I never really paid attention to you until this year. I was so wrapped up in myself and who I thought I needed that I took you for granted, even though my entire life you've been a better friend to me than I've been for you," she haltingly admits. He's lost for words—she seems to have that effect on him lately- so he turns back to the glass with a quiet smile resting on his face and finds another airplane for his eyes to follow. She breathes out a sigh. Five minutes pass until her soft, bright voice tears him away from the skyline again.

"Funny that it took everybody else leaving to make me realize how important you are to me. I mean, I thought Maya and I were forever, you know? And now…"

His reply is the answer to her unspoken question, hanging in the air between them. "Don't worry, I'm not going anywhere." He squeezes her hand again and she squeezes back, and he swears he has never felt so at home with anyone before. He's always been the odd one out, the know-it-all; the discomfort of not belonging has shadowed him his entire life. But somehow, in this moment, all of that hardly seems real anymore: the world has faded away, leaving only him and Riley with their favorite city skyline laid out in front of them like a photograph brought to life. They sit like that, unmoving, together, watching their city from above until her parents call to tell her it's late and she should be getting home. Typical of her, she goes without a complaint, but not before throwing her arms around his neck again.

"Thanks, Farkle," she whispers, breath warm against his skin. And then she's out the door.

It is the night before her seventeenth birthday, and tomorrow night she'll sit at dinner surrounded by her family so he takes her out to her favorite taco place uptown for an early celebration of their own. Afterwards, they opt for the long way home, winding their way through the city's brightly-lit, busy streets and stopping by a few places that capture her interest. It's late and they are still far from home by the time they skirt the lower half of Central Park, turning onto a row of brownstones.

As they walk side by side, he happens to glance at her the moment she hears the faint music drifting from one of the houses at the far end of the street. With most people, when something unexpected makes them happy their faces light up; with Riley, everything sparks with joy- from the tips of her fingers all the way to her eyebrows. In an instant, she is dragging him by the hand towards the melody, and he is running without ever having meant to. As they draw closer, he picks out the sound of a trumpet, warbling wistfully—he is trying to place the song when, panting, she slows to a stop in the golden glow of a streetlamp, then abruptly pivots to face him.

"Dance with me," she begs. He hesitates – he's no dancer. She must sense his apprehension because she tugs at his hand and adds, "It's just me, Farkle. I'm so clumsy I trip on flat ground and when I get too excited my arms swing around and whack people entirely of their own accord; what's there to be afraid of?"

As he obliges, he's smiling because she's right. And it's awkward at first, because they are both unsure and self-conscious, but eventually they grow comfortable and he forgets himself. It's a slow song, an old one that he's pretty sure is meant to be romantic, but neither of them has much of a sense of rhythm so it hardly makes a difference. He learns that every time he twirls her, she giggles, and so he twirls her again and again until they're both breathless with laughter. His cheeks are aching when she pulls him close and he realizes that they must've been there for a while, because the music is no longer playing and the sounds of the city have filled the street again without him noticing.

Funny how that happens. He's the type of person who doesn't tend to let anything escape his attention, but somehow when his mind is occupied with her everything else becomes background noise. How could he be thinking about anything in this moment other than the way her arms are wrapped around his neck? His hands rest on her lower back; he's certain if he leans in their noses will touch.

They are swaying side to side in some strange sort of slow dance and he wonders what she is thinking; with anyone else he would be talking to fill the silence but this kind of quiet only makes him feel closer to her. All he can smell is the faint scent of strawberry shampoo as he considers lifting his right hand to brush her hair back. It's covering the necklace that was his early birthday gift to her and it makes him giddy to see the little golden sun pendant resting in the dip of her collarbone; it's like witnessing his very own miracle, it never gets old.

Before he can move, a beep from his watch signals the beginning of her birthday. It startles him; he didn't think they'd been out so long.

"Happy seventeenth, Riley," he murmurs. A smile spreads across her face. He's almost sure he meant to say something else, but then all the thoughts running through his head evaporate, because she has risen to her tiptoes and is gently pulling on his neck so that he tilts his face downwards. It happens so fast he forgets to breathe, and the last thing he sees before he closes his eyes to kiss her for the first time are her eyes as they widen, deep brown and glowing with lamplight. In them, he sees the briefest flash of his face reflected back at him, and the thought crosses his mind that the person he is in her eyes is a better version of himself than he could've ever imagined. He hopes maybe the same is true for her.

In the seconds that follow, like a pair of stars spinning closer and closer together, they succumb to the inevitable force pulling them near. It's as natural and irresistible as gravity. They collide, slowly at first and then softly again and again until he is dizzy with her, with the way he can feel her smile against his lips as if she can't contain her joy.

The next day, she asks him out. They don't tell anyone, but somehow people know just by seeing them together- maybe it's something in the way he looks at her with eyes full of newfound wonder, or the way she glows when she's near him. It still hurts that their friends aren't here for this, and he's not sure if he'll ever stop wondering why they grew apart. He knows she feels the same way; it hangs between them sometimes, this unspoken sense of loss that somehow makes him feel even closer to her. They're the only people he wants to tell about these precious moments when he falls for her all over again, during the first few months where everything feels new and exciting and they wander the streets of their hometown hand in hand. Even after that, when they begin to settle into a new, comfortable rhythm of familiarity, everything he feels for her only seems to grow.

She is the most fascinating person alive, he's sure of it. Every day he discovers new layers and facets of her that he never knew could exist, and in turn, she reveals to him the brightest, softest parts of his own heart. After a day spent wandering the city hand in hand, he relives his favorite memories of her on the walk back to his building; even after he kicks off his shoes and flops into bed her grin is still seared on his heart. He stares at the ceiling in the dark and marvels at the way they click, at the way she could do anything and he would still feel the same way about her. Even on her bad days, even the afternoon they have their first fight and they both end up crying, all he has to do is look at her and his heart feels like it's going to spill over with emotion, because what they have matters to him so much.

He never believed in forever before this. Sound reason always told him it was scientifically impossible, not to mention irrelevant because of the fleeting length of the human life. To him, forever used to represent a concept too enormous for the mind to grasp, let alone experience. But now, the way Riley laughs at the strangest things and believes the best about absolutely everything time and time again fills him with something that says otherwise.

One quiet night, he is alone on the elevator down from her apartment when he decides that, maybe, you know what the best kind of forever must be like when you spend a day drifting in and out of comfortable silence with the person you feel closest to in the world.

Because sometimes friendships end, and you turn around to find that suddenly people you thought you knew better than the back of your hand have become strangers. But if she has taught him anything it's to keep trusting in the good in the world, in other people and, above all, in the soul that is Riley Matthews. He never thought something so inexplicably beautiful could come from so much fracture and drift, but somehow that is exactly what has grown between them- like a cluster of yellow flowers bursting from a crack in the sidewalk- ordinary, yes, but filled with light.

A/N Hope you enjoyed! Maybe I'll write some more in the future if yall would be down to read. Reviews are greatly appreciated so post me one if you liked this, thanks!

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