Disclaimer: I don't own Steven Universe!

Title: It Starts off Small

Summary: Things come to a head when Amethyst starts teaching Steven fusion tips

Chapter Title: Epilogue- Feeling Big

...

Pearl glances up from her book as the steady pounding of the shower turns off with a twist. It's one of Connie's books, and remarkably confusing, if only because of how disgustingly illogical the timeline is. As much as she appreciates her pupil, the Gem finds her taste in books to not be her own.

Amethyst kicks open the door and steps into the cool living room. She's naked, which is something Pearl can appreciate. There's something oddly indulgent about looking at her tummy, the stretch marks that pepper her purple skin, even that small patch of freckles Pearl knows she hates. Her long mane is tied up and dripping, only just barely toweled.

"Nice shower?" She asked.

"Yup." Amethyst flashed her clothes on with a flourish. She's not, Pearl notices, dry. Perhaps she just likes letting the air do the work for her. "Been a while since I did that."

"Well, it's not like you have to. We can shapeshift all that off." Pearl supplies, watching the woman trail into the kitchen area. She expects her to go straight to the fridge, but instead she pulls the kettle out of the cupboards. "Making tea?"

"I forgot how much I liked it 'till recently." She says with a verbal shrug, setting it on the stove. Water from the sink sloshed around inside. "You want me to get a cup out for you? I know how you like the smell."

Pearl doesn't deny this. Tea has a nice aroma to it, and the warmth of a cup in her hands is appealing. "No, thank you. I might make myself some later."

"Cool."

Amethyst waits for the kettle to boil, then pours herself a cup, bringing the concoction over to the couch. She nonchalantly crawls up beside her, swishing the bag around. Pearl knows she likes her drink particularly strong.

She glanced outside. The sun was just beginning to set, leaving blazing pinks and reds at the seams of the sky. Pearl thought the ocean looked its' best at night- fathomless and mysterious- but the dark blue of now wasn't that bad either. "Garnet should be home soon."

"She took Steven for ice cream at, what? Noon?" Amethyst snorted. "They're probably off talking about their feelings, or whatever."

Pearl looked at her. Amethyst flipped the soggy tea bag into her mouth with a particularly repulsive squelch. "Speaking of feelings-"

"Ugh, Pearl, no. This is supposed to be happy tea time."

"Relax. I'm not prying. I just wanted to apologize. I feel like I haven't really been there for you, recently. You or Steven."

"S'okay, P." Amethyst sipped loudly at her cup. "You can't be there 24/7. I just stood aside while you all were fighting."

"That's the problem. I was here 24/7, but I didn't do anything."

"What else were you gonna do?" Amethyst asks.

"I don't know."

"Then don't worry."

Pearl accepts this with a guilty nod. Amethyst goes on nursing her mug.

"How're things going with you and that one girl?" She probes finally. "The hot one."

"Amethyst."

"Chill, Pearl. She's not my type."

Pearl tsks. "Courting is something best done privately, Amethyst. It's not to be gossiped about."

"Whatever gets your gem glowin', I guess."

Pearl's cheeks flame. "Really, Amethyst?" She questions, scandalized by her provocative tone. "Really?"

"Yes, pearly pear. Really."

"I'm not going to answer that."

"So, either you're really going, or you haven't even called her yet. Got it."

Pearl finds herself smirking. Two can play at this game. "I can't help it if you're jealous of my skills, Amethyst," she teased. "Perhaps I can help 'set you up' next time."

"Yeah, sure." She agreed, shrugging. The tea in her mug is half gone now. "Bird mom wingwoman for me? Sounds perfect."

"You're serious?"

"Yup. Gotta warn you, though; most of the places I go to party dance how I like to dance."

Pearl bites her lip. The smaller Gem's way of dancing isn't wrong- all dancing is good dancing. She just prefers showing off her form in more subtle ways; the shake of her shoulders, the flexibility in her pose. Amethyst's movements are like water, jagged and loose; you admire it, but you also fear it. She leaves nothing to the imagination. It's intoxicating, when it's with friends. But random strangers? Not so much.

"Could we settle for another concert?" She compromised. "Or even an ice rink?"

"Sure."

"Are you okay? You're being a bit too agreeable for comfort."

Amethyst shrugs, thick shoulders rolling. She leans against Pearl's side with a comfortable sigh, long hair tickling her pale skin. "Stuff's been all 'bout me, recently. I'm sick of it. All I want is a belly full of tea and to take a nap."

Pearl studied the liquid sloshing around in her mug curiously. "Does it feel nice?"

"If you enjoy drinking, yeah. It's like having a blanket in your insides."

"I see. I guess I can see the attraction in that." She hooked an arm around the Gem's side and squeezed. She felt warm and soft and a bit damp to the touch. "It's okay for things to be about you, you know."

"Nooo. This is happy tea time. Not 'let's talk about our issues' time."

"Too bad." She reached over, plucking the mug from her chubby hands and setting it on the coffee table. "There."

Amethyst wailed a ridiculously over-dramatic, "Nooooooooo" as she 'attempted' to retrieve her tea, windmilling her arms around.

"You done?"

"One more. Noooooooooooooooo!" She sighed, falling against the thin woman's side. "Fine. Now I'm done."

"Good. So, how's your week been?"

"Are you serious?"

"We haven't catched up recently. I'm allowed to ask these things."

"Pearl, we've inhabited the same air all week. You know how my week's been."

She hesitated. "Physically, yes, but I'm asking emotionally. You tend to brush over those things."

Amethyst huffs out a laugh and falls silent. Pearl watches her slowly breathe. Is she asleep? It wouldn't be the first time Amethyst has conked out on her lap. If she started drooling, she'd swiftly find herself deposited on the floor.

"I'm thinking about taking a break from fusion." She says quietly, as though testing the air for softness before filling it with words. "For the most part, anyway."

"Are you mad at me?"

"What? No. Why?"

"I didn't want this to be because of my prying."

"It's not."

"Okay."

"Even if it was, would it matter?"

"No! No, of course not." Thin fingers settled in her pale mane. "It's your decision, and I respect that."

Her voice is achingly vulnerable. "You're not mad?"

"Not at all. Concerned more than anything. You know we aren't mad at you, right?"

"Right."

Softer, less convinced. "Right."

"Good."

She looked at her hands. "It's just... ulgh!" Amethyst pressed the palms to her face. "It's stupid."

"Personal preference isn't stupid, Amethyst."

"I like fusing. I do. I just need a break."

"That's okay, Amethyst. I understand."

Amethyst let out a quiet groan from her hands. Pearl reached out to nuzzle her hair, brushing her bangs out of the way of her eyes, which were a bit misty. "It's just," she sniffled a bit. "We've done this since I was little, you know? Jus' a newfound baby Amethyst. It doesn't feel right to just say no and walk away."

Pearl squeezed her tighter. "There's nothing wrong with saying no. It's okay."

"It's like cutting against the grain, almost. All rough and crummy-looking and stuff."

"Nobody says yes to fusion every single time it's on the table. Garnet said no. You've said no."

"Yeah, to Steven. And Garnet's a special case."

"We're all special cases, don't you think?"

That calms her a bit. Pearl went on. "It's strange to consider, but none of us would have ever even known each other on Homeworld. And, even if we did bump into each other, we could never be friends. A Quartz and a Pearl? The planet would blow up."

"A defective Quartz."

There's a pause. "Jasper?"

"Peridot, actually. She didn't mean any harm when she said it, though."

"I figured as much. Peridot's taken quite a shine to you, you know."

"Eh. She just likes me 'cause I'm short." Amethyst laughs into Pearl's arms. "Would we have known each other, on Homeworld? If I was brought back for some reason."

"No. They would've put you somewhere... for entertainment. Perhaps, if you showed enough promise, they'd stick you with some Rubies. Never anywhere near a Pearl."

"You'd think that'd be their first option?"

"You'd be surprised. The Diamonds' want perfection in their Pearls. It's almost a political thing; our Pearls are as perfect as we are, because we are grand enough to get perfect Pearls."

"You're not a trick or piece of jewelry to flaunt."

"I agree with you completely. That's just how things are on Homeworld. You would've been assigned somewhere just as remote as Pink Diamond's Zoo, and we never would have met. We probably wouldn't have ever even seen each other." Her chin was tickled by her long hair. "We- all of us. We're all truly special cases."

"Isn't that all the more reason to fuse?"

"Oh, don't fall into that old rhetoric. Garnet would never forgive you if she heard you talking like that."

The Gem shrunk in her arms. "M'sorry." She wiped a few tears away. "It's all so stupid."

"Not at all. You want your tea back?"

"S'please."

Pearl handed it over. Amethyst downed the lukewarm concoction like an alcoholic does vodka, setting the mug back onto the table. "I feel all numb now."

"Getting worked up'll do that."

"Sorry."

"Nothing to apologize for. You've done the exact same for me."

"I want to be a better Gem." She tells Pearl. Well, tells Pearl's sash, really. "And not just 'cause you told me to be, or Steven needs me to be. I wanna be better for me. I'm sick of spending my life feeling too much or not enough. I want to be able to take a shower and make myself some tea without feeling guilty. I mean, I'm the only one in the Temple who even really drinks tea!"

"Well, how do you feel now?"

"Guilty. But it didn't stop me."

"That's a start."

"I guess."

"I'm proud of you, Amethyst."

She smiles at that. "Thanks."

"May I ask?"

"Lemme guess; why fusion?"

"Yes. Is it... did we make you feel worse?"

"No," Amethyst answered bluntly. "But you didn't make me feel better, either. I need happy, positive junk right now. Fusion just wasn't it."

"I understand. Thank you for telling me."

"S'no biggie. I feel tired."

"Take a nap, then."

"No, like- body tired. My bod is sleepy, but my head isn't."

"Then stay here and rest."

"You don't mind?"

"I'm not moving anytime soon."

"Thanks."

Pearl busied herself with running her fingers through Amethyst's hair.

Author's Note: Heyo, the epilogue to the story I never planned having an epilogue for in the first place!

This was mostly inspired by my own disgruntlement towards my inability to write more Pearl in the story, as well as Amethyst's tea obsession (I thought she was joking when she told Vidalia tea was her favorite, but she's eaten three tea bags and drank two cups of it in-show by now), on top of her discussion with Steven in Tiger Philanthropist.

Now we're done with this story! Though I'm really proud of it, still.

Freckles came from Smoky's design (they're weirdly placed, like on her side or something), and somehow this ended up being 10x gayer than I thought it would be in the beginning.

-Mandaree1