Chapter 26 - Oscar...

AN

I know it's been a while, so thank you to anyone that's still interested and reading. I know I said that I would be wrapping this up soon, and I do plan to... in a way. I just was thinking of leaving it open ended to a degree, in case I get a spark of inspiration, to carry on. Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated, as my mind has started to drift onto other things. Anyway thank you and I hope you enjoy.

"Mummy..." he snivelled, it was almost like he couldn't decide if he wanted to cry or not.

"I'm here O... I'm here." Olivia said running her hand through his messy curls and down his back, hoping to soothe him.

She turned to look at Fitz who had just been stood there silently.

"Fitz?"

No response.

"Fitz." She said a bit louder, using her spare hand to reach for his.

"Sorry, what?" He said still looking between her and Oscar.

"Why is he crying like this? Fitz, what happened?"

"I don't know..." He said standing up but still looking directly at her. "I don't know, we were playing, he found me, Stevie called so I answered and he took off to find you."

"That's it?"

"Yeah... Then I heard him scream. I came running through, he was stood next to you and you were asleep..."

Then it hit him.

"You were asleep..." He said again as if it was completely clear.

"I'm sorry Fitz. I'm so tired, I know what we..."

"No. No, I didn't mean that."

Now Olivia was looking as puzzled as he was a moment ago.

Yeah, she was asleep. But what difference did that make?

"Hey O..." Fitz said kneeling in front of Olivia, so he was at eye level with Oscar. He gently rubbed his little legs. "Mummy was just asleep. She's okay look."

Then she realised.

This wasn't the first time Oscar had reacted like this to seeing Olivia asleep. That was something the were going to have to talk to him about, just not right now.

"Mu, Mummy." He hiccuped.

"Yeah baby, I'm here. It's alright." She said placing a soft kiss on top of his head.

The more Olivia reassured him, the more he started to calm down. Fitz stayed on the floor in front of them, still offering comfort to them.

"Are you tired O?" Fitz asked the little boy. "I know I am, and I bet Mummy is too. She was just having a little nap."

Oscar slightly nodded his head, confirming what Fitz already knew. He was exhausted, he was just about managing to keep his eyes open.

"How about then, we get into the big bed and all have a little sleep." Fitz said taking his eyes of Oscar and looked to Olivia.

"Yeah bud?"

"O... Okay." He said quietly.

It didn't take long before Oscar was fast asleep, and even though both Fitz and Olivia were tired they couldn't sleep, not now. They were just quiet. All of Olivia's focus was on Oscar, who was asleep on the bed between them, and all of Fitz' focus was on her.

"This is all my fault." Olivia quietly said breaking the silence.

"What? Liv,"

"No. It is."

"How? Tell me." Fitz said challenging her. He was desperate to know what was going through her mind.

"Think about it, Fitz."

"I am and I still don't see it. This isn't your fault."

Olivia huffed in annoyance. "Please stop saying that." She tried to turn away but couldn't, Oscars small weight on her arm was keeping her from doing so, she didn't want to disturb him by moving too much.

There was a brief moment of silence, where the two of them just looked at each other.

"If I would have just listened. To someone, anyone really. I was a stupid stubborn kid." She saw the look on Fitz' face. "It's true Fitz, and I know you know that. And this, all this started then. Me, then Abbs, Mellie, Jake, his brother and now Oscar. I caused this..." She trailed off.

"Livvie..." Fitz said reaching out to her. "You were a kid,"

"I was 17. I wouldn't class that as being a kid."

"You can't blame yourself. If you want to blame someone blame Jake Ballard. He caused this, not you. Mellie does, and we both know how she feels about all of this."

Silence.

"Just give it some thought... Please."

Fitz didn't want to pry anymore, but he wanted to know what was running through her mind. Did she still blame herself? She shouldn't, he knew that, but it was getting Liv to see that.

He was about to say something else when the small snores coming from Oscar stopped him.

He looked across to see that Olivia had her eyes closed, hopefully asleep already as she still needed the rest, for her recovery.

Fitz was woken by Oscar stirring, he glanced around looking for an indication of time but couldn't see anything. He didn't know whether to move or not. He didn't want to wake Oscar up, but he knew he wasn't going to be able to go back to sleep. Not now.

He stayed still for a while before eventually chancing it, gently lifting himself out of the bed, he silently moved away from the still sleeping Olivia and Oscar.

Once he was out of the room, he went to find his phone, remembering the last time he had it was, when he was speaking to Stephen, before he heard Oscar. Plugging it in to charge, he checked for any missed calls or messages. Noticing that he had several from both Abby and Stephen, he decided he needed to at least call Stephen to let him know what had happened.

"Hey..." Stephen said sleepily.

Fitz double checked the time. It wasn't that early was it?

"Hey. Are you awake?" He said smiling to himself, it was almost 11am in England.

"Huh? Fitz?" Stephen asked. "Is everything okay? What happened?"

"Yeah, everything's fine. Oscar just freaked a little."

"What happened?" Stephen said fully conscious now.

"Liv fell asleep when we were playing hide and seek with him, and he found her. He's a little sceptical. It's not the first time it's happened."

"Christ..." Stephen muttered into the phone.

"We're going to have a chat with him about it, but Liv, she's blaming herself for all this and Stevie, I don't know if I'll be able to convince her otherwise."

"No Fitz. You can. Just keep telling her, it will sink in, even if it's unconsciously. She'll know."

"Thanks man."

"Look, I know this is hard right now, but Oscar he's still young, he just doesn't understand everything at the moment."

Just as he was about to reply Fitz felt Olivia wrap her arms around him from behind, nestling her face into his back.

"I know, listen, I've got to go. Keep me updated though."

Olivia waited quietly, just holding onto Fitz as he said his goodbyes, to who she assumed was Stephen.

"Good morning..." Fitz said gently pulling Olivia from behind, so she was now facing him.

He wrapped his arms around her securely, as she snuggled into his chest briefly.

"Morning..."

Olivia placed a gentle kiss against his lips, before pulling away and looking at him directly.

"I think we need to talk to Oscar. He needs some sort of reassurance from us."

"I know but first, we both need to be in the right headspace." Fitz said looking at her intently, waiting, to see if she would say anything. "Liv, tell me you don't blame yourself for this."

Nothing still.

He thought they had been through this and had it sorted, back when everything happened. They worked through it together, or so he thought.

"Liv?"

He tried to look down at her but she was hiding her face against his chest.

"We talked about this. Remember, we all did, together."

He coaxed her away from himself, gently lifting her chin, so he could look at her. Properly look at her.

"I know..." She mumbled quietly, crying silently. "This just brought it all back to the surface, that's all."

"And last night?"

"I'm sorry..." She said looking down.

"Liv... I don't want you to be sorry. I just want to understand what you're thinking and feeling. Okay?"

Before either of them could say anything else a small voice interrupted them.

"Mummy... Daddy?"

"Oscar..."