Drawing a Family

A/N: Ah, I guess I'm in the mood for some Calhoun/Vanellope family bonding. I love the idea of Felix and Calhoun adopting Vanellope, and Ralph being the big brother. Anyway, here's my new one-shot, Drawing a Family! Thanks for reading and here's some cookies for you!

Someone was knocking the door.

She knew it wouldn't be Felix, he had a key. (And he was inside anyway, sleeping.) Ralph wouldn't knock that softly. It left only…

"Cadet? What are you doing in Fix-It Felix Jr.?" Calhoun said, opening the door of her and Felix's house in Niceland to reveal Vanellope, grinning.

"Hi Sarge! Can't a president drop by during closing hours?" Vanellope smiled brightly.

"Well, make it quick. Or are you looking for Fix-It?" Calhoun said, impatience creeping up her voice.

"Aw Sarge! You're my adoptive mom after all! Can't you be a teeny weeny beany bit nicer?" Vanellope whined.

Calhoun groaned. "Okay, okay, you brats are soooooo hard to deal with." She sighed as Vanellope skipped into the living room. "So? President business? Girl issues? Don't tell me you have a crush. I can't help you with that."

"Sarge, I wanna draw a family portrait." Vanellope said, all joke-and-fun airs gone.

"Run that by me again?"

"A family portrait. See, it's like a picture-"

"Well, grab some art stuff in your castle. I'm sure there are a cartload of salmon paint." she joked dryly.

"See, there's the problem- you're supposed to show it to your family. And Sarge… I can't draw."

"Well, neither can I," Calhoun shrugged. "I'll wake Fix-It and you can do it together-"

"But I want to surprise him with this, and, we'll, you're my mom," Vanellope said quietly.

Calhoun gave in. "Fine, fine, now, I'll get you some crayons, okay?" She had got some art stuff in store in case Vanellope stayed at hers, which sometimes happened when the president wanted to hang out with Ralph and Felix and her but got tired and fell asleep. Rummaging through the drawers, at last, she found a box of crayons and handed it over to the young girl.

"First, why don't we draw you? This green matches your hoodie," Calhoun pulled out a minty green and passed it to the girl who was flipping through a pad of paper. "And this is… black. And beige. Do you know how to draw people, kid?"

Vanellope looked sheepish. "No."

Calhoun sighed for the millionth time. "Draw a circle. Not too big. That's your head," she pointed at the blob of beige. "And add some hair and eyes and a smile or whatever."

After Vanellope had scribbled some hair onto 'her' head, Calhoun jabbed the space next to stick-figure Vanellope. "And… why don't we put Ralph on your left?"

Vanellope nodded and reached for the orange crayon. Deliberately giving the tall guy a larger figure, she smiled at her effort when she finished drawing Ralph. "Done! Can we do Felix now?"

"Well, yeah." Calhoun grabbed the blue crayon and pressed it into the young girl's hand.

Vanellope smiled blissfully as she did the handyman before Calhoun noticed something wasn't right: "Hey, cadet. Felix isn't that tall," she pointed out. "Now he looks as tall as Ralph."

"This way he won't be self-conscious of his height, doi-" Vanellope chirped.

Calhoun raised an eyebrow. "When did you start being this considerate?"

"- and he won't have to hop up every time you two smooch. I mean, you two smooch a lot! And it has to be pretty tiring!"

Calhoun stopped smiling and her lips crumbled back to her comfortable frown.

"Sooooo! I'm gonna put you here, Sarge. Ugh. Why's your armor so hard to draw?" Vanellope moaned.

"Why don't you ask my designers?" Calhoun replied with a flat voice.

"I'll just ignore those red glowing thingies on your armor. And why's your hair covering half your face?"

"They are called 'bangs', cadet," Calhoun stewed in impatience. "Anyway. You done?"

"Nooo! I have to draw the Nicelanders and everyone in Sugar Rush!" Vanellope said.

Calhoun's annoyance only grew. "Kid, I did mention that this kind of job is for Fix-It, right?"

"Yeah, Sarge…"

"Why don't you get him instead? He'd never get annoyed," Calhoun shouted. "Even if you're okay with this, I'm not! I don't do kids!"

Vanellope blinked at her. "But I thought you liked me. Don't you?"

"Yes! But no!" Calhoun snapped.

"I know you don't like me, um… mom," Vanellope shifted nervously. "But you're the only mother figure I got. See, all Sugar Rush racers are parentless but at least they had King Candy. And he… well, the Turbo in him loathed me, didn't he? I grew up on my own. And until the cy-bug fiasco… I thought I finally had a mom. And Felix and Ralph made it clear they took me in as family and I was hoping, you know, you'd like me as a daughter. I… I thought…"

Tears were streaming down the girl's cheeks. Calhoun, unsure what to do, started patting Vanellope's shoulder sympathetically.

Calhoun inhaled a deep breath. "Kid… well, I grew up parentless. I think. Even if it's in my backstory. But I found companionship in my men. I'm honored, really, to know I'm like the mother you never had, and I'm pretty sorry I let you down. I am not a maternal person, I know, and you really deserve a mom. Perhaps I'm not the best person to talk to, let alone be all mom-like, but… let's say… I like you. A lot. As family. And if it is my duty to be your mom… I'll try."

Vanellope's lips twitched into a small smile. "Why don't we make you the dad and Felix the mom?"

"Great one, kid." Calhoun tried to control her grin, but failed miserably. "Are you doing that strawberry girl… Taffyta? I'm sure you'll need pink."

The next day, Felix found a picture lying under his hammer. Careful not to wake his wife, he scooted to the bedside table and slid the sheet of paper into his hands:

To Hammer Time,

Love from Vanellope (and Sergeant Hard-to-Draw-Armor)

He flipped the paper over and found his family and the Sugar Rush racers grinning back at him. He glanced at a still-sleeping Calhoun. Later, he mused, he had to know what happened during his sleep.