Title: Kakashi's an Enabler, Alternatively Titled; Why Does Naruto Keep Giving Him All These Damn Plants

Rated: T for Profanity

Pairings: N/A, Gen.

Fandom: Naruto

Wordcount: 5,469

Summary: When Naruto and his penchant for plants coincide with his sneaking skills, Kakashi ends up saddled with more greenery than he can really handle.

Part of the "Konoha Nin and Their Lesser Known Hobbies" series

This is, in fact, a rewrite. I wrote the original... a little over a year ago now?

EDIT: fixed some formatting issues. I forgot that doesn't translate html commands, leaving that mess. Made some minor tweaks, as well.

I hate it. I feel like it's not really the best I can do and is overall mediocre. I'd left it alone, assuming I'd never want to post it on Ao3, but this standalone is now a part of a series that is best suited for Ao3, so I'm rewriting it now, as the second part is nearing completion.

If you want to read the original version (and I don't know why you would, it's bad.), it will be up on my Tumblr.

Without further ado, enjoy!

Kakashi Hatake was a simple man, at heart. He lived simply, in a small, one-room apartment in the residential district of Konoha. Kakashi, a simple man with no existing family, had no need for such frivolities.

As such, his morning routine was just a simple.

It was: get up, feed his ninken, dress, check his stock of basic supplies, and select a book from his icha icha collection. He'd then head over to the memorial stone, where he would then spend an indeterminate time crouched in front of. The man would muse over memories of days long past, of people now dead and buried. He was silent, except for when secrets would unwittingly fall from his lips, and he would be oblivious to the outward whispers of his innermost thoughts.

The routine had long since been ingrained in him, habit seemingly imprinted in every cell and organ in his body.

Even with the addition of a genin team, his routine had not changed. Of course, it was far too early for Kakashi to know for sure that he'd be able to continue on as he'd been, but like hell Kakashi would disrupt it for anyone other than the Hokage, especially not for a trio of pre-pubescent wannabes.

Besides, he was only a couple hours late. He'd made people wait longer, so, really, this was nothing.

'Ah… it really is nice out today. Maybe I should take a stroll?' the man mused, porn book in one hand and the other tucked into his pocket. 'I should try to enjoy it. Those kids can surely wait a little bit longer.'

Yet, despite the clear weather, Kakashi couldn't help the slight prickle of unease.

Kakashi's stroll had taken up an extra hour and a half. The man had flipped through his book peacefully, seeing fit to follow the current of people on the busy streets of the village. So when he'd arrived at Team Seven's designated meeting place, deftly scaling a tree so he could observe the team's overall mood, expecting three prickling genin, amusingly riled up with his untimely manners. He'd been expecting a scolding Sakura, having taken up yelling at Naruto as a distraction, while the other wanted and raves about some subject or the other, likely about Sasuke. Sasuke would appear as still as stone, except for his crossed arms and the slight furrow to his brow.

This was not, in fact, what Kakashi saw.

Sasuke, for one, looked disturbed. He was looking at Naruto with the same wariness he regarded the Hokage with, the very same wariness he regarded the clan heads and other jounin with. He'd angled his body as far away from Naruto as possible, while attempting to make it seem as if he was firmly holding his ground, unbothered, unperturbed. Sakura, on the other hand, looked nearly terrified, having huddled close to Sasuke, as if asking him to shield her.

Kakashi balked a bit when he realized Sasuke hadn't even seemed to notice his proximity to Sakura, utterly unaware of everything but the blonde kid in front of him.

And wasn't Naruto a sight? Naruto looked the same, at least, but his appearance and the words coming out of his mouth didn't correlate in the slightest, as Naruto, of all people, was fervently pestering his other two team members about themselves; whining and pleading and asking blatantly probing questions without a shred of guilt or acknowledgement of just how Not Okay that was.

Naruto was gesticulating wildly, his arms moving and waving and twisting with every other word he spoke, as if, if he just made enough hand motions, it'd convince the other two to spill their guts.

Kakashi is only mildly surprised the dread that'd been nagging at him on his stroll intensifies, in that moment.

The jounin stares at Naruto, blinking slowly.

...Naruto sure lacked subtlety, huh?

However, when Naruto lurched forward to grab Sasuke's shoulder, (and either choke him out or shake them harshly) Sasuke's hands twitched, a sign that if Kakashi didn't intervene in under two seconds one of his genin would be fried, while the other would end up suspended from the ranks for assaulting a teammate.

So, with haste, Kakashi descended from the tree he was lurking in, hitting the ground firmly to let the team know he had arrived.

… Kakashi stuck his hand between Naruto and Sasuke, for good measure. Can't ignore your Sensei's hand in your face, right?

"Yo."

At first, it worked. Naruto backed off, whirling on Kakashi and pointing an accusing finger in Kakashi's face, "Sensei! You're late!"

Ah, what had happened today, causing him to be late? "Sorry, Naruto. You see, there was this old lady. She'd dropped her groceries and I just had to help her pick them up!"

By now the nearly homicidal glint in Sasuke's eye had faded, dulling to something of a faint rage, clearly aware of his surroundings enough to surreptitiously take several large steps away from Sakura. She looked faintly hurt by the silent rejection, but it slowly morphed into one determination.

None of them looked convinced by his story. Little shits.

Naruto opened his mouth as if to loudly accuse Kakashi of lying, only to stop and shake his head. When Naruto started to speak again, something completely different came out.

It was an outpour of searing, intensely personal questions. It seemed that Naruto was dead set on pestering him for information.

Shouldn't it have been apparent to Naruto he wasn't too keen on revealing much about himself? Kakashi thought they'd covered this on day one.

"Kakashi-sensei! What's your favorite food? I like ramen! It's the best! D'ya have any pets? What're their names? Ooh, what's your favorite color? It should be orange, orange is an awesome color! Is your hair dyed or were you born with it? Ya never told us anythin' about yourself besides your name - so! Kaka-Sensei!"

During Naruto's bombardment of questions, the blonde genin had slowly inched closer, and with his ending plea, he'd been nearly touching Kakashi. The man sighed slightly, some part of him twitching with the urge to do a quick kawarimi and put Sakura in his place, but instead, the jounin only stepped back slightly, raising his hands in a placating manner and gently pushing them outwards, as if to encourage Naruto to shuffle back as well. (The nearly pleading look in Sasuke's eyes, along with the mournful look on Sakura's face was certainly persuasive. Is this what it's like to be a teacher?)

The white-haired jounin then brought a hand up to ruffle his hair slightly, "Ah - well… we have training, right now… so… uh, my little genin! Gather in the center of the training grounds and await further orders! We have much to do today!"

'Nice one, Kakashi, real smooth.'

Sasuke and Sakura, for once, needed no further prompting, taking the opportunity as a means to put some distance between themselves and Naruto.

Naruto, on the other hand, frowned. Rebuking his statement with a huffy, "But - Sensei! We're a team now! We have to know these kinds of things about each other! We just have to!"

Kakashi just hummed and turned away, "Do we?"

"Gah - Yea, we do! Kakashi-sensei, C'mon! Please? Please please please!" Naruto wheedled, nearly fuming.

Kakashi rubbed his chin, appearing to think about it for a second, before shrugging and moving in the direction of Sasuke and Sakura. "Hmm, well. We have a lesson to get to. You have a lot to work on, Naruto. We'll be doing several exercises today, including one for chakra control…"

Mentally, Kakashi applauded himself.

(If only he'd turned around. If he had, he would've seen Naruto's eyes glint for a single moment, before stomping after Kakashi with a visible pout.)

There was something about Naruto that should never be forgotten, never be shoved aside or dismissed. Naruto, for all his failing grades and loud, attention drawing demeanor, was frighteningly stubborn. The boy was impassioned, and when his mind latched onto something, it was unlikely Naruto would ever let go, not until he'd gotten what he wanted.

Even if it seemed impossible, even if it seemed worthless or far off, Naruto pursued it with passion, a desperate-but-not kind of fire in his eyes.

Kakashi, of all people, shouldn't have forgotten.

The man could honestly say Naruto's attempts at gathering information had fully slipped his mind, over-taken by things like their first C-Rank, and the icy, panicked feeling he'd gotten seeing Naruto injured, the chunin exams, along with Sasuke slowly succumbing to the cursed seal. His genin—they were so small. How hadn't he noticed? They weren't ready for this, they could die and it'd be all his fault—would inevitably be threatened by someone so much stronger than them.

So could he really be faulted for not expecting this?

Kakashi had arrived at the mission late, having informed his team of where to meet and what their mission was to be the day prior. He really should be training his genin harder than usual, as the chunin exams were coming up…

Hmm… maybe later.

The man was pleased to note that the trio had already gotten to work before he'd arrived, starting to weed the client's garden without his prompting. Kakashi was, however, displeased to find that'd stopped working, Sasuke and Sakura looking disturbed but interested as Naruto rambled at them, waving around a fistful of dug up weeds.

The jounin's displeasure quickly turned to horror. 'Oh, god. He wasn't, was he?'

'...He is, isn't he.'

How did Naruto even get his old mission reports? Most of them were B-rank or higher! Kakashi really isn't sure how Naruto even got this information, but he's going to murder the desk-nin who allowed this trainwreck to transpire.

Some things... are better off buried.

He felt a great amount of satisfaction at the howl of pain from Naruto, who had been whacked across the head by a broom-wielding Sakura. He was disappointed when Naruto continued to run his mouth anyway, and was glad Sakura looked totally exhausted in Kakashi's place.

This was supposed to have been a normal D-rank. Yet, once again, Naruto had managed to flip the notion on its head, bringing nothing but chaos and misery to all parties involved—including Naruto himself.

Kakashi nearly shook with the thought of what Naruto may do with all this information on him. The accurate, but sometimes vague, detailings of Kakashi's life. The jounin knew Naruto had a mischievous streak a mile wide, and there was no telling what the blonde genin would do at his—and Sasuke's—expense.

However, when Naruto took a deep breath and moved from his mission history to his personal history, delving into the tragedy of Team Minato and Kannabi Bridge, Kakashi, once again, had to step in. (and quickly, at that. He doesn't like even thinking about Kannabi bridge. Those memories contain too much pain and loss for him to really handle.) Something in Kakashi burst into action, going from silently observing the trio from behind his book, to pacing towards Naruto and grabbing the boy by the collar of his jumpsuit, effectively cutting off the next part to his very intrusive storytelling.

"And then Sensei's teammate—Obito Uchiha—"

Naruto startled, looking slightly sheepish—but, Kakashi noted, the blonde genin appeared mostly annoyed—while Sakura and Sasuke sent each other a look, and subtly attempted to vacate the premises. Sakura didn't dare approach Sasuke, however, he now had too much mortifying knowledge about Sakura under his belt, and as such she wasn't too keen on pushing the limits in favor of her crush, though inner Sakura was nearly steaming with displeasure. Naruto just scowled up at Kakashi, trying to shake off Kakashi's iron grip. "What, Sensei? I'm tryin' to tell Sakura-chan and Sasuke-teme somethin' about you, 'cause you weren't willin' to spill and its need-to-know info!"

Kakashi twitched, narrowing his eyes at the boy, "Naruto…where did you get this information?"

Naruto averted his eyes, breaking out into a cold sweat, "Uh.."

Kakashi pushed forward, undeterred by the lack of a prompt response, "Was it the Hokage who told you?" (If so, Kakashi and Tsunade would have words, lack of authority or no.)

Naruto's expression twisted, resembling something like offense, "'Course not! The old hag couldn't even do that as Hokage, it's illegal!"

Kakashi just tapped his foot, "Then how?"

Naruto cringed, grimacing, hesitating a moment before reluctantly admitting, "I, uh, snuck a... tiny look at your files? Just a peek, I swear!"

Kakashi stuttered, blindsided by the admission. Off to the side, Sasuke and Sakura, who'd been trying to sneakily eavesdrop on their conversation, gaped at their third team member.

"Y-you what?"

(There was no way. Naruto, who is so loud, so bright orange and predictable, who broadcasts his every thought and movement, his entire person screaming for attention, for the stray eye to look his way. For someone like Naruto, such a feat was virtually impossible.)

Naruto sighed, looking mulishly at his teacher as if he were the one being difficult. "We're a team! We need to know this kind of stuff! We're like strangers! All I did was make it so that all of us know about each other, in fact, you should be thanking me!" Naruto broke off with a mumble that sounded like, "Besides, it's not like it's hard to get that sort of stuff anyway."

The (mostly) sane members of Team Seven just stared, slightly dazed, as they tried to picture a ninja in neon orange breaking into the archive under the Hokage Tower, before calling out in varying degrees of disbelief, "No, you?!"

"Stop lying, idiot."

"Now, Naruto, that's not something to joke about."

Naruto bristled, huffing and crossing his arms, "Well, you guys weren't tellin' me anything and I needed to find out somehow! So I broke into the archive and read your files, it was simple! It's not like it's a big deal or anything, everyone can do it!" Naruto took the time to glare at each one of them, clearly affronted that they were dubious of his claim.

Kakashi snapped out of his stupor just as Naruto got tired of the awkward silence and started to struggle out of his hold, attempting to pry Kakashi's fingers off of Naruto's jumpsuit.

Kakashi's hands didn't budge. Instead, Kakashi picked Naruto up and threw him over his shoulder; he ignored the handful of weeds that were chucked at his jounin vest and marched Naruto all the way to the Hokage Tower.

Kakashi would need to have a discussion with Tsunade about the tower's security if Naruto could get into it.

As his other two (thankfully obedient) genin trailed behind him, Naruto's indignant complaints towards Kakashi turned increasingly nervous, "Oi, Sensei! Sensei put me down!"

"...You're not gonna snitch are you?" (Oh, yes, he certainly was going to 'snitch'. The little devil deserved it, anyway.)

"...Sensei?"

"You can't stop him, you know." Tsunade grunted, resigned.

Kakashi jolted a bit, slightly shocked at Tsunade's gruff, blunt words, "Tsunade-hime, you're the Hokage. There must be something that can be done to get him to stop."

They were in the Hokage's office, Kakashi having dumped a pleading Naruto onto the floor in front of the Hokage's desk, entering the room along with a faintly amused Sakura and Sasuke.

Naruto was then pulled up into a chair in front of Tsunade's desk, looking sulky. The defiant expression on Naruto's face turned immensely smug upon hearing the Hokage's mournful response, slyly sending Kakashi a smirk.

"Supposedly. The brat-" Naruto bristled, retaliating against Tsunade's insult swiftly. He was sent crashing through the wall without the Hokage sending even a second glance his way. Kakashi eye-smiled at the Naruto-shaped hole in the wall, smirking beneath his mask. 'Serves the brat right.' "-gets into everything, chunin records, jounin medical files, ANBU mission histories, you name it. He can get into every important location in Konoha. If we close off one hole in our security, he'll find another way in. He's our security team's worst nightmare, and our intelligence division's wet dream.

"Try all you want to get him to stop, Hatake. It will do nothing. I know, I've tried. I've even threatened to take him off active duty for a month! Instead, he turned around and blackmailed me! I swear he knows everyone's secrets, and there is no escape." Tsunade finished, cutting herself off before she could derail the conversation any further, sending a glare at the hole in the wall that Naruto was peeling himself out of, brushing rubble off his orange clothing.

Kakashi, himself, was having trouble digesting this information. Naruto, an ill-prepared genin who couldn't even do a bunshin, being able to successfully infiltrate some of the most heavily guarded buildings in Konoha, escape, and blackmail the fucking Hokage into letting him get away with it? It just wouldn't compute.

'God help Konoha.' Kakashi thought, furtively sending a prayer to Minato-sensei, wishing he'd come back from the afterlife and retrieve his son, since the genin is clearly out of control.

Naruto broke into arrogant, boisterous laughter. "Of course! I'm the Prankster King! To be that awesome ya have to know your prankin' area inside out!" Naruto proudly announced, nearly posturing.

"I can't believe Sensei put up with this…" Tsunade muttered, rifling through her desk drawers for a bottle of alcohol.

Naruto gestured flippantly to the painting of the Third on the wall, "Oh, Jiji and I made it a game! It was sort of like hide and seek, but more fun! I would hide somewhere and do a prank if he didn't find me in time; if he caught me I had to help him with paperwork… he cheated using that crystal ball of his though..."

Tsunade just put her head in her hands.

When Kakashi awoke on September fifteenth, he went about his day as he usually did. He got up, showered, put on his mask(s) and jounin vest, fed his ninken, and finally tied his hitai-ate over his left eye before heading for the Memorial Stone.

It was only when he got there that he remembered the significance of the date. It'd been niggling at him all morning.

Today was his birthday.

'Oh, joy.

...If Gai finds out, he'll never leave me alone.'

With the thought came a wave of paranoia, his senses attempting to trick him into thinking the spandex wearing man would suddenly appear out of nowhere, and he cut his time at the Memorial Stone short; an almost desperate decision made to change up his routine all in an attempt to stave off the inevitable. The jounin dropped by the dango place Anko likes, discretely casting a henge onto himself, cursing his own cowardice but thinking in an almost pleading tone, 'Sorry Sensei... Obito. It's Gai. You understand, right?'

When Kakashi next checked the clock, it was nearly 1:30 PM, and he approximately was six hours late to his team meeting. A bit put-off by the time, and feeling slightly guilty that he'd made his genin wait that long, Kakashi's fourth stick of dango was discarded before it could be finished.

'...this is probably a new record.' Kakashi lamented.

The man wouldn't at all be surprised if his genin were out for blood right now, attempting to hunt their poor teacher down and slaughter him for his untimely manner. Nothing more ruthless than irritated genin, he'd found. Placing the money for the dango on the counter, Kakashi hightailed it for the days meeting place.

When Kakashi materialized in front of an extremely annoyed Team Seven, the jounin made sure to give his students an extra cheerful greeting, to make it seem as if the time he'd kept them waiting was entirely intentional.

His genin, Kakashi noticed with a grimace, seemed to be plotting his murder. Ah, he'd probably left at a good time, then. Kakashi nervously spouted off his usual excuses, wracking his brain for one that was just convoluted enough to cover the time.

Sakura cracked her knuckles, Sasuke's nostrils flared, his face heaving slightly in fury.

Naruto's eyes turned almost icy, a calculating glint reflected in his them.

...Kakashi was screwed. Anyone and everyone who'd been personally victimized by Naruto's pranking habits also knew that Naruto only made that face when he was planning a revenge prank in the most humiliating way possible. He weathered the usual reprimands, Sasuke having joined in with particularly prickly comments, all directed towards his Precious Sensei. Ouch.

He eye smiled at his genin, appearing unruffled by the harsh treatment, and just as Kakashi was about to unveil a comeback witty enough to derail further scrutiny of his whereabouts; he was instead was met with a plant shoved in his face, the name "Mr. Ukki" scrawled haphazardly across the rim of its pot. Naruto followed this up with his own bellow, "Happy birthday Sensei!".

Kakashi blinked.

The man then, with a sigh, easily accepted the potted plant that was forced into his hands. He'd gotten used to Naruto's sneakiness and surprising aptitude for infiltration and stealth months ago, it didn't surprise him at all that Naruto knew his birthdate. The blonde genin hadn't really stopped at their files, which all seemed to fall into his hands with ease, as if he'd always had them, somehow. He went above and beyond and scrounged around for more information on them, and even started compiling information on his peers! Kakashi had no doubt in his mind that Naruto had probably read a lot of the higher ninja's psych-evals, too.

As Kakashi adjusted the plant in his grip, carefully making sure not to squish or tear any of the leaves, and Naruto stepped back and pursed his lips, fiddling with his hands before looking up; his posture shifting into something oddly small, almost shy. There was an anxious furrow in his eyebrows, his body language revealing a restlessness and trepidation as Naruto nervously prompted, "Do... do ya like it? It's called the "cast-Iron" plant because it's a low maintenance plant, and since we're ninja and all... you'll probably forget to water it or give it good sunlight sometimes because we'll be busy with ninja stuff. You need to keep the soil a bit wet, but it can stand a bit of neglect. Um, I thought maybe you'd like it?"

Kakashi was tempted to pull out his porn book and ignore this display of vulnerability. He really was. Instead, he reached out and ruffled Naruto's messy hair, murmuring his thanks and eye smiling down at him. The tips of Naruto's ears turned red, and he sputtered and rubbed his neck, even as a bright grin burst onto his face. Sakura and Sasuke both held out their gifts for him, Sasuke looking reluctantly pleased with the surprised look in his eye. 'Hmm… maybe I can go a little easier on them today.'

He quickly accepted the gifts, tucking the wrapped packages into his vest for later.

Now, wasn't it time to get started on training?

When they stopped for a late lunch-the trio just took him to Ichiraku's, which figures—The old ramen chef supplied them all with little party hats that wouldn't fit on his head due to his messy, spiky hair.

It was cute, but Kakashi found it a bit humiliating.

Kakashi then deigned to open the gifts he received from his other two genin. Mr. Ukki the Plant, of course, sat on the counter, green leaves shining proudly. Kakashi handed the wrapped paper off to Teuchi-san, before thanking Sasuke and Sakura for their thoughtful gifts.

(They still whined and complained when he didn't give them the rest of the day off, despite their wheedling. Little shits.)

There was a warm feeling in his chest as he walked home. A leafy plant, a romance novel, ('Without porn!' Sakura had hastily tacked on, before Kakashi could question how she'd managed to get her hands on it. He was a little disappointed, but was appreciative nonetheless.) and a new package of masks cradled in his arms, arranged carefully so none of the items would be bent or torn- marred before he could even get them back to his apartment.

Kakashi freezes as he hears someone shout from the distance, "My Eternal Rival!"

He sighs dejectedly.

...It had been such a good day, too.

Kakashi, when he'd entered his apartment that day, set the newly proclaimed Mr. Ukki on the window sill of his small apartment, where it would bask in the filtered sun permanently. The jounin then tried to water it on time, and made his best attempt at caring for it properly.

Naruto was gone, off galavanting with the toad sage. Kakashi was proud of him-that was for sure-but lingering tendrils of dark ink reached up from the recesses of his mind stained his positive thoughts, whispering regrets—'I could have done more'—'There wasn't enough time.'—in his ears at all hours.

Sakura is… not gone. She has been taken as Tsunade's apprentice, and Kakashi is relieved to see her thrive.

…though, Kakashi realizes with startling clarity, he hasn't seen her in a while

(Kakashi carefully doesn't think about Sasuke; he makes sure the unopened package of masks sits at the bottom of his dresser, hidden away where he doesn't have to see it.)

That first year of Naruto's trip, Kakashi receives two plants and a letter from Naruto. He'd woken up on his birthday, did everything that he'd always done, and opened the door to his apartment, only to find a small package and two pots, each coming with a plant. The jounin had felt his lips curl upwards from under his mask, his blank-faced demeanor lightening. He'd immediately brought the gifts inside, carefully opening the letter first.

Kakashi had run his eyes over the messy lettering, taking in the simple wording, enthusiastic run-ons, and endless rambling fondly. Though, when he finds that the reason Naruto sent two plants was because of Sasuke's abandonment, a flash of pain struck through his chest, making his brows twitch.

Kakashi had then cleared his throat and deigned to ignore it.

He'd then picked up the package the letter was attached to, tearing off the paper to reveal two books. One is a plant care manual. Containing basic information on how to care for most indoor plants, which Kakashi knows he will find useful, brown thumb as he is. The other… an icha icha novel. A brand new Icha Icha novel, yet to be released to the public, if he's correct (which, of course, he is). Kakashi fumbles with the cover, shrieking a little in his excitement, wide-eyed. On the inside of the book, Kakashi finds that Jiraiya signed it!

'The brat's really outdone himself this year.' Kakashi mused, nearly euphoric.

One plant- a parlor palm, the label reads-is set onto on his desk, while the other is hoisted up onto Kakashi's bookshelf. The label for the waxy-leaved plant reads, "arrowhead vine".

He spots his ninken looking at him and his book with contempt, but Kakashi falls back into the story, and is then too immersed in his new copy of Icha Icha to really pay them any mind.

(He's a bit disappointed when the day ticks idly away, the countdown of his birthday draining away steadily, like sand in a glass clock. Sakura does not show up in the time spanning from dawn to dusk, nothing else arrives at his doorstep, but that's okay. He has his ninken. Kakashi has his plants—Kakashi thinks he understands why Naruto likes them so much—and his Icha Icha books. He's content, truly. He is not lonely, he tells himself.

He's not.)

The next couple years are much the same, he receives a few new books on plant care, plant supplies he tucks away into a drawer, several new plants—even one made to hang from the ceiling!—and the manuscript for the latest Icha Icha novel. The jounin has found himself starting to look forward to his birthdays, just a little. Even if Sakura's hasn't been to visit him a little over six months, and Sasuke's defection makes his heart crack a little more as the days pass, make him a little more bitter. Kakashi is not lonely. He's got his plants (He understands, now. He does.), he's got Naruto's letters, Gai's challenges, and his ninken.

All in all, things are looking up.

Right?

"Hatake, I think you have a fucking problem." groans Raidou, who's started to gripe at him, interrupting the languid rambling of his most recent his plant-related excursions. Naruto had sent him some stalks of bamboo a couple weeks ago, along with some sunflower seeds, and he's been invested in making sure those sunflower seeds sprout, brown thumb be damned.

Kakashi just looks at the other jounin blandly, "Hmm… what makes you think that?"

This time it's Asuma that chimes in, "It's all you ever talk about anymore, Kakashi. I don't know why one of your brats thought getting you a plant was a good idea, honestly."

Kakashi then gains an air of mock-offense, gazing at them all with fake hurt, retorting with a long whine about "abuse" and of "sacrilege".

When Naruto finally returns from his training trip, he greets the village with a dazzling smile and a loud declaration of his arrival. When he greets Kakashi, he hands him a handful of canterbury bells, smiles at him brightly, and waves goodbye to him; backtracking down the street, all the while chattering something about meeting "Iruka-sensei" for ramen. The conversation is brief, but Kakashi looks down at the plant in his hands, and smiles. He looks back up, sends a short wave back to Naruto, and re-enters his apartment. Kakashi then pulls a mug from the cabinet in his cramped kitchenette, fills it with water, and puts the flower bundle in it.

The gray-haired jounin picks one out of the bouquet, and tucks it into his pocket before picking out an icha icha book.

Kakashi turns the doorknob to his apartment, and heads down to the jounin station, to relax and brag about his new gift, of course. He is instantly gratified when he enters the lounge and quickly has the entire group exasperated at the little bell-shaped flower sticking out of his vest pouch.

(He'll find out later, drunk with Gai and a couple of the other jounin, that canterbury bells mean "gratitude". Gai will beam at him, and Kakashi will drunkenly mumble about his new favorite student before passing out.)

Time passes.

Pein's attack strikes Konoha, he dies and his apartment is destroyed. The fourth shinobi war is kicked off and it's a constant battle for life and death. Naruto still sends him plants and flowers for his birthdays and other special occasions.

He lives in a new apartment, now. It's bigger, more spacious, than the last, as he'd run out of space to keep all his plants and ended up worried about killing his student's gifts. (He'd been so sad after he accidentally killed Mr. Ukki three years ago. Naruto told him that it was alright, of course, but Kakashi has since been determined to not have it happen again.)

Kakashi is not a man of many wants, he has no need for such luxuries, and yet, for the little green gifts Naruto gives him, he's moved into a place that could be described as, from someone like him, "superfluous".

From time to time, the jounin will glance at Team Seven's team photo, and the small romance novel on the shelf, and with a twinge of nostalgia for all things lost, grin.

All's right with the world, to Kakashi. He's still got his ninken, Gai and his challenges, the other jounin, his students, Icha Icha, and his plants.

And that's good enough for him.

Hope you enjoyed it! Tell me what you think if you feel so inclined.