A/N : New fic for #OQUpdateMonth!

This had been requested more than 2 years ago by a friend for her birthday, and it was so difficult and painful to write that it took me two years. But I made it!

Her prompt was "Regina's POV of Don't let the Dreamcatchers bite". So obviously, you understand that you have to read the previous part in order to fully understand this one. It will help you prepare for it.

Here's some warnings about what you'll find in this story : Depression; Suicidal behavior; Mentions of physical abuse; Psychological abuse

A huge thank you Milly and Jess for your help!

And finally, about a month later, M, I'm a bit late, but I still wish you a belated happy birthday ;-) You finally got your prompt written!

I hope you guys will love this. I put my heart in it, made plenty of researches, had to rewatch a lot of painful scenes from the show, cried several times, felt my gut twist and my throat squeeze. I really wish the result will be to your liking. I can't wait, but I'm also afraid, to hear your thoughts!

"Damn it!"

Regina stares at her wrist with a scowl. Exactly what I need, she thinks with irony.

Well, at least that explains why I feel like shit.

She sighs, considers her options.

Should she talk about it with the others? No way. They will freak out, will throw her in the dungeons to protect themselves from the disease, and even if she ends up surviving it, they might forget about her very existence.

So no, there's no way she's saying a word about this.

She could leave. After all, that mark could have been there for a while, and there's no way of telling what stage of the disease she's at. She might become contagious soon, if she hasn't already, which means she'll fall asleep. Not counting that if she disappears without warning anyone, they -well, at least Snow- might look for her, and if she's passed out somewhere, they will find her and by the time they figure out what she's suffering from, the whole castle will have caught it.

If she leaves, she'll be vulnerable, out in the open, exposed entirely to a forest full of wild animals looking for their next prey, might end up in their stomachs.

Regina winces. That's not really a nice picture to imagine, certainly not the end she'd want.

So no, not leaving.

Which leaves her to her last option: Lock herself in her bedroom. She'll be safe there, comfortable, and if she puts a note on the door asking people to leave her alone for a few days while she works on a way to defeat her sister and enchants the walls to keep them at bay, hopefully, that bunch of idiots will listen.

Yeah, that's the best solution.

Regina tugs at her sleeve to cover her wrist, lifts her chin up, puts herself back in her regal shoes, and walks firmly in direction of her chambers.

She's halfway there when she hears the sound of voices, recognizes a cheerful voice she knows too well, so she speeds up not to cross paths with any of them. She thinks of using her magic, just vanish herself from the hall in a second but she can already feel the tiredness invading her body, exhausting her and threatening to pull her under before she can reach her destination. If she tries to poof herself in her bedroom, she will probably drain her last remaining strength, or end up in a wall.

"Regina, you're here!"

Regina lets out an exasperated sound.

"I wanted to talk to you about our new plan."

Of course she does… Mary Margaret always has the worse timing…

"Not now, Mary Margaret. I have something to do first."

Regina doesn't stop walking, staring straight ahead and purposely avoiding making eye-contact with her and David as they follow her in the hallway.

"What could possibly be more important than our war against the Wicked Witch of the West?" David retorts.

Regina suppresses a snort. Never see past your little battles, right David?

"That's none of your business."

"Regina, please!"

Mary Margaret grips her arm as she pleads her, forcing Regina to turn around, and damn! The princess' face switches from her usual annoying self to obvious concern, her eyes opening wide as her brows shoot up.

"Regina, are you sure you're alright?"

But Regina dismisses her with a wave of her hand. It probably won't be enough, but she doesn't have the strength to do more than that right now.

"Yes, dear. I'm perfectly fine."

David steps behind his wife, staring at her with the same concern.

"Snow is right, Regina. You look like you're about to faint."

Why is she still talking to them? She can feel the disease spreading deep in her bones, knows she doesn't have much time left.

Yet, she manages to give David a murderous look.

"You definitely know how to speak to a woman, David. It's nice of you to care, but like I said, I am-"

A sudden bout of dizziness stops her, and Regina tries to fight it, tries to take a step forward, but her vision is blurred and her body doesn't obey her brain. The wall allows her to rest a little when she leans against it, but her energy doesn't come back, instead it keeps abandoning her. She closes her eyes, lets out a slow breath, fighting to recover enough strength to at least reach her bedroom.

"Regina!"

Snow's hand is on her forehead, so cold against her burning skin. The fever is here, it won't be long now.

"Damn it, Regina! You're burning up. You have to lie down, you're sick."

Good observation, Regina thinks sarcastically.

She pushes herself from the wall tiredly. "Alright, I'm going. But you don't have to follow me, I can-"

And then, there's nothing else but darkness.

xxx

When Regina opens her eyes, she's laying on the ground, face against the floor. She's enveloped in darkness, the light of the full moon coming from the window is the only thing that allows her to see.

For a moment, she stays still. All trace of tiredness is gone, she's not feverish anymore, the struggle to keep her eyes open has disappeared.

What is this place?

She pushes on her hands until she's on her knees, then gets up, glancing around her.

No! It can't be!

But the more Regina discovers, the more convinced she is.

This is her bedroom in her castle, but it doesn't show any traces of the changes she made in it since they moved back in. It seems familiar though. Too familiar. She's dressed in her old white dress, and her hair is once again long and loose along her back and shoulders, reminding her of old times.

Goosebumps run along her spine. It's almost as if…

The creek of the door pulls her out of her confused state, and Regina knows very well who is on the other side. She had a feeling he would be here. After all, the dreamcatcher's bite makes people's worst nightmares resurface, and in her whole life, no one has ever made her feel as powerless and insignificant as him.

"Regina!"

Here he comes…

Let the nightmare begins, she thinks bitterly, clenching her jaw.

She knows that she will have to fight him to survive this. What she doesn't know though, is what he's going to put her through.

She turns around slowly, glaring at him, chin high, unwilling to show her apprehension.

"Hiding in your bedroom again!" He thunders, stalking towards her threateningly. "Are you ever gonna make yourself useful?"

He's in her face now, spitting his words with disgust, looking her up and down.

"Are you deaf? Or did you lose your tongue?"

Regina wants to reply. She wants to scream at him all those unspoken feelings she kept buried in for decades.

But nothing comes out.

She's paralyzed, a prisoner of her own body, forced to suffer the sight and presence of the man she despises the most and, let's admit it now that it's obvious, feared. Without him, she would have been able to marry Daniel. If he hadn't proposed, her life would have been entirely different. Happy, full of love, tenderness, a genuine human's touch and warmth, care and affection. Instead of the loneliness and constant hatred she had been so full of.

"Why did I even marry you in the first place?"

Her cheek is burning before she realizes the slap happened, but when Regina brings a hand to her skin, she receives the next blow. She falls to her knees, stunned, dizzy, barely hearing the words of hate leaving her husband's lips, receiving the next punches with gritted teeth and eyes shut tight.

Stop!

Enough!

Leave me alone!

The words invade her mind but don't move past her lips. Instead, she remains like that, on the floor, enduring the punches, her breath knocked out of her lungs as she mentally repeats the same words over and over again.

But suddenly, they all vanish, the pain, the slaps, the screams in her head. They stop, and Regina waits a second before looking up, using this moment of peace to recover.

When she dares lift her head, she faces her husband, cheeks red from anger, eyes shooting daggers at her.

This isn't real.

He isn't Leopold.

For as much as she hated her husband, Regina knows very well that he would have never dared talk to her this way, let alone physically harm her as he just did. He was too kind for that, too uncaring to even give her so much as attention.

His fingers firmly close over her jaw, fingertips digging into her skin, leaving painful red traces when his grip move to her throat. Regina has no other choice but to get up to avoid being strangled, her hands wrapping around his wrist in a vain attempt to stop him as pain invades her throat.

"No," she breathes, forcing through her raspy voice and the lack of air and managing with difficulties. "Don't, please!"

"Don't you dare speak to me!" Leopold yells, shaking her. "You're useless. You have nothing of a royal, no wonder why I don't allow you to appear by my side. What kind of fool would I look like with such a shame next to me?"

Regina is struggling to breathe, to stay conscious, her arms falling by her side as her strength abandons her, body unresponsive under so much pressure. She fights, with the little clear-spirit she has left, she fights.

But why?

What does she have left to fight for?

Before Regina can think of an answer, she feels herself harshly thrown backwards, the back of her head hitting the ground hard. And as air comes back to her lungs, her mind drifts towards numbness, and she loses consciousness.

xxx

She wakes up on the floor, foggy, stunned, disoriented, confused. There's one thing she's certain of; her entire body hurts. She feels as if she had been run over by a car.

And then it hits her.

Leopold.

Her eyes widen then, frantically searching around her, triggering pains in her spine and skull.

She shuts her eyes tight, suppressing a groan when she pushes herself into a sitting position. She's alone in the room. Holding her ribs, wincing and almost choking as breathing triggers pain inside her whole chest.

It's still dark, and it takes her some time to get used to her surroundings, so she gets up cautiously, pushing her hands forward to prevent herself from falling as dizziness washes over her.

Okay, she thinks. You're alone. He's not here. Take a deep breath.

She takes a step towards the bed, hissing when she feels the consequences of his blows, the bruises on her abdomen and ribs coming back with every movement.

She sits on her bed with a painful sigh, closing her eyes for a second, relieved to have some rest. She brings a hand to her face, pressing her fingers to her burning cheek, startling at the pain spreading at the single pressure. Trying again, she winces. She can't see herself in a mirror, but from what she can feel, her cheek is swollen.

Regina's line of thought is interrupted when the door slams open, hitting the wall hard, startling her. Dread fills her when his frame appears in the entrance, his gaze directed straight towards her.

"Ah, I see that you're finally awake."

Regina stands awkwardly, fighting the fear twisting her stomach, telling herself not to let him win, not to give him this victory.

Stay strong! She tells herself.

"I know how you always complained about being ignored." He stalks towards her threateningly, not breaking eye-contact. "Well, I have great news! I have planned to spend the next days with you." He roots himself in front of her, spitting his words right to her face. "So I can finally and properly take care of you, the way I should have had all of these years."

Regina's eyes widen in horror. "Can you be more specific?" She dares reply, her tone less regal than intended, but she isn't fully in control of her own body.

"Oh, so now, you talk?" Leopold grins wickedly. His finger lifts to caress her cheek. Regina shudders, succeeds in receding from his touch, but the darkness of her husband's eyes increases at her bold move.

"Let's see what else you can say."

Before she has realized, his palm has slapped her cheek, his fist knocking the breath out of her when it hits her stomach, making her bend forward. He uses this moment to hit her back, forcing her on her knees with a painful scream.

"Now, I don't want to hear you complain about being left alone." He snaps, his words reaching her ears between two blows to her jaw and side. "I have a kingdom to rule!" He spits, foot crushing her hand and drawing another scream from her. "I don't have time for your jeremiad."

His fingers wrap around her throat, squeezing, Regina's eyes meeting his.

"Let me go!" She screams with the little strength she has left, cursing the unwanted weakness of her voice.

But Leopold stays deaf to her words.

"I gave you everything." He bites, throwing her on the ground, her head hitting it hard again. "A castle." He starts using his foot to hurt her, giving her strong kicks in the abdomen, the chest, even her face, with each word leaving his lips. "A Queen's life. A wonderful daughter to take care of. Servants bowing to your feet. Dresses and jewelry of the best quality. And yet you." Regina fights the bile rising in her throat when the pain becomes unbearable, his feet kicking her repeatedly in her ribs. "Never." Her jaw. "Stopped." Her arm. "Whining."

Regina's strength abandons her, and she sprawls on the floor, her battered and bruised body curled up, so painful she struggles to breathe, her vision blurred by her own blood and swelling face.

In the middle of her pain, there's a small but still perceptive soft rubbing up and down her shoulder, that draws her away from the pain for a second as an unknown voice is murmuring to her ear. "It's just a dream, Regina. You're safe. No one is going to hurt you."

This isn't real. She remembers then. Just hold on.

But the blows don't stop. Leopold's words of hate keep washing over her, wrapping around her mind like a blanket of fire and spines. Pain keeps spreading in her body until she feels completely numb.

The only thing she remembers when she closes her eyes, is the hateful face of her husband above her, his fist about to come crashing down on her.

xxx

Regina's eyes open wide to face blue eyes staring at her. She scoots back immediately, protectively wrapping her arms around her body. The man is startled, she can tell, but that's the least of her problems right now.

"What are you doing?" She asks harshly. She's defensive, feeling like herself again.

But there's a hitching in her throat, and the hardness of her tone triggers several coughing fits. When she opens her eyes, the man is handing her a glass of water, and her hand spontaneously closes over it, bringing it to her lips and sipping slowly, easing the itching.

She hands him the glass back, still suspicious. She recognizes him, that's the thief who accompanied her through the castle's dungeons. He holds his hands up on each side of his head while looking at her.

"I'm not here to hurt you, I promise. I'm just trying to help."

Then what the hell are you doing here? She wonders, looking at her surroundings before meeting his eyes again. This doesn't make any sense. What is she doing sitting on her bed in the middle of the day? More importantly, What is he doing here?

"Why am I here?" She questions. "Why are you in my bedroom?"

"You're ill, Regina." Well, that might explain the current pounding in her head. "I've been taking care of you since-" he suddenly stops, eyeing her with a compassion she doesn't understand. "Does the Dreamcatcher's bite sound familiar to you?"

The dreamcatcher's bite? She's heard about that before.

She nods slowly. "Yes."

His gaze lowers to her hand as he tilts his chin in its direction.

"Look at your wrist."

My wrist? What the-

Regina stills, searching through her memories, tentatively following the thief's indications, freezing when the dark spot on her skin triggers her memories, everything coming back suddenly.

The moment she realized she'd been bitten.

Her decision to lock herself in her room.

Her feverish state.

The meeting with Snow and David.

And then…

Leopold.

He's not here. Her body isn't hurting anymore, the pain is gone. Remembering what she learned about the Dreamcatcher's bite, she concludes flatly.

"I take it that I just woke up."

She catches his small smile from the corner of her eyes as she doesn't look away from her wrist, his voice tainted with relief, so she knows she's right.

"You did. What do you remember?"

Regina shrugs. "Not much. I saw this the day I started feeling feverish. I recognized it, but it's not as if there is a cure."

"Did you know you were contagious?"

"I did." She admits. "I was heading back to my chamber with the intention of locking myself in it, but the princess came to talk to me about something. I don't remember what it was."

And that's true. It's foggy, she remembers hearing their voices, but can't make out the words. She was overwhelmed with dizziness, struggling to stay upright, fighting a more often than not fatal disease. The prince and princess' speech wasn't really her main priority by then.

"It's because you passed out during the conversation," Robin informs her.

Oh! Indeed, now she does recall the castle's hallway and Snow's face being replaced by darkness as she felt herself falling. Regina looks at him with wide understanding eyes. Right…

She runs a hand over her forehead, its wetness making her wince. She doesn't relinquish her hold on the towel the thief gives her, and she absentmindedly wipes her face. She knows what's going to happen. She knows what the outcome is most of the time. She accepts it. Whatever happens to her, no one will miss her anyway. Henry doesn't remember her existence, her father is dead. She has no one left, no reason to fight.

"How long do I have before falling back asleep?"

The thief confusedly eyes her. "What?"

She stops herself from rolling her eyes to the back of her head, instead explains. "You're the only one here, I take it that you've had the disease in the past. Either that or you're a complete fool."

"Oh!" Robin exclaims, then confirms. "I did. Got sick, I mean. And I don't know. It depends on the person. But you should use this time to eat and drink something," He declares immediately before she has the chance to interrupt him. This man is either stupid or extremely stubborn. "You haven't eaten anything since this morning, and it's almost sundown."

He gets up immediately, coming back with his hands full of food that he places in front of her. She won't admit it to him, but she's starving, so she eats willingly, quenching her thirst with large glasses of water while she secretly watches him from the corner of her eye as he does the same.

Once she's done, she places the plates on her nightstand, feeling the fever come back. She settles herself comfortably and pulls the cover to her chest, sighing. This is it. She can feel it coming back, knows it won't take long, and truth be told she doesn't want to let a stranger play nanny with her. She's not a child. She's a grown-up woman who can take care of herself, and has accepted her fate. She doesn't need anyone's pity.

"Make sure you take everything to the kitchen on your way out."

He must not have been expecting this, because the thief almost chokes on his water while staring at her with wide incredulous eyes. "I'm sorry?"

"I don't need you to stay, I'm fine," she assures neutrally.

"The fever is back, and you're going to fall back asleep very soon."

Good observation, Captain Obvious! Regina clenches her fists.

"I can take care of myself!"

"Not when you're in this state." He tries to reason. This man is a fool, she thinks. Had she been her normal self, she would've shut him up with a flicker of her wrist. "This disease could kill you."

"I'm well aware," she retorts. Damn, will he leave her alone?

"Then let me help! You can talk to me about your dreams."

Oh, how laughable this idea is! Sharing her dreams and deepest fears with an annoying stranger. Such a wonderful idea!

"You have to let some things out if you want to be able to stand the pain it's bringing upon you."

"Talk to you about my dreams?" Regina scoffs. "And then what? We share stories of our childhoods, go horseback riding together, become best friends? Certainly not. And after all, what makes you think I won't be able to survive it on my own?" She challenges bitterly, defensive.

"I remember what you were ready to do when you first entered this castle. I remember how desperate you were."

Regina crosses her arms over her chest. She needs to make him believe that she's strong enough if she wants him to leave the room. "I'm not that person anymore," she assures with her most convincing voice.

"Aren't you?" He questions with a lifted eyebrow. "That was barely a few months ago, and the situation hasn't changed much for you. The loss of a child isn't easy to overcome. And this disease, this magic, poison or whatever it is, is able to use your pain against you."

Touché.

Regina looks away, unable to hold his gaze much longer when the memory of her son hits her.

What does the thief think? That Henry is the center of her nightmares? That Henry is the cause of her pain, the figure used by the poison to torture her? He has a son himself, he should know that your own child can't be used to cause the parent so much pain.

But she won't tell him that. She won't tell him who is behind her worse nightmares.

"It isn't," she says simply, the image of her son easing her ill-temper and annoyance.

"Look, Regina, I know-"

Regina's face snaps up to glare at him in shock.

"It's Your Majesty!" She thunders. "How dare you call me by my name, thief?"

His face falls, scrunching in apology, "I apologize. I just got used to it today. It's hard to talk to someone who's asleep and call them by a title instead of a name."

This man is a fool. How did he survive so long in the Enchanted Forest without getting his head chopped for disrespect? But that's not her problem anymore. Her eyes are closing by themselves, her strength abandoning her. So she lies down.

"You better remember it when we're in public. This is no proper way to…"

xxx

Unlike the previous time, it's the middle of the day, and for a second Regina closes her eyes and enjoys the ray of sun washing over her face.

This doesn't look so much like a nightmare. Is it over? Did she already win?

"Ah, there you are!"

Apparently, it isn't...

"I've been looking for you, my dear wife!"

Regina barely has time to turn around to face him, that the soft atmosphere that was enveloping her disappears, replaced by a room made of stones, barely lit by torches, without any windows. It feels so cold and dark that Regina shivers, hugging herself, and stepping back when Leopold walks closer.

"You can hit me all you want," she says, surprising herself for being able to answer. "But you won't win."

Her husband grins at her, a wicked smile that speaks all the evil he has planned. "Oh, but I'm done beating you up. I have other plans for you."

And before she realizes, Regina feels her face being plunged in freezing water, the shock of temperature making her gasp in surprise, her mouth opening and being invaded by water, burning the inside of her throat, replacing the air of her lungs with water.

She struggles, tries to back out of this situation, feeling her body drowning, each cell of her system screaming in agony, desperately looking for air, but Leopold keeps her firmly in place. She opens her eyes, and her heart misses a beat when the water around her reveals a scene from her past. Powerless, struggling against the water invading her lungs and the lack of oxygen, Regina sees herself, joining Rumpelstiltskin and a woman, in the Enchanted Forest, several decades ago, tearing off the woman's still warm heart without flinching, and grinding it with one hand without the least hesitation.

Horror fills her as she remembers how it all started, when she remembers the moment when she fell on the other side, and succumbed to the darkness that led her to commit the worst atrocities.

She's projected in another place of the forest, sees two women walk through the forest. Snow White. And her, disguised as a peasant. Both staring ahead of them. Both facing hundreds of dead corpses littering the ground, all murdered. She remembers the pain in Snow's eyes and voice as she had realized who was responsible for that bloodbath.

Her.

The Evil Queen.

As she had realized there was no hope left for her.

"She did it. I take it back. It is too late for her. I could never forgive her. There is no good in that woman. None. I was wrong. There never was."

Suddenly, Regina is pulled backward and thrown on the ground, choking when air enters her burning lungs. For a moment, she's coughing, spilling water through her mouth and nose, a hand over her sore throat, struggling to make a coherent thought, eyes fixed upon the floor, trying to ease the aching tingling of her body, and calm her breathing.

But he doesn't give her time to.

"Did you see it?" Leopold spits, fingers grabbing her chin forcefully, watching her with madness. "Did you see what you are? The evil inside you?"

Regina shakes her head, but she's too weak to free herself from his grip.

"I've changed," she manages to say between two cough fits. "She was someone else."

Leopold drops her jaw and laughs wickedly. "You will never change. You can't! For one simple reason: It's who you are. You were born evil, and you will stay evil."

He pushes her using his foot, forcing her to straighten and face him. "A pretty face doesn't make everything, Regina. You have to be beautiful inside too. And when I look at you, all I see is how ugly and disgusting you are, and the demon that has taken possession of you."

He points at the wall, where a mirror is hanging, and the glass turns into a scene, showing her meeting with Sidney, reminds her how she tricked him into murdering her own husband, before blaming him for the crime and locking him into the mirror that had been his daily prison for decades.

"You make me sick," Leopold says as she watches the scene.

She takes no pride in this. Not anymore. By then, she had only seen in it a genius plan made to free her from her prison and give her the revenge she sought. Now… She only sees herself manipulating an innocent into murdering another man.

"I only married you out of pity, because I was indebted to you for saving my dear daughter's life, and you were too old for anyone else to want you as a wife."

Regina looks down, remembering her mother blaming her for not being married already ateighteen.

"I gave you a home, the life of a Queen, and you rewarded my generosity and goodness by having me murdered in my bed by a man you enchanted to make him fall in love with you, because you were too much of a coward to do the job yourself."

The scene changes, replaced by another one, that had happened little after she killed her husband: The funeral. She had held Snow White against her, pretending to share her grief, pretending to comfort her while she was victoriously smiling in her back, ready to strike and get rid of her.

"No wonder why I was so little interested in you. You were of barely any use, besides your poor attempts at mothering my sweet Snow White. Why my little girl cared about you, I have no idea. And you, in your stupidity, you wasted half her life trying to kill her. What kind of monster are you to go after someone so innocent and pure?"

This time, the entire environment around them changes, turns into another place, a modern one... A familiar one. Too familiar.

Henry...

Regina attempts to step forward, but she's held back by Leopold firmly, until the realization of what the scene is hits her, and her blood runs cold.

She watches with difficulty as her son rejects her, and runs outside his bedroom, away from her. She faces her other self alone, inside her mansion, witnesses her son walk through the door with David. A feeling of loneliness seizes her guts, her heart broken at the memory, the pain weighting on her chest, stronger than ever, almost halting her breath.

"Look at you now! A boy you adopted to fill your loneliness, who doesn't even consider you his mother, who ran away from you, then was more than glad to forget your very existence."

Another switch of environment.

Granny's dinner.

Her, again, alone at a table, while everyone else celebrates Mary Margaret and Emma's return from the Enchanted Forest.

"An entire kingdom waiting for your death. Pity in the eyes of the only ones who pretend to care about you, because they are too kind to abandon the burden that you are."

Regina doesn't even fight the tears streaming down her face now. Leopold is right. She caused so many damages, hurt so many people. Her own son. No wonder why no one wants to be near her. She's a monster!

"Such a shame. Your parents must be so disappointed."

Regina senses what's coming, braces herself for the scenes that will follow.

"Oh wait! You killed them too, didn't you?"

Her mother lying in her arms.

"You would've been enough"

"Not even able to be grateful towards the poor and unfortunate souls who gave you life and had to stand your presence until I finally got them rid of you."

Regina tenses, closes her eyes in anticipation, but then the images happen before her closed eyelids, not giving her a moment's rest.

"I believe, given the chance, we can find happiness together. But the choice is yours."

"I think you're right. I can be happy."

She wants to stop it. She has to stop it. Her. Herself. She can't do that! She can't! She-

"Daddy, no!" She screams, but it doesn't stop the scene, it can't. She can't undo the past. She can't make up for her mistakes.

"Just not here."

Regina lets out a broken scream as she watches her former self plunge her hand into her father's chest, removing the organ, barely glancing at the body falling on the ground.

This is what she is. This is what she does. Sacrifice the ones she loves to fulfill her evil wishes. Murdering thousands of people. And in the end, being, and staying alone.

The pain is so strong that Regina falls to her knees, hands on the ground, crying her heart out, her heartbreak, her shame. She is and will always be the most evil human being that has set foot on Earth. Why would she deserve to live?

"The world would be better if you'd be dead!"

When she looks up at her husband, all Regina can see, is the blade that's about to run through her.

xxx

Regina inhales sharply, a gulf of air entering her lungs as she opens her eyes, blinded for a moment by the light of day.

She sits up, taking deep breaths, looking around her, wondering where he is, where she is, what happened exactly, he was about to-

And she jumps back.

Who is this man?

"What…" she tries, but her voice is rough, tainted with anguish and remnants of sobs, so she swallows, clears her thoughts, calms herself, attempts to speak again. "What are you-" And then, she remembers. The thief. The fever. Still, she asks, just to be certain. "Am I- Am I awake? Is this real?"

"Yes. You're awake," Robin replies, his calmness appeasing the anxiety overwhelming her.

"So he… he's not… I'm-"

She's still struggling to recover, to come back to the real world, her breath short, her voice weak. She shakes her head slightly as if it would put some order in her brain, help her see the situation more clearly.

Alright, you're safe now. Calm down. It's okay, he's not here, he can't hurt you.

When her eyes land on the thief again, he must take it as his cue to speak, because he offers. "Do you want to talk about them? Your nightmares. This man you're seeing there."

Just the mention of him, of that place, makes Regina shiver, a surge of panic washing over her, and she forces herself to stay still and control it.

Robin must have sensed her anguish, because he adds softly. "It's your choice, but it could help."

Regina straightens, brings a hand to her stomach, where she felt the aim of the blade penetrate her body, and remembers their earlier conversation, how he thought that Henry was behind all of this. How could he understand what she's going through?

"You wouldn't believe me."

"Try me," he challenges, a hand covering her shoulder.

Regina looks at it, at this simple gesture that brings her more comfort than she thought, and for a second, she allows herself to enjoy the warmth that emanates from his hand, and spreads through her, replacing her nightmares and self-loathing with a general feeling of care and compassion.

Maybe he could help. Maybe he can help her survive this. But does she deserve it? Is there still a chance for her to be saved?

"I'm a villain. Villains don't get happy endings."

"You're not a villain." This touch, on her shoulder. His touch. Henry's. Her wonderful son. It's the same touch she feels right now, bringing her the same comfort, a profound love and satisfaction invading her when she remembers the next words. "You're my mom."

"Who is hurting you, Your Majesty?"

Regina looks back at Robin when he asks the question, tilting her head to the side and frowning.

You can do this.

However, she reassures herself with a last glance in the room, making sure that this is real and not a trick of her mind. When reassurance has settled in her mind, she lies down, wrapping herself in the cover and using it as a blanket of comfort.

"My husband."

The thief must not believe her, because he asks. "King Leopold?"

She nods shakily, shivering at the thought of her husband.

"What does he do? How is he hurting you?" He questions softly.

Regina frowns, trying to make some sense into her foggy mind.

"He's not… hurting me." She corrects. "I mean… In those dreams, he is. But not when… Not before…" She sighs painfully, failing in suppressing a small whimper, covering her face with a hand. This is too hard, she's not strong enough. Tiredness has taken possession of her body and mind again, she feels like her brain is slower, unable to make a coherent thought. "This is so confusing."

But Robin shushes her softly, his gentle tone soothing her pain. "That's okay. Take your time." He pauses, as if giving her the time she needs, before resuming. "Try to speak only of one thing for a start. Choose between dream and reality."

And Regina listens. She closes her eyes, tries to picture two different realities, and makes her decision.

"He never… In real life…" She pauses, and then corrects, to help herself make the distinction easier. "In this life, when we were married, he never… He never…" Damn, just say it! "He wasn't… He wasn't mean to me," she manages. "I mean… Not in the way men can be to their wives. He just… It's like I wasn't even there."

Robin frowns in confusion. "I don't follow."

Regina gives him a sympathetic small smile. He seems like a nice man, doesn't know her story. He probably never foresaw that the Evil Queen could have been in pain at some point in her life. That it could have been the reason for everything.

"He married me so I would mother his child. Not to have a wife or a Queen."

"So he ignored you?"

She shrugs, continues her tale in a sturdier, however weak, voice, letting everything out helping her more than she anticipated.

"You could say that. Whether he was here or not, it wouldn't make much difference for me. I ate alone, walked through the castle alone, spent each day waiting for it to end, with no expectations whatsoever. Besides Snow White, no one would speak to me, because it was forbidden. It only changed whenever either I was called in his bedroom at night or not. That's the only moment when he remembered my existence."

Regina takes a moment, pushing away from her mind those unwanted moments.

"So no. He never hurt me. At least not on purpose. But he made my life miserable. He was the reason I was stuck in this place, instead of living my life outside. Those who've never experienced it can't tell, but loneliness is a much worse punishment than death."

And it was. She may have had servants, knights, beautiful dresses and jewelry, but she craved for a simpler life, one made of a real family, of children of her own, of friends and laughter, of parties that she really enjoyed instead of watching everyone else have fun, while she only waited for it to end.

Yeah, she'd love to know how it feels like. To have a family. To have a life you chose and that wasn't forced upon you.

"You know your life is different now, right?" Robin attempts carefully.

Wrong answer...

It isn't. She's still alone. She lost the only person who matters. People are still afraid of her. They still call her The Evil Queen. She's back to her old castle, the one she hated for so many years. Back to square one. Nothing changed.

"How so? They barely tolerate me, and if it wasn't for my powers, that they suddenly find very useful against my sister –another problem I'm sure they think I am responsible for," Regina sighs. "I am more than certain that they would ask me to leave them alone."

"Is this what it's telling you?" She looks at him with confusion, so he explains, "In your dreams. Is this what you see? What your husband says?"

She shrugs again, looks back at the wall behind him. It's easier than facing his blue eyes full of care and compassion. She's so not used to this that it feels a bit odd, even if it brings her a bit of comfort. But that's not something she's willing to admit. "Partly."

Can she say more? Can she open up to him? A stranger. An insufferable thief who ignores everything about her, and always saw her as the Evil Queen. How could he understand what her life's been like?

"Regina," he begins, pausing for a moment before resuming, his voice gentle but insistent. "You have to let it out. Not only what you've been through in your life, but also, and mostly, what you see in these dreams. You have to make a clear distinction between what's real, and what isn't. You have to realize that what this man tries to make you believe, isn't the truth."

Regina remembers the loneliness. The shock in her father's eyes when she tore his heart out. The fear of her own son at the thought of staying with her.

Henry may have forgiven her, but she cannot erase the past, the wrongs she caused, the deaths by hundreds, the betrayal of the only people she has ever loved. Nothing will ever fix that. And Henry won't come back to her. Without him, nothing makes sense anymore. He can't even remember the last words he said for her. He doesn't even know that she exists. Why fight the inevitable? The proof of what she is is right here, slamming her in the face every time she opens her eyes. She is the monster who led an entire Kingdom to its doom, and she only deserves to suffer alone.

"It feels like the truth," she murmurs.

"But it isn't," Robin insists gently. "I've been where you are, and I can assure you that everything you see and hear in these dreams, are the reflection of what you're afraid of. I know it's not easy to talk about it, but if you want to fight the illusions and hallucinations, that's the only way." He pauses, waits a beat, as if suddenly realizing the reason why she's not fighting the idea that her life isn't worth being lived. "You do want to, right? Fight the disease. Survive."

"I'm not sure," she admits. "Why fight?" She resumes. "What do I have left to fight for? They sent a stranger here, because none of them cared enough to help me."

"The Princess wanted to come, but-" He tries, but Regina cuts him with a scoff that lacks her usually sass and irony.

"Of course she wanted to. She wants to save everyone."

Robin leans back on his seat, frowning, his voice sounding slightly disappointed, which catches her attention and makes her look up at him.

"So you're back to that, then?"

She sends him a sad and defeated smile, knowing very well what he's referring to.

"I never stopped. Fighting a sister I never knew I had helped, for a little while, but we keep hitting dead end after dead end. People here barely tolerate me. I've forever lost my son. And I'm... tired. I just want all of this to be over."

"Don't speak like this."

"Like what?" She sighs, sensing her tiredness growing, struggling to keep her eyes open and her thoughts coherent.

"Like you're already dead. I won't give up on you, Regina. I won't let you drown into your own self-loathing. You deserve to live, just like any of us. You're not the same person you used to be."

She wants to laugh at him, but she doesn't have enough strength for that. "How can you know that?"

"Because I remember the woman who stood between a flying monkey and a child she didn't even know, and this woman is who you are now. You might be wearing your old clothes, you might be putting up an act, but you're not fooling me. I've seen beneath the mask, whether you want it or not, and what I saw, who I saw, is definitely not a merciless murderer. Not anymore."

"You don't know me." Talking becomes more difficult, and Regina senses the pull of the disease pulling her under, dragging her back towards her darkness.

"Maybe not." Robin indulges. "I don't know your story, besides the little you just revealed. But I can tell that you've changed, and that you, the woman I'm talking to right now, aren't the Evil Queen."

"That's what they keep calling me," she points out.

"They need time."

"I don't have time," she breathes, her eyes closing on their own accord. And there we go again. "I don't have much… much time left."

She thinks she hears him scream "No!" and rush to her, but she can't be certain as the darkness envelops her again.

xxx

"Ah, there you are!"

This time, Regina doesn't even have time to fully wake up. A white light blinds her, forbidding her to identify her environment, to simply open her eyes. She moves with difficulty, struggling to sit up, then move on her knees. She's barefoot, and the stone-floor is cold, seizing her like spines.

When will it finally end?

"I started to believe you didn't want to come back," Leopold sneers in her ear.

Regina shivers, shutting her eyes tight as if it would protect her against her husband. What has he planned now?

"Are you ready to reach the next level of our little game?"

Regina blinks several times, accommodating to the light now that it's back to a normal level, and faces her husband's amused smile.

"What do you-"

"Schhhh..." Leopold shushes her, his forefinger against his lips. His smile widens, and he opens his arms, looking around him and stepping back. "Listen."

Regina freezes. Something is about to happen, and she has no idea what it is. She stays rooted to the spot, attentive, glancing around, in search for a move, a sound, anything.

Until...

"Mom?"

She jumps, her eyes opening wide, her heart beating faster and stronger in her chest.

"Henry?"

How is that possible?

She takes a step forward, her voice full of hope. "Henry, is it you?"

"Mom, are you here?"

Regina's heart misses a beat, and she fights the sudden wave of relieved sobs that invades her chest.

"Yes, Henry, I'm here. Where are you?"

"I'm in the castle."

"Where exactly?" Regina replies.

"I don't know. I'm in a room. It's all dark."

"Can you get out?"

"No. I tried, but the door is locked."

Of course it is... Leopold must have made sure of that. Speaking of him, that bastard has left the room. There's a knot in her stomach, twisting her insides, that only grows stronger when Regina looks at the lonely door in front of her. She's pretty sure that there will be traps, but she doesn't have a choice. Henry's counting on her.

Full of a renewed energy, she walks forward, her shaky hand on the doorknob.

"Don't worry, honey. I'm coming."

She tries to be reassuring, but even she can hear her voice falter, full of uncertainty and anxiety. Hopefully, she'll get to Henry before anything bad happens.

Take a deep breath. Just do it and you'll be reunited with your son.

She takes a deep breath, before pushing the door open.

It's deafening. Regina falls on her knees with the intensity of the shock, hands covering her ears, eyes closed tightly, the sound pulsating in her ears, making her feel as if her head was about to explode.

Screams.

Everywhere.

Mixed with sounds of a crackling fire, of a blade slicing a throat, of chains holding someone prisoner.

Desperate calls of children being separated from their parents.

Screams of people being slaughtered, burnt alive, imprisoned, ripped from their families.

Screams of the people she murdered.

She knows who they are, knows why she hears them. It's her punishment. She deserves this, deserves this suffering. She caused so much pain, has destroyed so many innocent lives.

Her own pain is so strong that soon, Regina's screams are mixed with them, tears rolling down her cheeks, burning her skin like acid.

"Mom?"

So many people. She killed so many of them, yet never even got what she wanted. This is a waste. She is a failure.

A monster.

"Mom, are you still here?"

Regina opens her eyes, stops screaming, lending a more attentive ear, trying to make out something coherent out of this cacophony.

"Mom?"

Henry!

Henry needs her!

She gets up with difficulty, takes a few steps forward, feeling it hard to move, as if something was pushing her backward.

But she fights.

For her son, the light of her life, she fights. She stares firmly at the exit in front of her, drags herself there, closing her eyes when the intensity of the screams increases, trying to take a deep breath when the overwhelming sounds knock the breath out of her lungs.

She grabs the knob, opens the door, and the screams suddenly stop. The change is so strong that Regina almost loses her balance, holding herself to the door, that she quickly closes behind her now that the invisible bounds holding her have vanished.

She falls to the floor, breathless, her head still buzzing with screams, trying to refocus.

"Mom?"

She takes a second, then replies. "Yes, Henry. I'm here."

"Are you okay? I heard you screaming."

Regina shakes her head. "I'm fine, honey. I'm on my way."

She gets up, pulls herself together the best she can, readies herself, and opens the next door.

Unlike the previous room, this one is perfectly quiet, not a sound to be heard. But it's also perfectly dark. As the door closes behind her, Regina finds herself surrounded by darkness. Unable to see, she doesn't move at first, not knowing where she is, where to go. It takes her a few seconds, but then she takes a step forward, then another, arms outstretched in front of her, breath short. Her steps are hesitant, slow, making sure that there's nothing standing in her way, no gap she might fall into. For what feels like eternity, completely disoriented, she blindly walks ahead of her, avoiding the objects that stand on her way, until, finally, she finds something.

A wall.

A wall, but where is the door.

How am I going to find it?

Fumbling in the dark, Regina searches a knob, deciding to explore the wall at her right first. She fights her growing frustration, tempers her need to scream, ignores the anxiety telling her she should be faster than that.

"Mom?"

Regina's senses awaken when she notices Henry's alarming tone.

"What is it, honey?"

"Someone is trying to open the door."

Regina straightens, body rigid, alert. "Who?"

"I don't know."

Regina feels panic invade her, her breathing accelerates, her search for a way out faster, but clumsier. She can hear it now, the sound of someone fumbling with the lock of a door. She lets out a raging breath, her fist hitting the wall hard in frustration.

She's running now. She falls more than once when she hits unidentified objects, hurting her ribs, arms or legs in the process, thinking she might have broken her ankle as she hears a loud crack, and an overwhelming pain spreads in her left foot and leg. But she gets up, limping, slower, suppressing a scream with each step she takes. She doesn't stop searching, attempting to reassure her son who's starting to freak out, until finally, her hand bumps against what feels like a doorknob.

She doesn't lose any more time, and pushes the door open. She faces a narrow spiral staircase, and lets out an exhausted sighs as her ankle reminds herself to her. She tentatively climbs the first step, and crashes against the stonewalls, suppressing a painful scream. The pain in her ankle is so strong that she thinks she might vomit, but the voice of her son begging someone to stay away from him reminds her of what's at stake.

"Henry," she manages, rising onto her hands and looking upstairs. "Hold on, I'm almost there."

Truth be told, she doesn't know where she is, where he is, she has no idea if she can join him in time, but what she knows, is that she'll be damned if she doesn't! She is ready to give her life for her son, and if that's what this masquerade is about, as long as Henry is safe, she doesn't give a damn about what happens to her.

She painfully gets up, letting out a loud cry when she hears another crack, shifts her weight to her other foot. She keeps going, step after step, progressing on all fours the best she can, not stopping for one second until she reaches the top of the stairs with a relieved sigh. She wipes her sweaty forehead with her sleeve, takes a minute to recover, only to feel her blood freeze in her veins.

"No! Mom! Mom, help me!"

His voice is close, closer than before, and Regina looks up, noticing a door in front of her, half opened. Henry's there.

She falls several times as she rushes across the hallway, but she rises every time, if so tries to speed up and almost crashes against the door, swinging it open instantly.

"HENRY!"

Her son is here, held by Leopold, who's keeping a sharp blade right under his throat, and victoriously grinning at her.

"Mom!" Her son calls, tears at the corner of his eyes, panicking.

"I'm here, honey," she assures, unable to enjoy the vision of her son as he's being held prisoner and threatened to be killed by the very man who ruined her existence. "Let him go! He has nothing to do with this," she tells Leopold with the strongest voice she can manage.

But all he does is laugh at her. A mad, wicked laugh that seizes her to the gut.

"On the contrary, dear. He's exactly where he needs to be."

Before Regina can move a finger, Leopold drops the knife and plunges his hand into Henry's chest, the boy gasping in shock. The King pulls out his shining and beating heart, stepping back and holding it for Regina to see, as his fingers begin to squeeze.

Henry bends in half, screaming, a hand over his chest, so Regina runs to him, almost falling and catching herself at the last second.

"Henry!" She turns towards her husband, eyes throwing daggers at him as she cradles her son against her chest. "Don't do this!" She threatens, but not really daring step away from her son.

Leopold watches her with a smile. "Oh, but I will." And before Regina can realize it, he's crushed the heart in his hand, leaving nothing but ashes as Henry's body crumbles in her arms, lifeless.

"Henry, no! Henry, please answer me!" She begs as she falls on her knees, shaking him as if she could wake him up, holding him close to her chest, sobs overwhelming her and making her choke several times.

"Wake up, Regina!"

"Stay with me! Henry no, please!"

"Wake up! Listen to me!"

"What did you do?" She screams at Leopold, who revels in the scene he's watching.

"I didn't do anything," he states simply. "You did." In front of her confusion, he tilts his chin towards her. "Look."

Regina frowns, doesn't understand, so she follows his gaze, whispers another broken 'Henry' when her eyes land on her dead son.

Blood.

Everywhere.

She looks at her hands, and they are covered with blood.

"The blood of your son," Leopold says for her.

"Henry," Regina breathes, letting tears flow freely, guilt crashing down upon her, the realization of what she's done, assaulted by the memory of her son lying still in a hospital bed, on the ground on an island.

She caused this.

She did this to her son.

"Listen to my voice! It's Robin Hood. You're having a nightmare, Regina. What you see isn't real."

"You killed your father," Leopold resumes, not giving her a break. "You killed your son. Everything you do, everyone you touch, is destroyed by your evilness. You can't even protect the few people you loved. Trust me, they would have been far better if they had never met you."

"This isn't real, you hear me!"

The voice in her head is stronger, shaking her. Regina looks up from her bloodied hands and into her husband's eyes.

This isn't real.

xxx

She opens her eyes wide, staring ahead of her, confused.

What happened? Where is she? Where is Henry?

This isn't real, you hear me!

The voice... That voice... Was it true?

A movement to her right catches her attention, and she notices someone, a man that looks familiar... Robin! The thief. That's when Regina remembers.

The Dreamcatcher's bite. The nightmares. So that means... that means Henry is still alive!

She loses control of her emotions when she falls into Robin's arms, her body shaken by a sob as her head falls against his shoulder.

She shouldn't. They don't know each other, and this could be considered improper. But she's done. She doesn't have any strength left, physical or psychological. Her entire body hurts from the pain she was put through. She can't stop her tears from falling, and she coughs several times, feeling Robin's arm wrap around her shoulder and rub her back soothingly.

"It's alright, Regina. It wasn't real, none of it was. You're awake now, you can let it go."

There's a slight pressure around her wrist, warm and soft, and she realizes that his fingers are wrapped it gently… She should take her hand back.

She should.

But she needs comfort, and he's providing it, so she links their fingers, relieved when she feels him answer her touch by closing his hand over hers as he keeps whispering soothing words to her ear.

"Breathe, Regina."

She's shaken by a coughing fit, so he slightly tightens his grip on her.

"It's okay. You're okay. Calm down. I've got you."

His softness, his care, open a breach in Regina's heart and thick shield. He wants to help her. And as she remembers the relief at hearing her son's voice, then his face, dead in her arms, the pain that choked her to the point she thought she wouldn't survive his loss, Regina tells herself that it's time.

It's time to fight back. If it means opening up to a stranger, then so be it.

She breathes in, attempts to explain, struggling against the still vivid memory of her dead son, the sight of the blade about to run through her.

"He... He wanted... He..."

When she thought he would encourage her to speak, instead, she hears him says. "He's gone. He won't hurt you."

But she needs to talk about him. She's decided to fight back now. There's no way she'll give up and stays stuck in a world where her son doesn't exist anymore.

"No," she replies firmly, startling him and even herself with the resolution in her voice and attitude as she looks up at him. "If I go back there, if he wins and I die, he will never stop hurting me. I will go back to this life I hated for so long. I will never move on."

She takes a slow, deep, determined breath, using her last strength to show him her determination.

"I need you to help me survive this." And then, she voices something she didn't think was possible, but she will do anything in her power for it to become true. "I need you to help me survive so I can see my son again, and leave my past behind me."

He looks at her intensely, and simply nods.

So she takes a deep breath, and begins explaining.

"My husband... In my dreams," she adds, always to make sure that she's talking about her dreams and not reality. "He makes me pay. He makes me pay for everything I've done. At first, he was beating me up. In the land without magic, they call it domestic violence and it's punished by the law. I tried to fight back. But I quickly realized that something forbade me to. All I could do was receive his punches, while he screamed at me that he was finally taking care of me." She feels Robin flinch, so she squeezes his hand and smiles gently. "But it didn't break me. I mean... I knew it was too far from my life with him to be real, so it didn't affect me as much as it could have. So when he realized it wasn't working..."

She pauses, because she needs a moment, because what he did is still fresh in her mind, and even if she knows it wasn't real, part of what he said was true.

Robin's hand squeezes hers. This time it's his turn to smile at her, and Regina finds in his compassionate blue eyes and kindness the necessary strength to go on.

"He tried to drown me," she says. "I felt the water enter my lungs, I struggled against the lack of air and thought I was about to faint. That's when the memories began."

"Memories?"

"Memories of my past. He reminded me all of the wrongs I've done. The people I've murdered or condemned. He showed them to me, I could rewatch the scenes and witness myself kill and deceive people. He showed me my parents' deaths," she confesses, her head looking down, a sigh escaping her lips. "Reminded me that I was responsible for them. He showed me the monster in me, told me that because of what I had done, I wasn't worthy of love and care, that the reason I've always been alone is because no one could appreciate someone like me. He reminded me of when my son ran away from me. And in the end, in this last dream, my husband..." Regina takes a deep breath in, closing her eyes for a second and shaking her head as if to shake away the memories. "He killed him. My son. He made me believe that I could save him, but I arrived too late."

She swallows down her tears and sobs, forces herself to continue, to convince herself that it wasn't real, Henry is safe in the land without magic, no one can hurt him. Robin is silent, but his thumb rubs the back of her hand softly, and this simple gesture anchors her to reality.

"He said I was responsible for his death, for my father's. That's my hands were sullied with the blood of my own child." She shivers, tugs at the covers a little. "I know what I've done. I won't deny the lives I took and the mistakes I've made. I have..."

Say it. He won't judge you, so just let it all out.

"I have killed my own father." Regina admits, avoiding Robin's gaze at first, then forcing herself to look at him. You have to accept it. Just like she expected, he's looking at her with kindness, not judgmental whatsoever, and Regina feels relief invade her. So she doesn't stop. "And my son died because of me."

"Almost."

Regina frowns in confusion, so Robin corrects. "He almost died. Henry is still alive."

She nods, curses herself for making the confusion, and then corrects. "Henry almost died because of me. But," she breathes in. "I am not this woman anymore. I refuse to believe it. Even if Henry hasn't forgiven me-"

"He has."

Again, she looks at him, confused.

"He has forgiven you, Regina. I heard you talk about him with the princess."

Regina smiles, a lump forming in her throat and relief washing over her as she lets the words Robin said appease her sorrow.

He's right.

Henry has forgiven her. He knows she loves him. And he loves her.

She remembers now.

"You're not a villain. You're my mom."

How could she forget? She remembers how much he loves her. And that he forgot about her existence. Her smile falls a little, so she meets Robin's gaze, finding in his eyes the compassion and support she needs. Unlike so many, what she reads in those orbs isn't pity, disgust, or hate.

No.

Instead, she reads understanding, sees a connection she never anticipated. She feels grateful.

It takes her a moment, but she understands. Robin wasn't sent against his will. He volunteered to help. And that, is more than anything she's ever had in life.

"He has," she confirms. She pauses, realizes that the tiredness is growing stronger, so she squeezes his hand. "Robin?"

"Yes?"

"It's time," she says simply.

Nodding, he helps her lie down, brings the covers up to her chin, and sits by the side of the bed.

Regina takes his hand again. "Thank you."

Robin smiles brightly, thumb brushing the back of her hand. "Don't forget the truth, Regina. Fight, and come back."

xxx

Regina opens her eyes, and realizes that she's lying on the ground, face against the floor. It's dark again, dark and cold. As she moves on her knees, then up, she notices that she's still in her old castle, but she seems to be alone this time.

The windows are wide opened, letting a strong icy wind run through the place. Regina hugs herself, shivering under her light dress, her bare feet becoming numb against the cold ground. She spots a closed door in front of her, but she hesitates.

What if it's a trap again?

But what are the risks? He will find a way to hurt you, and if you want to fight him, you have to get to the bottom of this dream.

Regina holds on to her determination, searching in her mind for the memories of her conversation with Robin, fighting to keep them alive even as she feels them slowly fading.

"Fight, and come back."

I will.

She takes resolute steps towards the door, swings it open wide, and enters the next room.

She faces a large room, and in its center, a coffin of glass. It sounds familiar, pushing Regina towards it, and when she sees the face of the body inside, she gasps.

"Daniel!"

His body is perfectly preserved, his youth untouched, and it tugs at Regina's heart to see him again.

You were so young, my love.

"Your first victim."

Regina jumps, looking around, searching for her husband, but he's nowhere to be seen.

"Dead. Because of you."

"I didn't kill him!" Regina screams. "I didn't do anything to-"

"Dead," Leopold cuts her firmly. "For daring to love you."

"I wasn't-"

"Dead," he repeats. "Because you were too selfish to let him go."

"What? No!"

But she's hit by a memory suddenly, remembering him, bent in half, face torn in agony.

"Stop! Just stop the pain."

It feels like a stab. Hearing his voice again, remembering the scene, losing him again. Bending forward, a hand over her stomach, Regina fights the tears, the heartbreak, the images of his beautiful face torn by a pain so intense he could barely speak. She thought that after so long, it would've passed. But he hasn't. The pain is still as vivid as it was on day one, tearing her heart apart.

"He suffered, because of you." Leopold's voice comes again. "Another victim of your evilness."

Regina feels the weight of guilt crash over her again, triggering her tears, but a voice in her head catches her attention.

"Fight, Regina. Don't let him win."

She looks up, frowning, wondering where it comes from, until it hits her. Robin! She straightens up, struggling against her foggy mind to hold on to the truth and good memories.

Ignoring the voice of her husband thundering in her ears, sending a last sad glance to Daniel's dead body, she runs towards the next door, and winces at the bright and warm light that hits her face.

She protects her face with her arm, and take a step forward, instantly jumping back when a violent gust of wind whips her in the face. She stays still, and tries to open her eyes to apprehend her new environment. She's outside, on a bridge connecting two parts of the castle. The atmosphere is suffocating, overheated, preventing her from breathing fully, as if the air were deprived of oxygen. She manages to recognize a door on the other side of the bridge, about a hundred feet away.

Would it be that simple?

When an intense burning sensation spreads on her skin, Regina understands that no, it won't be that simple. Looking at the skin of her hands and arms, she realizes that it's become red, boiling, similar to a sunburn, or maybe even worse. She looks up at the sun, and lowers her head almost instantly, the pain on her face and in her eyes being unbearable.

I better get out of here fast if I don't want to roast on the spot.

She takes a first step, and the wind immediately rises, making her stagger under the surprise. She straightens up as she possibly can, tries to take a deep breath, but immediately regrets it. The passage of boiling air through her airways burns her as much as if she had swallowed acid. Regina chokes, coughs several times, trying to regain control, but every second she spends here turns her skin into a flap of burnt flesh, even through her clothes. She dares to look at her hands, and discovers them covered with blisters, almost raw. Realizing the urgency of the situation, she stares at the door in front of her, and starts running.

Okay, you can do it!

The more she runs, the more she feels as if her body was running into flames. The oppressive heat suffocates her, as she has trouble breathing, feeling like her lungs are on fire with each breath, her skin rotting under the sun.

But she doesn't stop. A scream of pain slips past her lips, sounding more like an injured animal than a human being, and she almost falls with each step. But still, running.

"A burn for every person you burned alive." The voice of Leopold thunders above her. "This is only what you deserve."

Regina doesn't listen, closes her eyes, then opens them when she wobbles and almost falls, unable to breathe because her entire body is on fire. She can't breathe. She can't think. She can't feel anything other than the burnt skin. She doesn't really know how, but she makes it to the door, crashing against it and falling to the ground, breathless, dizzy, trembling from head to toe and desperately trying to get control over herself as her body suffers excruciating pain. She takes a moment to come back to normal breathing, the burning sensation lingering in her entire airways. Every time she inhales or exhales, it hurts, stopping her from properly breathing, and recovering. It takes her time, but at some point, she manages to feel strong enough to go on.

She dares look at her arms, at her skin that has turned white and has a cardboard quality covered with multiple blisters. She attempts to sit up, breathing out deeply in anticipation before moving, wiping her sweaty forehead with her sleeve, and jumping as it only triggers the pain.

But then, she remembers what's at stake, why she's here. She needs to get out of here, sooner rather than later. When her gaze rises, Regina realizes that the room is actually a huge pool of water. She can't see the bottom, which implies a certain depth. But if she doesn't know what to expect, she suspects that it will be much more complicated than simply swimming the 50 feet to the exit.

Carefully, she plunges a leg inside the water, sighing at the feeling soothing her scorched skin, not dropping her guard, because there must be a trap somewhere. She takes one step after the other, glancing around her, holding her breath, moving forward, her body now immersed to the waist, but nothing happens.

Something brushes her leg, and Regina startles and stills.

The cry of a newborn.

She swirls around, but there's nothing.

"What is- Ah!"

A hand catches her arm, another wraps around her ankle. Regina pushes them away, but they are replaced by others, more hands, triggering screams of panic as she feels herself surrounded by so many people she can't even make out their faces.

"Your victims." She hears as she fights to free herself from their grip. "All of your victims."

"Let me go!" Regina screams, pushing at them, trying to step forward, but something –someone?- blocks her ankle, making her lose her foothold and fall in the water. The creatures drag her towards the bottom, grabbing her from everywhere, preventing her from fighting back. There's a flash in front of her, making Regina freeze, and that's when she can finally see clearly one of the creatures.

A child.

Her skin pale as death, grey eyes empty looking right through her. Her blonde hair flying around her face.

She did this. She killed this innocent child.

And as she stares at her, Regina takes into all the others, children, women and men. All dead, because of her.

The surprise has Regina inhaling sharply, but she regrets it instantly as water enters her lungs, suffocating her. At this moment, facing the consequences of her choices, the deaths by dozens, hundreds maybe, she's tempted to give in, to accept her fate, to stop fighting and just pay the price of her actions. It would be easier. Once dead, she wouldn't suffer anymore. She wouldn't cause any more pain. She wouldn't endanger anyone else.

"Hold on, Regina! It's not real."

This voice...

Regina can't think clearly, the lack of air becoming unbearable. Yet, the voice keeps resonating in her mind.

"Don't give up! Fight! Nothing you see is real."

A flash of lucidity allows her to see a face, the one of a man with blond hair and blue eyes, eyes showing a tenderness she's not used to, a tenderness that envelops her and makes her feel warm and safe. His hand covers hers, his thumb stroking the back of her hand.

Robin, she remembers. And then it hits her, the fog over her brain vanishing enough to let her remember once again. This isn't real. I have to get out of here!

So, she fights.

She fights the creatures, her victims, tries to get back to the surface with the little energy she has left, despite the lack of air. But her efforts are in vain, as she doesn't even manage to free herself from their grip before she knows she won't make it up there in time.

She's drowning.

The burn and pressure on her chest morphing into pain, unbearable pain, desperation surrounding her every sense. Yet she has to calm down. She has to survive.

For Henry.

Regina closes her eyes, and focuses, even though her chest is beginning to contract. Even though her heartbeat is slowing down. She focuses.

This isn't real.

She digs deep into her memory, tries to remember her talks with Robin, her acceptance of her past, the knowledge that this is only a nightmare caused by a disease she has to overcome.

This isn't real.

She's dizzy, struggling to stay conscious, to make a coherent thought, and despite all of her will, she's afraid she doesn't have any strength left to survive.

I love you, Henry. Wherever you are, even if you don't remember me, I will always love you.

It's the end. She knows it is. If nothing happens soon, she won't make it alive.

I'm sorry, Robin. I did everything I could, but I wasn't strong enough.

A gulf of air enters her lungs as she falls on the hard floor, hurting her shoulder, head and back, but Regina doesn't care as she coughs, spilling out water through her mouth and nose, taking support on her arm to sit up, her body shaken by a violent cough, trembling from head to toe.

When the cough has faded and Regina's mind is clearer, she looks up, stares at the empty room in confusion.

They're gone.

The water.

The dead bodies.

Did I really do this? Did it work?

She slowly gets up, wobbling and almost falling, feeling the weakest she's ever been, yet strangely, somehow stronger.

She looks at the door in front of her.

The last one.

And with a resolute step, she opens it, and enters the final room.

She instantly steps back, catching herself on the door, her heart missing a beat when she faces the scene. Larges crosses, everywhere around her, easily ten feet long and six feet large. And on each of them, attached by their wrists, a body. Dead, there's no doubt about it. She walks closer, fighting her anxiety, feeling her breathing and heart rate accelerate as the sight is difficult to stand.

She jumps back, her injured legs barely carrying her anymore, so she lands on the ground.

Henry.

Daddy.

Mother.

She looks at her right.

Mary Margaret.

David.

Emma.

At her left.

Roland.

Robin.

She stays frozen, unable to look away, walking to her son, suppressing the tears that gather in her eyes.

I'm sorry, Henry.

Attracted by a force she can't explain, she turns towards the thief and his son, tentatively sending a hand forward. The little boy's skin is cold as ice, his body unresponsive to her touch, but Regina can't help a soft caress of his cheek. She hates to admit it, but even if she hasn't spent a lot of time with him, she does have a soft spot for children, and this one has stolen a part of her heart. And the thief… Robin. He's done more for her in a few days than most in her entire life.

"Now, you know what will happen to them."

She swirls around, facing her husband, and forces herself to straighten up and keep her chin high despite the fear twisting her guts.

I told you I'd come back, Robin. And I will.

"If you go back, they will all die. All because of you." Leopold continues, stalking towards her, his mad smile still plastered on his face. "Because you destroy everything and everyone you touch."

Regina glances at Henry's body, feeling anger boiling within her, the sight of his dead body triggering her strongest instincts. She's his mother, and there is no way she'll cause him any suffering. Not anymore. Not now that she's learned her lesson and changed. Leopold's tricks won't work anymore.

She faces her husband without flinching, feet rooted on the ground.

"You're wrong," she counteracts. "I am not this woman anymore. And I'll protect my son and everyone else with everything I have, until my last breath. I will not hurt them again."

She plunges her hand in his chest, watching him gasp in horror when she pulls out his beating heart.

"Now you let me go back to them, or I'll crush your heart right here and now."

Leopold's surprise vanishes, replaced by a large smirk.

"Do it!" In front of Regina's confusion, he adds. "Crush it! Show me who you really are, Regina."

Regina frowns, glances between the beating organ in her palm and her husband's face. What is he saying?

"This is your final test," he explains. "Maybe crushing my heart will bring you back there. Or maybe it won't. Now, you have to make a choice."

Regina looks at him in horror. How can she know what the right decision is?

"So," Leopold resumes. "What will you decide?"

xxx

"Regina?"

That voice...

"Regina, do you hear me?"

Robin?

She slowly opens her eyes, sighing as she does, so exhausted that she feels like she could sleep for days. Ironical, given the fact that it's exactly what she just did. She rolls on her side, and faces him. His blue eyes carrying so much goodness, his comforting smile, fill her with the same warmth that she felt during her nightmares, wiping away some remnants of the lingering pain and self-loathing.

She feels herself blush as she smiles softly at him, so she averts his gaze, glancing around her to the room, the immensity of the Enchanted Forest she can see through the window.

Finally.

Regina pushes herself up tiredly, sitting and exhaling softly.

"It's over," she breathes.

She turns towards him with a relieved and grateful smile, seeing him frown, so she explains as she swings her legs over the edge of the bed to face him fully.

"He's gone. Leopold is gone."

Robin's proud smile accentuate his dimples, showing a charming sigh of him Regina hadn't seen until now. "You did it."

She hides her inner turmoil, focuses on the conversation instead. "I did. It wasn't easy, he almost got me, but… I beat him." She breathes in awe, not believe it herself. She really thought she wasn't going to make it out of there alive. "I'm definitely rid of him."

"How do you feel?"

Regina ducks her head to the side and shrugs. "Tired." And then, even though it's not needed, she explains. "Even if I spent my time sleeping, it wasn't really a restful one."

"I bet. So…" Robin begins carefully, and she knows what he's about to ask. "How did you do it? How did you survive?"

"I kept telling myself none of it was real, not even the words he was saying. Instead, I focused on what you and I talked about, what you tried so hard to convince me of."

"That you deserve to live."

"Yes," she admits. "Also, that I am not who I was, that I've changed. That my son wouldn't want me to give up."

"I'm glad it worked, and to see that you've finally accepted your past."

Regina nods. "Not completely, there's some more work to do for me to get there. But at least, I know my husband - ex-husband," she corrects before continuing, "cannot be used to hurt me anymore."

She looks down then, remembering all of his words, everything he said, but also and mostly, remembering the reason why he had been chosen to impersonate her worst and strongest fears.

"That's a good thing," Robin pauses. "I'm sorry, Regina."

She looks up, surprised, because why would he be? He didn't do anything wrong. On the contrary, he helped her survive. He has nothing to apologize for.

"That you had to live such a life for so long."

Regina breathes, grateful for his understanding, his kindness.

"I wish I had known you then. Maybe I could've helped."

She shakes her head. "My ex-husband wouldn't have let you."

"But he's not here anymore," Robin points.

He reaches out for her hand and squeezes her fingers softly, and Regina lets him, revels in this small gesture she knows won't be allowed once they'll have passed the doors.

"So if you need me to help you discover everything you missed during those years of loneliness, if you need a friend, or…" He pauses, and Regina waits, unsure of what he means, feeling the pounding of her heart in her ribcage, struggling to focus, overwhelmed by so many things, his voice, his eyes, the physical contact between them, his words. But Robin resumes, unaware of her turmoil. "know that you can come to me. Alright?"

"Thank you, Robin," she murmurs.

As she ducks her head to the side, a strand of hair escapes, falls over her face, and Robin reacts immediately. He brings a hand to her face, tenderly brushes it away, tucking it behind her ear. Regina watches him, mesmerized, unable to look away, unable to breathe. She's pulled to him by something unexplainable, unknown, and if at first she was afraid, now she isn't anymore.

So she doesn't pull back.

Instead, when she realizes that he's moving closer, she does too.

Until their lips meet.

The kiss is slow, soft, full of a tenderness she's never known, sending shivers running up and down her spine. He brings a hand to her neck, his palm sliding against her skin until he cups her nape, thumb rubbing her cheek, scooting closer on his seat to fully close the distance between them. She parts her lips willingly for him, lets him press his tongue against hers, enjoying the wonderful taste of him, the scent of forest that she once found annoying, now smelling amazing.

Her fingers have closed over his, and with her free hand she grabs his jacket, pulling him to her, and he's happy to oblige. In his arms, like this, she feels treasured, a wonder being explored. That's a feeling she's never experienced before, and she doesn't want it to stop.

She lies down, dragging him to her, and in the movement, he breaks their kiss. She's about to argue, but he cuts her short when she feels the softness and warmth of his lips and tongue against her neck.

There's no rush, no hurry. It's sweet, and soft, all made of tender touches and gentle caresses. It's everything she never knew, everything she's craving for, everything she never confessed, but for a reason that she ignores, Robin seems to understand her better than anyone, and gives himself entirely to her.

He teases her gently, running his tongue along her neck, and Regina's body instinctively arches. She doesn't resist him, allows herself to melt under his touch, to let it take control of her body because damn, after what she went through, after what they shared, after everything they discussed, she needs and wants this. With him. No one else. Maybe it's his kindness, the fact that he listened, understood, that they seem to share some kind of connection, that makes her open up so easily when she thought no man would ever touch her again.

She shivers when his hand moves along her waist, and she folds a knee, presses the inside of her leg against his thigh, welcoming him further between her legs, rocking tentatively, shyly, her message obvious though.

His behavior stays soft, but more engaging when he parts her feet with his owns to settle between her thighs, pressing his center to her core, showing her the proof of his desire when it presses hard against her stomach.

She holds back her moans though, despite her increasing desire, how much she needs him here and now, how much she wants him. He's taking care of her like she's a wonder, worshiping her body, his hand sliding under her dress and massaging the skin of her thigh, undressing her little by little. She lets him, wriggles a little to help him get her rid of her dress, sags comfortably in the mattress when they're done, and watches him right in the eyes, enjoying the sight of his eyes roaming over her almost naked body. She could be bothered by it, but the way he looks at her isn't insulting, on the contrary. It makes her feel beautiful.

When his fingers stop at the edge of her underwear, he bites his lower lip, waits for her.

"Yes," she whispers, smiling, shivering when his lips close over the skin of her inner thigh, the back of her head pressing hard into the mattress. "Robin... Ohh!"

Without a warning, he has moved his lips to her center, surprising her, and sending jolts of pleasure inside her that have her clenching her thighs. He swirls his tongue around her clit, kissing it softly, tasting her as he plunges it inside her, where no man's tongue has ever been. Regina closes her eyes, hands fisting the sheets, as her mouth opens in ecstasy. This is heaven, soothing her fresh wounds, replacing the last four day's torture by a pleasure so intense she feels boneless for completely different reasons than her initial tiredness.

But Regina wants more, she wants him, so she tugs at his shoulder, gently urging him to join her. She's breathless, can barely keep her eyes open, overwhelmed by the pleasure he gave her. She works on his clothes, helping him rid himself of them, and sighs contently when he leans atop of her, fully naked. He slips a hand between their bodies, his fingers finding one of her breasts, his thumb rubbing in circles over her nipple, making her moan in satisfaction, goosebumps flaring all over her skin.

She shyly rubs her pelvis against his, and the stimulation makes her speed up, desperate to feel him inside her. Robin links one of their hands, uses the other one to cup her chin, presses a soft kiss to her lips. They look at each other in the eyes, never breaking eye-contact when his hand moves between their bodies, and he guides himself inside her.

Regina exhales and closes her eyes contently, a soft moan escaping her lips when he begins to move, filling her entirely, and damn, this is so, so good. His forehead falls against her shoulder, and they both take a moment, while they slowly move in concert, to let this pleasure spread in them, from head to toe, enjoying every inch of each other's skin.

Regina closes her hand over his, her body tensing with the overwhelming pleasure he gives her, but it's nothing compared to the moment he straightens up and speeds up. She tries to hold back, to stay silent, or at least as quiet as possible, but he leans forward and whispers in her ear.

"Show me how you feel, Regina. Let me hear how good you feel. There's no rules, no good behavior. Just be."

Can she? Can she really?

And then she relaxes, because yes, she can. It's Robin, she shared much more with him within a few days than with anyone else in her entire life. So she lets it all out, doesn't hold back any moan or scream of pleasure, removes all the chains that were keeping her prisoner, until she feels herself clench over his shaft, her orgasm so powerful that it takes her breath away. She digs her fingernails into his back, trying to grab on something as her body convulses, her pleasure spreading when he comes inside of her.

Robin sags on top of her, drained, and Regina immediately wraps an arm around his back tenderly.

"Thank you."

Robin slowly pulls back, ducks his head to the side. "For what?"

She shrugs, then says the truth. "For saving my life. For this." She glances down between them. "You didn't have to, but it was more than appreciated."

Robin pulls back, settles on his side next to her, a hand still linked with hers while the other draws circles around her belly button, triggering goosebumps over her skin.

"Maybe I also wanted to." Regina wants to reply, but he doesn't let her, "I meant it when I told you I wanted to be here for you. I feel honored that you confessed so much to me, and that I was able to help. Trust me, your secrets are safe, I won't say a word to anyone."

"I know," she says softly, because she does, she trusts him.

But the sudden quietness reminds her of her stomach, rumbling loudly, so she sits up and looks around, noticing Robin mirroring her in confusion.

"What are you looking for?"

"Do you happen to have some food somewhere? I'm starving."

Her answer coxes a chuckle out of him, and she likes this sound, this casualness that has settled between them, as if they had always known each other. She watches him get up and put his pants on.

"Of course. Give me a second."

The food is deposited on one side of the bed, Robin taking place in his chair, Regina staying on the mattress, and is shared in a comfortable silence as they recover from the last days and more recent events.

"You know," She looks up at Robin when he begins to speak, "given everything that you confessed to me, if you're interested, I was thinking that maybe, one day, I could share my own experience with this disease with you." He looks sheepish, unwilling to overstepped, and Regina can't help a smile at how cute his attention is. "Maybe accompanied by a proper dinner, one not made out of cold food?" They share a chuckle at that. "If you're up for it, that is. I don't want to intrude."

How can she say no to that? How can she refuse him anything, after everything he did for her? And truth be told, even if she's not ready to admit it, she already longs to spend more time in his company, this time free of any life-threatening situation. So she nods with a smile, chewing and swallowing her food before replying.

"I'd like that. I figure it wasn't easy for you to help me, it must have brought back some memories."

"A little," Robin admits. "But I was too focused on taking care of you. You were in a pretty bad state."

Regina looks down at her food. She was. "I know." Wiping the corner of her mouth with a small handkerchief, she excuses herself. The memories of her nightmares are still fresh in her mind, and she suddenly feels the urgent need to rid herself of them, and of that sick state she's been in for days, so she replies. "I'm sorry, I'm going to leave you for a moment, I need to use the bathroom next door."

"Of course! Go ahead, I'll clean this up!"

Regina disappears behind the door, and closes her eyes. Can she dare hope for a better life now? A life with him, maybe?

She feels herself blushing for daring to have the thought, but Robin's behavior was clear. He didn't have sex with her to fulfill a primary or curious need.

No.

He wanted her, and no one else. And that, is something she's never felt before.

xxx

Regina exits the bathroom, feeling fresh and invigorated, some of her tiredness having subsided. She put on a light dress, thinking that Robin might prefer to see the real her, rather than the mask she puts on in front of the crowd. After all, he's seen her at her weakest, she has nothing to hide from him anymore.

Her eyes land on him, and she smiles. He's fallen asleep on his seat, and the sight is just adorable. She silently walks closer, realizes that he's cleaned the bed and placed the dishes on the ground next to his armchair. She uses that time to observe him, finally being the one watching and not being watched. It's nice for a change. It's her turn to let her eyes roam over his body, enjoying the sight, his strong biceps, torso, beautiful face. She can say it now, admit what she's denied for months: He's a beautiful man. Quite to her liking, actually.

She notices something on her wrist, and she moves closer, crouching and refraining a chuckle at how childish she is, but well, Robin makes her feel giddy, and no one is here to see her.

She carefully pulls on his wrist, biting her lower lip in curiosity, glancing at him regularly to make sure he's not waking up.

And freezes.

No!

It can't be!

Regina looks up at his face, mouth agape, not believing what's right in front of her, almost falling backwards.

The tattoo... The one Tinkerbell showed her decades ago. Her soulmate.

After all these years, after forgetting about his very existence, she finds herself facing one of the decisions that could have changed everything decades ago.

And she smiles.

She had pictured her soulmate in many versions, but never did she imagined he'd be someone like him. A kind, handsome man, caring father, with a hand on his heart. Someone who could treat her like a queen.

Regina's smile falls.

A Queen.

She is a Queen. A horrible one. Hated by her entire kingdom.

She looks down, and sighs.

It was too good to be true. She should have known it was.

Their connection comes from a magic so old and powerful, that no one and nothing can break it. If she lets him in, she knows their love will be stronger than anything else. Truth be told, she's yearning to taste what such love could be like, to have more of what she discovered today. Years ago, she was afraid by such love, because she didn't want to suffer. But today… Today she's not afraid… for her. But she is afraid, for Robin.

Being friends with her is something. Being her soulmate is another thing entirely. She can't let him suffer the judgments and looks of people around them. She can't let him bear the brunt of her mistakes. Henry is her son, there's no changing that, yet he was ripped away from her the second her mask fell. What will happen if she lets her relationship with Robin blossom?

No.

She can't put him through that. He's a good man, he deserves better than her. If Robin doesn't know about who they are supposed to be for each other, if she gives him every reason to hate her, then maybe he will decide to stay at bay. And that way he won't be exposed to people's mockery and judgment.

Oh, she knows what he would say! He would defend her for sure, tell her he doesn't care about what people might think or say.

But she knows what it feels like, to be on the receiving end of critics and attacks. Also, he has a son who needs his father and a stable environment, and not to suffer constant judgments. He shouldn't be put in the middle of that either.

Regina looks down, lets out a deep sigh. She got attached to Robin over the last days, more than she thought she would. Now she knows why. And if there's one thing she's sure of, is that she is ready to suffer, if it means that his life is good.

So she sends one last glance in his direction, wiping the tear that has fallen down her cheek, hating herself for what she's about to do, and starts setting everything up.

xxx

"Come on! Wake up!"

Robin sighs and moves, but doesn't awake.

"Don't force me to throw a bowl of water at your face. Wake up, thief!"

Regina struggles to keep her voice sturdy and clear, to be back to her former self, to put the mask back on and do what's best for others and not for her.

When he finally opens his eyes, startled and blinking against the light of day, she says with faked annoyance. "Finally! I thought you were going to spend one more day in this chair."

She knows the exact moment he sees her, because his eyes widen, and he frowns, clearly confused about why she's dressed in one of her dark outfits, looking more like the Evil Queen than the Regina he spent the last days with.

"What… What am I…"

"You were asleep when I woke up," she cuts him off harshly.

"I must have fallen back asleep when you went to the bathroom. I'm sorry, I-"

"The bathroom?" She questions, faking confusion and watching him frown as he must not understand what's going on.

Perfect. The less he understands, the better. The sooner he leaves this room, the better she will feel.

"Yes, after we had dinner. You told me you needed to use the bathroom, and I cleaned up the food before-"

He stops, looking around as he speaks, and Regina blesses herself for thinking of making a change in the plates, magically sending his to the kitchen and placing hers on the table.

She shakes her head. "You're not making any sense. Last time we spoke was when I was still sick. When I woke up for good, you were totally passed out on my armchair."

"But…" Robin gets up, scratches the back of his head. "No. I was here when you woke up. We talked a little, and then…" Regina wonders if he'll dare tell her now that she's back to her regal self, has prepared an entire speech to shut him up, but instead he finishes by. "We shared a dinner."

"You must have dreamt it," she dismisses with a wave of her hand, turning away.

"Regina-"

"Don't you dare call me by my name again, thief!" She thunders, so loud and clear he takes a step back, which breaks her heart. But it's for his own good, she keeps telling herself. He'll be far better off if he doesn't know the truth. "It's Your Majesty!" She clears. "Now, if you'd like to leave me alone. I have to clean all this mess."

The disappointment is obvious when Robin says. "You know, my offer still stands."

"You're still here?" She replies, huffing out in annoyance, glad to have her back on him, so he can't see the tears in her eyes.

"Yes. Until I receive an answer."

"An answer to what?"

"Are you still interested in my offer?"

She blinks back, then turns to look at him over her shoulder. "What offer?"

"You accepted to share dinner with me, one where I would tell you how I survived the disease when I was sick."

"Why would I accept to have dinner with you? And why in hell would I be interested in hearing your story?"

He walks closer, bolder than she anticipated, and without a warning his fingers close over hers, gentle, startling Regina, who doesn't have time to pull back.

"Because I may have dreamt of you waking up from this illness, but before that, when you confessed your deepest fears, we shared a closeness that I am certain, you never experienced with anyone else. And I know that, despite all your pretense, you need to feel that someone can be here for you."

"I'm perfectly fine by myself," she argues, swallowing down the lump in her throat.

Robin whispers next to her ear, sending a shiver down her spine and triggering butterflies in her belly. "Then why are you the one holding my hand now?"

Regina almost jumps back when she realizes her mistake, as if burned, caught up and not knowing how to defend herself this time.

"I wasn't-"

"Of course not," Robin cuts her with annoyance and disappointment, but unlike hers, his isn't faked. "I'm going to leave you now. I'm relieved to see you well and back to your old self. Have a nice day, Your Majesty!"

When Robin has exited the room, Regina walks to the door, places her hand against the frame. She closes her eyes, feeling her heart explode in her chest when she realizes that this was the point of no return. She doesn't fight the tears invading her eyes and sobs, lets herself crumble on the ground, grieving a friendship and love that she has put so much effort into destroying, before they could ever be.