AN; This will be a story set in Order of the Phoenix featuring Daphne Greengrass. Finally tired of Umbridge, or as she calls her, Umbitch, Daphne decides to take a page from Fred and George; she pranks Umbridge. Relentlessly. Repeatedly. Mercilessly. She pranks are meant to be funny, but there will be a plot. Consider an unfeatured story that runs parallel to the cannon plot. Eventual DaphneXGeorge, pairing (Aka Daphne has a crush, George is more of a slow-burn)

Chatter. So much of it. Way too much. It didn't help that it was Malfoy speaking. My father this and my father that. Daphne put her arms on the table, avoiding the food, and her head in between her hands. She used to enjoy Malfoy's company since they both liked quidditch.

Nowadays, she has no choice but to be in his company. Slytherin was isolated from the other houses, and she could see the looks everyone threw at them. Dark looks, accusing them all of being Umbitch fans. Daphne couldn't blame them; a loud amount of the Slytherins were, and a silent majority was not. She herself was among that silent majority. The one that did not dare to speak up incase they would be isolated from their only remaining friends in Slytherin, after all any friends they had had in the other houses were gone.

Daphne wished she could break that isolation.

But how? There was Potter, Potter with is stupid scar and his stupid broomstick, like Malfoy always went on about him, whose mere existence was an opposition to Umbitch. Granger with her Ravenclaw intellect, and Weasley with his kindness. Weasley. Just like his two brothers, Fred and George. Daphne adored their pranks, and their beater style in quidditch. She wished she could play against them, but Umbitch had banned all the clubs, including quidditch. She glanced over at the Gryffindor table. They looked happy, despite what Umbitch had done, and Fred and George seemed to be the main reason for that. She wished she could be like them. Maybe she could. An idea sprang to mind as quickly as she sprung to her feet.

"Daphne, what are you doing?" Malfoy squeaked. "Wait where are you going?"

He spoke to Daphne's back. She threw a nonsensical answer over her shoulder and headed for the second floor. Following the tapestries she looked for the one with a unicorn in a ring on it. There. She moved the tapestry, and sneaked up the stairs hidden behind it, all the way up to the windowsill. She sat on the windowsill, looked out through the window showing the clock-yard. With a pensive look, she took out a black notebook from her bag and opened a fresh page. This was it.

With a decisive hand she wrote "How to get rid of a pink toad".

Step 1; If she can't be like you, make her cooler

Daphne put up her hair in a ponytail. Sitting on the windowsill she got to work. This had to be perfect.

Next morning Daphne snuck out from her dorms early and went to the owlery. She had a letter to deliver. The autumn wind didn't faze her when it tangled her cloak with her legs, it didn't either when it decided to straight up smack a brown leaf in her face. Well, perhaps a bit. A tiny bit. She trotted up the dirt path to the owlery with excitement tingling in the fingers holding the letter. Entering the owlery she saw the usual floor; straw, owl droppings and skulls of mice. Fantastic. Avoiding the various offensive articles on the floor she headed for a nondescript school owl and gave it a thick, pink envelope. Grinning from cheek to cheek and humming she skipped her way down the stairs. Daphne hoped Umbitch liked mail as much as she did.

The hooting of the owls in the great hall signalled time to finish up breakfast. Well, that and mail. Crab shoved his 4th piece of toast into his mouth, and Draco shuddered slightly at the sight of it. Daphne would have too if she hadn't been too busy between poking her oatmeal and looking up at the teachers table to notice.

A school owl swopped toward the teachers table and landed in front of the pink ball of sunshine we all know. Said sunshine harshly shoved the owl away, and without a thank you sent it on its way. Too bad she didn't lose a finger, or two. Pleased with having received a pink letter, specially addressed to her, Umbitch, smirked toward her colleagues, Snape and McGonagall, in a self satisfactory manner. " Must be a parent satisfied with my teaching" she positively gloated." it is after all time for some hard measures"

Do the faces of the good teachers have to be described? No? Then let's continue the story.

Umbitch's nails forced open the envelope, only for it to in a loud pop transform into a small paper whale. Wonderful magic. Now many had turned their eyes to the teachers' table. Curious, Umbitch poked it, only for the whale to launch(in italics) a giant amount of ice-cold water on her.

At first Umbitch wore a face of confusion, mouth wide open, but it was soon replaced by one of betrayal, and with the students' laughter, transformed into one of fury. Dripping and soaked by ice cold water she rapidly stood up.

" Cease your laughter immediately" She screeched. "NOW!"

The screeching had the opposite effects; Daphne only laughed louder, and so did the rest of the hall. Gryffindors. Slytherins. Hufflepuffs. Ravenclaws. Daphne would later think back to this moment of united laughter which had made her cheeks hurt from smiling.

"Now Dolores, cool down a bit" Dumbledore softly spoke. " There is no reason for anger"

The pink toad looked ready to throw a fit right then and there.

" WHAT DO YOU MEAN-", calming herself down, Dolores realized how unbecoming it was to scream for a undersecretary of the ministry of magic so she took a deep breath and continued in a singsong voice that could have been used on an unruly three year old " There is of course reason for anger, and an investigation Dumbledore, after all an official from the ministry of magic has been attacked"

With twinkling eyes the headmaster responded, " There is not. There was no intentional attack, the whale simply like in its natural state, sprouted water from its hole. Fantastic miniature I must say. It can not be helped that you provoked it"

Lost for words Umbitch opened and closed her mouth. Then she stomped out of the dinner hall, almost cracking the tiles in her anger. When the heavy, and not so soundproof doors closed behind her laughter erupted again. The prankster could hear praise from both her and the other houses such as "good one", " I wish I had thought of that", " Did you see her face!".

Daphne smiling finished her oatmeal with great appetite.

Later in the evening Daphne found her way back to her sanctuary; her hidden windowsill. Sitting down she took out her black notebook, opened it, and checked off step one. With a smile she drew a little whale on the page. She then drew some random scribbles and patterns until she decided what step two would be. She started to write; Step two; Give her

Her writing was interrupted by some footsteps echoing from the top of the stairs. Throwing a glance at the clock outside she saw it was past curfew, and time to make a run for it before Filch caught her. Practically leaping down the stairs she made her escape just in time past the tapestry before the steps caught up to her.

The notebook remained behind.