Hello my Loves, Wow sorry it has been a hot minute, but life got extremely crazy and I was just unable to write. I am back though and plan to continue this story. Thank you all so much for the kind words and although the chapters will be posted a little more spread out then they have before I promise you will not be disappointed. This Chapter is a little on the short side, but I wanted to get something up. So I hope you enjoy!

As fall turned to winter Will became more and more quiet. I knew that he would start to shut down, not being able to go out as often and being stuck in the annex all day, but I didn't think it would get as bad as it did. I never knew where Will went in his mind those days I just knew that it was probably somewhere dark, like before his accident.

It was about one in the morning when I woke up to Will screaming and panicking. I got up as fast as I could to wake him up and try to calm him down. His eyes darted around the room and them landed on mine and a hint of a smile played at his lips. It quickly disappeared as tears started to roll down his face.

¨Please leave me alone Lou¨ he said as I wiped some of his tears with the pad of my thumb away.

¨I'm not going anywhere Will, I made that promise to you.¨

We sat there for sometime him quietly sobbing and me holding his hand trying to tell him desperately how loved he was. Oh but he was so loved. WIll turned his head the most he could turn it and at that moment I knew exactly what he was about to say.

¨It happened two years ago today. I didn't wake up and say that that was the day I was going to kill myself but the opportunity just happened.¨ He said this trying so hard to forget everything.

¨Will you don't have to tell me if you're not ready.¨

¨To be honest I don't think I will ever be ready Lou, but if I want you in my life than I can't keep hiding you from my past.¨

At those words I broke, the wanting to know about the scars on his wrist and the sleepless nights playing out in my head what was going through his head. It all came out like a waterfall, at that moment I didn't want to know, but I also knew that him telling me this was his way of fully letting me love him and being part of his life.

¨Lou, please don't cry¨

I sat up on my elbows and tried to compose myself the best I could. With that Will continued.

¨At that time Nathan was my only career, he would come at certain time of the day and would leave me to do whatever I wanted or could do which was not much may I remind you. I had just finished watching a movie and decided I had enough of that little room. I went to the kitchen and as I rounded the corner of my room I hit my wrist on a wooden rod hanging from the ceiling from construction of the annex that was not completely finished.¨

At that point both Will and I had tears down our faces. All I wanted to do was hold him and tell him it would be fine and he was not alone.

¨I didn't realize I had cut myself on a nail until I looked down at my arm because it had fallen off the armrest of my chair. All I saw was blood and I knew that that was my chance to end it all and not have to wait 6 months.¨ He said trying to calm down. ¨I was very close to ending it when my Dad and Georgina walked in and asked to see if I wanted to go on a walk with them. The next thing I remember is waking up in hospital about a week later with my parents by my side crying and telling me that I had lost almost half of my blood.¨

I didn't know what to say or even think Will would have been dead so many times that my laying next to him was almost a miracle, so I said the only thing I could think to say, ¨I Love You Will.¨

The rest of the day we spent hanging out and watching movies, both his Mom and Dad popped in every hour to check on how he was doing but never stayed long enough to reminisce about what happened years ago. It started snowing in the late afternoon and Nathan was unable to make it which for me was fine it just meant I had a little more extra time with Will. I lay by his side after getting him ready and just looked at him. I didn't know if he was a sleep or not, but I watched him and all I could do was smile.

Just six months ago I thought I was going to lose him but here he is. A year ago he almost took his life, but then again here he is, and his last bought with pneumonia the doctor told his parents multiple times to say their goodbyes and that he was not going to make it through the night, but for some reason he did and here he was. I was suppose to lose him so many times, but something in him whether it be some super natural force or someone greater than us wanted him to stay.

¨Are you just staring at me sleep Clark?¨ Will said taking me aback for a second. ¨I was just thinking¨ I said unable to hide my smile. ¨That's never a good thing¨ Will said playfully. ¨What were you thinking about?¨ he asked, curiosity getting the best of him. ¨Just about how far we have come and what our future has in store for us.¨ ¨And what does our future have in store for us?" Will asked "Oh I don't know, maybe a happy little family with a dog living in a nice little house with family who visits everyone in a while and a yard that has a huge garden, and a window above the kitchen sink where you can see the castle and the as far as the eye can see."

Will went silent and his brows furrowed. "Well I think you may want to find someone else who can give you all this"

"What"

"Lou we have talked about this many times I can not give you that family, I can't even take you to bed. Do you know what I want to do with you?"

"Will, never ever say that again, You are the best thing that ever happened to me and I don't care if I can have a family or not. As long as I'm with you then I am fine. I don't need all those things all I need is for you to be with me."

"I love you Lou."

"I love you too, more than you will ever know."