A/N: Hey folks! Agh! I'm sorry for the late update. Crap, now I don't even know if I still have readers in this fandom. Short story short, I finished my second year of Uni, and because of my good grades, my Mom signed me up for a bunch of writing competitions. Surprise! (I'm 19, why you gotta be so patronizing mother? But thank you ^.^). Yup, that's where all my time has been devoted to. I didn't have any pre-written chapters, welp. I'm also writing my own book this summer, but hey! Let's focus on this story. It hasn't gone MIA just yet!

Thanks a bunch to those who have supported this fic. And to the anon who asked, glitter and rainbows tastes like maple syrup mixed with bacon. Hmmm. I may or may not have just had breakfast. Feel free to pester me into updating faster (some of you have already done so on PM lmao). I have many ongoing writing projects and I have the attention span of an ADHD fruitfly on copious amounts of caffeine. I really would like to get back into a regular schedule...

Anyways, enjoy the chapter and have a great day/ night (or don't...I can't tell thou what to do) :)

I wasn't having a good day today. Sometimes, your anxiety just has a field day and decides to make everything harder for you. I felt like I was drowning, despite the smile that I had to force on my face in front of customers. I wanted to be alone, to have some space to breathe. Unfortunately, business was booming at the café, especially since it was the middle of December. People came from all over to taste Viktor's specialty daily flavors, while others just wanted an excuse to get drunk in the middle of the afternoon. Heck, I had served 40 vodka hot chocolates in a little over an hour!

Another thing about anxiety is that it's irrational. Your worst critic is yourself. You feel like you're failing everyone, but your anxiousness amplifies it to the point where you doubt yourself and just want to give up. I say 'sorry' to overcompensate for my lack of self-esteem. You would think that losing weight would make me feel better about myself, – which it shouldn't, just to be clear- but I've always looked at my faults from an inwards perspective.

I was awkward; forgetful; selfish at times; liked my privacy to the point where I isolated myself; I never kept in touch with those close to me unless they were the ones to reach out first; I had very little friends, and for a good reason; I lacked confidence in myself and my abilities; I snapped at people when they got too close…need I go on?

The holidays are inevitably going to be a stressful time. For myself, it's because my family expects me to come home. Every year, I've managed to come up with a lame excuse of why I had to stay here in Detroit. Sooner or later, the excuses were going to run out. Not to mention that even though I now had someone to spend the holidays with, my family didn't even know about him. It's not like I was afraid to tell them about my love life. It's just, the thought of calling them terrified me. I was always hyperaware of every possible chance of rejection in my life. What would they say when they found out that I wasn't planning on going back to University just yet? Or that I was 'dating' a man? It was these 'what ifs' that made me avoid them almost entirely. Texting was easier; I'm sure that they would understand. At least I hope?

Skating around the café with so many thoughts running through my mind could only end in disaster. Yuri and I were the only servers today, as we hadn't been expecting such a rush this early in the afternoon. I had a headache, and was running a low fever when I had come into work today. Of course, I didn't tell Viktor about the fever, otherwise I would have been lying in bed at home. I needed this money to pay the rent, even if I had Phichit to share the bills with now.

I had hardly seen Viktor all day because of how busy the café was. My mind was a jumbled mess. Orders went in one ear and out the other. I was having a hard time keeping up with my bill pad, flipping back and forth frantically to remember who ordered what. The worst was when people kept adding to their orders. I tended to black out when I became nervous and anxious, and it was really starting to show with how many orders I've gotten wrong.

I skated back to the front counter, my heart hammering. The sounds of laughter and glasses clinking against each other blurred in the background. The café looked beautiful with all the Christmas lights hung up on the windows; they complemented the devil-red venue of the place. As people became more drunk, however, red was something that I hoped to avoid. Tipsy customers were easily agitated, especially when service was slow. I've already cut off several people; a red face was the tell-tale sign to ease them off from any further alcohol.

I had just put my hands on the front counter, hoping to catch my breath, when Yakov snapped at me from the other end of the room. "Yuuri! This is no time to be a lazy slug! Get those orders out before I start taking from your tips! We can't afford useless employees."

I wiped off the sweat from my brow. "Yes, sir! Sorry about that!" I squeaked, swallowing heavily. Yakov was also more stressed than usual. Apparently, his ex-wife was visiting from Russia; she was to begin training Yuri for the following figure skating season in preparation for his senior début. Unfortunately, this meant that the old man's stress was projected onto us employees, and boy was he ever nasty when he wanted to be.

My face felt warm, and my ears buzzed. I was dissociating due to the stress, but there wasn't much that I could do about it. I felt numb, as if I was floating and nothing was real. This might have explained why I didn't see Yuri coming out of the kitchen until the very last-minute.

"Watch it, pork chops!" Yuri growled, swerving out of the way with a platter of sandwiches in his right hand. "Table 3-6 are still waiting for their alcohol orders!"

"Christ! I'm sorry!" I apologized. "I totally forgot." I had nearly double the customers as Yuri, since he was too young to serve alcohol. It made everything much more complicated, as we had to split the charges into separate alcohol and food bills.

Yuri rolled his eyes before skating off in a rush. "Keh, of course you did. Dumb Piggie," he muttered.

"I'm sorry," I whispered to no one in particular.

I numbly skated into the kitchen, grabbing the next three orders that Chris had already plated for me. I then hurried off towards Sara's table, thankful that they were one of the few customers who had the decency to be polite and patient- save for Michele.

"Chocolate Cranberry Cake, and Espresso Shots?" I reaffirmed.

Sara shook her head, giving me a pitiful glance. "We ordered the Caramel Toffee Cake with white hot chocolates," she answered.

"Oh," I blushed. "I'm s-sorry, I'll be right back with your actual order."

Emil waved his hand. "Don't worry, it's fine, bro!" he smiled. "We all love chocolate cake too, isn't that right Michele?" he asked, turning to a sour-looking Michele.

"Si, but that's not what we ordered," Michele snapped, crossing his arms.

"Quit being so rude, Mickey," Leo sighed. "Can't you see that it's crazy busy in here? Give him a break."

"Yeah," Guang Hong added. "Chocolate cake was my first choice anyways."

Under the pressure of Sara's glare, and Emil's unwanted arm, Michele caved. "Fine," he assented. "We'll have what you brought us instead."

"No really, it's fine!" I croaked.

"Yuuri," Sara reached over to touch my forearm. "It's all right. Go finish up with the rest of your orders. Hey, if you're fast enough, we might even save you a piece," she winked.

"T-thank you," I stammered, smiling at the group before skating away. When I turned my back to them, I caved, feeling ashamed all over again. I was grateful that they had taken pity on me, but was equally embarrassed by how badly I was doing my job.

YIP!

Makkachin whined when I skated over the tip of his tail. "Gosh! Makka, I'm so sorry!" I wailed. The doge stood up and trotted away, tail hidden between his legs. Great. Could this shift get any worse?

I spoke too soon.

I jumped when Yuri slapped me on the shoulder. "Where are those orders I asked you to get?" he yelled, standing on his tippy toes to press his face near mine. "Are you a fucking amnesiac or something?!"

"No, I-I…" I faltered, choking on the large amount of spittle forming in my mouth. I couldn't swallow down or suppress my nerves anymore; it was beginning to become too much.

Yuri's expression softened. "Jesus, fuck. Relax. I'll get the alcohol for you, just don't tell anyone my age if they ask," he grunted, skating past me towards the bar station.

"Hey, Piggie?" Yuri asked, looking over his shoulder.

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry for…yelling at you. It wasn't very cool of me. Let's just work through this together, da?"

I nodded my head and mustered a weak smile. "Okay."

"And one more thing," Yuri blushed slightly. "Try not to be too hard on yourself. We're all making mistakes. It's bound to happen to everyone."

"Thanks, Yuri," I murmured, genuinely touched by his words.

"Heh?! I'm not looking for your angsty gratitude! Just do your fucking job and get on with it already!"

"Yes, boss," I giggled breathlessly as Yuri skated/ twitched away.

This small bubble of happiness broke when I realized that I had two other messed up orders to correct.

I skated into the kitchen again, avoiding Chris's concerned look. Viktor was helping him out in the kitchen by doing the dishes. Mostly, Viktor was taste tasting, but he's the boss, so there was no point in calling him out for his silliness.

"What's going on, dear?" Chris asked me, putting down his rolling-pin. "Your face is unusually red."

"Oh, well, um," I looked down at the ground. "I got another two orders wrong."

Chris groaned.

"I'm sorry!" I cried out. "Christ, I'm sorry! Listen, you can take them out of my paycheck! I accept full responsibility!"

Viktor put down the platter he was washing, grabbing a washcloth to dry his hands with. "Yuuri?" he questioned. "Sunshine? Are you all right?"

"I'm fine!" I blurted out, blushing furiously. I wasn't sure if was from the overexertion, my fever, my feelings for Viktor, or a combination of all three.

"No worries, darling," Chris chided, despite looking stressed himself. "Just calm down. You're making my blood pressure rise just by looking at the nervous state you're in. We'll fix the orders; it's not that big of a deal."

I let myself breathe, feeling much of the weight on my shoulders disappear. The employees here were surprisingly understanding; it was like we were a small, close-knit family. "I'm sorry, it won't happen again."

"Apologize one more time, and I just might get diabetes from that helpless look on your face," Chris chuckled, going back to the pastry he was working on. "Mon dieu, Yuuri. Look at all these health problems you're causing me!"

I chuckled weakly, rubbing a hand against the back of my neck.

Viktor walked up to me, placing a hand on my forehead. "Aha!" he exclaimed. "I knew you looked pale this morning. You have a fever, don't you?"

"Maybe a small one," I murmured meekly, speaking through pursed lips.

Viktor raked his hand through my hair. "Tsk! Tsk! I'm taking you back to my apartment. I have just the thing to cure you."

"What?! No! I can't just leave Yurio on his own?!" I protested.

Viktor pecked my forehead, causing it to burn much warmer than before. "I called in Minami. He was more than happy to take his 'senpai's' place."

"Wait, so you've been planning this from the start?" I grumbled into Viktor's chest, refusing to look up at him.

"Da, obviously," Viktor sassed, wrapping his arms around my waist. Chris let out an appreciative whistle in the background, making me blush even harder. "Now grab your coat."

"W-wait," I stuttered. "We're going to your apartment?"

"Mhmmm. Why, does my Sunshine not like that idea?" Viktor pouted.

I fidgeted with my hands. "No, no it's fine, I guess. I just feel bad for being so useless here today."

Viktor cupped my face with both hands, his blue eyes kind with affection. "We're leaving in five minutes. That's not me ordering you as your boyfriend. I'm your boss right now and I can't let my minions, ahem, employees work themselves to illness."

I felt my heart skip a beat. "Did you just call me…your boyfriend?"

It took him three weeks…

Chris squealed; I thanked every God imaginable that Minako wasn't here to witness this.

It was now Viktor's turn to blush.

I'm pretty sure that I saw Chris pull out his phone to snapchat a picture of Viktor's flustered expression.

"Da, I suppose I just did. I better act like it then, huh?" Viktor mused.

I gave Viktor a questioning look.

"Viktor?!"

My confusion didn't last long. Viktor hoisted me up by the waist and threw me over his shoulders. "Take a gander at this beautiful specimen, for he shall never be seen again. Well, until tomorrow anyways…"

Viktor pushed open the kitchen doors, grinning from ear to ear. "I'm off to my castle to heal his ill thoughts!"

Chris waved us off. "You two are literally the cutest thing ever. Makes me wonder if I should be urging my boyfriend to do dorky things like this."

I pounded a weak fist against a cackling Viktor's back. "You can put me down now. My dignity has suffered enough today, don't you think?"

Viktor pouted but did as I asked.

The pout on his face didn't go away until I relented and let him hold my hand.

…

As opposed to driving to Viktor's apartment, like any sensible people would, Viktor wanted us to take a walk. He lived downtown in a rich sector not too far from the café, but it was beyond freezing out, and any amount of time spent outside was already too much. Usually, Viktor picked me up in the mornings and we carpooled to work together; he refused to let me take any form of public transportation, even if it meant him waking up earlier and going out of his way to give me a lift. He really was changing before my eyes. The old Viktor I knew -if I even truly knew him back then- would have made a grand spectacle about doing favours for me, expecting something in return. Now, Viktor did things for me without my asking, and myself likewise. All my time spent with him was pleasant.

The walk to his apartment took me back to when we used to go for morning runs. It was nice, holding hands with him. We didn't have to speak much, as being with each other was more than enough. It wasn't long before we entered his fancy condo building, taking the elevator all the way up to the penthouse at the top.

Viktor swung open his apartment door, gesturing for me to enter first. I scoffed when he gave me a small bow as well, his grey scarf nearly touching the floor. "Boyfriends first," he sang, grinning as if he was beginning to appreciate the title he had given to me the more he said it.

"Wow," was all I could say as I entered the spacious flat. It was my first time coming here. Most of our time together was either spent at the café or back at my apartment. We've always talked about me coming here, but work always seemed to get in the way.

Viktor smirked, pleased at my dumbfounded reaction. Makkachin nudged my knee cap with his snout before scrambling inside to appreciate the warmth of the cozy space.

It was two stories tall with several wide windows. The tall curtains were drawn open to let the late afternoon light pour through. I could see the downtown area being peppered with snowfall, the rooftops of the buildings appearing flat and inferior from the height we were located at. There was a kitchen and island bar to the right with fancy leather stools and every kitchen appliance that you could think of. I had to scoff at this, knowing how Viktor didn't care to cook outside of the café. The living room was at the center of the room, which entailed a ring of black leather couches, a flat screen TV and a sleek glass coffee table. At the left of the living room, there was a metal spiral staircase that led to the second floor. I was in complete awe at how nice, and yet homey this apartment felt. It smelled exactly like Viktor; a sweet scent that wasn't too strong, but you knew that it was there to comfort you.

I let Viktor take my coat and scarf off. As he hung them up on a nearby coat rack, I shuffled out of my shoes and stepped into the living room. The simple pair of jeans and cotton long-sleeved shirt that I was wearing made me feel cheap in comparison. Everything that Viktor owned was elegant and tasteful.

"So," I sighed. "What's your master plan? How are you going to 'heal' me from this fever?"

Viktor squeezed my shoulders, walking past me and into the kitchen. "It wasn't your fever that I was worried about most. I could tell you were feeling anxious and thought that you needed some time to get away from it all."

Viktor stepped back to press his hand against my forehead. "In fact, your fever's already gone down. The walk outside must have helped. Please make yourself at home in the living rom. I'll be right back with some warm drinks."

I blushed slightly when Viktor pecked my cheek.

I then trudged into the living room, joining Makkachin on the couch. Said doge barked, nudging the wool blanket hanging over the couch with his snout. I took the hint and wrapped the blanket around my torso, letting Makkachin rest his head on my lap. I absently scratched his ears until Viktor came back with two steaming mugs of hot chocolate.

Viktor sat down on the couch, lifting the blanket so that we were both covered. He let my head rest against his chest. We slowly sipped our drinks; I held his hand, while he had his right arm wrapped around me. A good amount of time passed before he finally broke our silence.

"What's been bothering my Sunshine today?" he asked. "How can I help?"

I felt my stomach churn uncomfortably. What did I ever do to deserve him? Here I was, letting him baby and pamper me, and yet I still couldn't bring myself to believe that he truly wanted me. I couldn't help but feel insecure.

Weak and Useless…

"I'm just anxious," I whispered. "There's nothing much you can do about it."

Viktor sighed. "Yuuri, please speak to me. I've sweetened you with treats, so why won't you open up to me?" he just about whined.

Deep down behind the egotism of that statement, I knew that Viktor was worried about me.

"Well," I hummed, taking a shaky breath. "The holidays are always stressful... My family wants me to visit, but I don't think I can bring myself to face them until I figure out what I want to do with my life. But sometimes, I'm just…I'm anxious and I don't know why."

Viktor nodded his head. "I'm sure your family will understand. I'm sorry, but I'm not sure how to make you feel better. What do you usually do when you're feeling anxious? More importantly, what can I do?"

I chuckled weakly. "You're doing everything right, big guy. My anxiety almost never has a good reason. All I need is someone to be there for me; no questions; little talking; just presence. I can't prevent my mood on some days, but that doesn't mean I don't have my good days either. Today's a bad day, and I just have to deal with it."

"Okay," Viktor murmured. "Then let's just sleep this bad day off. We'll deal with it together."

"Excuse me?" I asked, nearly choking on my hot chocolate.

Viktor took both of our hot chocolates and placed them on the coffee table. "Are you so overwhelmed by my casual handsomeness that you've gone deaf?" he grinned. "We're taking a nap. Being in the grasp of my wonderful arms, you'll be better in no time."

"And what about you?" I rolled my eyes. "How will you feel better? Oh, don't give me that look. I can see that you're worried about me."

Viktor shrugged. "I feel happy by making others happy. It's quite simple, really."

"That's a bit concerning," I mumbled, yawning. The sound of Makkachin's snores were putting me to sleep. "We'll talk about this later. I still haven't recovered from that fever yet. Besides, this couch is devilishly comfy," I teased.

Viktor pulled up the blanket over our shoulders, smirking. "Agreed."

…

I woke up with a start. Somehow a nap had turned into a full fourteen hours. My face burned with an intense blush as I realized the repercussions of my accidental sleepover. Oh God! How lame was it that I had slept over at Viktor's and we didn't even do anything?! I mean, it's not like I've ever done 'things' with a guy before, but with a stud like Viktor, surely he had expected more? Agh! My entire life was just so PG 13. It was almost pathetic. No, it was pathetic.

Makkachin whined, shuffling off my lap and settling down at my side. Using my newfound freedom, I reached over and grabbed my phone from the coffee table. I was quick to throw my phone away when I saw what Phichit had texted me:

So, you're sleeping over at Viktor's now, huh?

You sly pork cutlet, why didn't you tell me?!

Be safe ! I have a morning shift tomorrow but I want to hear EVERYTHING when I get back.

That is, if you even decide to come home…

Muahahahaha!

I scowled, standing up from the couch. Now I wasn't so sure if I even wanted to go home. Besides, it was Saturday; I didn't have work and the day was still young. But first, I had to get over the awkwardness of what had happened yesterday.

A crackle and sizzle off in the kitchen made me turn my head. Once I had spotted him, I couldn't look away. Viktor was wearing nothing but a pair of grey boxers and a pink cooking apron- which looked completely masculine on him; uh, not that people in a same-sex relationship had to conform to heteronormative standards! Viktor sure looked handsome, that's all. His skin was pale, and his muscles were lean; I was practically drooling at the sight of him.

And then those smirking blue eyes caught my gaze and I couldn't have been more flustered.

"Good morning, Sunshine~!" Viktor smiled. "What would you like for breakfast this morning?"

I could already smell French toast, bacon, pancakes and eggs. Looks like he was going for a traditional American breakfast. Not that you see me complaining! When he wasn't working at the café, all Viktor liked to do was lounge around and scroll through his social media. It was a miracle that he had even gotten up this early to do a favor for someone other than himself. The thought of this made me smile; he really did care about me.

But why?

I cautiously padded into the kitchen, my feet bare and cold against the marble tiling. The counter held several plates of food. Viktor was still working on the bacon, eggs, and French toast, while a stack of pancakes was laying off to the side on the island's tabletop.

Viktor gave me a wry glance. I couldn't look him in the eyes; my feet were apparently far more interesting to gaze at. "I'm, uh…sorry for troubling you last night," I whispered.

"And this morning. I was hoping that our first sleepover would have been a bit more…special…" I trailed off.

Viktor chuckled. "Silly, Yuuri. Special for me is spending time with you. Now come closer, I can feel your ogling eyes burning holes into my gloriously toned test," he teased.

I took a few hesitant steps forward.

"Come on," Viktor chided. "You know you want to touch it."

"Shut up," I blushed.

Viktor grabbed my hand, raising it to his chest. I inhaled sharply when I felt my fingers press against the tough sinew of his pectoral muscles. I swallowed, knowing that I was still in the process of toning my own muscles.

"So?" Viktor asked, batting his lashes. "How was it? Are you…feeling better from yesterday?"

I hid a wince. "Yeah, actually," I smiled, a genuine one too. "I'm a lot better now, thank you. I'll probably call my sister later today and let her know what's happening."

"Oh, and your chest is indeed glorious," I muttered through pursed lips, causing Viktor to give me a naughty look.

"You're too kind." Viktor kissed my forehead before using a fork to lift a strip of bacon from a pan on the oven top. "Lean bacon, for my now lean, Piggie," he mused.

I rolled my eyes, unamused by his joke, but still ate the bacon anyways. "Meanie," I scoffed.

Viktor bent down to bump noses before spinning me around and pressing me against the counter. I dug both palms into the edge of the counter, accidentally shoving Viktor's phone backwards.

I looked up at Viktor through lidded eyes, hoping that he would take the hint. Clearly he did, because the wolfish smirk on his face was soon replaced with want. He leant over to kiss me, running his tongue along my bottom lip. I opened my lip in compliance, letting him enter without much protest.

I ran my hand through Viktor's soft muss of gray hair, humming in content. "I'm feeling better," I murmured against his mouth. "But how about you? How have you been doing lately. I can't help but feel that this relationship is only about me."

I pulled away, pressing my lips against Viktor's throat.

"Forget about me," Viktor growled, grabbing my chin and tilting it up so he could capture my lips again. "I'm fine. I'm more worried about you."

An uncomfortable pang of guilt formed in my stomach. I decided to change the topic, but I still wanted to focus on him and him alone. He deserved to be pampered too. "You know, we never really did get to celebrate our birthdays," I chastised.

It had been too early in our relationship to do anything special for our birthdays. Even Christmas, which was only a few weeks away, would seem a bit odd to celebrate with him. We were still very early in our relationship, after all.

Viktor sighed. "Why would I want to celebrate getting old?"

"28 isn't old," I deadpanned, letting my head fall against his chest.

"Perhaps, but there's no point in celebrating when Christmas is around the corner~! And weren't you the one who told me not to bother getting you any presents?"

I looked up at Viktor, focusing on him in contemplation. The happy façade that he was putting on wasn't fooling me. Like Yuri had told me before, Viktor wasn't as content as he led others to think. I was beginning to believe this more and more. Any time I attempted to learn more about him, he responded by asking more questions about myself. There was one instance where he had truly opened up to me, and even then, we had only treaded upon shallow waters.

"Fine," I relented. "And don't put words in my mouth! I said not to spend too much money on me. You can just combine my Christmas and Birthday present into one."

Viktor pouted. "Sorry for wanting to spoil you…"

"There will be no spoiling of any kind unless it's mutual," I scolded.

"HELLO?!" an angry voice echoed, coming from Viktor's cellphone on the counter. "ARE YOU GUYS DONE MAKING OUT? WHY THE FUCK DID YOU EVEN CALL ME? ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE ME DEAF OR SOMETHING?"

I cupped a hand over my mouth and giggled. "Oops. Looks like I must have hit the speaker button by accident."

Viktor laughed, grabbing the cellphone. "Language, kitten!" he reproached.

While Viktor failed to calm down a furious Yurio, I watched silently, analyzing him; looking for any faults and cracks in his demeanor.

I concluded that he was acting strange. There was something that Viktor was either hiding, afraid of, or didn't want to talk me about.

And as his boyfriend, it was my job to find out what that was.