Author Note: The objective here is to fill in the blanks between the Logan we saw in Season 7 and the Logan we saw in the Revival. 1-2 events from each year that shape Logan into the man he becomes. Will continue into the Revival years.

If you've never read my stuff before, my Logan can be kind of insecure and self-loathing when he and Rory have problems. But still somehow charming! All of Logan' inner thoughts are in italics.

As always, all characters belong to Gilmore Girls, and title borrows from Friends.

May 2007

"Goodbye, Rory," Logan says, placing the ring box back in his pocket.

He turns and strides away from his one true love. His mind is somehow blank and panicked at the same time.

She said no.

How could she say no?

He gets into his Porsche and realizes he has no idea where to go. He had slept on Colin's couch last night, but all of his things are still in Rory and Paris's apartment.

I'll have to get everything out while they're at her graduation lunch.

He calls Colin.

"Hey man. Why aren't you busy celebrating?"

Logan sighs. "She said no. We broke up."

"What? Are you serious? What did she say?" Colin asks.

"I can't talk about it right now," Logan says. "I have to get in her apartment and get all my stuff. I know you're in the middle of finals, and law school is super hard, but can you come help me? All my crap won't fit in my car."

"Yeah, sure. Give me twenty minutes to get my study group out of here, and I'll meet you there," Colin responds.

"Thanks, Colin. I'm sorry." I'm sorry I'm such a pathetic mess.

"Don't worry about it."

He drives to Rory's apartment. He hikes up the stairs, turns all the locks, kicks the door, and heads inside, leaving the door ajar behind him for Colin.

There are boxes everywhere, some labeled, some not. He has no idea which are his.

How am I supposed to do this? How can I un-entwine our lives in an hour?

He starts opening boxes and pulling things aside when they are his. There are several that contain mixtures of his and Rory's belongings, and it almost pushes him to his breaking point.

He finds his Yale t-shirt that Rory likes to sleep in. He pulls it out and brings it to his face. It smells like her shampoo.

Tears start flowing, as he realizes he will probably never smell that shampoo again.

How could she say no? When she asked for time last night, I figured she just needed to make a pro/con list. I never thought it wouldn't come out in my favor.

He hears a knock at the door and quickly wipes his eyes in the t-shirt so Colin won't see him crying.

He is surprised when Christopher walks in.

"Logan. I… I didn't expect to find you here. I just ran up to get Rory's purse," Christopher says.

"Uh… I needed to get my stuff out of here before she comes back."

There is an awkward silence as they acknowledge the elephant in the room.

"Logan, I can't pretend to know why Rory made this decision. I know she loves you," Christopher says.

Logan snorts. "Just not as much as I love her. I guess I've known that for a while… I just never thought… it wasn't enough."

"Maybe this is for the best then."

I do not want this speech right now.

"So I should be grateful she just ripped my heart out?" Logan asks.

"No, but…" he trails off. "You know, I asked Lorelei to marry me at least a dozen times."

"Oh… So I should just wait twenty years until she says yes? Is that what you're telling me?"

"No," Christopher says. "I'm telling you that our divorce was finalized last week. When she said no, she had reasons, and she meant it. Maybe Rory does too. And at least now you can move on. Do a better job than I did. You're smart and talented. And young. Make your own life."

Logan sits down and puts his head in his hands. He contemplates these words.

"If it makes you feel any better, I'm up here because she's too devastated to get out of the car."

The thought of Rory crying does not give him any consolation. "It doesn't," Logan says.

"Um, have you seen her purse?" Christopher asks, looking around. "It's pink…"

"It's over there," Logan says, pointing to the Birkin.

Christopher walks over to get it, but Logan stops him.

"If she's really upset, that purse won't make her feel any better."

He goes through a few of Rory's boxes until he finds a smaller black purse. He pulls Rory's wallet, cell phone, chapstick, and a hair tie out of the Birkin and places them in the less offensive bag.

Handing it to Christopher, he says "This should be all she needs today... But please don't tell her I'm up here. I'll have everything out before she gets home."

Chris eyes him appreciatively and offers his hand. "I would have really liked having you as my son-in-law."

Logan's lips tighten and he shakes Chris's hand. And then he's gone.

Colin enters just after Christopher leaves. He walks in and hugs Logan.

I know he's a huge idiot, but he's always here when I need him.

Logan picks up a box, and Colin follows suit. After a few silent trips to Colin's Range Rover, Logan looks around the apartment. He knows he is leaving some things, but he can't bear to be here anymore. He gets in his car and follows Colin back to his place.

"Steph is driving up from the city. She'll be here by dinner," Colin says as they walk into his apartment.

"She doesn't have to do that," Logan protests.

"She wants to. Just let her."

As soon as they are inside, Colin pours two glasses of Wild Turkey, and Logan slams it back.

Why doesn't she want to be with me? Why is her career more important than me?

"I know you're in the middle of finals. I'm sorry I'm distracting you," Logan apologizes.

"It's no big deal," Colin says. "I only have one left. I'll just take one shot for every two you take."

"Actually… what are you holding? Then you won't have to babysit me." I'm an obnoxious drunk, but a mellow stoner.

Colin thinks for a minute. "I know I have weed, probably some ex. That may be it. I could get some coke pretty quickly if you wanted it."

"Nah, weed's good. Go back to studying." Logan opens the cabinet door under the coffee table where Colin keeps his stash. He begins methodically packing the bowl of Colin's bong. He pulls a couple of hits and leans back unto the couch.

How has this happened to me? How did I get so wrapped up in a woman that I can't find my way out?

Maybe the Huntzberger life is my destiny. I should go back to the company, sleep around until my mother makes me get married, and live in Hartford society.

I'll send my kids to private school in Switzerland so I never have to actually see them.

I'll jet set around the world to a different mistress in every city. I'll pay for their apartments, their diamonds, their abortions.

My wife and kids will hate me, but I'll be rich and powerful.

Goddamn, fucking shit.

I don't want that life.

I want Rory.

He pulls another hit off the bong and turns on the television. The Real World is on, and he watches aimlessly for a while.

These fucking clowns. I wish getting drunk and banging your hot roommate was the real world. The real world is getting dumped by the love of your life in front of her entire family. Who didn't like you much even before this debacle.

The real world is realizing you're a fucking Huntzberger, and all of it was decided the moment you were born anyway.

His cell phone rings, and he has a fleeting thought that maybe Rory's changed her mind. Christopher said she was upset.

He tries to get his drug-addled thoughts in order.

"Of course I still want to marry you. Of course I don't want to break up."

He grabs the phone and sees that it's actually Honor.

Fuck. I'm going to have to tell her.

"Hey," he answers as unenthusiastically as he can, praying that she'll pick up on it.

"Congratulations, baby brother! Can I talk to my future sister-in-law?" Honor gushes.

"Um, she said no, and we broke up, so she's not really here for you to talk to," Logan says.

"Oh my God! She said no? But you guys… are so in love. Why would she say no? I don't understand!"

"Honestly, I don't understand either," Logan says. "And I'm too high right now to analyze it. Can I call you later?"

He hangs up before she can answer and hits the bong again.

Rory's not changing her mind. She is ridiculously stubborn, and she has made her choice. She doesn't want me. She said no, and she had reasons.

He's not sure how long he sits there getting high, but he knows he is grateful to MTV and the way they marathon mindless television on the weekends.

Eventually Colin comes out of his room to sit beside him, and soon after that Stephanie enters the apartment.

"I brought dinner," she says, sounding quietly positive.

She's feeling out the situation. But I don't want her pity.

"Thanks. I'm starving," Logan says.

"I'll bet," she says, taking in the bong and the marijuana all over the table. "Have a burrito."

He unwraps it and digs in. The munchies are hitting him hard.

"I got some guacamole, too. I know how much you love it," she says, opening the container and placing it in front of him.

He stares at the offending condiment. It feels like the last straw; he can't take it anymore.

He leans back against the couch and replays the events of the day.

"How can I go to California without her? I can't live in that house and pick avocados when she's not there to share it with me. Fuck it. I've got to beg Mitchum to take me back. I'm going to have to fucking beg, and he is going to love every second of it. God... Fuck my life…

Why doesn't she want to marry me? I mean, I've screwed up some, but she has to know how hard I try to be good enough for her. Why am I not good enough for her? I'm never enough for anybody. Rory, my dad, my grandpa. I'm just a spoiled, trust-fund asshole, and I should accept that."

It suddenly dawns on him that this soliloquy has happened out loud and not in his head. Stephanie and Colin are surreptitiously glancing at each other as they watch his melt down.

He feels his face flush, and he's glad he's too high to fully absorb the embarrassment.

Finally Colin says "Fuck that, Huntz. You're not crawling back to Mitchum. You got out. Do you think I actually want to be a lawyer? Of course not, but that's what I'm expected to do. So I'm doing it. None of the rest of us- me, Seth, Robert, Lanny- none of us have had the balls to do what you did. So you're going to go to California, and you're going to kick ass at this job."

Stephanie slides on the couch next to him and pulls his head unto her shoulder. She strokes his hair and says "I don't know why Rory said no, but you are good enough for her. Maybe she isn't good enough for you. You'll find someone else who wants your avocados. Someone who deserves your avocados."

She knows as well as I do that that's not true. But I can't think about it anymore tonight. I'm so tired.

He lays his head down in her lap and fights off the tears as Stephanie rubs his forehead. He eventually drifts off into an uneasy sleep.

He wakes up the next day to find Stephanie in the kitchen whispering to Robert and Colin.

What the hell? I cannot take him right now.

"Geez, Colin. Did you send out the bat signal?"

They see he's awake and move into the living room.

"No. I told Robert that Rory was single again, and he rushed right over," Colin jokes.

They all glare at him.

"Too soon?" Colin asks, as Stephanie smacks him.

"No, Huntz. I'm here because we have a great idea," Robert says. "Colin is going to take his last final, and then we are all going to road trip to California. I've got a U-haul on the back of Colin's Rover. We'll pack all your stuff and go together. Finn's in Australia, but he'll meet us once we're there."

Logan is touched. That's really thoughtful considering how much I dislike him.

"But don't you guys have stuff to do other than babysit me? Really, I'm gonna be fine," he lies. "I'm not on suicide watch or anything."

"I'm off for two weeks once I take this test," Colin says, grabbing his bag and heading out the door.

"I'm done for ten days," offers Stephanie.

"And technically, I'm working," says Robert. "We'll stay in Westins under aliases and report back to my father how they are. Accommodations, staff, food, hospitality. We'll even make sure you get a heavenly bed out of it for your new place. Since you're kind of broke and all."

"Your job sounds great," Stephanie muses.

"Mostly it is. I'm just under the old man's thumb all of the time." Robert looks up at Logan. "You got out, Huntzberger. We're doing this for all of us."

"Okay," Logan relents. "Let's go to California!"

They start packing up, and as soon as Colin is home, they are gone. It takes them over a week to get there. They have a blast through Middle America. Stephanie in particular tends to Logan, and by the time they reach Palo Alto, Logan thinks he is going to be okay.

Once there, though, Colin and Stephanie have to fly back for school, and Robert leaves to continue his tour of Westin hotels.

Logan has about eight hours alone with his thoughts, and he realizes he is not going to be okay. He is falling apart when Finn arrives at his door.

"Thank God," Logan says as he lets him in the house. "Please tell me you have more drugs, or at least know a supplier in the area."

Finn scoffs at him, because of course he does.

"When do you start your job?" Finn asks him.

"Monday."

"Drug testing?"

"I've been high for the last two weeks, so I guess I'm fucked if they do," Logan laughs.

They get high and head out to a bar. Finn immediately tests out his accent, and Logan quickly discovers he is absolutely not ready for this.

Random girls flirt, touching his arm or knee. They whisper seductively in his ear, and one slips her number in his back pocket.

This used to be me in my zone. I would take a couple of them home with me. But now I don't want anyone to touch my body except her.

Logan feels sicker and sicker until eventually he heads to the bathroom to puke.

Finn finds him hiding in a corner a few minutes later. "Let's get you home, mate."

Once there, Finn gets Logan a bottle of water and some aspirin.

"Logan- what really happened with Rory?"

He sighs, then relives the worst conversation of his life.

"You should just call her, mate," Finn advises. "Wouldn't you take long distance over this?"

"How can I do that? She doesn't want to marry me. What if we go three more years, and she still doesn't want the same things I want?" Logan asks.

"I don't know, Logan, but if it were me, I'd swallow my pride and call her."

Finn is right. Rory was right. Long distance is not worse than this. We've done it before, and I could do it again.

His high is fading, so he calls before he loses his nerve. It goes to voicemail, and he hangs up.

"She's probably sleeping, mate," Finn says.

Or maybe she's out celebrating her wide open future with someone else. I'm sure Jess is thrilled I'm gone.

He's keep his cell close by his bed, hoping she'll call back.

The phone wakes him up the next morning.

Holy shit. It's Rory.

His brain is clouded, but he grabs the phone quickly and answers before there is time to think.

"Hey."

"Hey," she says quietly.

They sit in silence for a minute.

Please take me back. Please forgive me for walking away.

Finally, she asks "Did you call me last night?"

"I did," he says. "But you didn't answer, and I…"

"Sorry, I was asleep. You didn't leave a message, and I wanted to make sure you were okay," Rory says.

Am I okay? No, I'm not fucking okay. My heart is a mess of bloody pulp, and my head only functions on massive amounts of drugs.

She's okay? And she's just checking on poor, pitiful me?

God, I'm such a fool.

He wipes away an errant tear.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine…" I miss you so much. "I was just out with Finn, and he wondered, um, how you were doing…" And if you'd give me another chance. "And, um, so we called… but now that it seems you're fine…" How the hell are you fine? "I'll just pass that along."

I am a fucking moron.

"Oh, okay. Well, how is California?" Rory asks.

Does she think I want to make small talk?

"Uh, great…" Would be better with you. "Sunshine and all that…"

They retreat back to the awkward silence.

I can't take this. I can't let her know how broken I am, while she's just fucking peachy.

"Well, I've got to go. Glad to hear you're doing so great, and um… bye, I guess," he stammers.

Her voice is small. "Okay. Take care of yourself, Logan."

He hangs up before she can hear him sniffling.

She said no. She had reasons.

Logan walks out to the living room and packs a bowl.

I am only going to wallow for three more days. Once I start my job, I'm a new man.

Life as I know it is over. No more Rory, no more HPG, no more drugs. I have to get my shit together.

As Mitchum would say, "Time to grow up."

October 2007

"So Logan tell me about yourself," Julie says. Logan looks over at John's wife.

"Well, what do you want to know? I'm pretty simple," he responds. "I'm a trust fund brat from Connecticut, but I left my family's company, and I've settled in here with your husbands. Who are excellent partners."

"Okay. But that's the stuff we already know. What do you like to do? When you're not working with these two. What are you into?" Aimee asks.

Logan shifts his eyes to John and Kevin who are giving him apologetic looks.

Logan clears his throat, and Kevin laughs. "You wanted to get to know our wives!"

"You're right. I did. So, um, honestly, since I've been in California, I haven't gotten into much. We work a lot, ya know." Logan gives them his most charming smile.

"What Aimee was getting at is- are you single?" Julie says.

"I was trying to be more subtle than that," Aimee says. "But are you?"

"Oh, yes. I'm…single."

It still feels weird to say that.

"And you're…?" Julie says to Logan.

"I'm…?" Logan raises his eyebrows.

"He's straight," Kevin answers.

Logan laughs. "Yes, I'm straight."

"Hey. We live in San Francisco. I had to ask before I start setting him up with women," Julie says.

John scoffs. "Maybe Logan doesn't want to be set up with your friends, dear."

This is uncomfortable.

Aimee turns to him. "Do you want to be set up? Because we both have friends who would love you."

"Oh… uh, I don't… um…"

I should be ready to date. It's been four months since my heart was completely crushed. And I'm better. Much better. I only think about her five minutes a day.

"Maybe," Logan finally answers.

Although that's a self-imposed limit that I break frequently.

"We're a little older than you. Do you have an age limit?" Julie asks.

John puts his head in his hands. "I'm so sorry, man." Turning to Julie, he says "We talked about this on the ride over here."

Logan smiles. "It's fine. Um, probably thirty-five would be my limit, but I'm not one to discriminate."

Both women turn to each other and start discussing Logan's prospects.

"I'm sorry, Logan. They've both been dying to set you up since they met you. Apparently, you're very handsome. And their single friends are very horny, and they want to sleep with you. I promise Kevin and I will screen them," John says.

"Just no crazies, okay?" Logan says.

Logan goes back to his dinner, chewing slowly and thinking about the conversation. He drinks his wine and ponders his situation.

I could really stand to get laid… Horny cougars might be great.

I guess I'm going to have to start dating again.

Ugh.

A/N: I will try and update this regularly, but I am in the middle of my other work-in-progress, London Baby. Those chapters are a lot longer and require more rewatch/research. I just needed to get some of my revival thoughts going. And if you need any further backstory on what's happening with Logan, Colin, Stephanie, etc, check out my other fics. They are all in this universe.