'You know what I don't get?' Renji remarked. 'Why do people say "single as a Pringle"? Pringles are anything but single. If anything, they're cheating on each other 24/7! "Oh, Bob, I love you!" "I love you too, Betty! Well, hello there, good lookin'. Wanna make-out?'

'Renji, stop making the chips make-out or you really will be single as a Pringle,' Shinji groaned.

'Shinji! Look, I got a fit bit watch!' Renji exclaimed.

Shinji looked up from his book. 'Well, guess that explains why my wallet feels lighter,' he said dryly.

'You know, you're always reading a book when I come in and have something to say,' Renji remarked.

'One of us has to look smart,' Shinji explained.

'HEY!'

'What're you always reading anyways?' Renji asked.

'I dunno. I just grab a prop and roll with it.'

'What is it today?'

Shinji looked at the cover. '"The Art of Acting",' he read.

'If I could have a spirit animal celebrity, who would it be?' Shinji asked.

'Meryl Streep,' Renji said without missing a beat.

'Which character?'

'Miranda Priestly.'

'…I can live with that.'

'Do you sometimes feel like you have an inner black girl?' Shinji asked.

'Girrllll,' Renji drawls and snaps his fingers in a Z formation.

Shinji stared at him.

'Too much?'

'You're lucky I ask these questions in the privacy of our home.'

We now return to the adventures of Shinji and Renji pretending to be adult parents for teenage Nel

'Nel, we're being serious,' Shinji said gravely. 'I can't believe you tried to sneak out to this party.'

'You're grounded for a week,' Renji added, frowning at their scantily clad daughter.

Nel threw her hands up in the air. 'Seriously?!' she complained. 'You both knew who I was going with to this party and still said no! Have you two ever partied before?!'

'No,' Shinji said coldly.

'Yeah,' Renji chuckled simultaneously. They looked at each other with raised eyebrows.

'Well, I certainly haven't,' Shinji sniffed. 'Your Dad may have been a party animal but I knew when to listen to my parents.'

'Excuse me?' Renji said incredulously. 'This is coming from the same guy who wanted to fill his parents' jacuzzi with vodka and then proceed to cannonball into it from a diving board made of Styrofoam and beer cans?'

'WHAT?!' Nel said, her eyes popping out.

'That was supposed to be between you and me, Renji!' Shinji hissed.

'Or she can ask Grandma Hirako why there's a giant crack in the jacuzzi from where you tried to throw the grand piano-!'

'Would you like me to tell her the time you played the Bohemian Rhapsody, on butt bongos, on Ichigo's 21st birthday party in front of his parents?'

'We agreed that never happened!'

'Can I pretend this never happened?' Nel groaned.