CHAPTER ONE

Whistlin' Willy's was brimming with a strange mix of excitement and nostalgia. It was a night for celebrating. It was a night for goodbyes. For so long, everyone had gazed longingly at the light at the end of the tunnel that was high school. Now it was finally over. It was safe to say that the town of South Park held very little for restless young souls, and soon the exodus would begin. But not all would be heading the same way.

That night everyone had gathered at Willy's to say their final goodbyes to the town, and to each other. Tweek sat quietly among his friends without ever fully joining the conversation. He was too busy memorizing the faces he wouldn't see on a daily basis anymore.

"Look, I'm not saying I'm not gonna miss you," Token told Clyde with a smirk. "I'm just saying I'll be able to cut my budget for spearmint gum in half."

Clyde punched him with an indignant whine that somehow sounded the same then as it had when he was eight. In the seat next to Tweek's, Craig laughed at the exchange. The arm he was casually resting on Tweek's shoulder shook his whole frame with every chuckle. Tweek smiled at the sensation. He knew that was something he wouldn't be saying goodbye to that night at least.

"Dude, you're gonna miss me so much, I'll expect the first phone call from you before you even unpack," Clyde said and swallowed his remaining slice of pizza in a single, impressive gulp.

"Absolutely," Token said sarcastically. " I'm gonna be so upset you're not there, I totally won't even be able to enjoy my time on the beach with half naked chicks in bikinis."

While Clyde had opted for Colorado State University like Tweek and Craig, Token had decided that he was done with the cold climate of Colorado and had chosen a college in southern California. They'd joked about it extensively, but a knot had started to form in their stomachs as the days went by and they got closer and closer to the imminent farewell.

"But if you behave for the rest of tonight, I might graciously decide to answer your call - which I'm sure will actually come before I get a chance to unpack my swimming trunks," Token said.

Clyde snorted. "Bitch, please. I'm gonna be fine. I'm not the one flying solo."

"You're right. I'll be so far away, so alone," Token said with faux sadness, "that I'm really gonna miss Craig and Tweek."

Clyde kicked him under the table. Token laughed and turned to Craig.

"Enough about my struggles. How about our buddy Craig," Token teased. "He's gonna have to learn to live without his precious Gwen and Tweek."

"What the fuck, Craig?!"

"The guinea pig, Clyde," Token clarified. "Not the boyfriend."

Clyde kicked Token one last time in retaliation before getting up to mooch more pizza off Bebe a few tables over. The second he had left the table, Token's face changed. It was only for a moment, but Tweek saw a twinge of sadness pass by in the boy's brown eyes.

"Don't worry. He'll barely step four steps onto campus before he's texted you the first time," Craig reassured Token with a confident grin.

Token laughed. "Yeah, what about you two? Are you just gonna be so busy with each other you won't remember to keep in touch?"

"Yes," Craig answered. Tweek elbowed him playfully.

"Dude, we'll still have to meet up online for game nights every once in awhile," Tweek smiled. Token nodded before changing the subject, seemingly eager to postpone any further talk of separation.

"Hey, should we maybe join the other guys at the big table?"

Craig was obviously about to ask 'why' so Tweek cut him off with a less antisocial "Sure." As Token got up to move towards the bigger table, Craig shot Tweek an annoyed glance.

"Seriously, though. Why?" he asked.

"What? You don't care about saying goodbye? We grew up together, man," Tweek answered. He hadn't thought that he had sounded irritated with Craig, but his boyfriend made a grab for his hand as if he had. He entwined their fingers as Tweek pulled him after Token.

"It's not like it's an actual goodbye, though," Craig muttered when they sat down on the only pair of empty chairs that were next to each other. "They're all going to CSU, too."

"Not all of them," Tweek noted. "Just Stan and Kyle."

"Oh."

"Hey!" Kenny greeted them loudly from across the table. "If it isn't everyone's favorite power couple! How nice of you to join."

"Do we at least get to say goodbye to him too?" Craig muttered so quietly Tweek didn't think anyone else had heard. He was wrong.

"Think again, Sourpuss," Kenny smirked. "I'm moving to Fort Collins to work. So I'll be just a few miles away at all times."

Tweek laughed at Craig's disappointed face. Across from them, Cartman snorted so violently that a piece of half-chewed pizza landed in Tweek's lap. Craig brushed it to the floor before Tweek had the chance to freak out about it.

"Ha! Good luck finding a place, Kenny!" the fat teen roared. "You're gonna be spending the first two months on the street before you find something even remotely affordable."

No one openly agreed with him, but Stan and Kyle did exchange worried glances.

"Already did, fat-ass," Kenny smirked. "Two bedroom, not too bad shape, and close to CSU campus so I can always come visit."

"That's great, Kenny," Kyle said, but with a hint of doubt laced through his words. "But can you really pay rent for a two bedroom apartment on just your own salary?"

Kenny laughed and grabbed the last slice of pizza off Kyle's plate. "Haha. Of course not!" he spoke around the cheesy mouthful. "I'm gonna get a roommate. Can't be too hard. The place is so close to campus, people are gonna be begging to live with me. Hell, I'll have so many to chose from, I can even make sure they don't hurt my eyes too bad, if ya know what I'm sayin'."

"That's awesome, Ken," Stan laughed lightheartedly. "Be sure to visit whenever you have time."

Kenny loudly swallowed the final bite of the pizza slice and grinned. "Oh, I will."

The group slid into a comfortable talk about all the crazy memories they had shared together through their time in South Park. Crazy was an easy theme to come by apparently, so the stories kept coming. Tweek relaxed at the comfortable atmosphere around the table and leaned into Craig to silently take it all in. Craig took the hint and began massaging his fingers into Tweek's scalp, messing his hair up even more than it already was. This was nice. He'd spent the last couple of weeks so stressed about all the changes about to come; he'd barely slept since before graduation. It was good to able to just enjoy this moment.

After half an hour of happy remembering, Craig released his fingers from Tweek's hair to rise and go to the bathroom. And in precisely that moment, a waiter behind them dropped his entire load of dishes. They crashed loudly on the floor, and Tweek jumped four feet into the air at the noise. Feeling his heart pound violently in his throat and his age-old habit of shaking return, he was half on his way to flee the room when Craig pulled him back down into his seat. The brunet wrapped both his arms around him and put their foreheads together to get eye contact.

"It's alright."

Tweek swallowed, feeling excruciatingly embarrassed about freaking out again.

"I'm sorr-"

"It's alright," Craig repeated, this time with more intensity. As usual, there was something so astonishingly soothing about looking into those calm grey eyes of Craig's, and after a few deep coaxed breaths Tweek felt the anxiety and the embarrassment leave his body. Craig's thumb stroked his jaw, and Tweek smiled gratefully.

"Good?" Craig asked.

"I'm good," Tweek nodded.

Craig smiled at him with a nod and then got back up to continue going to the bathroom. Tweek watched him go before turning his attention back to the table full of former classmates. Token was watching him with an oddly soft expression.

"What?" Tweek asked. His friend shook his head dismissively.

"Nothing," he said. "I'm just really glad Craig's going with you to CSU."

Tweek raised an eyebrow and said, "Yeah, me too."

"Then at least we won't have to worry too much about you," Token said with a breezy chuckle. Tweek had been picking at his nails, but looked up in confusion at his friend's words.

"What do you mean 'worry about me'? Why would you be worried?"

"Well, you know …"

"What do I know?" Tweek insisted and forced himself not to break eye contact. Token finally picked up on the change in Tweek's attitude. His eyes widened.

"Well, I'm sure going off to college is gonna be stressful as fuck…" he said and scratched the back of his neck. "… And you don't exactly have a history of dealing with stress or pressure that well. I mean, not on your own at least."

"You don't think I could handle college if Craig wasn't there? Is that what you're saying?" Tweek asked in disbelief. He could feel the anger rise up, and he clenched his fists under the table in an attempt to force it back down.

Clyde had picked up on the conversation and tried to help. "He doesn't mean it that bad, but you know…"

Tweek turned to Clyde. "You think so too?!" he yelled incredulously.

Clyde and Token unchanged a look, seemingly both very uncomfortable with the situation. Then Craig sat back down in his seat, and their faces lit up with relief.

"Hey! It's Craig!"

"Buddy! Craig! How are you, Craig?"

Craig eyed his two best friends suspiciously. "What's wrong with you?"

Clyde shook his head and slapped a goofy grin on his face as he leaped out of his chair. "Nothing. Nothing. I'm … gonna go get … something."

"I'm gonna help!" Token said and fled his chair as well.

Tweek watched them leave, still angry. Craig nudged him gently.

"What's up?"

Tweek eyed his boyfriend's worried expression and tried to will the anger to disappear from his face where Craig would read it so easily.

"Nothing. Nothing's up."

Tweek didn't sleep much the following night. Instead, he spent the majority of the dark hours filing through memories of the last few years. Was he really relying too heavily on Craig? Was he completely incapable of staying sane on his own? He knew Craig had a way of reading his moods. Because of that, Tweek almost never experienced the really bad anxiety attacks anymore. Craig picked up the signals so fast that he would be calming Tweek down before they could take over completely. That didn't mean Tweek never had bad days. He did. However, he had to admit that he'd grown accustomed to Craig being by his side to prevent bad days from escalating into full-blown anxiety attacks. Tweek groaned into his pillow. Maybe the guys had a point.

The next morning over breakfast, Tweek tried to think of a subtle way to bring up the topic. He had to know if his parents' thought him as poorly equipped to handle adulthood as his friends apparently did. After ten minutes of thinking, he decided against subtlety.

"Do you think I'm weak without Craig?" he blurted out, efficiently interrupting his parents' conversation about milk brands for the new tiramisu latte they were launching at their coffee house.

At first, neither of his parents said anything. His mother sent his father a warning glance, unquestionably meant to prevent his initial response from being uttered.

"We don't think that at all, dear," she said carefully. "It's just … we feel a lot better knowing that Craig is there with you. Through the bad days, you know."

Tweek narrowed his eyes. He saw right through his mother's attempt at being diplomatic. "And if he wasn't?"

His father dropped his fork. "Why?! Where's he going?" he exclaimed.

"Nowhere, Dad. I'm just saying-"

"Well, that's good," his father audibly exhaled in relief. "It's good that you have him, son. You know how things are with you sometimes."

"Richard!" his mother scolded.

"What?"

Tweek pushed himself angrily out of his seat and left the kitchen without acknowledging his mother's calling after him. He stomped upstairs. He would surely give himself a headache if he didn't stop clenching his jaw so tightly. It didn't matter. He'd made up his mind. He slammed his bedroom door shut behind him and dug violently through his sleepover bag to recover his laptop. He heard the sound of his mother's feet on the staircase so he hurriedly locked his door. At the sound of the first knock on his door, he stuffed his ears with his headphones and turned up the sound of the first song available on his phone. Then he huffed in annoyance. That song always reminded him Craig.

Ignoring any emotion that conflicted with his anger and determination, he opened his browser and googled his way to a job-listing site.

This was the hardest part of it. Tweek had been biting his nails all morning thinking about it. The closer he got to this moment, the more he wanted to just give up on his plan altogether. He bit down on his bottom lip again. He could do this. He had to do this. No matter how little he wanted to, he had to tell Craig.

"So, what did you so urgently have to talk to me about?" Craig asked as he sat down in his usual booth at the coffee house.

Tweek had tried his best to appear calm and composed when he'd called his boyfriend earlier to ask him to come to his work to talk. From the cautious look on Craig's face, it hadn't worked. Tweek opened his mouth to answer, but immediately lost all courage when he saw Craig's eyes lock on his chewed-up nails.

"Tweek?"

Tweek saw his father watching him from the other end of the shop, mouthing a not too subtle don't do it. Insecurity was replaced with stone-cold determination once again. Be strong, he told himself.

"I've been thinking a lot about college," he said. Craig raised an eyebrow. They all had.

Tweek continued, "I know it's not probably not what you've been thinking, but I think it's really important that I try to stand on my own a little bit more. So, I got a job at a cafe in Fort Collins-"

"That's great."

"That's not all. I also found a place. Off campus. Where I'm going to live. Without you."

Tweek instantly regretted his words when he saw how they changed Craig's face. Be stronger. He swallowed down his guilt and straightened his back. He had to be firm. He had to do this. If he didn't stand his ground now, he never would.

"What are you saying?" Craig uttered, looking thoroughly horrified. "If you're breaking up with me-"

"I'm not!" Tweek interrupted. "I wouldn't. It's not about that. I just really need to do this. I need to be stronger. Or I won't ever be able to survive on my own."

Craig furrowed his brows "What? I'm slowing you down now?" he asked, raising his voice.

"No!" Tweek said. He eyed their surroundings. People were staring. "If anything I'm slowing you down."

The anger left Craig's face immediately. "I don't think you're slowing me down…" he said.

Tweek sighed. "That's not my point. My point is that…"

"What?"

"I'm the weak one, Craig!" Tweek spat out, feeling the venom of the words as they left his body. "I don't wanna be the weak one."

Craig blinked, and Tweek saw so much compassion in his eyes.

"I don't think you're the weak one."

"Well, then you're the only one," Tweek said and crossed his arms. "Everyone else thinks so."

Craig reached across the table to put his hand on Tweek's arm.

"Why does it matter what everyone else thinks?" he asked.

"Because I agree with them," Tweek answered. "I rely on you for everything. That's not good."

Craig sighed and turned his head towards the counter where Tweek's mother was taking orders from an elderly couple. Tweek could tell he was trying to push down whatever he was feeling to be supportive from the way he was pursing his lips. He'd done the same thing back in the seventh grade when Tweek had told him that he was going to be working for his parents again. Craig hadn't liked that idea either. Finally Craig relaxed the shoulders he'd been tensing since receiving the news, and his face took on its more typical pragmatic look.

"You can't be living off campus all alone, though," he stated. "Did you even find a roommate?"

"Yeah, you're not gonna like this part either. It's Kenny."