anonymous asked:

OMG i need a part 2 to the lost fic really badlyyy omg One where alex and maggie further discuss the fact that they were enegaged in alex's perfect world (only if you have the time mom) xxx

Prompt referencing this fic: /works/8856685/chapters/21833867 (chapter 20 of this fic)

Maggie's eyes are bloodshot – and she imagines hers are, too – as she lets herself be poked, be prodded, be scanned.

Be checked over by every medic the DEO's got, because she's just come out of a Black Mercy attack, and hell, at least Maggie and Kara are being subjected to similar tests, to similar invasions, to make sure they're okay from linking their brains with hers to come and rescue her.

At least they're going through the same tests, because god, god, god, she doesn't know how she'd be able to stand being alone right now.

J'onn knows. He stays particularly close to her all the while, his eyes constantly searching her face, her body, like the intensity of his gaze can protect her from everything she's reeling from.

From everything she's lost.

James and Winn know. Winn stays close to Maggie, and James stays close to Kara, but whenever they shift so the medics can get by, they touch her thigh, her shoulder, her hand. They let her know she's not alone.

Because god, god, god, they love her, and whatever she saw, whatever she lost, however long she was in her paradise only to be ripped back into a world where her sister's life is always at risk, all their lives are always at risk, Cadmus has her father, her mother doesn't know how to love her right…

They need her to know she's not alone.

And Alex tries to know. She does.

She goes home with Kara that night – of course she goes home with Kara that night, to watch old musicals and eat all the chunks out of the ice cream and let Kara wrap her arms around her and kiss her forehead and tuck her in and hold her while she cries, her words incoherent, her words unnecessary, because Kara's fallen to the Black Mercy too, and Kara loves her, and Kara knows.

James and Winn gladly take Maggie duty, take her to Winn's apartment to blow stuff up on his latest game console, because Maggie isn't the talking type, but they know she needs to eat, they know she needs to drink, and they know she won't want to be alone, either.

Because whatever she saw Alex seeing, her perfect life, her Black Mercy life? It probably kills Maggie on the inside, too.

Maggie texts before she falls asleep, sprawled on the pullout couch between Winn and James, empty pizza boxes and beer bottles problems for the morning.

Hey babe. I'm glad you're home safe. I know you're with Kara, but I'm here if you need anything. I'm here.

Alex doesn't respond – she doesn't know what to say – but Kara sees the text, and Kara slips into the bathroom and texts Maggie herself.

She smiled when she read it, Maggie, and then she started crying again. I think she's embarrassed? She's not mad at you or anything, don't worry. She's okay. She'll be okay. I'll take care of her. I hope the boys are taking good care of you.

She wipes away her own tears when Maggie texts her back.

And who's taking care of you, Little Danvers? You almost lost your sister today. You alright? You need anything?

She sniffles and yells to Alex that she's fine, she'll be right out, don't start My Fair Lady without her.

Alex is taking care of me, too. Just by being here. We got her back, Maggie. She'll heal. And so will we.

What's that your family's crest means, Kara? Stronger together? Seems applicable, huh?

Kara's heart warms and she hopes, suddenly, that Alex wants to marry Maggie in this life, too.

That the Black Mercy – that what Maggie saw – won't terrify Alex into running away.

Maggie hopes for the same, and the next night, when Alex finally responded and asked if Maggie wanted to come over, she fidgets and she gulps and she takes a series of deep, calming breaths before she raps on the door.

Alex answers almost immediately, like she'd been standing there, waiting.

She probably had been.

"Hi," Maggie says, her voice soft, her voice open, her voice vulnerable.

"Hey," Alex returns, her voice exactly the same. "Come in," she follows, sweeping her hand in, and Maggie is reminded of the night she was shot by Cyborg Superman, and her heart constricts, because in Alex's fantasy, Cyborg Superman was only the stuff of distant nightmares.

"How you holding up, Danvers?" Maggie asks, looking Alex up and down as she steps past her into the apartment, like a quick once-over of her pajama pants and henley and bare feet can tell her everything she needs to know.

"Fine. It's nothing like what Kara went through – her planet, her family, were dead, then alive, then dead again. You know?"

Maggie leans against the counter with narrowed eyes, radiating pain. "Alex, just because Kara's planet's gone doesn't make your pain any less."

"What pain?" Alex tosses her hands behind her, and she might not hear the tremble in her own voice, but Maggie does.

"We can rescue my dad and head to Midvale, and everything would be the same as it was! It's not a big deal, it wasn't – "

"Except we haven't rescued your dad, and we don't know what kind of damage Cadmus has done to him, and your mother isn't unconditionally proud of you. Hell, Alex, she's been pretty abusive to you your entire life. And Kara isn't safe, and you're not safe, and none of the people you love are ever safe, because we're all soldiers of one type or another, and in that world, the biggest threat was the sand getting too hot under your feet, so yeah, Danvers, you can be sad. It can be a big deal. You're allowed to be in pain, Alex."

She reaches hesitantly for Alex's face, and Alex leans in with a soft sigh, her eyes closed, and the tension uncoils from both of their bodies as their skin connects.

Silence. Only breathing. Only reveling in the fact that she's alive, she's alive, she came home to us, she's home, she's safe, she's safe. Until Alex breaks the silence.

"Not everything."

"What?"

"You didn't list everything that was different about that… fantasy."

Maggie's stomach twists, and Maggie braces herself not to run, not to flee, but what if Alex remembers that they were engaged, and what if Alex doesn't want that in real life, what if Alex would only want that if the world were different, if she were different, if Maggie were different, whole, if –

"We were engaged," she forces out of her lips before her legs can run.

She hears Alex's breath hitch, and she braces herself for the goodbye, for the it was fun while it lasted, for the why would I want to marry my coming out affair in real life, for the in a fantasy world, you weren't quite so damaged, but in this world, why would I ever want to put a ring on your finger?

"Yeah. Yeah, we were," is Alex's shaky reply, and Maggie looks up at her eyes, because there's fear in Alex's voice, and good god, Alex is terrified.

"Hey. Hey, it's okay. Look at me. Look at me, Alex."

She tilts her head so she can meet Alex's downcast eyes, and Alex's lips tremble.

"Are you… are you scared that I… Alex, what are you scared of?"

"We've only been together a few months, it's too much, I'm too much, it's stupid, I'm stupid, it – "

"Whoa, whoa, slow down, Danvers. Alex. It's not stupid, and you're not stupid. And yeah, okay, it might be a little early, but Alex, I… Lemme put it to you this way, Danvers. Put one of those crab bug things on my chest tomorrow – "

"Don't say something like that!"

" – and I would have a pretty damn similar fantasy. Except in mine, it'd be like our wedding day, every day, because I… Alex, I l – you're the most amazing woman I've ever met, Alex, and I love you, okay? I love you, Alex Danvers, and I – "

Her words are wrapped up in Alex's response, in Alex's I love you, too, the I love you, too that she writes with her lips onto Maggie's mouth, that she speaks with her hands on Maggie's cheeks, in Maggie's hair, that she promises with her tongue slipping into her mouth, her breath becoming Maggie's breath, her soft moans and quiet tears mingling with Maggie's until they can't tell whose is whose, and it doesn't matter, doesn't matter, because god, she loves her too, she loves her too, she loves her too.