From Desert To Dust: A Fallout NV and RWBY Crossover

Chapter 1: Old World Blues

"So, let me get this straight. You want me to go to a lab at the edge of Big Mt that specilizes in Teleportation and retrieve some tech?" The Courier stared at the Brains of Big Mt. through her trade mark authority glasses, half shaven red hair, and the old world flag draped across her back given to her by a friend in the divide. After the second battle of Hoover Dam and the eviction of NCR personal from the Mojave by her trusty securitrons, she was left as the undisputed power of the Mojave. With this power she started to reshape New Vages, and the Mojave by extension, in her image. Deals were strucked, factories reclaimed and rebuilt, infrustructure improved (which is not saying much sense it could only get better), and overall life was improved. At the center of all these improvements was the Brain's of the Think Tank.

"WERE YOU NOT LISTENING LOBOTIMITE! YOUR BECOMING A -GAH, BY OPPENHEIMER WHICH ONE OF YOU GENIUSES DECIDED TO ADJUST MY VOLUME KNOB AGAIN? WAS IT YOU DR. O?!"

"*Me? Again? Rehash Klein I'm the robotics engineer here, 8's 'speciality' is soundwaves.*"

"LIKELY STORY DR. O, ONLY SOMEONE WITH YOUR 'INTELLECT', IF YOU COULD EVEN CALL IT THAT, WOULD COME UP WITH AN ESCUSE THAT DREADFUL."

"*You always do this Klein! Degrading me every chance you get, and for the last time it's not O it's Zero. Like the number, not O, ZE-.*"

"JUST SHUT UP, POWER DOWN, AND LET ME TALK TO THE LOBOTIMITE O! NOW WHERE WAS I? ….UM... WAS IT... NO THAT'S NOT RIGHT... HMMM... GREAT... THANKS TO YOU ,O, I FORGOT WHAT I WAS SAYING!"

"Your were talking about a task to retrieve some technology from a lab that specialized in teloportation, that was before you realised that someone messed with your volume knob and got into a fight with Dr. Zero. And for the last FUCKING time Klein, my name is Alice not lobotomite." The words were spewed from the couriors mouth with a hint of venom mixed with the mounting annoyance that she could feel boiling in her viens. While the Brains of Big Mt. Were essential to her plans for the Mojave it still didn't change the fact that the Brian's got under her skin on a frequent bases with their constant bickering. The tip of the irritating ice berg being Dr. Zero's name, which Alice had continuously tried in vain to fix and save her numerose headaches.

"AH, YES NOW I REMEMBER. I WAS TELLING THE LOBOTOMITE ABOUT THE TASK WE NEED IT TO COMPLETE. SO LOBOTOMITE WE COMMAND YOU TO GO OUT AND FIND THESE TECHNOLOGIES FOR SCIENCE!"

'For fuck sake, the shit I got to deal with. Calm yourself Alice, just do the task and then you can go back to murdering powder gangers or Legion or whatever you decide needs to die.' With an heartfelt sigh she flicked a few stray strains of hair back in place before bring her gaze back to Klein. "Alright I'll do it, but before I go I have two rather important questions."

"WELL WHAT IS IT LOBOTOMITE? DON'T JUST WASN'T OUR TIME WITH YOUR BIOLOGICAL NEED FOR SUSPENSE."

"Seriously biological ne... you know what, fuck it." Alice sighed in defeat while rubbing her temple with one hand to try, in vain, to alleviate the headache that was marching across her brain. "Anyways, before I go play errand girl for you 'guinesses', do ya mind telling me why you haven't told me about this earlier? I don't know maybe as early as when you first abducted me?"

"WELL... UM... IT WAS BECAUSE OF... SCIENCE! YES THAT WAS IT. WE WERE WELL AWARE OF THE EXISTENCE OF THE LAB, BUT HAD NO NEED OF THE SCIENCE INSIDE OF IT DURING OUR QUARREL WITH -"Klein excuse was quickly suppressed as a plethora of static resounded from Dr. 8's damaged voice module.

"-Ah Dr. 8 bringing TRUTH to the LIES that Dr. Klein sent forth. DESTROYING them as if they were COMMI animals.-"

"8 and Borous are right Klein. Keeping information away from the teddy... I mean Alice... would be detrimental to our cause. Besides you already felt the wrath of her …. biologic features can do to you."

"Thank you guys. At least some of you guys have some idea of what mutual respect is." Alice complemented Darla and Borous as she gave Klein a glare that seemed to cause Klein's thought process to melt as if it was a junkie getting blasted by a plasma rifle.

"I... UH... WHAT I MEANT TO SAY... UM... MOVING ON! WHAT WAS YOUR LAST QUESTION LOBOTOMITE? WE DON'T GOT ALL DAY! WE HAVE... UH... EXPERIMENTS AND... AND DATA TO DO... SCIENCE THINGS WITH, YES THAT WAS IT SO SPIT IT OUT."

"All right Klein, just calm down don't want your dome to burst now would ya. Anyways back on topic, my last question is where the hell is the lab anyways? You never even bothered to tell me where the fucking place is in the 'debriefing' as you called it."

"UM..WELL ITS... BOROUS YOU ANSWER THE LOBOTOMITES QUESTION AS IT NEAR ONE OF YOUR LABS."

"-Ah yes Z-14 home of my MIGHTY creation, the Cazador. DOCILE, STERILE, and SECURED in the lab.-" The sound of Borous gloating about his 'brilliant' and 'docial' monstrosity filled the Think Tank as everyone but Borous was confused by his rambling and how it pertained to the location of the other lab. Alice, while still confused, had a creeping fear as to how this boastful rambling pertained to her quest, though she didn't like the implication. Summing courage through the ever mounting gut wrenching fear she look Borous right in the eyes/monitors, and with a deep inhale she asked the dreaded question she feared she already knew the answer too.

"So Borous, you mind telling me and the rest of the brain's how this all pertains to where the teleportation lab is? 'Cause all you've been doing for the last few minutes is gushing over your creation's."

"-And then there was the nigh... Huh? Oh right, as it be the upper levels of the lab have COLLAPSED with the passage of time. However there is ANOTHER entrance hidden in the back of Z-14 that I installed in case my time as GOD resulted in me creating a MONSTER in the lab. But don't worry because as I mention earlier the cazadors are COMPLETELY docile, so it should be a walk in the park.-"

Alice just stared at Borous with a thousand yard stare letting the damming information crawl throughout her mind. The memories of past engagements with the cazadores flicker before her eyes, while the sound of their wings beating the air flood into her ears deafening. At the same time she could feel the phantom bite of their venom coursing through her veins as it burned away at the flesh beneath her skin. Alice gave a small smile as her body protest every notion of going anywhere near Z-14. As her body pumped her full of phantom venom a slight chuckle could be heard before she said a single phrase, "Fuck my life".