Summary: By sheer chance- a chance that resembled a glittered turd- something changed. Gears were shifted, the world froze and the universe decided to throw me a platter, serving an unfathomable realm with blue aliens on stripper poles, a perilous job in Chora's Den, Geth and, eventually Commander Shepard.

RE-UPLOAD. Sorry, I may have, by accident, deleted the fic- IGNORING THAT, I'M RE-UPLOADING IT Q_Q

(I hate my life)

Nell Daniels.

My name was Nell Daniels.

Not Alice. Not Dorothy. Not Sam Tyler. Not Alex Blake.

I was Nell Daniels.

Sometimes Nellie. In other circumstances, Penelope. Someone even referred to me as Pen, once. That was an odd person.

I was a normal college student finishing their course, working frantically under the pressuring deadlines. I lived with my uncle in the UK, in a suburban town called Upminster around the south east of London. I was unemployed. I didn't belong in Wonderland. I didn't belong in Oz. I wasn't a detective. I had no skills with guns or close quarters combat.

So, why in Jim's Jesus crackers, was I sitting in the middle of a C-Sec holding cell?

The last thing I remember was having a stroll through some unexpected heavy rain in order to go buy myself some Ben and Jerry's. Cookie dough edition. I was listening to Slipknot through my blaring earphones. My boots were thoroughly soaked through due to a rather large puddle I had stepped in, giving me unpleasant, cold sledges as soles. I remember cursing the invisible man in the sky I didn't even believe in and I had continued walking before the brightest blue light had suddenly engulfed me. Then I blacked out.

I woke up in the middle of some sort of lake, spluttering and coughing water out of my lungs. Clinging hair in my eyes to block my view of the cruel, impossible world beyond me. A strong, rough feeling hand had gripped my shoulder and pulled me to safety, allowing me to spit out the water that that had forced it's way into my mouth and made me feel like a balloon with too much air pumped into it.

I choked and wiped my lips with the back of my hand, then spat on the floor and looked up at whoever had helped me. I seemed to stare for a really long time. My jaw unhinged, dropping to the floor.

At first, he said some witty remark but the longer I just gazed up at him he began to seem uncomfortable and awkward before he asked if I was alright, my obvious gawking didn't do too much to help my case even if I probably held a sign that said 'stable person here' to him.

Piercing blue eyes peered down at me. I sat there feeling like a drowned rat. My hair flat against my face and my clothes stuck to my skin. I continued to stare blankly at him, slowly processing every trait in front of me. The blue, metallic carapace. The alien, avian features. The mandibles. The sound of his sickeningly familiar, gravelly voice.

It was then I also noticed my surroundings.

The buildings on either side of me, and on the other end of this place are curved inwards, with a large lake in the middle separating them. Aside from that, the whole place seems to be built to resemble a lush garden, boasting of flourishing grass, trees and bushes along the walkways and bridges connecting one end of the lake to the other. Above, aside from the alien tinted sky, I saw lots of aircraft, with no visible engines, flying about in a neat and orderly manner like how traffic was back home. Quiet too, for a vehicle moving at such high speeds, those things are oddly silent with the exception of a soft whirring noise that its giving out.

The aesthetic of the place was unsettlingly recognisable. An earthquake shattered through my chest, my world crashing down upon me the more my gaze wildly darted around to carefully analyse my surroundings.

My thought process was ridiculous. Completely ludicrous. A bunch of bollocks.

The Citadel was fictional.

The Citadel belonged in a video game world called Mass Effect. This sort of stuff only happened in television and comic books and anime. Like Sword Art Online for example.

A woman wondered by, she gave me a curious, confused glance but quickly ignored me when I saw her. Her arm joined with another person- another woman. One with pale blue colored skin and a feminine figure walked past, her tight full body gown that trailed slightly behind her heeled feet, strategically and stylishly placed cuts that bared the sides of her waist. A gown designed to fully show off the curves of a woman's body yet suited for formal wear, to draw attention yet revealing not too much skin.

At first, it took a while for my stunned brain to respond and to process the fact instead of hair, she had tentacles.

The air was sucked out of my lungs and I faintly felt my heart skip a beat. No. That isn't possible.

A numbing shock had flooded my body whilst my throat constricted uncomfortably, brain loading like a slow buffer sign with a bad internet connection. It was like every fibre of my soul was rebooting, overheating with too much data being thrown at me.

A hand- a talon, waved in my face, as well as an impatient, "Spirits. Just my luck if you're a mute."

My ears perked, a nagging sensation hammering at the back of my skull. Inside the walls of my flesh, the bones had stiffened into stone and my blood was as solid as the ice in the Atlantic.

I slowly rose my gaze, meeting one of confusion, soft concern and mild annoyance.

Garrus Vakarian.

My mind came up with theories, of course.

One was that I had been hit by lightning and was very delusional and my head was in the state of an extreme concussion. But if I had been hit by the said bolt, I very much doubted I would've been alive unless I had been reduced to a vegatable withering on the ground hallucinating about being in a fictional universe.

I had been tempted to think I was on drugs. However, I sincerely doubted no amount of experimental drugs would do this to you. No matter how crazy.

There was the dream idea. And I of course had tested this immediately by reaching over and pinching myself in the leg until I left a mark. It stung like hell and I gained an odd look from the fictional alien I still hadn't answered but it pointed to evidence that no, I wasn't dreaming. This was real. Very much real.

That cancelled out the dreaming in a coma idea.

And finally, when I concluded the last theory, which was an incredibly surreal concept, the world around me started to spin, Garrus stepped forward in alarm when he realised what was gradually happening. Everything blurred, black spots started to cloud my vision like a curtain-

Then I fainted.

"Oh hey, the hairy one is waking up."

I let out a hoarse groan and licked my chapped lips before I moved my head to the side in a failed attempt to face away from the light. The voice of a stranger caused me to tense up and to force myself out of my groggy trance. My eyes opened and narrowed my eyes at first through the bright light shining in my gaze. Everything was blurred. Why is it so… white?

"And here I thought I'll have nothing more to do aside from staring at your unconscious self, thank the goddess." Despite my dazed state, it was clear to me that the statement was anything but thankful.

"The… fuck…?" I managed a tired slur. I pushed my hair out of my face and blinked a few times. A grimace twisted on my face as my vision cleared. Where the hell…?

"And she speaks! This day is starting to look better and better."

Pushing my hands against the solid mattress I had found myself lying on, I sat up and craned my head over to where the voice was coming from, squinting.

Dull grey walls, a small bunk on the other end with someone, something, sitting on it. A sealed door with a red display on the other end… Something?

My eyes shot wide open, an electric jolt shooting through my body. My gaze cast to the figure right in front of me, staring at me with a bemused look. Pale purple skin, an odd skin hugging clothing that dipped down the middle of her chest in a big v-neck, straps curling around her neck and leaving slits in her waist. It clung to her hips and covered the top of her thighs. A crest at the back of her head.

Asari.

An. Asari.

Right there.

What.

The.

Actual.

Living.

Fuck.

Her mouth twitched. "Hey, human. I'm not on a sex cam, I can see you staring."

I almost didn't process her words. Gripping the material of my jeans tightly, I forced my gaze away from her and stared down at my hands, looking them as if they'd give me all the answers. Okay. Don't panic. Just close your eyes, count to three….

I opened my eyes.

Still there.

Wake up.

I turned from her and span to the door, feeling my heart racing and my knees start to tremble slightly when I saw the red light. Locked. That usually meant locked.

"So… you are a quiet one? Shame, was really hoping to pass the time with some conversation."

Need to get out of here.

Need to leave.

Walking to the door, I put my hand up and tried to open it. To no avail. It was welded shut. I slammed my fist against it, feeling dread start to drag my heart down to my stomach. This isn't happening.

"Rude too, wonderful." A shuffling sound behind me as the Asari moved to lie down on her mattress, bunk.

"Hey! Hello?" I called out, grimacing at the croaked voice that emitted from my lips. I raised my hand and slammed my fist against it. I need a drink. "Excuse me? Anyone out there?"

"Don't bother, and oh, toilet's behind that low wall. That's where you get your drinks too so please, clean it after you're done using it. Athema's ass, I rather not be drinking water contaminated by human piss, don't know about you though."

Maybe… she knows.

Or he- they didn't really have a specific gender, did they?

Shit, here goes. Don't freak out.

The organ in my ribcage felt heavy and I sharply inhaled, then finally spoke to the asari, hoping I wouldn't lose my sanity in the process. "Where are we? Why am I here?" I should rephrase. "How- in Satan's shitty toilet- did I get here?"

Okay, I managed a few good words without stuttering, good start.

"C-Sec Tayseri Ward Downtown Precinct holding cell." She muttered offhandedly, sitting up straight and hanging her legs off the bed lazily. The wall was my only support, knees close to buckling. "How you got here, well, I don't know. What did you do? Kick a volus? Urinated into the Presidium lake? Slapped a janitor?"

This has to be a dream. This isn't real. How the fuck can this be real? Let me wake up.

My fingers traced the red hologram. It flickered, I pushed my palm flat against the surface. The door was cold. Solid. Real. It all felt too real. Am I really here?

This is fucked.

"You are not a serial killer are you? Hope not, I rather not spend the rest of my time here pinning you to the wall. Or dunking you into the toilet."

I ignored her question. On the exterior, I probably appeared calm and collected, but in actuality my mind was running a million miles a minute. A thousand thoughts per second were rushing through my brain, yet all I could focus on was the numbing haze. My blood pumped furiously through my veins, heart galloping to space.

This is really bad.

"I don't belong here." I said aloud, not to anyone particular. I was struggling not to lose it at this point. My fingers curled against the wall, trying to grip hold of something to prevent me falling into an abyss of madness. I don't belong in this universe, let alone this room.

"So said everyone who ended up in a cell." She sighed, words sharpening with her growing annoyance. I felt my breath hitch. What am I going to do? Where are the officers? Maybe I can talk to one of them.

I had no idea what I was going to do once out of this cramped space, but I had to keep calm. Having a panic attack wasn't going to solve anything. I needed to get out of C-Sec. They'd lock me in a mental institute if I ran around in circles like a headless chicken yelling about Reapers and alternate dimensions.

Even if I wasn't here- even if this was all some… crazy dream and I was in a coma- I had to concentrate. I had to keep my cool.

My shoulders tensed when a sudden thought came to mind. I crossed my arms and distanced myself from the alien, pushing my back into the door. The air felt restricted. The space too tight. I was never claustrophobic, but I suddenly felt trapped. "So, why exactly are you here?"

Slowly, a wicked grin plastered across her face, eyes gazing over my body in appreciation. My muscles stiffened. "Sex predator. Best hope someone lets you out before I lose control of my urges again, you certainly look cute enough." I chose to believe she was joking and let out a nervous laugh, scratching the back of my head. Oh god, please be joking. "Public intoxication, not interested in your kind anyway. No offense. Too much fur all around."

Fur?

My fingers self-consciously fiddled with a strand of my hair. She's talking about my hair? Weird. Well, maybe not. The asari probably find it strange we have soft hair instead of those odd tentacle things. I know I definitely find that weird.

Another realisation burned into my brain.

Fuck.

I had no ID here.

I wasn't registered on the Citadel.

Therefore, I was technically a criminal. A trespasser, most likely arrested for just being here- even if I was forced by some unknown source or person.

The weight holding me up quickly vanished with a hiss, gravity yanked me backwards into something. Arms wrapped around my torso, catching me. I froze up at first before I craned my head around to look at who helped me. Embarrassingly enough- I let out a short squeak of fear when I saw the features of a salarian. Oh no, not again.

I quickly got out of his grasp, trying to settle down the feeling of panic churning uneasily in my stomach. I was borderline having a heart attack here.

"D'yseva, you are free to go. Now get out, I don't want to see you back here anytime soon."

The Asari let out a sigh of contentment as she raised her legs and pushed forward, using the momentum to get up on her feet in one elegant motion, walking to the door. She turned her head slightly as she reached the exit. "See you around, hairy one. Maybe we'll do business sometime." She giggled, and she was gone, the salarian watching her leave, large eyes blinking rapidly before he shot me a brief glance.

He looked…. irritated.

I swallowed and gave an awkward wave. "Hi, there. I'm… I'm sorry about... that."

Congratulations Nell, you're doing a great job of first impressions with these aliens.

He looked over at me in silence, not responding in anyway to my awkward apology. Until his hand moved, hit something, and closed the door between us.

My jaw dropped. What the hell?

"Oh what the- Hey! Wait a second! Come on!" My palms were sore when I continuously hit the door. Turns out hitting metal hurts. "You can't just leave me in here!"

I jumped back when part of the door hissed away to reveal a thin window of glass with the irked salarian officer on the other side peeking into it. "You'll be let out the moment we finish sorting things out on our end." His voice came from a small built in speaker on the wall beside the door. "Now be quiet."

The door stared back at me once more. My shoulders slouched as anxiety stirred in my gut. Sorting things out? What were they going to do with me? What the hell is going on?

My arms wrapped themselves around my stomach and I walked over towards my bunk. I hugged my legs to my chest and pressed my back up against the wall. The blinking light in the corner of the room from the camera mocked me. I gritted my teeth and stared down at my boots, struggling not to cry.

Images momentarily flashed in my eyes, to my friends and family. I felt my chest tighten painfully when I thought about them and if I would see them again but I swatted them out of my mind. I couldn't allow myself to think about that right now. I had to focus on getting the hell out of here and figuring out how the hell I got here in the first place.

And why.

What seemed like hours later, which was probably just thirty minutes, the door finally hissed open again, and the same annoyed salarian stood in the doorway. He greeted me with a bored monotone. "Come on out human, we have some questions."

The bed creaked when I stood up and I nervously, silently, headed out the door, sending him a sideways glance.

He led me through the precinct, passing by numerous other aliens who worked at C-Sec, along with the occasional human or two. I tried my best not to stare too much but it was impossible. I found myself gaping at a variety of things, even the simple holograms, like a naive fresh tourist. The salarian put his hand on my shoulder, fingers tightening and jolting me forward. I chose to keep my head down further on.

Bringing me to what that looked like your standard police interrogation room, he led me down on the side of the table facing the mirror and turned to one of the other officers present. "Where's T'laora?"

"Just transferred to handle the Northside case." The turian shrugged.

"She's supposed to be handling this." He growled, the aggravated noise rumbling out of his throat. He leaned out of the door. "Vakarian!" He barked, and my heart stopped. My head snapped up. "You got some time on your hands?"

Vakarian?

The voice I heard a second later unmistakably belonged to my favourite infamous fictional alien. "Yeah, what about it?"

I felt a hand nudge me an inch or two forward, keeping a hold of me so I didn't attempt to run, I assumed. Not like I could anyway, due to being surrounded by a bunch of C-Sec agents and being in space. I had nowhere to go. "Mind handling this one? T'laora's disposed at the moment."

Then I saw him. There was definitely no mistaking that facepaint, the turian in question glancing down at the datapad he's given with lack of interest. "You do know that I'm under the trafficking department right?"

Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit. What the shit. What the shit. Oh my god.

Garrus.

Garrus fucking Vakarian. i would react like that as well if I saw garrus in real life

I suppressed a scream and had to forcefully correct my jaw when it hit the floor before he could catch me looking stunned. An explosion of feelings lashed at me in the face. A mixture between awe, fear and a strong sense of nausea that punched me in the gut. Don't faint again- hell, don't puke.

"Then this shouldn't be much of a problem for you, not much of a difference compared to what you're used to." The salarian replied. And he was off. What's the rush about? He on a schedule?

Garrus, The Garrus Vakarian, gave a sigh, then sat down in the chair in front of me. I swallowed the hard lump that constricted my throat and moved my stiffened limbs, which felt rusted like an old bike, to sit down. "Alright, let's start with something simple, your name miss?"

Holy shit.

Holy shit.

Holy shit.

Garrus.

When I didn't respond, he cleared his throat and asked again. "Name?"

"Nell. Daniels." I forced out of my mouth, just barely able to enunciate the words properly. There was a clear strain in my response. Either he pretended not to notice, he didn't care.

"Age?"

Out of habit, I fiddled with the hem of my sleeve. My wide, astonished eyes unable to stop gazing at the alien. I pushed the answer out from my teeth, internally cringing at the high pitched octave that shook in my voice. "...Seventeen."

"Awfully young to be in the station aren't you?" He noted offhandedly. "Alright Miss Daniels, according to the report, an off duty officer found you stumbling around the Presidium at 18 32 galactic standard time, or 23 52 Earth standard GMT 0…" His voice trailed off before he looked up at me, eyes widening slightly in recognition. "Oh, you."

I threw him an awkward wave, giving a sheepish chuckle. Raising my hand, I wiggled my fingers. There was a cheerful note in my response, most likely due to the fact I was known by one of my favourite characters. "Heh, hi again!"

I probably look like a nut job.

He stared at me from across the table for a moment, regarding me carefully, then looked down at the datapad. Heat flushed in my cheeks. "May I ask what were you doing at that time?"

My mouth thinned as my excitement dimmed. I scratched my cheek, averting my eyes. I fought for a clever retort- something witty or humorous- but all that came out of me was a dumb- "Oh. Um… no?"

My own answer sounded like a question.

Honestly, I didn't even have an answer to give him. I was wondering all the things he was obligated to ask me.

All I knew was walking, drowning- now I was here. In a place far from home.

Seriously, what even happened?

This is so real, but it has to be a dream.

"You collapsed not long after that, and while there were no traces of substances in or on you, do you have a history of drug abuse?"

The question snapped me out of my fangirling shock, nearly making me laugh at the absurdity of it. "What?" I blinked. "No, of course not."

The only drugs I had ever used were antihistamines for hayfever or Paracetamol or Ibuprofen when I got a headache, then there was the Feminax for lady issues. I doubted that they'd have this strong of an effect to make me hallucinate a fictional video game.

Urgh, this is trippy. This is way too trippy.

I'm sitting here. In the Citadel- in C-Sec, being interrogated by the one and only Garrus Vakarian. Someone definitely messed with my coffee.

"Any idea, or past medical condition to explain your sudden loss of consciousness?" I shook my head.

He tapped something on the pad. From my angle, I could just make out a passport photo of me on it. I felt my back stiffen. Where did that come from? "Do you have a job? Place or residence?"

I shifted in my chair and glanced at the mirror on the wall. Usually people were behind those. I guess the times haven't changed that much. I don't have a place or a job. That'll obviously seem suspicious but I can't think of anything right now. "I..."

I wasn't a great liar in the face of pressure. I never really liked lying, it was just easier to tell the truth most of the times. Amnesia was a thing that came to mind, though. If I tried hard enough I could play off having amnesia and avoid the questions that would lead to me to my ultimate doom.

To pull it off would be difficult, but it seemed easier to pretend not to remember.

Fuck, come on.

He sighed, again. "Ms Daniels, I can't help you if you don't help me."

"I-I don't remem-remember." I lied through my close to chattering teeth. I sat on my hands to stop from fidgeting. "I-I can't tell-tell you what I don't know."

Crap. Crap. Crap.

"Very well. It says here that you are not registered as a resident of the Citadel." He stopped briefly to let his words sink in. My heart kicked up, pounding against my chest. "And neither do you have the right papers that grants you the rights to be permitted on, or find work on this station. Do you have any explanations regarding this?"

I leaned back against the vertical surface of my chair. Shit. Shit. Shit. This is bad. This is really bad.

"Heh. Would you believe me if I said this entire universe is a video game and I may have accidentally dimension jumped here?" I gave a dry smile at the look on his face. He thinks I'm being sarcastic. I grew quiet, fidgeting from the sheer piercing of his gaze. "Yeah. Didn't think so."

I wish humorous Garrus was making an appearance. Serious-job-interrogation Garrus is intimidating to all hell. Maybe it's his stare. He had a way with scary expressions, despite being a different species.

"I'm afraid your humor does you no credit here Ms Daniels." He leaned forward, his natural turian predatory features boring down on me. He knows I'm stalling. My breath hitched, I dug my nails into my skin to stop me from moving away. "How did you get on the Citadel? Any names?"

I crossed my leg, trying not to let it bounce. It was a nervous habit. "I told you, I don't remember."

What am I gonna do? Shit. This is bad.

"I'm afraid that will not help your situation here, the Citadel has very strict immigration rules. If you are unable to explain this 'discrepancy' in your records and clear it, C-Sec will have no choice but to press the charges of illegal immigration." He explained it clearly. Fuck. "Cooperate, and the court may be lenient, then you will be handed off to the Alliance for immediate deportation. Or, worst case scenario if the jury decides to make you an example, you will face a mandatory prison sentence of three years, then you will be handed off to the Alliance for deportation."

I gritted my teeth. I'm in a damn big pickle here. I don't even like pickles. Who the hell likes pickles? Pickles are gross looking and taste horrible. Only people with no souls eat pickles...

Getting a little off topic, Nell.

"Alright." I cleared my throat. Maybe if I twist the truth a bit… I mean, I don't have to admit that I'm from a different dimension. "I'm sorry, I just…" I shakily exhaled and raked a hand through my hair. "Truth be told, I… really don't know. The last thing I remember was walking around-"

There was a slight ping on his datapad, and whatever that was on it caused Garrus to frown, then look back up at me with what that looked to be suspicion, with barely concealed annoyance just beneath it.

Saved by the datapad.

I felt my heart skip a beat at his stare. "Is there a problem, officer?"

He frowned, or what I believed to be a frown, a talon tapping against the table. Hard enough that I could see the scratches left behind on its surface. "Apologies Ms Daniels. There's… been a new development, now your records show that you have a place of residence in the Silver Lotus Estates, and a history of narcolepsy, which you received treatment for a couple years back."

"What?" I blurted at the confusing news, but quickly cleared my throat and sat up. Just go with it. "Uh- right!" I slapped my head dramatically. "Yep. That. Heh! Slipped my mind. I'm such a dits!"

Just act casual you moron.

He still looked very skeptical. Didn't blame him, I definitely knew those reports weren't real. I never suffered with narcolepsy in my entire life. There was a small case of sleepwalking when I was younger- but I somehow doubted it would help in this scenario. "Looks like the treatment didn't work out well." He stood up, talons tightly wrapped around the datapad. "Apologies for the trouble Ms Daniels. You may go."

I just sat there for a minute, staring at him. He returned the gesture. I quickly nodded and stood up, offering out my hand like an idiot. "Right! Um, nice meeting you, sorry about the circumstances! Vakarian, was it?"

"Its Officer Vakarian, human." He leaned in slightly. "And I'll have my eye on you." He whispered in a lower, much more dangerous tone. The one he reserves when he's intensely focused on a task in the game.

"Uh-huh!" I awkwardly took my hand back before he could bite it off. "I should be off! Probably left the oven on- or my hair straightners-" I didn't even own hair straighteners. I was just rambling now. "Probably forgot to feed my dog- anywho- chao!"

Christ. Just go you stupid girl.

I felt his talon wrap around my wrist, stopping my escape. His blue eyes peered down at me, narrowing. "Mammary pets are very illegal on the Citadel, Ms Daniels."

I let out a forced laugh. "Did I say dog? As in real dog? Silly me- I meant- uh, my digital pet! You know, like those adorable little Nintendogs? The ones parents give to their kids in preparation before giving them a real one so they know how to be responsible but it doesn't really match up to the responsibility to a real life animal- you know what, I'm gonna shut up now."

The longer I stayed, the more I seemed to make a fool out of myself in front of one of my favorite video game characters. When I was nervous, I tended to ramble. And boy- was I rambling.

I could almost feel him itching to have me tossed back into a cell. "You, are free to leave, Daniels."

"Okay." I meekly nodded. His talon released my arm and I turned on my heel, zipping out of his line of sight before he kills me.

When I got around the wall, I collapsed against it, letting out a heavy breath.

Holy shit.

I just got interrogated by Garrus Vakarian.

If this is a dream, this is a good dream.

If it isn't... this is bad.

When I realized odd looks were directed at me, I lowered my head and headed out of C-sec.