(A/N: As with every story I write, introductions are always in order. This one especially requires one. For those of you that are huge Danganronpa fans, my co-writer, Setsubou, and I made this story for all of you. Welcome to therapy. We will do our best to alleviate your despair with a fun little story we've whipped up and planned out during the course of the airing of Danganronpa 3: The End of Hope's Peak Academy. Due to the increasing amount of despair caused by this anime and the emotional trauma you may endure from watching it, we decided to make this story as an…alternative to those feeling pained by everything that happened.

I know most of you out there hate self-insert stories, but veterans of my work can vouch for my skill level. There's a reason this story has the description and title it does. Setsubou and I have taken great pains to make sure that this story has something for everyone reading it out there. Not to mention we both have our own self-inserts so our ideologies and characters will conflict, even if we both are after the same goal: stopping Junko Enoshima. But how can we stop what we don't know is coming? Can two butterflies forever alter the course of history just by being themselves? Who knows? Either way, we want our Author Avatars to react to situations the way we feel we naturally would respond to given stimuli and since nothing about this story is extreme in any way, that makes things a lot easier.

We have taken both games, Danganronpa IF and Zero, and the new third anime into account when outlining it. We are satisfied with how our outline turned out and…now it's time for you to see the fruits of our labor. We hope you enjoy this adventure as much as we did crafting it. Now sit back, relax, and enjoy, One Year Ahead, One Mile Behind. But before that, I will give my co-writer the chance to say a few words).

(CA/N: Setsubou here! In the spirit of keeping things short and sweet, I will just say that while this is a much lighter and softer take on the Danganronpa universe, always keep in mind that the forces of Despair are capable of unparalleled cruelty. My job is to make sure we stay true to the spirit of the franchise, so while we may plan for an ending with a sunnier attitude, the road to get there may not be a smooth one. Also, all your waifus are belong to us. Upupupupu)

This is a story of hope that ends in a happy ending. I've always liked stories like that. Unfortunately, life is never quite that simple. You won't know if you have a happy ending until you're too old to really enjoy it. That's why I've always had a penchant for fiction and spreading tales wherever I go.

Greetings, my name is Alex Goldrose. I'm an American-Japanese immigrant as of two years ago. See, my dad has a great disliking towards the current American President, Ronald Drumpf, and would not stay in the country with him in charge. We thought about moving to Canada, but then he managed to secure a sweet job in advertising right here in the land of the rising sun.

My Japanese is…well it's a marked improvement from when we first moved here. I speak it quite well. Writing's another story, but…eh, I'm learning. I guess it also helps that I've been watching anime with subtitles since I was nine. I also had a private tutor my first year here rather than enroll in a middle school for 8th grade. Studying for that was atrocious. And high school entrance exams? Never heard of such a thing back in America. Of course, with my brain, still a piece of cake. Of course, in the long run, that didn't matter.

About two months ago, my family received a letter in the mail. It was a letter from a school called Hope's Peak Academy welcoming me as its Ultimate Storyteller. Apparently during my time in Japan, someone investigated my background back in America and apparently I'd made a bit of a name for myself with just the scant few people I'd met during my time here in Japan.

It's not a lie though, I do have a knack for telling stories. Whether it's on paper or spoken word of mouth, I can tell it like you're there. I also don't do bad impressions of the participants either. I always thought I was tooting my own horn in thinking so, but if Hope's Peak thinks so then it must be true.

After the acceptance letter, my dad got a transfer to a home closer to the school. I'm close with my family. We're a tight knit group, especially with my grandparents still living in the states, along with my extended family. I think the one having the hardest time adjusting is my mom. She's an editor for doujin magazines. I mean…granted she used to edit porn magazines back home, but…this is something else. I bet she never expected to have to look at futanari or tentacle porn in her entire life.

Right now I'm on my way to Hope's Peak for my first day. I'm so excited. No one ever liked me back home. I was a social outcast. Girls never gave me the time of day. Jocks always picked on me. It was, to me, hell on Earth, especially elementary school. I'm hoping I meet a cute girl that likes me for who I am that isn't loose or considerably ugly. Probably not possible, but hey, I can dream.

Life is funny sometimes. Not funny like a punchline, but funny like a young teen rebel fighting against a tyrannical empire and falling in love with its top general…who just so happens to be a sadistic Yandere. It's—

SLAM!

Like I said. Life is funny. In the next instant, the next thing I knew I was falling on my ass, thrown back by the weight of the person I crashed into. As my ears stop ringing, in instinctually rub my head. Well…that could've been… I look ahead to see who I crashed into …worse?

On the ground, legs spread slightly was a girl in a nurse's outfit and an apron. She had bandages on her arms and legs and whined as soon as she hit the ground on her back. I couldn't see her face clearly, but I could see her dark brown hair sprawled out onto the ground. Holy shit I knocked over a girl.

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry," I blurted out in my best Japanese. "L-lemme help you up." I rushed over to her and extended my hand. Instinctually, she grabbed it. Her hand was soft and, as I pulled her to her feet, I finally got a good look at her. Her timid, brown eyes stared back at me like she wasn't sure if I was about to attack her. It was hard to tell by her clothes, but she did seem rather well-endowed. The rest of her body didn't seem that disproportionate either. I mean, nothing too out there, but definitely pretty.

"U-um…" her voice was gentle like a snow flake gently drifting down towards the ground. I watched her gaze travel towards where our hands were linked. "Ah! I'm sorry!" she suddenly pulled her hand away from me and recoiled. "I-I was s-still h-holding y-your hand w-without p-permission."

I blinked multiple times. Is she for real? I mean, there was timid and…well there was whatever this was.

"A-and n-now y-you're not talking to me." She looked down at the ground, tears forming in the corners of her eyes. "You must already hate me."

"Of course I don't! I just met you!" I exclaimed. "And forget about me, are you okay? You landed on your back. You're not hurt are you?"

"Ah…" she looked at me like the eyes a princess would look at her savior. She stared at me for a few seconds in complete silence. It was…kind of embarrassing. She then whimpered a little and tears started to form. She bowed. "Th-thank you f-for being w-worried about me!" She stood up straight, tensing up, clenching her hands to her chest, flustered. "B-b-but…y-you d-don't h-have t-to b-be s-so worried." She smiled, looking embarrassed, stroking her finger along the side of her temple. "I-I have fallen harder b-before. Th-this is no big deal."

And we've crossed from timid into battered housewife territory. Seriously. I gave her an award winning smile. "Well," I said, "as long as you're not hurt, I'm happy. Sorry about that."

"N-no! I-I'm sorry, I-I bumped into you. I wasn't watching where I was going."

I bowed at a precise perpendicular angle. "The dishonor is all mine," I told her. "A gentleman should never disrespect a lady." I stood up straight. "But…" I chuckled and smiled. "I accept your apology nonetheless."

She suddenly burst into tears. "Th-thank you. N-no one's ever apologized t-to me before."

And now I didn't just feel bad, I felt…enraptured. This girl…what made her this way? I mean, back home I know I had self-esteem issues, but this was a whole different caliber. It took all of my willpower not to take a few steps further and give the poor thing a hug. I thought it best to calm her down before anything else. "What's your name?"

"Huh?"

"When meeting new people, it's always courteous to exchange names. I'm Alex, clan name Goldrose. You are?"

"U-um…I-I'm M-Mikan. Tsumiki, Mikan. U-um i-it's a p-pleasure t-to meet you G-Goldrose-san."

"Whoa, okay, no. Goldrose-san is my father. Call me just Alex."

"O-okay! Th-then y-you can call m-me b-by m-my first name too."

I smiled and laughed. "Fair enough, Mikan."

She started laughing nervously. It was a really cute laugh. And between her demeanor and her body, her whole being just rang out with alarm bells of cuteness. Yup, no turning back now, I was definitely attracted to this girl.

However, the mood was suddenly ruined when Mikan let out a scream. "Ah!" she shouted, surprised. "Th-the entrance ceremony! We're going to be late!"

"Calm down," I said. "We've still got a few minutes and we're already here." Averting my gaze from her, I asked timidly. "Um, do you want to…sit together?"

"Hah?" She seemed surprised by the question. "D-do you really…want to sit…with someone like me?" she asked. She seemed positively giddy at the prospect.

I could feel my heart melting, lip forcibly quivering. She better never ask me for a pony or I'm not going to be able to say no. "Of course," I said, smiling. "Er…if you want to."

"Y-yes!" she exclaimed, sounding nervous, but no less unsatisfied. "Th-thank you."

"Well then, come on, I'll race you there!"

"Race? Wait a—"

I began to take off only to turn my head and see that Mikan, in an attempt to run after me, had fallen on her back again, though I took an accurate guess that she'd tumbled forward rather than wobbled backward. How she landed on her back with her legs spread open was beyond me. Her shoulder bag was also providing great censorship so that I couldn't look up her skirt. Sighing, I helped her up again.

"Uncoordinated huh?"

Mikan just looked timidly at the ground.

"Okay, no racing then," I said.

"Huh?" she seemed surprised by my words.

"We'll just walk together. No rush. We've got plenty of time. I'm sure we'll find two open seats."

"Y-you want to walk together…with me?" The water works were real with this one. "Th-that means I-I can w-walk next to you…r-right?"

"Of course," I said with a smile.

"Th-thank you. I-I'll try not to slow you down."

"Yeah, that's hard even for my family. I have a naturally quick gait, but…" I smiled, "I'll slow down the pace as best as I can for you."

"Y-you don't have to do…something so unnecessary. It—"

"It's fine," I told her. "Come on," I turned around and encouraged her to follow me.

The two of us walked straight up to the front steps of Hope's Peak Academy and then veered left to go to the gymnasium where the entrance ceremony was supposed to start. When we got there the place was…pretty empty. Schools in my hometown never really had entrance ceremonies, but…was this the entire student body? Hope's Peak Academy was huge, so why the hell were there less than 100 students currently in attendance?

The bleachers were folded up and chairs were spread out across the gymnasium. There were still plenty of open seats. The lights were also off in preparation for the ceremony. I looked around, finally spotting two chairs on the right hand side in the middle of an empty row. "Come on, we'll sit there."

"Okay!" I couldn't see it because she was behind me, but based on her enthusiasm, I could guess Mikan was smiling. Her footsteps were encouraging knowing that she was still behind me. If she's single without an arranged marriage, she's totally going to be my girlfriend, I thought to myself. The two of us sat together, eventually with other students piling in alongside, behind and in front of us. Some of them were wearing Hope's Peak uniforms, so that clearly meant they were upperclassmen, my senpais. I didn't pay them any mind, I simply watched the stage as a man with short, spikey hair took the stage, Hope's Peak Academy's Headmaster: Jin Kirigiri. Or, I guess I should call him Headmaster Kirigiri.

He stepped up to the podium and clacked a stack of papers in front of him. He adjusted the microphone and then spoke clearly into it to all of us. "Greetings students and welcome Class 77 of Hope's Peak Academy. For those of you that don't know, I am Jin Kirigiri, the headmaster of Hope's Peak Academy. At this school…"

As Headmaster Kirigiri began to talk about school regulations, I zoned out. It's a bad habit of mine, ADHD and all that. Mine is a pretty mild case though, I just have focusing issues every now and again, plus I can talk a mile a minute when I get…excited. While I still heard Headmaster Kirigiri talk, my gaze shifted away from the stage in the dark. I instead looked around at the gymnasium around me. It was pretty big for a gym with so few students in attendance. I couldn't make out shapes of anyone in the dark and my gaze eventually settled upon Mikan.

I could see her timid gaze staring towards Headmaster Kirigiri, hands placed neatly on her skirt. She really was cute. I inspected her ears and hands. From what I could tell, no rings or jewelry. She seemed very ordinary, which was nice. Extravagance sometimes lowered a woman's charm if they couldn't pull it off. She wasn't even wearing a necklace. I was tempted to make a move by sliding my hand on her leg or her shoulder. I can be a bit daring when I want to be, but I chickened out. A girl like her…I was probably better of leaving her alone. Her self-esteem seemed pretty in the gutter, but I bet she could scream really loud. I turned my head away from her quickly before she noticed I was looking at her. I didn't want her to get the wrong idea.

I focused again on Headmaster Kirigiri. Good thing too. He was saying something important. "…your homeroom teacher will hand out school uniforms to all of you. They are optional, but we hope that you take pride in the school you attend. At this school, for those of you still unaware, classes are optional. Hope's Peak is not like most academies. We prefer for the talents of our youth to shine and grow. We prefer that talent is polished over menial academics. As long as you pass your practical exams once a year, the learning curriculum for this school is nothing for you, our Ultimate students, to worry about. Attendance to class is not mandatory, neither is sitting in on your assigned homeroom."

Wait a second, I thought. So, no classes, no lectures, no tests except one practical exam a year? This is gonna be awesome!

After that, Headmaster Kirigiri just went on and on about school policies and what not. I didn't pay it any mind. I'm a good student. Besides, I'd read most of this in the student handbook that came with my acceptance letter. You could boil down any student handbook rules into pretty much one sentence: Don't be a dick! As long as you behave like a model citizen, you're not likely to get in any trouble. And in spite of the "no mandatory attendance policy" I figured I would at least attend the first bell just so I could feel organized. It's how I was raised: never be late for an appointment. I decided I would always start my day at my homeroom. But…what was my homeroom again? I think it was 77-A. At least, that's what I remember it saying on my acceptance letter and dorm room assignment.

Ah yeah, I almost forgot, this school has on-campus dorm rooms. Singles even. They're fully furnished, but I don't think I'll use mine very much. I still love my family and my mom doesn't cook for the good of her health. If nothing else I might hang out in it if I have something to do mid-day. Regardless, I remember the key to my assigned room saying 77-A on the keychain it was attached to. I currently had that and an attendance form on me shoved into my vest. It's chilly today for April. So I've been wearing a red vest over my favorite, lucky shirt: a picture of two dueling dragons, a red and a blue on, on a black background. I bought it at Universal Studios. It was a size too big when I first got it, but it fits me perfectly now. In the pocket of my vest I had my attendance record and in my right side pocket of my jeans, I had my dorm room key.

After talking our ears off for what seemed like forever, but what had only been approximately eighty minutes, I filed out of the auditorium, almost paying Mikan no mind, but promising to see her later offhandedly. I was focused more on the contradiction staring me in the face.

On my student record form, Class 77-B was printed at the top, but the key in my pocket clearly had 77-A on it. On my first day, really? I thought, frowning in annoyance. I sighed and headed for the admissions office.

I walked up to the front desk, seeing the secretary sitting behind it. "E-excuse me," I said timidly. "I…"

"Hey," a calm, much less intimidated voice echoed through the hall as its owner walked right by me. He was wearing a green hoodie and had white hair that really looked like it needed both a trim and some taming. Seriously, when does this guy get his hair cut. "Pardon the intrusion," he said politely to the secretary, leaving me forgotten. "But I'm afraid I'm having a bit of an issue. Both my student record and acceptance letter didn't say what class I'm in. I talked to a couple of students and they're supposed to be in Class A or B. Which one am I in?"

"Ah, I'm having a similar issue," I said, finally finding my voice. "M-my student record says Class B at the top, but all of my other papers say Class A."

The secretary accepted both mine and the other student's records. She tapped away at the keyboard for a short while. I then looked at the guy that walked into the admissions office with me. He had gray eyes and a demeanor that made him seem like a rather calm and composed individual, harmless even.

"Oh, and who are you? I thought we only had one foreigner at the school in this class, wasn't expecting two."

Another foreigner? There's someone else here not from Japan aside from me. Perhaps he or she speaks English.

"I'm Nagito Komaeda. I'm Hope's Peak Academy's Ultimate Lucky Student."

"Oh, so you won the raffle." Of the few things I knew about Hope's Peak before attending, I knew about the country wide raffle they held to welcome the luckiest student out of thousands to attend the academy.

"Yup, that's me. So, what's your talent?"

"O-oh? M-me? I-I'm the Ultimate Storyteller. My name's Alex. Alex Goldrose."

"Storyteller, huh? That's an interesting talent."

"Oh, you think?" I was getting a little embarrassed. I never thought of myself as that great.

"Mister Komaeda?" The secretary said.

"Yes?" Nagito turned towards the secretary.

"You are class assignment B. Sorry for the trouble. There was a misprint."

"Oh, I see, a misprint. I thought so. My dorm room key says Class B, so I thought that might be the case, but I thought I should come down here to check anyway. Sorry for the trouble."

"What about me?" I asked.

"Mr. Goldrose, apparently your paperwork was filed improperly thanks to the part on the forgetfulness of my associate that filled our Mr. Komaeda's paperwork."

You're kidding, I thought.

"One moment, I'll call the headmaster and see what he wants to do about this."

Doesn't that just mean I'm Class A, I thought.

"Well, while we're waiting, why don't you tell me a story?" Nagito asked.

"Um…" Kind of putting me on the spot aren't you?

"Come on, if you're the Ultimate Storyteller then you should be able to tell me a story off the top of your head right. Maybe one filled with hope?"

What's this guy's deal all of a sudden? Still…like a comedian, anywhere is my stage. I cleared my throat. "S-so, here's something from my own experiences. When I was in sixth grade I took an exam of advanced level math. Apparently my math skills at the time were equivalent to that of the ningth grade level."

"Huh? And you're not the Ultimate Mathematician. That's kind of weird," Nagito said, sounding a bit confused.

"Well I…"

"Excuse me, Mr. Goldrose?"

"Hmm?" I looked at the secretary.

"Due to our filing error, the Headmaster is willing to let you attend either class as it suits you. Given the paperwork error, you're actually listed on both student rosters."

"Oh, wonderful," I said sarcastically.

"Well, why don't we check out Class B," Nagito said. "As long as there's an empty seat, you could sit in my class. I mean, it's one less person you have to get used to right."

He's a bit strange, but he seems like a good guy, a bit like myself even. "Aww, what the hey? Why not?"

Nagito laughed. "Then it's settled. Thanks Ms. Hishikawa."

"Any time, boys. Have a good day."

On the way to Class 77-B, I told Nagito another story, this one fantastical about a princess and a dragon and the knight destined to rescue her. Unfortunately, I barely got past the prologue when we got to our destination.

"You can finish the story another time," Nagito said. "Come on, let's go in."

"Doesn't mean I'm staying," I said. "I mean, if you have a full class I'll have to go to Class A."

"Well no harm in taking a look," Nagito said. He slid open the door. Inside there were fourteen other students, thirteen sitting down, one up at the board. There was a gentleman sitting in the corner of the room looking at the student up at the board. He was dressed sharply with a fedora hat and blond hair. There were three empty seats in the room, but they were barely a passing thought at the moment. After all, in the classroom. I saw her.

She looked at me with unexpected surprise, but then quickly averted her gaze. It didn't matter. I knew it was her just from her expression.

I'm staying, I thought.

"Pardon the intrusion," Nagito said, laughing it off. "We had a little mishap in the admissions office. Sorry we're late."

"That's all right. You boys can take a seat where you'd like, but Miss Nevermind's seat is the one right off to your left there, so if you could take a seat elsewhere."

"Sure, no problem."

Miss Nevermind? I looked straight ahead of me to see a girl with long blonde hair standing up at the board. She was decisively not Japanese. So she's the other foreigner, huh? I thought.

"Welcome to our classroom," she said politely. Her voice was so full of energy. "I will re-introduce myself to you two. I am Sonia Nevermind, the Ultimate Princess from the nation of Novoselic."

Try fitting that on a business card, I thought, chuckling to myself at my clever comment.

Princess Nevermind gestured to the inside of the room. "Please, take a seat where you would like."

Nagito and I dispersed and I beat him to the seat closer to Mikan. It happened to be right behind her. I wanted to talk to her straightaway, but I thought it would be rude to interrupt a woman of Princess Nevermind's caliber.

"I am very much looking forward to being your classmate this year," she said. Her Japanese was perfect without any roughness to it, unlike mine. "Please if you need anything, do not hesitate to ask for my assistance. A princess must listen to all of her subjects' needs."

What kind of talent is princess? I found myself thinking. Isn't that just a status?

Sonia continued to talk for a couple more minutes, stating things about her country's history and even speaking a few words in her native language. It sort of blipped out of my brain, but it was nice just to hear such a pleasant voice speak. After she was done talking, she bowed out gracefully and returned to her seat.

"Let's see, would one of our late attendees like to introduce themselves next to make up for disturbing the class?" My teacher asked. His name was on the board with an arrow pointing to it: Kizakura if I was reading the characters correctly.

"Oh, I suppose I'll volunteer then," Nagito said. He stepped in front of the board and wrote his name on it. "My name is Nagito Komaeda. I'm this year's charity case." A few of the students snickered. "I'm the Ultimate Lucky Student. I have exceptional luck. I don't think it's a very good talent, but apparently the school thinks otherwise."

"Would you care for a demonstration of your luck, Mr. Komaeda?" Kizakura-sensei asked.

"Aww, do I have to?" Nagito asked, sounding modest. He seemed like a very relaxed person that hardly took anything seriously.

What a nice guy, I found myself thinking.

"You don't have to, but…" Kizakura-sensei said.

"Well…since you asked so nicely, why not?" Nagito took out a yen coin and played heads or tails a few times. He got it three times in a row, but on the fourth one the coin hit one of the lights and almost hit him in the eye on its return trip. Nagito laughed. "As you can see, my luck runs out eventually. Sometimes, a wave of bad luck precedes a wave of good luck or vice versa. It's like getting food poisoning from a candy bar only to win a sweepstakes with the ticket inside."

That's…a bit extreme, I found myself thinking.

"Anyway, I suppose that'll do it for my introduction. Why don't you come up here next, Alex? I'm sure your introduction will be far more impressive than my own." On the walk over, Nagito had started calling me by my first name. "I wouldn't want to embarrass a foreigner with language barriers. You don't mind, do you?" He had nothing to worry about of course. The less honorifics I had to use here the better.

As Nagito returned to his seat, I stood in front of the class. It was at that moment that I got a good look at my classmates. Putting Mikan, Sonia and Nagito aside, I did my best to look at the strangers in the classroom. My fellow students seemed…animated for lack of a better word. Their appearances stuck out like sore thumbs. Except for the redhead. She seemed pretty normal to me. The buzz cut blond kid in the back left-hand corner of the room seemed pretty normal too if he didn't rudely have his feet up on his desk. The dark-skinned girl in the back was really hot though. Seriously, I didn't even know boobs could get that big.

"What's the matter, got cold feet?" A short blonde with twin tails asked me. She was sitting right next to the red head.

"N-no…just…" I took a deep breath and smiled my best. "I'm just taking into account how unique my classmates are. I haven't met you all yet and back home everyone just kinda looked the same."

"Well what do you expect from a class of Ultimates?" Nagito asked. "Of course we're gonna stick out." His enthusiasm was a bit reassuring.

I cleared my throat. Right then, I turned my back to my class, glancing back only once to make sure no one was arming a spit ball or anything like that. Incidentally my gaze fell upon Mikan's face briefly. Turning back to the board to hide my blush, I began writing my name on the board.

"My name," I said, my accented Japanese dialect seeping through. "Is Alex Goldrose. In English, you would spell I like this." I wrote my name in English below the katakana used to spell my name. "I'm the Ultimate Storyteller."

"Storyteller, huh?" One of the two fat guys in the class said, though this was the chef dressed one. "Anything…interesting?"

The way he said indicated his true intentions. I didn't let it get to me. Japan gonna Japan, I thought. Never thought I'd run into an anime-level pervert in real life.

"Why don't you tell the whole class that story you were telling me in the hallway?" Nagito asked.

"I don't know if we have time for a story like that…" I said. I didn't know how long introductions were for each student.

"Take all the time you need. We're not going anywhere anytime soon," Kizakura-sensei said.

Just what the hell kind of school is this? I thought, smiling nervously. Nevertheless, it seemed like I had nothing to lose. So, I took a deep breath and began to tell my story. "Imagine a world, where everything tastes like chicken." I then took a dramatic pause. "Welcome to Earth."

I…did get the reaction I expected. Aside from one girl in my class with indescribably crazy hair going, "Woo-yeah," everyone else seemed kind of uninspired. A few chuckled, but I guess comedy isn't really my strong suit after all.

I laughed nervously. "Right, that wasn't the story, just a harmless little warm up. Forget I said it." I then cleared my throat and began to tell the real story. "In a faraway kingdom on a planet like our own, but not our own, there was a princess locked away in the tower. She was guarded by a great and powerful fire-breathing dragon. But unlike most stories this dragon had not kidnapped her for want of being evil, or personal gain. In fact, he had not kidnapped her at all. The dragon was a wise being and when the princess' kingdom had fallen, he took over the castle. The two were friends of a certain nature. He cooked for her and told her stories of other kingdoms that he had visited.

"Word spread quickly of this dragon and princess pair and like most stories, it got twisted in transition. Eventually, knights began to storm the castle in an attempt to rescue the princess. The dragon protested against the knights, but they would not listen, thinking him cunning and wicked."

Already I could see Mikan getting emotional, as if praying for things to work out all right between the princess and the dragon. One of my other classmates in a hoodie, who I was only now noticing had been playing a videogame, looked up at me, interested. All eyes were on me and I was starting to sweat, but I didn't let it bother me and just continued to exposit.

"Multiple kingdoms attacked the dragon and soon a moat dyed in blood surrounded the kingdom. No knight had surpassed the dragon's might and each fell to his fangs, claws and deadly fire breath. Years passed and princess was starting to ripen into a fine woman of twenty-seven. The dragon was also starting to weaken. Surrounded by blood and corpses, and having to constantly defend the princess from danger, he became sickly. His bright green scales turned white and fur began to appear on his scales. After years of assault, it seemed he would eventually expire."

The blond with his feet on the desk put them down. Even he was now listening intently.

"And then, a young knight appeared. He had just graduated from his duties as a squire. He was not the bravest of knights, nor the fiercest or the most intelligent, but he had a big heart and a gentle soul. He heard that the dragon could speak, which meant he could be reasoned with. Determined, he set off for the castle, not for the princess' hand and not to slay the dragon, but for the absolute truth regarding the two.

"When the young knight arrived at the castle, he saw all of the corpses, charred and bleeding strewn about. He did not let that deter him and he pressed onward, breaching the bridge and entering the marketplace. He saw naught but empty, closed stores. No one lived in this kingdom anymore…not after the fall. The princess was the only survivor.

"Twas not long before the dragon found the young knight and landed in front of him. Although he was old, weakened and sickly, he was still plenty powerful for one mere human. 'Human', the dragon said," I said as I deepened my voice to speak as the dragon. "Knights far and wide have come here to slay me and rescue the princess. You are just one man. What makes you think you can accomplish what an army cannot?"

"Mighty dragon,' the knight said," I said, using my natural speaking voice to give voice to the knight, "I am but a humble knight seeking naught but the truth. I am aware you could kill me very easily, but I am not here to do battle.' The knight cast his blade aside and got down on one knee. 'I have heard you are old and starting to weaken. This kingdom is the princess' home, but when you perish, she will have no one. Your hands are stained with so much blood. It is likely that no one will see you as anything, but a monster.' The knight looked the dragon in the eye. 'But I have a bright future ahead of me. I promise to protect the princess with everything I can, if you would allow it.'"

"She has lost all of her innocence," I said, resuming the dragon voice.

"That does not matter to me," I said, as the knight. "If you will not relinquish the princess peacefully, then I will go. I have no wish to bring myself to an early grave.' The dragon snorted and lifted his head far higher than the young knight could reach. 'You are wise, young knight. This secret test that I have posed to all who have come to take the princess, you are the one with the correct answer. I will wake her from her current slumber and I will see to it that you leave together. You have my blessing, young knight. Please take care…of my only friend.' Like that, the dragon flew off to wake the princess. As she descended from her bedroom to meet the young knight out in the market, the dragon used the last of his life force to rid the land of blood and corpses and then faded from existence. The princess and the knight looked at each other, both mourning for the dragon. Gripping the princess' hand tight, the knight escorted her out of her fallen, ruined kingdom and to his homeland. And the two would live…" I paused momentarily to see if anyone wanted to say it with me, but sadly, no one did, "Happily ever after." I bowed. "The end."

I got a round of applause from the entire class, some out of enthusiasm, others out of just common courtesy. Mikan, in particular, was sobbing, "That was so moving! That was such a good story!" she sobbed.

Nagito was smiling widely. "What a wonderful story, filled with hope overcoming despair."

I looked at my other classmates. There was a girl with gray hair and glasses with her eyes shut tight. She seemed to be trying not to cry. I looked at Princess Nevermind. She was smiling widely as she clapped. The others didn't seem to have terribly remarkable or moved expressions, but I was happy just to have their applause. I guess I really do have a knack for this, I thought.

"Okay, you can sit down now," Kizakura-sensei told me.

"Ah, thank you," I said and took my seat.

"Next volunteer," Kizakura-sensei requested.

The next person to get up in front of the class was a guy jacked to high heaven. What's he gonna be, SHSL Wrestler? SHSL Bodybuilder?

In a deep, thundering voice, my classmate wrote his name on the board. "My name is Nekomaru Nidai! I am the Ultimate Team Manager!"

Team Manager? I thought. A guy that buff? What did he do, decide directing sports was more fun than playing them?

"Who can tell me what the three most important actions in the morning are?" Nekomaru demanded out of the class. No one said a word. "Hey! I'm asking a question here!"

Mikan timidly answered. "U-um…sh-showeri—"

"Wrong!" Nekomaru bellowed.

"Eek!" Mikan squeaked in terror.

"It's having a healthy breakfast! Doing wake-up morning exercises and TAKING A GOOD SHIT!"

Did he really have to scream that last part?

After that Nekomaru began to go on and on about managing sports and how good he was at it. I…hate sports. I think athletes are over payed and overrated. I used to play hockey in elementary school as the goalie, but my reflexes dulled and I couldn't play shut out games anymore, so I devoted my time to my studies.

Nekomaru continued his speech in his loud, boisterous voice to the point where I wanted to ask him if he wanted some cheese with his hammy performance. However, I kept my mouth shut.

After Nekomaru finished, the next person to get up on stage was the really big-titted dark-skinned chick from the back of the room. And holy cow they were bigger close up. How the hell did they stay in her shirt? I wondered.

"The name's Akane Owari," she said, writing her name with the most crude katakana I'd ever seen. "I'm the Ultimate Gymnast…I guess."

She guesses? Shouldn't she know? …wait, gymnast? Not with those puppies!

The more Akane talked, the more she seemed to just be a pretty face. Her intellect was in the gutter. The blood knight tendencies she was exhibiting didn't help my impression of her either. Overall, pretty to look at, but not my first choice. Still, if things didn't work out with Mikan, I could certainly do worse. She was probably the most well-endowed girl in the class, if not the school.

After Akane sat down, the next person to stand in front of the class was a very strangely dressed man. He had a scarf around his neck, wore two yellow earrings and apparently had heterochromia. He also had lightning bolt shaped paint going down his left eye. He was dressed in all black and his hair…well…I'd seen less weird in anime to be sure.

"My fellow students," his voice was probably how one would picture the devil himself speaking. "Remember my name well," she said. He picked up a piece of chalk and wrote his name on the board nice and big with unnecessary flair. "I AM GUNDHAM TANAKA! I am the man who will one day rule this world!"

Almost all of us in the class had expression of, "Is this guy for real?" written on our faces.

"I see you all are in disbelief of my abilities! Then behold, my pride and joys! GO MY FOUR DARK DEVAS OF DESTRUCTION!"

When four hamsters came crawling out of his clothing, I couldn't take it anymore. I planted my face into my desk and burst out laughing.

"You there!" Gundham barked. "Wizard of Words! You dare mock me? Shall we draw weapons and battle?"

I gulped. Uh oh, I made him mad. Then again…I should've expected this. If there was one thing I feared a lot…it was getting my ass kicked. Whether Gundham's explosive behavior was silly or not, and it was, guy still looked like he could kick my ass. Plus, hamsters bit really hard.

I stood up from my seat and bowed in apology. "I-I'm sorry for making fun of you, but…" I stood up and scratched my cheek, "do you mind toning it down a little…you're…kind of weirding us all out."

"I think he's wonderful!" Princess Nevermind exclaimed, her eyes sparkling. "Go on Tanaka-san. Continue." She stood up and cast her hand down, palm open, "Alex, please be seated."

No honorifics for me? Either she's doing the same thing as Nagito…or she hates me right about now.

I obeyed as Princess Nevermind requested and sat back down. Gundham then continued. "As I was reciting before I was mocked and interrupted," Gundham said, sending a glare my way. I winced. "I am Gundham Tanaka, this world's future ruler, but for now, consider me Hope's Peak Academy's Ultimate's Breeder."

…okay that explains the hamsters. So…what…he looks into pedigrees? I wonder if he raises things besides hamsters.

"My fellow kin and rivals, how many of you are masters of the dark arts?" Everyone seemed to grow quiet. Gundham became disturbed. "Not a one of you? Do you dislike the animal kingdom that greatly?"

"Ohhhhh, I get it," Nagito suddenly said. "I think he's asking if any of us have ever had any pets."

"Ohhhhhhh," we all said collectively. My hand shot up into the air along with Princess Nevermind's, Nekomaru's, the blond boy whose name I didn't yet know, and the brunette with the bat hoodie and the portable game station.

"I see, so some of you are masters after all. I shall go around the room and assess your skills myself. I am the proud owner of no less than twenty-seven units, all of which their combined might shoots up to three thousand magic points! You there, Wizard of Words, what is your summon called?"

Wizard of Words? Is that what I am to him? Well…I guess if I want to apologize, I should probably humor the guy. "Lo…" Whoops, almost spoke in English for a moment. I stood up and played Gundham's game to the best of my ability. "Tanaka-sama, I am but the owner of one simple summon." I thrust my arm out in front of me, palm spread. "My young feline companion of two years now. She is a Bengal Tabby! Her name is Selina!"

"A-A Bengal Tabby?" Gundham stuttered. He sounded impressed. "I see…I dreadfully underestimated you, Wizard," he said, folding his arms. "Still, one Bengal of two years, is hardly a feat. Thirty points. From whence did you procure her?"

"Um…from a shelter. She was a surrender case."

"I see, so you have a soft spot for the weak. Fifty points then. You may be seated, Wizard, but mark my words," Gundham adjusted his scarf with his bandaged left arm, "this is not the last time we will do battle!"

Ooookay, I can tell he's going to be a lively and strange one…jeez how did this guy get through public schooling with an attitude like that and not get picked on?

"You there!" Gundham bellowed at the blond boy. "What is your summon?"

"I've got a dog. A Shikoku Inu. His name is Kira. My dad named him." The blond kid made a fist. "And he'd fuck your hamsters up any day!"

Okay, who pissed in his cereal this morning and are we really letting language like that in this classroom?

"Hah! Merely a bluff! For you see, this is but their sleeping form! A mere canine is no match!"

"The fuck did you just say?" the blond boy bellowed.

"All right, that's enough, sit down Kuzuryu-kun." He seemed to be referring to the blond boy. Kuzuryu sat down.

"And you, mighty warrior, what is your summon's name?"

"I've got a dog too!" Nekomaru exclaimed. "Good ol' Boomerang. She's a Shiba Inu."

"Yet another canine. Still, I admire your devotion as masters. A full one hundred points to both of you."

Well…his ranking system is a bit strange.

"Yeah, whatever," Kuzuryu grumbled.

"And you, Electric Witch, what can you conjure?"

The girl that spoke had a very soft voice. I watched her pull up something on screen. "I don't know if it counts, but I raise Tamagachi and play virtual pet games." She pulled her hoodie up. "I don't own any real life pets. My parents won't let me."

"Bah! Mere trivialities. But I admire your attempts to be an apprentice. I am certain you will find a summon worthy to call your own on the mortal plane one day."

The girl smiled. "I hope so too."

"And now for you, Queen of Darkness, what do you possess?" Gundham asked Princess Nevermind.

"Well…" Princess Nevermind began listing names of pets she owned and from what I could tell was naming the species in perfect Latin. I didn't know what she was talking about, but apparently Gundham did and he looked baffled. "C-cease your tongue, lying she-cat! You claim to own all these creatures?"

Princess Nevermind smiled. "They all live in the Novoselic Royal Garden."

Gundham began to sweat a little. "Such power…it is unheard of. You…you are not human. You are definitely a low-ranking demon! Only a demon could possess power that could rival my own!"

"Oh, I'm flattered, truly," Princess Nevermind said with a sweet smile.

"Y-yes…w-well," Gundham said, seeming nervous, "That concludes my presentation." He bowed gracefully. "Thank you very much." The Four Dark Devas then jumped on his back and all posed and bowed before digging back into Gundham's clothes as he took his seat.

I don't know what I find weirder, his hamsters or his behavior.

Without skipping a beat, the pink haired guy in the class took to the stage. "Th-the name's K-Kazuichi Soda. I'm the Hope's Peak Academy Mechanic of Ultimate." Okay, my Japanese wasn't the best and even I realized he fucked it up. "Gah! I said it backwards." He turned around and frantically wrote his name on the board, realizing he hadn't done so. "Uh…r-right s-so l-like I said, m-my name is Kazuichi Soda."

Wait, that's actually his name? I didn't realize I was snickering and I wasn't the only one. The blonde with the twin tails next to me was doing it too. I tried to quiet down, but she kept laughing and I wound up not being able to squelch it.

"H-hey! Wh-what the hell is so funny?" Soda demanded.

"You mean besides the fact that you botched your introduction and your last name is the name of a beverage?" the blonde cackled.

"H-hey, I like my last name. Screw you!"

At that exact moment I stopped laughing, but not because I didn't think Soda's…no Kazuichi's last name was funny. The way he had barked back at the blonde. It…sounded how I used to bark at people…the day I learned to stand on my own. Bully victim, I thought. The guy must've been trying to reinvent himself. It would explain the pink hair. I had no right to pick on someone like that. I simply shut my mouth and sat up straight in my seat.

Unfortunately, the blonde didn't cease her antics. "Is your mommy's name Coke or Pepsi?"

"Hey! You shut up! Just shut your mouth!"

"All right, that's enough Saionji-chan!"

"It's Hiyoko!" the blonde barked.

Hiyoko Saionji, huh? I wondered. I took a deep breath. I'd better keep an eye on her. She was short, but she was feisty. And she had the makings of a real bully, like Angelica Pickles, but so much older.

"A-anyway, like I said I'm the Ultimate Mechanic. If anything needs fixing like a car, an AC, or dishwasher, I'm your guy. I invent things too. My dream is to build a rocket ship from complete scratch."

Guy dreams big…well, I looked over at Gundham, In a rational way. I should probably try to get on this guy's good side, might save my folks a lot of electrical bills in the long run.

Kazuichi went on and on about mechanical jargon that didn't make sense to me before taking his seat. After he sat down, Kuzuryu, the blond kid from earlier, got up to talk. "Right, so like Kizakura-sensei said earlier, the name's Kuzuryu, Kuzuryu Fuyuhiko. I'm the Ultimate Yakuza!"

…Oh fuck. I could feel my entire body trembling in its seat. A true and tried Yakuza? I was practically classmates with a death dealer. Boyish face or not, fucking with those guys was not an option. Gundham, you have stoooooones! I exclaimed, remembering how he pissed Kuzuryu off earlier.

"If anyone makes a wisecrack in this class about my height or how I look, I'll be sure to make them sorry. I don't give a fuck about any of you motherfuckers. This whole school to me is nothing, but a way to for me to cement my status as heir to the Kuzuryu clan. And if any of you bastards get in my way, I'll show you what businessmen like me do to scumbags like you. Got it?"

"Yes, sir!" I exclaimed.

"Well, listen to that, a mongrel that knows his place."

I gulped. Please don't cut my fingers off, I sweated.

Kuzuryu grinned in a very unsettling way. "Just for that, you get a freebee the first time you cross me. I'll remember this respect, gaijin."

I nodded vehemently. Strangely, I was the only one. Was no one else scared of this guy? He was a mafia kid. One false move and he'd have all our heads and not even the school's awesome security system could do anything about it. I suspected at least Mikan to be scared like me, but she wasn't even flinching. Still, I didn't think my actions were wrong, at least, not from my viewpoint. If only Miaka was here, I thought. Miaka was my old pen pal from the fourth grade. She lived in Japan, but…fat chance of her being here. I mean, she is a pretty talented cosplayer, but Ultimate? I didn't think that was likely. My luck isn't Nagito's.

After Kuzuryu sat down, the next person to stand and talk was Mikan herself. Her hand shook as she wrote her name on the board. "U-um…I-I'm M-Mikan T-Tsumiki th-the Ultimate Nurse. U-um…i-if anyone gets sick, I promise to nurse them back to health to the best of my ability. S-so please…I-I hope we can all get along."

To ease Mikan, I tried smiling kindly, hoping she was looking right at me. She was either too nervous to notice or to care. "U-um…" she continued. "I…I've actually administered shots before. A-and I know th-thirty-three ways to cure the common cold. U-um…" she looked worried. "I-I don't have a demonstration l-like e-everyone else s-so…"

"That's all right, Tsumiki-chan. You can sit down," Kizakura-sensei told her.

Seriously, show the poor thing mercy.

Mikan sat down and looked at timid as ever. "Hey," I whispered to her. "You were fine up there."

"U-um…y-you think so?"

I nodded. My words seem to brighten Mikan up. She actually smiled. I blushed. Her smile was…so cute. Oh if only I could've seen that smile for longer. It was short lived as Hiyoko got up to talk.

"So like you guys have probably figured out by now, my name is Hiyoko Saionji, but I prefer you guys all call me Hiyoko. I don't want to be associated with my family name, got it?"

Short and short-tempered, got it, I thought.

"My talent is traditional dancing, hence my glorious kimono," she said, doing a twirl. She then threw her arms up into the air and spread her arms wide. "I also like to squish things, like Mikan's face."

"Wh-what?" Mikan blurted out in a mess of tears. Her outburst drowned out the sound of me pounding my fist against my desk.

Must…resist…urge…to punch her. It was clear, this little blonde brat was a straight up bully. And I was not going to let her stand there and insult a girl as innocent as Mikan like that. Kazuichi was one thing, but with Mikan that was a line I felt I wouldn't let anyone cross.

"So I guess that's that I suppose. I don't exactly have room to do a routine in here with the room so cramped like this."

"That's fine, Hiyoko-chan, you can take your seat," Kizakura-sensei told her.

"Sure thing, sensei." Hiyoko went and sat down.

"My turn!" The girl with the really weird hair style exclaimed and got up in front of the class. I just stared blankly. It's like Ryuko Matoi and Stocking Anarchy had a baby, I thought.

"Howdy!" The girl exclaimed and wrote her name on the board. "Normally Ibuki does a little intro for her name, which she likes so much, but since Kizakura-sensei asked me to write my name on the board, I'll just come out and say it for those of you that can't read. Ibuki is Ibuki as in Ibuki Mioda! It's nice to meet you all!"

Cute name, I thought. …Wait a second, haven't I heard that name before?

"Meoooow!"

I had to do a double take. What? I had no idea where that came from.

"Ibuki is the Ultimate Musician! Ibuki's favorite instrument is the guitar! And while's going solo right now," Ibuki pointed her hands like guns towards us all, "She's totally down for a new band member. Auditions accepted at any time!"

Huh, a genuine third person talker and, wow, her personality and fashion sense DO not match.

Ibuki thrust her arm high into the air. "Ibuki would be happy to give anyone a private concert in the music room at any time. She's pretty much gonna eat, sleep and breathe there." Ibuki posed with a V-sign over her face, a sparkle appearing in her one open eye. "And I do mean anyone."

Right, so she swings both ways. Not very subtle, is she?

"Right then, this concludes Ibuki's introduction! Nice to have metcha!" She then hummed to herself and went to sit down.

"Well, Nanami-chan, you're the only one left," Kizakura-sensei said. No one answered him. "Nanami-chan."

"One second." It was the girl with the bat hoodie and the game station.

Jeez, and my parents said I'm obsessed. Also, I guess that means I missed the others.

Nanami put her game away and then walked up to the chalkboard. She wrote her name on the board in rather blocky katakana. It must've been the gaming influence. "My name is Chiaki Nanami. I'm the Ultimate Gamer.I like all games across all genres, even the bad ones."

Remind me to introduce her to Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde and we'll see just how true that statement is.

"But, personally speaking, I like mostly retro games, consoles that are at least two generations behind the leading market. If you neglect the classics, you're neglecting everything that brought you what you love now. At least…that's how I see it."

…I feel like all of my Xbox Gamerscore isn't worth shit anymore. That was far deeper than anything I could say about gaming.

She looked at Kizakura-sensei. "May I sit down now?"

"No need. That concludes introductions. I'll come around and collect everyone's papers and you guys can come back to the class at your leisure to fill out some forms. I'll see you all around." He took out a flask and removed the cap with his teeth. "Class dismissed." He then began to drink out of it.

Thanks to my mishap with Nagito, we missed the introductions of the others, but I got their names and talents before leaving class: Mahiru Koizumi, the Ultimate Photographer, Teruteru Hanamuta, the Ultimate Chef, Ryota Mitarai, the Ultimate Animator, and Peko Pekoyama, the Ultimate Swordsman. All in all, I felt…fortunate to have been able to sit in on Class 77-B, especially since one of the students was a no show.

Three cute girls and one really hot one all due to a little paperwork hiccup. Since when does my luck work out like that? I wondered. Maybe it's Nagito's influence? I shrugged. Since I had nowhere to be, I figured it would be a god idea for me to go around and introduce myself to the others. And with that, I hoisted my black backpack onto my shoulders and ventured through the school to try and make some friends in a country that didn't know me from a hole in the wall.

FREE TIME

With class dismissed, I thought the first thing I should do was make amends with Kazuichi. To that end, I marched to the school store, purchased a candy bar for 200 yen and went looking for him. With sharp intuition, I found him near his dorm room. He was packing a flatbed up with a whole stockpile of tools and machinery.

"Need a hand?" I asked.

"Huh?" He seemed surprised by my presence.

"You won't do much without a little extra oomph in your system. Probably been a while since you had breakfast and it's way too soon for lunch. Catch." I tossed him the candy bar.

"Uh…thanks?" He said, still confused as he caught. "Er…I can really have this?"

"Yeah, why not?" I shrugged.

Kazuichi shrugged and unwrapped it. "Ikadimasu…I guess." He took a big bite out of it. "Oh man this is great. Thanks, man."

"You're welcome. And," I bowed what I considered low enough to make amends, "sorry…about…earlier."

"Nah, it's cool. People used to make fun of me all the time for it."

"I can imagine," I said, standing up straight. "I'm sure even Hiyoko's comment was nothing new to you."

"Heh…so…why are you suddenly being so nice to me? You were snickering pretty loudly earlier."

I rubbed the back of my head. "I…didn't realize you were also a bully victim trying to reinvent himself. That's why I came to apologize."

"Uh, thanks. I appreciate it." After a brief pause he added. "Wait, what do you mean also?"

"Exactly what it sounds like," I said.

"Damn, you sounded so calm up in front of everyone, even though you're a foreigner." He pushed up the hat on his head and rubbed his hair. "I screwed up my whole introduction."

I laughed a little. "It happens."

"Yeah, but it's even worse when you're trying to impress a girl, you know!"

Oh, I see. He was trying to impress a girl. I bet I know which one. It was a pretty simple answer. Even if this was a videogame and I was presented with three choices, my intuition made the answer pretty obvious. "Princess Nevermind?"

"Eh, how'd you figure that out?"

"Well, you went up right after Tanaka did and she seemed pretty taken by him. I figured you were trying to make a good impression."

"Yeah and I blew it. H-hey, d-do you think I have a shot with her?" Kazuichi asked me honestly.

"Uhhhhh…"

"Oh, I see. You think it's hopeless too, don't you?"

"N-no. G-give me a moment to think," I said. Unfortunately, thinking didn't really change my answer from what Kazuichi just said. Still, if I aimed to be friends with this guy, it was probably best I boosted his spirits a little. "W-well…I think if you're persistent and act like a gentleman, she might come around…maybe."

"Y-you think so?"

I shrugged. "Anything's possible, I suppose."

"Yeah, yeah you're right!" Kazuichi exclaimed and smacked his fist into his open palm. "Right then! I'm not gonna give up! I'm going to make Miss Sonia like me!"

"Okay, you can start by referring to her a tad more respectful than that."

"Huh? Oh, that's right you were late. She gave us all permission to simply call her Miss Sonia. She said she didn't want any barriers between her and her classmates given she's not representing the kingdom of Novoselic and she's just here to learn."

"Oh, that's…interesting," I said.

Kazuichi's eyes began to glow. "Which is why I really think I might have a shot. I can picture it now."

As I saw the look on Kazuichi's face, I could only thank to god this was real life and I wasn't treated to whatever fantasy was rolling around in his mind. "Keep it in your pants, dude. Anyway, want some help lugging all this stuff. Where's this going anyway?"

"Out in the schoolyard," Kazuichi said. "The school can provide me with all the equipment and tools I need. So I'm going to get started on my rocket ship!"

"Well, if I can help out in any way, let me know." I extended my hand for Kazuichi to shake. "I'm afraid I don't understand very much mechanical technical jargon, but I can at least be good for steadying something or handing you tools when you can't exactly walk away for the moment."

"Heh, if I needed that kinda help I wouldn't be the Ultimate Mechanic," Kazuichi chuckled. He shook my hand regardless though. "But hey, if you really wanna help, I'll find a way to make it happen. Hell, you could always get me more supplies or check things for me just to save a little time."

"Sounds good," I said and a friendship was immediately born.

After that I continued to help Kazuichi load his flatbed and helped him push it out into the middle of campus. He told me he could unload it himself since he still needed to plan the foundation and draft up the blueprint. He said I could drop by from time to time and I was free to tell him any stories rolling around in my head. I winked, gave him a friendly slap on the shoulder and returned to the classroom.

When I arrived, I looked at my phone to check the time. There was still some time before I was going to be hungry for lunch. I guess that gave me time to hang with one more of my classmates.

FREE TIME

While I initially thought to go hang out with Mikan, I was…nervous. I didn't want to overwhelm the poor girl immediately after meeting her. Not to mention when I poked my head into the nurse's office, she didn't seem to be there and I had no idea where to look for her. So, I headed out around campus to look for any of my new classmates. I also decided to get a good feel for the campus. It was really big. Even my middle school campus, which was already pretty big, wasn't as green and extravagant as Hope's Peak Academy.

After wandering around for a while, I found Chiaki sitting on a bench in front of the school fountain. She had this tranced look on her face like she was really engrossed in whatever it was she was playing. Curious, I peeked over her shoulder to see what she was up to. It looked like a fantasy RPG and it looked like she was engaged in a boss fight.

"Cool game," I said. Chiaki said nothing and just continued to press buttons accordingly to get her characters to fight. I stayed silent and watched her defeat the enemy monster, which turned out to be a bonus boss of some variety given there was no cutscene afterwards. She then yawned, saved her game and shut off the console.

"Sleepy," she mumbled and then hung her head down. She snored really loudly.

…maybe I should go, I thought. However, no sooner had I tiptoed around the bench, Chiaki bolted awake.

"Oh, Goldrose-kun, hello."

"You can call me Alex, if you want," I said. "Probably best everyone does." Goldrose-kun? Boy she gets familiar with people fast it seems.

"…I see," Chiaki said.

The hell was with that pause.

"Did you want something?"

"Actually I had a question for you, or rather a few questions."

"Go ahead," Chiaki said, continuing to listen.

"You said you liked all games across all genres, even the bad ones. Are you sure about that statement? I know some real stinkers."

"There are no bad games, only bad gamers."

"Even games where the control system is horrendous? I know a game where you have to hit select on an NES controller to do a more powerful move than a wimpy punch."

Chiaki's eyes lit up. "You know about Toxic Crusaders?"

"W-well…I haven't…played it. I just…I've watched a gamer online. He calls himself the Angry Video Game Nerd. He tells gamers not to play certain games because of how bad they are."

"…I see."

Again, what's with that pause?

"I feel gamers are free to choose what games they like and don't like. Gaming is subjective. Not everyone is good at every type of game."

"You didn't exactly answer my question, do you really think there are only bad gamers when the control scheme and hit detection are ridiculous. And what about games that are completely impossible to win because of the coding?"

"…are you having fun?"

"Huh?"

"Gaming isn't about winning or losing, just like sports. If you're having fun in your failures, does it matter if you can win or beat the game?"

I blinked.

"It's true that games, by their very nature, are supposed to be designed to be completed or to obtain a high score if completion is not possible, but we used to be saturated with a market of unfinished, unpolished games."

"Like Takeshi's Challenge?"

Chiaki pulled her hoodie up over her head. "…I don't like to talk about that one."

Seems there are games even Chiaki doesn't like.

"Okay so maybe not all bad games I like." She pulled her hoodie down. "But there are plenty of bad games I find enjoyably flawed, and plenty of bad games where I feel people complain more about the difficulty than trying to actually see that the game isn't impossible."

"Like Ninja Gaiden?"

"Exactly like that," Chiaki said with a smile. "It's hard, but it's not impossible."

"So do you like mainstream franchises?" I asked.

"Of course, why do you ask?" Chiaki asked.

"…are you a Pokémon fan?"

"O-of course I am!" Chiaki exclaimed, getting excited. She stood up immediately. "It's one of my favorites!"

"…this is a longshot, but you wouldn't still happen to have your old save file for the original…well I guess here in Japan it's Red and Green Version."

"I even have my link cable!" Chiaki exclaimed. "Do you want to battle?"

"Er, tomorrow. I don't have my Gameboy on me, unfortunately. Are you sure though? The Ultimate Gamer might meet her match."

Chiaki gave me a competitive look. She even thrust her arm forward, palm outspread. "When it comes to Pokémon, I won't be beaten!"

"Then why don't we meet back here tomorrow at this exact time? We'll see who's the true old school Pokémon Master!"

"Looking forward to it!" Chiaki exclaimed and our eyes met with a competitive stare. I could almost see our clothes transforming in my mind into Pokémon outfits. And, I had to admit, picturing Chiaki dressed as a Pokémon trainer was kind of cute, especially with her face pent up and competitive like that. Guess I found yet another potential girlfriend, I thought.

After our competitive glances ceased, I sat down with Chiaki on the bench discussing the kinds of games we liked and played recently. Well…at least until she decided she wanted to take a nap on the bench. I invited her to lunch, but she declined. She was too tired.

And that was how my first pre-lunch time at Hope's Peak Academy came to a close. With that, I headed for what my student handbook said was the best Cafeteria on campus. Unsurprisingly, Teruteru was making food for the entire school and had been since homeroom was dismissed. A whole buffet spread was laid out. Even non-traditional Japanese food was laid out, including lox. It seemed Teruteru had even made his own cream cheese spread. I loaded up my plate with some home style favorites, and even the chef's recommended choice of beef and potato stew.

As I looked around for a seat though, I had trouble spotting my classmates. Between the 76th and 75th classes of Hope's Peak Academy, finding the dozen or so members of the 77th class I'd just met was rather difficult. I was lost in a sea of school uniforms mixed with brazen attires.

As I wandered through the cafeteria with my loaded tray, suddenly a voice called out to me, one I would recognize anywhere. "Hey, what's the matter? Are you just going to stand there all day until your food gets cold or are you going to find a place to sit?"

I turned sharply to see a girl my age dressed teal jacket and a white tank top. She had white hair, but it had to be a wig since I knew it wasn't her natural hair color or style—she disliked using hair dye. She also had a fake black flower accessory in her hair. She had on a black skirt and boots that came half-way up to her knees. The clothing on her looked a bit unnatural, but only to the trained eye. Anyone passing through wouldn't have taken a second look at her clothes.

But I did and that was only because one last part of this person's attire was throwing off her whole act: her magenta eyes. And I knew that under that white wig there was a head of green hair with a flattened ahoge hiding as well. And how did I know this, because this person was my old pen pal: Miaka Senri.

I almost dropped my tray and settled for setting it aside on an empty table. "Oh my gosh, what are you doing here?" I exclaimed. I ran over to her and raised my arm to try and hug her, only to put it down seconds later. This cafeteria was huge. There were people everywhere. In America, such a greeting would've been okay, but Miaka wasn't anywhere close to being my girlfriend. Rumors would spread like I wouldn't believe if I crossed that line. So, I just rubbed the back of my head and smiled.

Still, Miaka and I went way back, even before she was considered a sensation. Our schools had a pen pal program set up back in the fourth grade and we were randomly chosen out of a hat to be each other's pen pals. We'd been talking and chatting since. It's thanks to Miaka that I even like anime and know most of the videogames I've played. I also have her to blame for the truly bizarre ones.

"I guess you could call me," Miaka said with a smirk, "Miaka Senri, the Ultimate Cosplayer! Now come on, don't just stand there, let's get a table. Follow me."

I followed Miaka towards a table she had her eye on. It was near the window and over looked the campus.

"Communication is a two-way street though. You could've told me you were attending Hope's Peak Academy too."

"Just sort of slipped my mind I guess. Man, when was the last time we spoke to each other? January?"

"I think so, actually. And I don't think we've seen each other's faces in much longer than that," Miaka added.

"Yeah, two years I think." I looked down at her chest. "Still flat I see."

"Oh, you're an asshole," she said, taking a friendly, passing swipe at my head. She then thrust her head into the air. "Dear boy, you have no appreciation for my end of the boob spectrum."

"I really don't," I chuckled. Miaka just grunted in annoyance. "Still doesn't mean I don't appreciate you."

"Whatever." Miaka sat down and pulled over a nearby chair, removing her wig and setting it down upon it. Instantly her ahoge became noticeable, as did her green hair. "Well, sit down, I wanna here how my little gaijin friend is managing to find himself in the Land of the Rising Sun."

"You're funny," I said dryly.

"I know I am," Miaka said with a smile, ignoring my tone of voice and simply taking my words at face value.

I simply grumbled as I sat down. "I've been okay. Starting today I'm the Ultimate Storyteller. But I'm way more curious about you." I leaned forward and smirked, resting my chin against the back of my hand. "When talking to a lady, always give her the floor first. That's one of my rules."

"Yeah, nice try. You're no Godot, but fine. I suppose I'll go first. Okay, Mr. Storyteller, why don't you just sit back and let your old friend Miaka tell you about the day she's had up until now."

"Sure, you have my undivided attention." I then sat back, relaxed and listen to Miaka exposit about her first ever morning at Hope's Peak Academy.

(A/N: And done with chapter one. A bit of an extended introduction, but I promise things are gonna pick up fast. I didn't want to say too much at the beginning, but I try to make my Author Avatar come across how I would respond to situations, even if they're not how I actually feel as a meta perspective. Perfect example: I'm sorry, but if Gundham was a real person I could not take him seriously. As a fictional character though, I think Gundham is a freaking boss! Hiyoko and Mikan though are spot on for how I really feel. In fact, regarding Hiyoko, if I can borrow a line from Gundham, "YOU WILL BURN IN THE FIRES OF PANDEMONIUM!" But then again, who doesn't hate Hiyoko.

The whole point of my avatar, if you couldn't already tell, is that he's supposed to be an American immigrant so while I have to follow Japanese cultural norms, I still think like an American. It makes it easier to maneuver through the story. And since Sonia is a foreigner, no reason they can't have two non-Japanese born students. Of course, this will come with its fair share of complications as you'll see soon enough.

Anyway, please continue reading as this is only the beginning of your therapy session. I've reintroduced you to some friendly faces. Like I said, there's a reason this story is called One Year Ahead, One Mile Behind. We are all Junko's senpais, but none of us actually know what she's up to, so we're a mile behind her in the planning stages, but I have my time to set things on a new historical course to forever prevent her from doing the shit she pulled in canon? Will I succeed, well, as you might've guessed already, I'm not alone. Miaka Senri will take the reins next chapter to show off her class, 77-A. Things are about to get quite interesting. Until then, see you next time).