A/N: Okay, so I know that I said that I probably wouldn't be able to post the sequel until after Christmas, but I wound up with a little extra time to work on it. It's the same college AU as the last one, same characters with a few OC's thrown in for flavor and maybe a few not-yet-introduced familiar faces too. So, a few things to note about this one: Firstly, just like the first story, I've molded these characters like putty to fit my own cracked notions, but it's all in good fun, so just roll with the OOC bits, please; Secondly, unlike the first story - which was entirely Roy's POV - this one switches POV's. It doesn't happen randomly and there are no indicators, but I still make it obvious so I'm pretty sure nobody's gonna get lost; Thirdly, this one may get a little more angsty than the last one; Fourthly and finally, there will be some trigger warnings popping up in later chapters, so keep an eye on those. I should probably also mention that updates will be a bit sporadic. My move date was pushed back, but I am still in the process of moving, so, basically my whole life has devolved into an unending string of chaos and cardboard boxes (and the two damn cats who think those boxes are there for their amusement - cat stew is sounding tastier by the day). More than half of my damn books are packed, so I'm restricted to Google only for my research, and I only have my little French press to make coffee with since the coffee machine is packed too (life has turned very ugly).

This first chapter is basically intros, recaps, and epilogue from the first story. I did this so that this story can be taken as a stand-alone work or as the sequel it's intended to be. So, for those who read the first story, the recaps will at least give you a glimpse of Ed's take on last story's debacles, and the epilogue bits will fill in what happened after all was said and done. There'll be more "what happened next" stuff peppered in other chapters, but most of the salient points are covered in Chapters 1 and 2 (I think). The intros, of course, are for new readers who didn't read the first story, but there are new opinions and such that I hope will keep returning readers amused. Thus ends the world's longest damn author's note.

Disclaimer: Yeah, sort of obvious, but I don't own FMA or any of its characters. I'm just a shameless invader pillaging the genius of others for my own jollies.

Chapter 1

Festivals, Physics, and Penguins

"Ladies and gentleman – of course, using those terms as loosely as humanly possible," said Edward Elric to his gathering class. If he was being honest with himself, he knew he sounded as exhausted as he felt, and no lame attempts at humor could cover that up. Between working in his lab, his part-time job at the nearby diner, and both teaching and attending classes he was completely worn out. And now, Central University's new administrators had seen fit to add a few more side dishes to his already over-full plate. He could still remember the argument he'd just finished losing against his boss, the university's recently hired dean.

"I'm sorry Mr. Elric, but participation this year is mandatory for all faculty," said Dean Grand, his deep voice causing his mustache to vibrate in a way that would be funny if Ed wasn't so pissed. "I understand you got out of it last year when you were asked to sit on the committee, using your research as an excuse. This year there will be no excuses."

"That wasn't an excuse. I have two jobs, plus my research, plus attending classes. I don't have time for this, and even if I did, I'd rather nail my dick to a board covered in barbed wire than participate," growled Ed. "Read the bio, dude. I'm the 'broody antisocial genius' type, not the 'friendly socially acceptable participation' type."

"And look where that's gotten you," said Grand dryly. "You're twenty-two years old Elric, but you don't drink, don't smoke, don't date, and don't go anywhere besides work and school – and most of your work is at school. You're here so much I don't know if I should give you a paycheck or charge you rent. Elric, I hate to break it to you, but you need a life."

"This is why nobody likes you," growled Ed angrily.

"Nonsense, I'll have you know I'm very well liked," said Grand with a facsimile of a personable smile that fooled no one.

"Yeah right," snorted Ed. "Maybe in Antarctica where it's just you and the penguins. I bet the penguins don't like you either."

Ed supposed he should just count himself lucky that he hadn't gotten fired yet. He and the new dean butted heads often. Actually, if he didn't know any better, he'd think that the new dean enjoyed their verbal fencing. Hell only knew he pissed Ed off enough that Ed couldn't help but wonder if he was doing it on purpose. Or maybe Ed was just a little too on edge.

Due to unforeseeable circumstances, he'd ended up moving in with his boyfriend, fellow PhD candidate Roy Mustang. That sexy bastard was surely too good to be true. He was gorgeous, with coal black hair and dark, bottomless almond-shaped eyes set in a moon-pale face. He had a smile that could drop panties at 100 yards, and on top of that he was a brilliant scientist and a smooth talker to boot. The fact that he was good in bed too was a definite bonus. It was actually pretty ridiculous how ostensibly perfect that bastard was. However, Ed also knew the man's flaws, had noted all of his insecurities and idiosyncrasies. All the things Roy never dared show anyone else, he had granted Ed the privilege of viewing. Having that sort of full access to someone who was usually so guarded was a heady experience.

"It's that time of year again, kiddies," Ed told his class with all the enthusiasm of announcing the dissemination of a new plague. "It's time for the Fall Charity Festival. Yay." He said in a flat lifeless tone. "This year things will be a little different. For one, all the faculty and staff have to participate, and that includes me. For another thing, student participation will warrant bonus points in the class of your choice. If any of you are not sure whether you need the bonus points, come see me, and I can give you your current grade as of today. Those of you who I know badly need the points, I will speak with after class. The list of events, booths, and other odd jobs that need warm bodies to fill them will be placed on the board by the door. The sign-up sheet will be by my office door, or you can come talk to me and I'll put your name down. As you know, if I'm not in my office, classrooms, or lecture halls then I don't like any of you enough to act like I know you anywhere else . . . but I guess, I'll make an exception for festival sign-up. I'm usually in the lab if I'm not in my office or class. If you don't have access to the lab building – which I know most of you jokers don't – ask the security guard to call me. He already knows what's what, so he won't argue.

"Now that all that shit's out of the way, let's get on with the learning. As you know we're creeping closer to semester finals, so we've got to finish cramming all this crap in your spongy little brains," segued Ed with a villainous grin, and the students all groaned as one. "So, let's talk entropy . . ."

When class was over, Ed headed toward the Science Department's lab building where his own lab was located, as was Roy's. Ed was in the middle of salvaging the research he had been doing for his doctoral thesis after his lab and office had been trashed by a shady corporation's pet thugs. That break-in had been the start of a ginormous snowball of events that ultimately turned his life upside down. One moment he's despairing over his stolen research notes the and all of his damaged equipment – which wasn't just a setback, it was a whole fucking reset back to the beginning – and the next he was dealing with the return of his estranged father, saving the aforementioned useless sperm donor from a ruthless corporation, preventing the development of a new weapon of mass destruction, rescuing unwilling human experiments, and taking down the questionable corporation's even more questionable CEO just to add a cherry on top. And through it all, Roy and his friends had been right there, helping him and encouraging him and fighting alongside him. He had a lot to be grateful to Roy for, and, though he'd probably never say it out loud, he was glad he'd met the man.

During the process of dealing with that nightmare corporation – Ouroboros, whose money was made by the design and sale of weapons and was maintained by the harassing, kidnapping, and murder of innocent people – and their myriad goons, Ed and his brother Al had been forced to stay with Roy for safety reasons. Not that the brothers weren't badass fighters, but the police had insisted and Roy had been only too happy to offer. He had a fairly large house that had been left to him by his deceased parents, so he had plenty of room to spare. When the mess was done, and the corporation was no longer a threat, Roy had asked Ed to continue staying with him. He wanted Ed to live with him on a more long-term basis. He didn't even mind the fact that the brothers were a package deal. Where Ed went Al followed, and vice versa. Or, at least, that's how it used to be . . .

With the return of the father that had abandoned them as children, Alphonse had decided he wanted to take this opportunity to get to know dear old dad. Ed, on the other hand, wanted nothing to do with the bastard. Van Hohenheim had left while they were still mostly in diapers, and hadn't even bothered to come back for their mother's funeral or to take over the care of his sons when their mother died. They hadn't even been adolescents yet, but that bastard had left them swinging in the wind without even bothering to make sure they didn't end up in the foster care system – or worse. They weren't even using the man's last name anymore, having changed it to their mother's maiden name when Edward was 12 and Alphonse 11. Needless to say, Ed, who couldn't even call the man "father" without wanting to spit, did not want to be in the same room with the man let alone live with him.

So, when Roy offered to have Ed move in with him, Al had stayed behind in the crappy apartment the brothers had previously shared, their father moving into Ed's old room. And, just like that, for the first time in their lives, Edward and Alphonse Elric lived apart. Ed was not pleased. He'd given everything to keep his little brother safe, to make sure he had a good life where he was free to follow his dreams and find happiness. He'd even lost his right arm and left leg protecting his brother in the car accident that had killed their mother. Now, he worked two jobs despite the fact that he was attending classes and working on completing the research for his doctorate, all just so Al could go to med school and make something of himself. Now that Al was no longer living with him, Ed hardly saw him anymore, and without him there, Ed . . . just didn't know what to do with himself. His whole world had revolved around his baby brother since they were little, so now he was left rudderless and lost, drifting along with nothing to anchor him. It felt like losing his limbs all over again. And, just like when he'd lost his limbs, it fucking hurt.

"What's with the sad face, love?" asked Roy, startling Ed out of his downward spiraling thoughts. Ed groaned and all but dove into Roy's arms, burying his face in his lover's chest and savoring the warmth of the arms wrapping around him. He didn't normally like people touching him, but for some reason he always felt so safe in Roy's arms, as if nothing else in the world mattered except the peace of his embrace. "What's wrong, beautiful? Rough day?"

"That would be the understatement of the fucking century," replied Ed, his voice muffled by Roy's coat. "I need sugar – lots and lots of sugar. Maybe cake or something. I don't know."

"Comfort food, hm? Well, then how about we hit that café for lunch? Then we can stop at the bakery next door afterwards and I can spring for a bag of goodies for you," offered Roy kindly. Damn if this man wasn't the awesomest of awesome people.

"Thanks," said Ed, finally looking up and gladly accepting the kiss Roy gave him. There wasn't anything he liked more than kissing Roy – accept maybe coffee. But then, coffee was his lifeblood, more a necessity to living than an idle indulgence. He was pretty sure, if someone took his coffee away, he'd shrivel up into a vague caricature of his former glory. In fact, he was entirely certain that coffee was responsible for nearly all of his most brilliant scientific breakthroughs – well, coffee and boredom, but why quibble?

"By the way, my team wanted to get together tonight to study for finals," added Roy as they walked the brief distance from Central University to the Copper Coffee Pot Café – the name of the place an obscure reference to an obscure song that never failed to get a giggle out of Ed every time he heard it. "I told them I'd check with you if it was cool to have them come to our place, since we have the most space. So, what do you think?"

"Sure, I guess that's cool," said Ed with a shrug, ignoring the weird tinge of discomfort in his belly whenever he heard the house referred to as theirs instead of Roy's. Living with someone not Al was going to take a lot of getting used to. Thankfully, Roy was being very patient with him and very respectful of his boundaries. "But we don't have much in the way of food. We needed to hit the grocery store, like, two days ago."

"Do you want me to go by the store before heading home?" asked Roy, but Ed shook his head with a sigh.

"Nah, I got it. I haven't got the list written down, just memorized. It's easier if I just do it myself," said Ed with a dismissive wave. "How many am I cooking for tonight?"

"Hmm, I think just the crew from the lab," replied Roy with a shrug. "Though Jean mentioned stopping by to beg you for more tutoring."

"Fine, if you see the idiot chain smoker before I do, tell him I'm cool to tutor him, but he better count himself lucky he's your friend. I usually get paid for tutoring, and my fees ain't cheap," huffed Ed, but though he acted like he was annoyed, he secretly didn't really mind. He liked hanging out with Roy's crew, and Roy's crew all adored Ed and treated him like their very own little brother. It was nice, feeling so readily accepted.

"You could always take it out of him in trade," suggested Roy, and at Ed's appalled look the older man laughed. "Get your mind out of the gutter. I meant make him help you out. I know you need a lab assistant to help you put your lab back together. And what safer lab assistant than one who can't read the research to steal it and is so adamantly straight you know for certain he won't be looking at your ass the whole time. Plus, since he's a jock, he'll be able to handle the heavy lifting so you won't have to."

"Slave labor, hm?" said Ed, thinking it over. "Ma~ybe. We'll see."

They arrived at the café and, after placing their order at the counter, found their favorite table by the window. It was their favorite table for two different reasons, one reason for each. Ed liked it because it got the most sun, and he had always enjoyed sitting in the sunlight, especially in the winter when every iota of warmth was a precious commodity. Roy liked it because it had a great view of the street and made for a perfect people-watching perch. Really, Roy liked any of the tables by the window, but because this one in particular had Ed's seal of approval, the table's status grew higher in his esteem.

"So, tell me what's making your day so long, love," said Roy as they sat down to wait for their food. "Is it the new dean again?"

"Yes and no," replied Ed, letting his head drop so that his forehead was planted on the tabletop with a dull thunk. "He's made it mandatory for all members of faculty and staff to participate in the Fall Charity Festival this year."

"And I know the teachers were telling us today that we'll get extra credit for participating, which probably just makes more work for you teachers," said Roy, looking at Ed contemplatively. "What's so bad about participating in the festival though?"

"Um, Roy, did you just seriously ask me that question?" demanded Ed in a flat tone.

"Ah, yes, I see your point," said Roy, chagrined. Roy was a very social creature by nature, but, conversely, Ed was severely antisocial. Ed was fine with having just a handful of close friends and a few tolerable acquaintances, and to be perfectly honest, the only person he'd ever truly trusted besides his late mom was his brother Al. Roy, on the other hand, seemed to be friends with just about everybody, though there were only a handful that he considered close enough to give his trust to. Of course Roy, the people person, would love the festival and probably have a blast participating. Ed . . . not so much – a fact which Roy should be very well aware of by now. "Did you explain to him about your workload? I mean, he can't honestly expect you to take on anything else given how hard you work already."

"I told him," whined Ed miserably. "He basically told me to suck it up."

"Any idea what event or booth you'll be running?" asked Roy, running a gentle hand through Ed's fringe. As those soft fingers reached his temple Ed leaned into the touch, savoring the contact and the comfort it gave him.

"Nah, there's another faculty meeting tomorrow for tenured faculty and full-time staff, and they'll assign the events and booths during that meeting. Part-timers and student teachers aren't required to show to the meeting, but you bet your ass those of us who don't want to find out too late that they've gotten some super shitty assignment because they weren't there to defend themselves will be at that fucking meeting with bells on. I don't care if it is at 6 o'clock in the fucking morning. I'm gonna be there, even if I have to drive myself." It was a known fact that Ed was absolutely terrified of riding in cars to the point that it could be considered a full-on phobia. It was a car accident, after all, that had killed Ed's mom and taken his right arm and left leg from him. It had almost taken his baby brother too, having left the younger Elric in a coma for two agonizing years. So, yeah, needless to say, Ed was most definitely not a fan of cars. Riding the bus was fine. He could even handle riding in large vans. But cars? Not even a little bit. So, if he said he was willing to drive himself it was a pretty good indication of the depth of his resolve.

"I'll make sure you get up on time, and I'll take you there myself," offered Roy – bless him. "One way or another, we'll make sure you're there to curtail any shenanigans. As soon as I get home I'll set the timer on the coffee maker so that the coffee is ready when you get up."

"If you're trying to get into my pants Mustang, it's totally working," said Ed with a grin, and Roy laughed. He had a great laugh. Like his voice, his laughter was rich and deep, seeming to vibrate from some hidden depth in his chest. Ed could spend all day just listening to Roy talk and never get tired of it, and the sound of his laughter always set a small blaze of heat in the pit of Ed's stomach. Damn, I've got it bad. It's all his fault for being so fucking hot! Where's the justice?

"If I had known it was that easy to bribe you into my bed, I'd have done it the first day we met," said Roy archly, waggling his eyebrows. Ed couldn't help but laugh at that, a now-familiar warmth spreading through his chest at Roy's reaction to Ed's laughter. For some reason, every time Ed laughed, Roy's dark eyes would light up like he'd just been given a Porsche for Christmas. Ed didn't really get it, but then Roy did a lot of things Ed didn't entirely understand. Mysteries of the universe were easy for him to figure out, but mysteries of the human heart were way over his head. "Other than dealing with Professor Grand, how has your day been?"

Ed proceeded to recount for Roy the tales of the many foibles of his students in the class he affectionately – not at all – dubbed Idiot Physics. It was a physics class for kids who weren't actually majoring in a science. Physics 100, or Intro to Physics, was considered a general studies course, good only for fulfilling the necessary science credits to complete general studies requirements for other degrees. Sometimes, freshman from the science department would take the class as a prerequisite, but that was pretty rare – unfortunately.

After lunch, Ed had a class to attend, and after that he had to spend a set amount of time in his office in case the students or faculty needed to speak with him. All the faculty members were required to have office hours, even the student teachers like Ed. Well, actually, especially Ed. Because although Ed was a student teacher, he was also considered full faculty because he more than fulfilled the requirements for the position – he already had two degrees, after all, and was working on his third. He had been attending Central University since he was 16, and he was 22 now, so he was practically a fixture at Central U. Not to mention the fact that the school shamelessly traded on his reputation for brilliant breakthroughs in order to milk donations out of their alumni and trustees.

Honestly, Ed could probably murder someone in the middle of one of his lectures and the school would bend over backwards to cover it up for him – and it wasn't just because of his reputation or qualifications, either. A large part of that was because of the previous dean's bad behavior. Not only had the wrinkled old pervert propositioned Ed – as well as a number of other students – he had embezzled Ed's scholarship money on top of conning money out of the pharma bigwigs, Amestris Pharmaceuticals, that funded Ed's research. After looking into the matter, Ed had discovered that not only had he not been the only victim of the embezzlement, but the dean wasn't the only embezzler. More than a dozen university employees had been fired or arrested thanks to all that, not to mention the handful of Amestris employees who had been in on the scheme. The head of Amestris, Grumman, was a cool old guy and treated Ed like he was his very own grandson. As soon as he'd gotten wind of the embezzlement and attempted extortion, he'd gone on the warpath. It was his lawyers and money that had made sure that the previous dean had received the maximum penalty the law would allow. Ed had adored the old man before all that, and now he all but considered the old guy family.

Speaking of the old man . . . Ed pulled out his phone and found Grumman's number in his contacts list then hit the call button. "Edward! How are you kid?" greeted the old man cheerfully.

"I'm alive, but anything more than that is asking too fucking much," said Ed with a sigh. "But I gotta ask you something. Do you think it would be cool if I got somebody to help me out putting my lab back together? I know my research for you guys is supposed to be super hush hush and all, but I've got finals coming up and now the new dean's added some more shit to my plate. I need help – badly."

"I take it you already have somebody in mind," said Grumman, sounding as amused as always.

"Yeah," replied Ed, his tone implying a shrug. "He's somebody who owes me a favor. He's a jock and not the brightest crayon in the box, academically, so there's no chance of him being able to steal my research. Plus, he's proven his loyalty. He was one of the guys in on the Ouroboros thing. In fact, you met him during one of our little powwows about that. Jean Havoc ring any bells?"

"Yeah! I remember him," said Grumman, chuckling. "He seemed like a good guy. Sure, I don't have a problem with him helping you out. Though, if you really need some help, I'd be more than happy to hire you a real lab assistant. I know there are plenty of bright young people at that university of yours that would be over the moon if they were given a chance to work with you."

"Hell nah," said Ed emphatically. "I don't need to be tripping over somebody else's dick. This is my sandbox, and I don't play well with others."

"Well, if you change your mind, just let me know," said Grumman, chuckling again. "I'll even create a candidate list just in case. It's always best to be prepared."

"Do you know something I don't know, you old fart?" asked Ed in a low growl. He knew that tone in Grumman's voice. He knew it all too well. That was the tone he got when he was already three moves ahead of his opponent and was just waiting for his opponent to realize it too.

"It's nothing like that, Edward," scoffed the old man lightly. "I just happen to know that between finals, work, and the festival you won't have much time for your lab work, and having to practically rebuild your lab from scratch is going to put you behind schedule. I fear you will need to call in help sooner rather than later if you ever want your PhD. It's just that simple. So, keep that bug in the back of your mind, and if you start to feel overwhelmed, give me a call and we'll set up interviews for assistants."

"All right, old man, I'll think about it, but I'm not promising anything more than that," said Ed grudgingly. "I'll talk at you later, old fart."

"Talk to you soon impudent brat," replied Grumman affectionately, and Ed chuckled to himself as he hung up the phone.

As soon as he was free to leave, he gathered up his stuff and shrugged on his tattered pea coat over his red hoodie, pulling the hood out to rest over the top of the collar. After buttoning his coat, he shouldered his laptop bag, positioning the strap across his body, and headed out into the autumn chill. He hated cold weather. He'd loved it as a kid, but now that he had the automail to worry about, cold weather was pure torture. As soon as the metal of his ports began to chill, his whole body would lose all heat a minute later. That was the major drawback of having metal attached to skin, muscle, and bone. Metal grew so very much colder than the human body, and the human body tended to protest being touched by cold metal. During the coldest part of winter, he usually felt like a cryogenics experiment ten minutes after leaving the house. And just to add insult to injury, if his ports got too cold they could cause frostbite in the skin they were attached to and caused the bones that anchored the prosthetics to ache so bad it made his teeth clench just remembering.

By the time Ed reached the grocery store, he was already so cold his teeth were chattering, and he had to run into the store's bathroom so he could apply disposable hot packs to his ports before he could warm up. Since he had lost his right arm up to the shoulder, the anchoring plates covered his entire shoulder, part of his right clavicle, part of his right pectoral, and part of his right scapula. His leg he had lost to just above the knee, so the anchoring plates for the leg port covered his leg up to mid-thigh. This meant that all that cold metal was located very close to his body's core – and his a little too close to his groin – making it very essential that he mind the temperature of his ports and limbs. It would be entirely too easy for him to get hypothermia – and he really didn't want frostbite on his manly bits either.

Once he was finally warm enough that he felt like he was no longer morphing into Frosty the Snowman, Ed ventured back out into the store and found a cart. He wandered the aisles of the store systematically, adding items to the cart as he went. He had to be careful not to buy more than he could comfortably carry. It was going to be a long, cold walk to the house as it was without an overabundance of groceries slowing him down. That was when he saw him . . . someone it shouldn't have been possible to see . . . someone who shouldn't be there . . . who couldn't be there . . . But then he was gone again before Ed could get a proper look to confirm that he'd seen who he thought he'd seen.

Feeling his heart stutter to a stop in his chest before promptly dropping into the pit of his stomach, Ed began to shake from head to toe. His breathing grew quicker until he was all but panting, unable to move from the spot and not daring to close his widened eyes long enough to blink. How the fuck is he here? ran through his head over and over again, and the lack of an answer mocked him, dared him to deny what he'd seen. Almost on autopilot, Ed pulled his phone out of his pocket and called his brother.

"Al," Ed said, his voice shaky and thick. Hearing that tone, Al stopped mid-greeting. "Al, I think I just saw a ghost . . ."