Disclaimer: Ansatsu Kyoushitsu / Assassination Classroom is property of Matsui Yuusei.
The point of view that no one asked for
Sometimes people think I'm like a ghost.
Like a mere spirit, a shadow, a silent and solitary entity who observes them from afar without being involved.
Everyone knows about my existence, many see me often, most are aware of my actions and some seem to pity me. But nobody gives me a single word, or plan to do so. It is normal, natural, because they know that I'm not their problem and I thank them for that.
Because I'm a simple butler. And how they both know, the only people worthy to notice me are the Asanos.
I am the man who constantly goes unnoticed after two imposing figures, who moves away from what doesn't concern him, who is silent in every situation. I am the slender and well dressed figure that stays in the background, analyzing and waiting for the right time to act, working hard under their orders and becoming a silent ally of the family which long ago broke.
Probably, the reason why many people pity me is because they think that working for the Asano family must be difficult. I don't blame them, anyone would think that my work is tedious and exhausting, it is natural to think that way. I'm the apparent servant of a father and a son who are holders of a considerable fortune, both highlighting in education in an exceptional way, winning a lot of awards, a lot of trophys, leaving behind them a host of successes and accolades that many people cost years to achieve. It would be common to think that a poor butler like me would have to endure the demands and orders of two apparently proud and capricious people like they looked.
But it is not true. It has never been. Because I, like the butler that i am, I know many things. Things that nobody knows, things that nobody notices, things that I've seen and it's my duty to keep them for myself. Because it's my job to do it, save the observations I've made over the years for myself, allowing both, father and son, to continue their lives getting my help only when it's necessary and let the time flow.
Because time heals everything, although it seems otherwise.
The Asano family and their relationship are a proof of this. They are the biggest reason that I have to hold on to that idea. And I know I'm not wrong.
I started working for them almost more than ten years ago. Ten years in which I have seen, witnessed, done so many things that sometimes I don't know how to start, or how to react.
I remember very well when I came to that house. I was a young and inexperienced butler, someone trying to understand the situation that developed at that time under that roof. Because at first look it seemed like a normal situation, which had happened many times in this small world that the service is: Asano Gakuhou, a young man recently divorced who had been granted with the full custody of his only, needed my help to bring out everything a busy man like he couldn't carry. Attempting to lift a new elite school how he wanted wasn't easy with a little five years old boy by his side, so giving them all my support was everything I could do.
It took me very little time to realize that the whole situation wasn't normal. That the actions of both father and son weren't the usual in those cases. And as the years passed, all I could do was understand and look, because I have never been able to meddle in what are unresolved issues that both of them maintained.
When I met Asano Gakuhou I though his actions would be the same as those of a divorced father who was beginning to enjoy success. Because the prize of his succes was his time with his son, I thought he would try to compensate his absence before the child, to keep the ties that bound them and that the solitude of his little son could tear apart.
But Asano Gakuhou wasn't like that, not anymore.
The guilt of the suicide of his student had changed him completely, had managed him to look at the world differently, that he decided to change his education policies. Just for not having to suffer a loss like that again, so as not to let anyone around him become weak and manipulated in the same way that Ikeda was. That man wasn't ready to go through another suicide, another death because of him. He never wanted to become an alleged murderer, whose incompetence as a teacher and educator had made an innocent student to launch to death after discovering the cruelty of the real world. He wouldn't let his students go out into the world without knowing how dangerous or ruthless it could be. And this is why he changed everything.
And if he wouldn't allow a student of his to be weak, he couldn't let his son either.
For him, Gakushuu should be his best student. The strongest, the most remarkable. Because of all the students who he would teach throughout his life, his son was the most important and indispensable in his opinion. For that, he should do better with him than others and that meant only one thing: He shouldn't behave like a father did. No. He had to be a teacher for his child. Starting for the beginning, getting rid of the kind and cherised father image that he had built over those precious five years. That image only made him weak and that was inadmissible.
So he ceased being called "Dad" to start being called "Director". It was the price he was willing to pay just to ensure the future of his son, even if it hurt him. And there were many measures that he had taken to achieve this and I have witnessed that for years.
I was in charge of pulling Gakushuu's toys away, by his father's orders, since he considered them a distraction in his studies. I was also in charge of buying books, notebooks and school materials that the father suddenly bombed the child with. I spoke with prestigious academies, with tutors, with conservatories and sport coaches. I took the paperwork for each and every one of the extracurricular activities that the boy was registered to: French, Korean, English, Portuguese, martial arts, guitar lessons, piano, violin, swimming, football, tennis, etc, etc. And after that, I became the chauffeur in charge of taking him to all those places. They were many things and places at once, which a child like him couldn't do all of that with enough time, but he should, because it was a direct mandate from his father.
Asano Gakushuu went from being a mere child to being a puppet overnight. And I saw everything with my own eyes. How one day he was casually playing in the garden, watching his father from afar and wondering why he no longer wanted to be with him, and the next day he was enclosed in the four walls of his room, doing a lot of exercise books, waiting until he had to rise from the chair to go another particular class or another sporting event in which he should end up on the first place, because he hadn't any other choice.
I watched how the gleam in his eyes and the innocent smile on his face swooned slowly to become a perfect-looking mask, I saw him crying disconsolately one night because he had cut himself with a pair of scissors in class and he couldn't go to his piano class, I heard him calling his mother secretly at night because he missed her, I had to calm his anxiety attacks many times because of stress, I let him sleep in the car when he was supposed to go to class because he hadn't rested in days, I took him to lunch secretly to a pastry because coaches didn't allow him to eat something other than vegetables. And I saw the pain on his eyes whenever his father despised him, whenever he was treated as a mere and smiply failed student every time he muttered "not worth a second place, you're weak."
I saw him grow. I saw them grow. Both father and son.
And so, like the protective and observant shadow in which I became, I know many things. Things that no one will know.
Ten years with him are enough to know.
Gakuhou loved him son. He loved him, he loved him, he loved him so much and sometimes he didn't know what to do with that feeling. Gakushuu was his most cherished and loved person in his world, he loved him so much that the fear of losing him almost paralyzed him, assailed him hard, made him work more and more. Losing Ikeda had made him think that if he acted the same way with Gakushuu, he would lose him.
And that was his greatest fear, his only fear. The only thing in the world that could reduce Asano Gakuhou was the undeniable terror of losing his son. That panic was what made him turn around, stop being his father, to go away from him, to turn him into his best pupil. He thought he had no choice, because if he did that could ensure that Gakushuu would survive the cruelty of the world that once took his pupil away from him.
He was convinced of that, and that's why never cared about his son's tears outside the doors of his office. He should be strong, firm, like the director who now everyone knew. Even if those cries cringed his heart, even if the words of hatred that Gakushuu later gave him affected him, even if losing ties with his son broke him.
And Gakushuu loved his father. He loved him in the same way as the other, but he no longer knew how to show that, For the child, his father had always been his hero, his greatest example to follow, the strongest, the smartest, everything that he had always loved and wanted to be. During those five years, in which he had always remained in his heart, he cherished being at his side, following him wherever he went, smilling like the happy innocent child he was. But the fact that Gakuhou had turn his back to him so suddenly just as he had done, left a void in his heart that it was very difficult to fill. His child rationing could never understand the reasons behind his father's actions, but nevertheless he tried to fix them his way, he tried to regain the attention of the man who he admired so much. Gakushuu did the impossible, he threw himself to what the Kunugigaoka's director wanted, to classes, tools, sports, tournaments, prizes, everything. He decided to become the number one because he had no other way to recover what he had lost with his father, but not even that seemed to work.
Eventually the boy was the number one for reflection, an habit, without thinking, without even considering why he did it, because it was normal for him. And what intially were his actions to draw his father attention again, had become a war against him. Because he had already found that the tears and pleas weren't working. But winning in everything, obtaining it all, didn't either. So beating him it was the only way so as to not losing him forever. If he had not done that yet.
And there, after ten years, fully involved in this strange father-son conflict, there's me. The butler. The quiet and formal man who never complained or asked, nor never will. Because I know too much, more than anyone should know. I know even more than the Asano family.
Because I'm like a ghost, his personal ghost. And like a spirit that I sometimes seem, not only I know many things, I have also seem them without they realizing it.
I saw the photography album that Gakuhou saved in the bottom drawer of his office, locked, and that album was plagued with hundreds (perhaps thousands) of photos of Gakushuu that he never dared to throw. I have also seen him smiling proudly and secretly every time his child wins a new award or scores a good mark. I have witnessed how he has led Gakushuu up to his room and slept in his bed after the boy was asleep in the living room or on his desk. I have seen the drawing of an acorn Gakushuu made him years ago, by which he created his school's mascot. And I also know that he holds this very drawing firmly kept in his wallet and he looks at it when he's bored. I've heard him saying to me many times to make his son's favorite dish for dinner, although he didn't like it at all.
I have also seen Gakushuu making sounds on purpose near the office of his father, because he knew that after so much work he could fall asleep on his desk. I've caught him many mornings making breakfast secretly before going to school, as a sort of thanks for letting him eat his favorite dish for dinner the night before. I know most of the time he lied about falling asleep in the living room, so that his father would later lie him in bed. And more than once I've seen him asking if he ate well that day, as if he were concerned about his health.
People think that there is a war among them, but first both should hate each other. And that is something that will never happen, I'm sure.
Because of this, I will never care that people look at me with pity or think that my work is tedious, they think I'm invisible to Asano family, that I'm nobody. But I know that's a lie and both father and son also know.
Because the friendly and grateful smile that Gakuhou leads me every morning when I arrive, it's something that very few people have the privilege to obtain. And the special affection that Gakushuu has come to express for me after so many years nursing him, after so long of pampering him like the child I saw growing in a way I shouldn't have, means more to me than any check or bundle of cash.
Honestly, contrary to what many butlers o chauffeurs might think, I'm glad to work for them. I am happy to be the protective shadow of the Asano family, I am happy to be their ghost.
Because I know everything, I have the point of view that no one asked for, but everyone would want to have.
And because of this, this servant will remain beside them everytime he can.
Hi ~
Finally, FINALLY I can show this one-shot, I was waiting this day and finally is here (?) This one-shot is my last fic of the AnkyoWeek, yes, only 4 fic but I couldn't write more, sorry, but this is probably my favorite of all ~ This time the prompt was "Family relationship".
Yes, I think everyone know my obsession with Asano familya and their relationship, I'm not okay, and it was obvious that I would write something about them. This time I want to make something different and I write this with the butler POV, yes. That man who always was in the background, that man. I have always think that Gakushuu could have a good relationship with him because he taked care of him since he was a children (?) It's a good headcanon for me, yes.
I hope someone like it and sorry if I have errors in this authors notes, It's later here ~
See you (~*-*)~~(*-*~)