Now won't you listen honey, while I say,
How could you tell me that you're goin' away?
Don't say we must part,
Don't break your baby's heart.

These were the words that could be heard echoing through the forest on one, seemingly typical, warm day. That day, the tourists thought that the forest was cursed. An argument quickly shot down by the locals. Even thought the locals themselves had no idea who, or what, played that music.

You know I've loved you for these many years,
Loved you night and day,
Oh! honey baby, can't you see my tears?
Listen while I say...

No one could exactly pinpoint the source. No one, except yours truly.

You see, somewhere in this forest, a boy was sleeping on the ground covered with various kinds of plant life. And while sleeping isn't the appropriate in this situation (to be honest, more like "fucking bleeding to death"), I can tell you that said boy is unconscious. One could say that he went through Hell and back.

With a muffled moan, the boy raised his head slowly.

"Fucking..." He seethed as he slowly got on his knees. "My head is ringing like a gong..."

Barely able to hold himself together, the boy fell on the ground below him. His body slowly rolled to prevent himself from choking on the grass. The eyes took some time to adjust to the bright, cloudless sky above him.

"Wut... wait a minute..."

Slowly, he raised his abdomen with the help of his already weakened arms. Something wasn't right. Something just didn't feel right. Since when that speck of dust had... this? Big trees? Blue sky? The Hell?

"Alright Bray. Don't panic, try to get some focus... and shut that fucking music off."

"Bray", short for Braylon, tapped his index finger on the touchscreen of his PDA 9000, a personal
bracer-shaped device on his left arm. This little miracle was the very best piece of tech humanity could offer. Naturally, an advanced device like that could be made in very few numbers. In fact, it is so rare, that finding/owning it is even more rare than a miracle itself! Truly blessed are those who own such thing.

"Work, you stupid piece of scrap metal!" Braylon shouted. For the last few minutes he tried to discover his whereabouts. But he always got the same message from the AI.

Error. Connection denied.

Say what? Connection denied? In an era where every colonized planet has at least five satellites? Wait, let me correct myself. They have satellites if they are some kind of backwater/redneck of a planet in the middle of bumfuck (insert name) galaxy. Modern tech requires no satellites to work.

Ah, but wait! What if he ended on a planet not yet colonized from humanity? Ridiculous, but possible.

All of that could wait for now. He needed to get his shit together. And judging by his body covered in cuts and bruises, that's not gonna happen very soon. No worries though, his PDA will take care of it.

Remember when I said how much advanced this device was? Well, I wasn't lying, I can tell you that. It has... quite a lot of functions. Some of them are the following:

All ECHO functions integrated into itself (such as, weapon storage unit, full 24/7 ECHOnet connection etc.), the ability to materialize/dematerialize matter at will (the dematerialized matter will be stored in the PDA and then released when the owner wants to) and even something known as "Holographic Weapon Maker" (or HWM for short). HWM allows the PDA to materialize CQC weapons made of solid light that can aid the user depending on the situation. There are many of these "tools", but Braylon only managed to unlock three of them for now.

First, there is the "Holo Sabre" which is a large curved blade (very similar to a claw) that can cut through 98% of hardest alloys known to man. Then there is the "Holo Claw", three smaller blades shaped like claws that help greatly when the user needs to tear (or grab) something. The last is the "Holo Sawblade". Unlike the other two, this baby allows the PDA to shoot holographic sawblades at his enemies. Perfect when you want to "surprise" someone.

Oh, I forgot to mention one of the most important. The PDA has something called implants. Small chip-like thingies that increase the performance of its owner. And Braylon has quite a lot of them into himself. Such as one that slowly heals his sorry-ass over time. Pretty cool, eh?

I must warn you, however, that this is not the only equipment Braylon has. He quickly checked his inventory and sighed in relief when he saw he had all of his weapons.

Yes, yes. Braylon has weapons. But what kind of seventeen-year-old could possibly carry such dangerous toys around? A seventeen-year-old that is a Vault Hunter, that's what! And I hope you do know what a Vault Hunter is. I will only describe it to you in one word.

Badass.

Right, the weapons. So he has quite an arsenal, you know. Let's see...

For small guns there are the Chimera, the Unforgiven and the Hard Reboot. One shotgun called Bullpup, two sniper rifles (Omni-Cannon and Trespasser*), two assault rifles (non-elemetnal Fusillade and the Damned Cowboy), a rocket launcher (Nukem), two laser guns (incendiary Mining-Laser and the cryo Excalibastard), two grenade mods (explosive Meganade and corrosive Pandemic)... and as a cherry on top, a shield called The Bee.

Yeah, quite impressive indeed.

Now that we have put this little thing away, let's focus back on that kid.

Since he had no idea where to go, he simply decided to go into a random direction. Contrary to popular belief, it is a known fact that when you search for something, you will never find it. If you do, however, choose to do something random, you end up doing exactly what you wanted in the first place!

And right now, he needed new clothes.

As he walked through the forest, the boy took a look on the local flora and fauna. It looked eerily similar to that from Earth but with a few exceptions here and there. Nothing noteworthy.

For some reason, Braylon felt relaxed. The scenery was... calming. Birds were chirping, rabbits would run away... and nothing tried to kill him yet!

Oops. Spoke to soon.

Just as he decided to take a break and enjoy some tranquillity, a group of very fucked up wildlife jumped out from their hiding places and menacingly growled at their next victim.

If I were one of those nerds, I would say that these things resembled those mythical werewolves from fantasy novels, videogames and whatnot. The only thing different is that these things had no sense of creativity. I mean, all of them looked as if they were fucking clones of each other. Same black fur, same stupid white (bony?) mask and same stupid red eyes.

Clones. Clones. Better not think of that now.

"I don't have time for this." Braylon sighed as he picked Unforgiven, the only gun he always has in his holster, and placed one bullet into each werewolf rip-off. The Jakobs revolver was powerful enough to tear trough that pathetic attempt at defending the head with ease. Combine that with an enhanced Vault Hunter and you get a pretty awesome result.

Then, the things started... melting. Melting into black smoke. For a moment he thought that his mind was playing tricks on him. As usual.

Time was money, so without further ado, Braylon continued down his path hoping to find any kind of civilisation.

Well dip me into chocolate and throw me to the lesbians. What a find.

It was a city!

City means humans. Humans mean shops. And shops mean clothes.

The young Vault Hunter stared at the city in front of him. He was disappointed, kinda. He hoped it would be bigger. This... can't even be called a city. It looks more like something from 1800s. Where are the flying cars and shit? Nevertheless, it gave him something to think about.

Did he go back in time?

He tried to remember what happend to him before he got here. But all he got were headaches and something more akin to blurry images and sounds.

He noticed that he was here alone. His friends (if you can call them that) are not anywhere near. If they were, he would pick their ECHO devices and their signals. He also noticed how his PDA still had no connection to ECHOnet, which would gave him a vague idea of where he is in the galaxy. Good thing that the PDA can automatically make maps of the region he passes through.

Braylon reached the walls of the town, which was weird in itself. Why a city needs a wall with all those technological defenses that are capable of frying an amoeba from few kilometers away?

Dismissing those thoughts, Braylon climbed the walls and "infiltrated" into the city.

It really was nothing special. But he had to admit that the streets were very clean. Clean and free of any bandit scum that would gladly make a pair of boots from your skin.

He also found something paradoxical. While the houses and the streets would give the impression of an 1800s city, the fashi certainly did not. Seriously though, what's up with all these fucking flashy colors? If they were on a battlefield, they would just be way more easy to kill.

But this isn't a battlefield. And this definitely isn't his homeplanet Pandora. There is just no way to make a city such as this on that hellhole. Take Opportunity for example.

What baffled him even more were the vehicles. Sure, Pandora has many vehicles on wheels but why a city has those?

Maybe he was overthinking things. He needed to complete his objective. And fast.

Everywhere he went the citizens would just stare at him in horror. Some even ran away screaming. Typical city boys and girls. They see someone covered from head to toe in blood and everyone looses their minds. Hell, they probably think that not drinking tea is anarchy. Just like the British.

Hey look, a clothes store. Finally.

He entered and said "hello" to the girl behind the counter. The reaction has no need to be described. Fuck cities.

Anyway, he went to straight for the male clothes and it almost made him puke.

"Christ, is this what kids wear these days?"

Nothing that really matched his style. Not that he had any.

Still, he barely found what he needed. Camo jeans, black shoes, orange T-shirt and a black varsity jacket with olive green sleeves (which he decided to keep unbuttoned). Generic, but that's the point. He needed to blend into the society. He was very (in)famous and the last thing he needed was someone recognizing him. Wouldn't be nice that for once he could do something without someone going on a convenient rampage which just so happens to be near him?

Yea right.

A group of agent Smith wannabes rushed into the shop with some Lightsaber knock-offs.

"Someone watched Star Wars a bit too much..."

He didn't bother listening to the group of bandits which were shouting something to the poor girl. What made him angry was the girl, which was about to cry. Two of those people started destroying the place for emphasis while one of them went towards Braylon. The remaining three stood at the entrance.

While pointing the weapon at him, the wannabe idiot started talking about "not trying anything stupid" and to "put the hands in the air" and blah, blah, blah. What an annoying piece of shit.

"Whose kitty litter did I just shit in for you to get pissed off?" Braylon asked nonchalantly the man, which was take by surprise.

"Watch your tone. And your mouth. Now put your hands in the air!"

"Okay, okay. Jeez..." Braylon raised his hands high in the air.

As the wannabe went near him to rob him of anything precious he had, Braylon smirked and materialized his Holo Sabre. In one quick motion he sliced the bastard in two equal parts. Needless to say, there was a blood party. Some of it had stained his new clothes.

"Oh for fuck's sake! I just found these, you know?!" He shouted, gaining the attention of the remaining bandits. Their jaws dropped when they saw their comrade becoming half a man he used to be.

Before they could react, Braylon used his gun to place a hole in each of the two mooks who ruined this place. He was pissed off. Meanwhile, the girl just shrieked and passed out.

"Listen, idiots. I am gonna count to ten. You have exactly ten seconds to get your asses out of this place before i decided to gift you all with a new asshole. One..."

The remaining mooks, completely terrified by the display of power, immediately left the building and ran as fast as their legs could carry them. It was kinda funny.

Before braylon left too, he took a new pair of the same clothes and placed few dollars on the counter.

Night fell quickly. Braylon spent few hours trying to find a place to wash himself (which was a success) and to explore the city a bit further. Interestingly, he learned that this city was called "Vale". And yet he has no idea on what planet he is.

Heavily sighing, Braylon lowered his head as he walked down the road. His major goal was to go back to Pandora. That and to remember how did he got here.

He was taken out of his musings when he saw a shop which was named "From Dust Till Dawn". Ignoring the obvious pun, Braylon decided to take a look. His curiosity won the battle for his mind.

Inside was an old man selling some kind of... jewelry?

"Hello. Do you need anything?"

"Nah. Just taking a look."

Braylon eyed the crystals in front of him. Aside from being very colorful, they looked like regular jewels. But what really weirded him out were some tubes filled with something on his left. He walked closer to them to investigate further. Each tube had some kind of... dust?

Are those drugs?

He heard the door open and saw the last thing he wanted to see.

Those fucking bandits.

This time there was a white sheep in the family. White, because unlike others this guy had actually some creativity. The man started speaking.

"Oh my God. A gentleman thief? Thought those were a dying breed. Oh well..."

Everything went smooth for the group until three of them started whispering and stared at the boy. Said mooks became extremely pale and ran out. The man in white thoguht that the three cowards had some kind of a mental breakdown. The only lackey left facepalmed and went for the back of the shop... only to be thrown out through a window by a red blur. This was a chance to take down this white asshole.

"Hey pal." The man turned his head slowly to Braylon and raised the visible eyebrow. "Your friends already tried to rob another place. Few of them met their creator. So unless you wanna share their fate, I suggest you to go fuck yourself."

The man only scoffed as he turned around to leave, murmuring something.

"Huh, I actually thought I would need to spend some bullets..."

BOOM!

"What the-"

Braylon ran out to see what could cause such a loud noise. What he found was a girl in a red cape who vanished in a cloud of petals only to reappear towards a nearby building.

"Great, my mind is fucked. I really hope those weren't drugs..." The Vault Hunter thought as he ran towards that building.

With the help of some ladders, he got on the roof. He saw the girl with the red cape and the white man smirking as he stood on some kind of a flying vehicle. A desgin Braylon never saw before.

Bowler hat threw one red crystal (which, Braylon thoguht, resembled one of those back in the shop) and aimed with his cane. Whatever this guy's plan was, it quickly became thwarted as Braylon materialized his Hard Reboot shock handgun and fired a bullet at him. The cocksucker got a burst of electricity and screamed in pain, hiding deep into the darkness of the vehicle. In his place stood a woman in a revealing red dress. Her face was completely hidden.

The last thing Braylon expected for her to do was to use sorcery. Seriously. She used sorcery. There was no other way to describe it.

She created some kind of fiery arrows and tossed them at the duo.

Surprise! In their assistance came an older blond woman with a riding crop and performed her sorcery too.

"Okay... those were definitely drugs..."

While Braylon stared with his jaw dropped, the blond woman was able to force the one in the red dress into a retreat.

By then it was too late to reach them. He could take it down with a well placed shot from his Nukem or Trespasser, but he now had other problems to deal with.

The stare of the blonde.

"Just how did I get myself into this?!"

The blondie and the other girl were having a talk. Pretending to care, Braylon actually picked some information up. Something about slaps on the wrists and pats on the back.

Then the blondie slammed her riding crop on the table, causing the little girl to jump back in surprise. Braylon slightly cringed as his attention was fully hers. Kinda.

Another investigator came in. An old man with a plate full of cookies and a mug, of all people. Braylon raised an eyebrow. Was this man supposed to scare him into some confession?

Before he spoke, the mysterious man looked at Braylon and then at Ruby.

"Ruby Rose..."

"God, what a dumb name..."

The man leaned closer to the nervous girl.

"You..." He looked at Braylon again and then back at her. "...Have silver eyes."

"How perceptive..." Braylon deadpanned. His comment wasn't taken well by the blonde.

"Where did you learn to do this?" He showed a device with a video playing her actions. This is what got Braylon's attention for real. A girl like her doing stuff like that? Where has he saw that one? Oh right... forget I asked.

Moreover, from where did she pull that scythe? From her ass?

"...Signal academy?"

"They taught you to use one of the most dangerous weapons ever designed?"

"HAH!" Braylon scoffed. If a farmer's tool is "one of the most dangerous weapons ever designed" then these people have never heard of satellite cannons.

"Well, one teacher in particular..."

"I see." The man gave Ruby a plate of cookies which she devoured in record time.

"It's just that I've only seen one other scythe wielder with that skill before... a dusty old crow..."

"Oh, that-"

"No way!" Braylon interrupted. "Does it happen to be a farmer?" He laughed, gaining the man's stare.

"No, that would be my uncle Qrow! He is a teacher at Signal. I was complete garbage before he took me under his wing and now I'm all like-"

"Can we just get this over with?" Braylon asked. "I have shit to do."

"Language!" Was the response that came from both females in the room.

"And what does a girl like you do in a school designed for warriors?"

"Say what?"

"I... want to be a Huntress."

"Are you perhaps from the Victorian era, kid? It is Hunter, not Huntress. But if that's so than go take a blunderbuss and start catching those pigs in the woods! HAHAHA!"

Ruby lowered her head and pouted. Braylon's onslaught made her feel a bit uncomfortable.

"Young mister!" Ozpin warned. "Could you please give some respect to Miss Rose?"

"Oh, since you asked so nicely." He smirked.

"I have... only two more years at Signal and then I'm going to apply to Beacon. My sister started this year and..."

Braylon shut off from the rest of the conversation and started playing with his PDA. He was bored, that's for sure.

After the man, who goes by the name of "Ozpin" (so he casually heard), asked her if she wanted to come to this academy and skip two years, which she replied with yes, he dismissed her and the other blondie escorted the girl out.

"And then... there's you."

"Yup." Braylon said. "There's me."

Braylon couldn't see the man's face as his eyes were glued to the screen. But he knew for a fact that Ozpin was looking at him.

"You too..."

"Hm?"

"...Tell me, what is your name?"

"Who wants to know?"

"I can assure you that what are we talking here will remain only between us."

"Hmpf. Yeah right. Oh well... name's Braylon."

"Braylon and-"

"Just Braylon." The boy interrupted, his eyes still on the PDA.

"Pleased to meet you. I'm -"

"Can we just skip this formalities bullshit and get straight to the point?"

"Of course. And I advise you to change both your tone and language. There is no need to be hostile."

"Sure, sure..."

There was a brief silence before the man spoke again.

"What is that device on your arm?"

"Something that I'm not willing to share. Next question."

"I see... would you like to become a Huntsman?"

"Not really. I'm already a Vault Hunter. Dunno if I can change careers."

"A 'Vault Hunter'?"

Braylon raised his eyes. "You know what that is, don't you?"

Ozpin shook his head slowly.

"Welp, my fucking luck..."

"Language."

"Yes, daddy." Braylon sighed. "And even if I accept, what do I get in return?"

"Exxperience, friendships..."

"Screw that. Where's the money?"

"Money?"

"Yeah. Green paper, big money, jackpot, whatever."

"You receive money as payment for completing jobs after you graduate."

"Yeah, no. I'm already super smart. I don't need a school."

"We also provide students with free food and rooms."

"Okay. Count me in then."

"...That was easy,"

"Believe me, from where I come from, these things are a luxury." The young Vault Hunter said as he got up and tapped the touchscreen of his device, which started playing music.

"Now won't you listen to me honey, while I say... How can you tell me that you're goin' away?" The kid sang as he went out of the room by himself, leaving the older man alone with his thoughts.

Ozpin hummed as he took a sip from his mug.

"Quite lucky indeed..."

*For the purpose of the story, this gun will be able to penetrate MOST types of shields. Including things like these magical force fields.

So how is it? Did you like it? I hope you did. Anyways, I am probably goin to change some more chapters. Emphasis on probably.

Btw, here is some information from the original chapter I feel I need to leave here.

a) This is meant to be a parody of Borderlands. Everyone who played the games knows how OP the Vault Hunters are. After all, Borderlands is a pardoy of FPS games. Expect the bullshit meter to rise astronomically when the VH is fighting.

b)The VH in question is a badass due to many "adventures" he had in the past. This unique experience will make him most of the times completely unstoppable. That is, of course, the point. And while he is just one of the main characters, the story will be mostly focused about how he adapts to this crazy new world. This doesn't that others won't be relevant.

c) The fighting scenes are... brutal. And not in a nice way. This is a warning, if you cannot stand casual organ parties or executions Manhunt-style then this is not for you. When fighting important characters, it will be drastically different.

So this is all for now. Once again, I hope you enjoyed it and thanks for reading it. Bye!