1

Jack felt as if he'd been struck across the back with a wooden plank.

He laughed once, thinking this conversation absurd, but somewhere beneath the denial, he knew something was wrong. He tried to make sense of it, wanting nothing more than to believe his mate over this gutter scoundrel, but all his thoughts were becoming scrambled. For some reason—and it shamed him to admit it—his instinct moved him to doubt Ianto.

"You don't look as surprised as I thought you might," Lisant said with interest. "No more arguments?"

Jack felt Ianto's uneasy presence at his side.

"Let me explain," he pleaded.

Let me explain?

Jack couldn't bring himself to look at him. He knew he should hear him out, but he just couldn't listen right now.

"There's nothing to explain," Lisant said. "It's quite simple. he married me, then perhaps a little hastily, he married you. Fickle little thing, isn't he."

Jack wanted to say something. Anything. But words would not come.

He heard Ianto's voice like a distant echo. "Jack, please listen to me—"

He cut him off by holding up his hand and speaking to Lisant. "I have a marriage certificate."

Lisant dug into his breast pocket.

"How brilliant. So do I." He unfolded a piece of paper and held it up. "See for yourself."

The print blurred before Jack's eyes.

He saw Ianto's signature, and Lisant's.

A sickening lump settled in his gut.

"See?" Lisant said.

But Jack could not see. He could not accept this. Ianto was his. They'd spent the past month together on his farm, working together, learning to trust each other, growing to love each other. They'd made promises….

"Jack, there's so much more to this that you don't know about," Ianto said, his voice desperate. "If only you'd let me explain…."

Finally, he met his gaze. All he saw was the man who had hidden secrets from him on their wedding day. He had asked him if he loved this man, and he had said yes at the time. Now, to learn that he had actually married him?

Ianto touched his shoulder, but he shrugged his hand away.

"Please, Jack."

He could not stay here.

He had to leave.

If he didn't, he might say, or do, something he'd come to regret.

He hopped down into the street, his boots splashing into a puddle. He felt the cold, hard rain battering against his hat as he tried to make sense of what he'd just learned.

If this man was Ianto's true husband—that meant the past month on his farm with him was nothing but a charade.

Truthfully, it wasn't all that surprising.

He'd been expecting something like this from the beginning. When had love ever remained? When had it not been taken away from him?

Jack climbed into the skipper staring straight ahead. He flicked water into the air as a damp chill invaded his clothing. Raindrops trickled from his eyelashes onto his cheeks.

As he started to pull away, he heard a muffled cry from somewhere beyond his barely functioning brain. He tried to block it out, but it cut through his pain and wrath like a blade.

Don't look back, he told himself over and over as he turned the skipper toward home. But the scream punctured his resolve yet again.

He pulled the skipper to a halt.

He sat there, paralyzed, water streaming down his face.

He felt like he was surrounded by a thick fog and couldn't find his way forward. The muffled screams were coming at him from somewhere outside this debilitating stupor.

Ianto.

He was crying for him to come back.

He swung around in the seat.

Lisant was dragging him by his broken arm, pulling him along the boardwalk while he struggled and pleaded for help.

Good God—what was wrong with him?

Leaping from the skipper, Jack sprinted toward them. His boots splashed through the mud. Rain battered his face, but he felt none of it as he flew up onto the boardwalk.

Ianto was shouting and causing a scene. He turned back just as Jack overtook them and punched Lisant in the face.

Lisant stumbled backwards, onto the boardwalk.

The whole world went quiet and still as Jack took hold of Ianto's good hand and led him toward the skipper. He scooped him up into his arms, set him onto the seat, and in a matter of seconds, he was powering up the skipper and flying away, mud splattering everywhere.

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Ianto tried to control his tears, but couldn't.

Cold rain struck his cheeks as they sped into the wind.

Sobbing, gasping for breath, he clung to the side of the skipper as they skidded around a corner.

He said a silent thank you that Jack had come back for him.

Turning his gaze toward Jack, he wondered miserably if it even mattered.

He was staring straight ahead, all emotion absent from his dark expression.

Yes, he had rescued him from Lisant, but had he lost all feeling for him in the process?

"Jack, I'm so sorry," he shouted over the noise of the engines.

"Why didn't you tell me about that?" he said. "Is it true? Did you actually marry him?"

"It's complicated," he tried to explain. "I didn't tell you because, at first, I was afraid you wouldn't take me. Then, after our wedding night, I was afraid you'd send me back. Then, I just…I fell in love with you and I didn't want you to know. I was ashamed of how stupid I was."

"Ashamed? Feeling embarrassed or remorseful is the least of your problems, Ianto. There's the law to consider here. Do you not know that bigamy is illegal?" He focused on the road.

Ianto, swivelling in the seat to face him, clutched Jack's sleeve in his fist. "You haven't given me a chance to explain what happened. And can you honestly say you wouldn't have sent me away after our wedding night, if you knew? You almost left me behind just now, after everything we'd been through these past few weeks. I thought we'd fixed things. I thought there was hope for us, but you almost left me behind!"

"I'm not the one who should be defending myself," he said. "You are."

"If you'd given me a chance to speak back there, I would have told you what really happened. Now, I'm not even sure it makes any difference."

Ianto saw the muscle in his jaw tighten. After a few seconds, he pulled the controls back and slowed the skipper down to second, then met his gaze and studied his face. "What do you mean, what really happened?"

Ianto wiped the wetness from his cheeks. "It's not as simple as Lisant made it out to be. I didn't just marry him and then marry you. I wouldn't do that."

"Are you telling me you're divorced? Or that you had it annulled?"

He shook his head, wishing it could be so. "No. But when I married you, I honestly believed I was free to do so."

He pulled the skipper to a stop on the edge of town. "What are you trying to tell me?"

"That my marriage to Lisant was never a true one."

"Why not?"

"Because he already had a mate. Our wedding was a sham. He was just trying to trick me and use me. He took everything from me."

Jack sat stone-still, blinking from the rain. "You mean he is guilty of bigamy?"

"Yes. But I didn't know that when I married him. He told me on our wedding night, just after we'd…"

Jack held up a hand to stop him. "Why didn't you tell me this before? If you were innocent, you could have reported him. It could have been straightened out before you ever came here."

"You wouldn't have wanted me if you knew. And besides that, Lisant threatened me. He said if I told anyone, he'd say I knew what I was doing, that I was a con artist, just like him. Then I saw your ad and I had the chance for a decent life with an honest man. Someone I could respect and start a family with. I didn't think I'd ever get the chance to have those things if anyone knew about my past. I thought if I could keep the whole thing a secret, at least until time had gone by and I could straighten things out later. But I made a mistake when I got on the Transporter in Delvon Prime. I should have used a different name, or disguised myself."

"You make it sound as if your only mistake was in getting caught."

He shook his head. "I don't expect you to understand. I wish I could go back and undo everything."

They sat in silence a moment, both of them soaking wet. Ianto couldn't stop his teeth from chattering.

"So what does this mean?" Jack asked, looking down at the leather wheel he was twisting in his big hands. "Are we married or aren't we?"

He didn't want to answer that question, but he knew if he wasn't completely honest with him now, all would be lost. The time for secrets had come to an end. "I'm not sure of anything anymore."

He turned to him. "Why should I believe you after what you've kept from me?"

"Because I love you, Jack," he replied. "You know I do. Surely you've felt it.

We've come so far together. I was just so afraid you would be disappointed in me and stop loving me."

Jack bowed his head to rest on his hands.

"In my heart, I'm your mate," Ianto continued. "You're the only man I will ever love. Isn't that what's most important?"

He frowned and shook his head. "You tell me that you love me, but all along you knew you were lying to me. What kind of love can there be without trust?"

"Jack—"

"No, you have to answer me. How do you expect me to respond to all this? How do you expect me to love you now, when I don't have the slightest idea who you really are?"

Ianto shuddered at his disillusioned tone. "You say there can't be love without trust. But I trust you. With my life."

Jack tore his gaze away from him. "Maybe that's because I never lied to you."

With growing resentment, Ianto thought about everything they'd been through, how he'd been treated after their wedding night, how Jack had been so punishing toward him. "Never lied to me? What about Gwen? You didn't tell me any of that. I had to find out from Martha!"

"That has nothing to do with this."

"Why not?"

"Because it wasn't the same. I didn't lie about Gwen. I just never mentioned her. There was no point."

Ianto felt his blood quicken in his veins. "It was exactly the same. And yes, there was a point. She was the reason you sent for me. I was just a way for you to forget her. You were using me just as much as I was using you."

Jack squeezed the wheel in his hands.

"I know you weren't over her when you married me," Ianto went on. "So if Lisant finds a way to destroy what we have will you order another mate and forget about me, too? As if the past month never happened?"

"Of course not." Jack's voice was low and controlled.

"If you were truly over Gwen," Ianto continued, "you wouldn't fight so hard against trusting me or loving me."

He stood up in the skipper, towering over Ianto. "I told you that has nothing to do with this. I am over her. I'm just not over the…."

It was as if he only now understood the emotions he'd worked so hard to ignore all this time.

"The what?" Ianto pressed him.

His tone softened. "The fact that the people I care about always get taken away. They leave, or they die."

He sat down again and his expression was completely open. "I watched my family die, Ianto. Right in front of my eyes. My mother, my father, my baby sisters and little brother. There was nothing I could do to stop it, and I thought I was going to die, too. I don't know why I was spared."

Fighting tears, Ianto covered his hands with his. "Oh, Jack."

"I didn't want to love you," Jack said. "I worked hard not to, but then I gave myself permission to hope, and now I find out that you were never mine to begin with."

"I am yours, Jack," Ianto sighed. "I've been yours since the moment we walked into the courthouse and you made me feel safe and cared for, as if everything was going to be all right."

He bowed his head. "But you were Lisant's before you were mine. You spoke vows. You promised to love him until death parted you. Did you really believe you would? Did it mean anything to you when you said it?"

Ashamed, he tried to find a way to answer him. But how could he, when he didn't even know the answer himself?

"Did it?" Jack pressed.

Unable to look him in the eye, he nodded. "I wrongly believed in him. And perhaps, if he had turned out to be a good man, I would still be with him."

"You promised him a lifetime."

He quickly looked up. "And you promised me one, too, when you didn't know me at all."

Jack did not respond.

He simply stared at the gray horizon, blurred with rain and mist, while he considered everything.

"Please, believe me," Ianto said. "I thought I was free to marry you. I was certain my marriage to Lisant was not valid, and over the past month I've grown closer to you than I ever was to him. To anyone."

"The past month…." Jack gazed up at him, despondently. "In all that time, I never really knew who you were."

His tone sent a chill down Ianto's spine.

"But you know now," Ianto said. "I promise, you know everything."

"Maybe so," Jack said, uncertainly.

Panic shot through Ianto as Jack powered the skipper up, turning them around.

"Where are we going?" he asked.

"Back to see Gray," Jack replied. "He's a solicitor, and I want to know what's real and what isn't—at least in the eyes of the law."

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Each of them drenched to the core with rain, Ianto and Jack pulled into Gray's yard. They had not spoken a word since Jack had turned the skipper around.

Without waiting for Jack to assist him, Ianto climbed down and hurried toward the front door to escape the downpour. His arm ached and throbbed with every move he made, but the pain in his heart was worse by a long shot.

He pulled the front door open, and shivering, entered the warm, dry house.

Gray met him in the front hall. "Ianto, you're soaked. Come in by the stove."

He led him into the kitchen. "Where's Jack?"

The front door squeaked open and he heard his husband's boots tap against the step. Gray immediately went to meet him.

"What's wrong with you?" he demanded. "Ianto could have caught his death out there."

As much as he could tell from the kitchen, Jack didn't answer.

He wondered if he even cared.

Jack walked into the room and didn't waste a single second on civilities.

"Gray, we have a legal problem and we need your help."

Gray followed behind Jack and gave Ianto a questioning glance. "Maybe we should go into the parlour."

Jack gestured for Ianto to lead the way. He went in and sat on the sofa in front of the window, and Gray handed him a blanket that was draped over the back of a chair. He helped him wrap it around his shoulders.

"I suppose you should be the one to explain it," Jack said. "You know what happened better than I do."

Ianto hesitated, wondering how he would ever get through this. His stomach felt like it was bleeding fire. "It's something very private, I'm afraid,"

Gray removed his spectacles. "You may be assured of my utmost discretion."

"Thank you." This was proving more difficult than he expected. he kept his eyes lowered. "I…I made a mistake before I married Jack, and now I'm afraid it's going to ruin everything."

"What sort of mistake?"

Ianto stood and walked to the unlit fireplace, staring numbly at the white china bowl on the mantel. How could he say this to Gray, his brother-in-law, who had always made him feel so welcome?

But if he was going to set things right with his husband, he had to find a way.

Closing his eyes, he began. "I was involved with another man before Jack and I were married, and the involvement progressed to the point of…"

Hearing Jack clear his throat, he stopped, unable to go on.

Ianto tried to find the right words, but gave up, deciding there was no respectable way to put it. "I married him."

he heard Gray whistle in shock. "You're divorced?"

"No, Gray. That's the problem. I'm not divorced."

he faced the two brothers squarely. Gray merely stared, his mouth agape.

Jack stood in angry silence.

"Ianto, I don't understand," Gray said.

"I didn't get the divorce because I never believed the marriage was legal in the first place. I still don't, but I'm not certain. If only I'd had the courage to seek legal advice right away, but I was afraid I'd be arrested."

Gray stopped pacing and shot him a horrified look. "Arrested! Why?"

"Because he already had a mate."

Gray sank into the rocking chair by the fireplace and rested his forehead in his hand. "Good God. This is unbelievable. You mean he never divorced his first mate before marrying you?"

"No."

"And he wasn't a widower?"

"No."

"You're telling me you married a bigamist?"

"Yes."

Gray glanced at his brother. "You knew nothing of this?"

"Not until today," Jack said his voice flat.

"At first I didn't tell him," Ianto added, "because I was ashamed and afraid he would turn me away. You have to understand, Gray—that I had no notion what I was getting into when I met Lisant. He was charming in the beginning and then he became very cruel. I had to escape the marriage."

Ianto was desperate to salvage whatever was left of Gray's good opinion of him. "I had no idea he was already married, and now he's followed me to Boeshane and he wants me back. I'm afraid of what he might do if I don't obey him. He told me he'd never let me go, and now he knows that I'm married to Jack."

Gray sat forward. "He's here? You spoke to him? Did anyone see you? There's definitely going to be a scandal."

Jack finally spoke up. "Gray, you're missing the point. Are any of his marriages legal?"

His detached tone made Ianto shudder inwardly.

Gray scratched his head. "I'm not sure."

"What do you mean, you're not sure?" Jack shouted. "Law is your profession."

"I'd need to see the written documents," Gray explained, "including those that go along with Lisant's first marriage. And I must be straightforward with you, I've never dealt with a bigamy case before. I'll have to look it up."

"How long will that take?"

He thought about it for a moment. "It's difficult to say. I may have to consult with a colleague."

"Wonderful," Jack whispered, heading for the door.

"Where are you going?" Ianto asked, feeling his courage rush out of him.

"For a walk."

"Can I come with you? We could talk more about this."

"There's nothing more to talk about, and I need to be alone." He walked out and slammed the door behind him