Chapter 19: Tongues and Words

A/N: Last one! It's shamelessly long. Enjoy :)

Lunch turned into a competition over who could eat the most. Natsu and Gray kept smiling at each other, which embarrassed both of them, goading them into exchanging insults. Which relieved the tension, because fighting was normal. As soon as they were relaxed, they'd start grinning again and then get embarrassed and the whole thing would start over again.

It made for an energetic lunch—and after, too, as they continued sitting there, not a clue what to do but not wanting to be anywhere else.

The cycle of insults, grins, and embarrassment picked right back up again the next day. It put Natsu on edge in an excited, fuzzy way: he didn't want to be anywhere else. The two boys only broke off when Loki came over and struck up conversation with Gray. Natsu wandered over to Happy, who was perched on the bar pestering Mirajane.

"I have something to talk to you about, partner."

"Natsu, I don't think you should go on another job yet," Happy said, dubious.

"It has nothing to do with that." Natsu glanced around: Mira walked off to serve drinks and there was no one else in their vicinity. He lowered his voice. "How many fish do I need to bribe you with for you to keep a really big secret?"

Happy looked offended. "You don't have to bribe me."

"Really?"

"Really."

Natsu took a deep breath. "I made out with Gray."

Happy fell off the bar.

"Happy!" Natsu exclaimed, leaping up to stare behind the counter. A few people looked around. He continued more quietly, "Are you okay?"

"Yes," Happy grumbled, rubbing his head. He fluttered back up to his seat and gave Natsu a hard glare. "Are you teasing me?"

Natsu held up his palms. "Totally serious."

As Happy continued to scrutinize him, Natsu's broad, silly grin escaped his control. He beamed.

That convinced the feline.

"You're in looooove," Happy whispered, ebullient. "Natsu is bluuuuuushing."

"Shut up," the Dragon Slayer snorted. "You won't tell anyone, right?"

"Sure. But why not?"

"We just don't want people to know right now." Natsu picked at the myriad scars layering his knuckles. "You're not upset, Happy?"

"You should've told me sooner." Happy crossed his blue arms. "Is he going to live with us?"

Natsu spluttered and almost fell off his stool.

"He can't have my fish," Happy went on, ignoring this reaction.

"Okay."

"And no making out in public."

"I just told you it's a secret!"

"No making out in front of me. That's what I meant."

Natsu tilted his head. "Why not?"

"Because you'll fight later like you always do and then I'll be sad. I don't want to be sad every time you fight."

That made Natsu blink.

"I didn't know you cared that much, Happy."

"Of course I care!" The Exceed looked hurt. "You're not allowed to break up with each other, Natsu. If you break my heart, I won't be able to believe in love anymore."

"Alright, alright." Natsu rolled his eyes and hugged him, both to comfort him and keep him quiet. "Gray and I can't break up because we're not dating. So it's all good."

"I guess that works." Happy frowned. "But you should solve that problem."

"Aye, sir," Natsu laughed, but his heart slammed into his rib cage like a bull elephant breaking down the door.

Gray didn't do relationships: everyone knew that. Of course, Gray also didn't go around kissing Natsu. This whole thing was different. They'd been dancing around each other for months. Gray had whispered I love you just yesterday—granted, Natsu's mouth had been on him at the time.

Natsu didn't know what Gray wanted out of this. He didn't even know why Gray was generally dead-set against romantic relationships or what terms would justify an exception. Natsu really wanted to be an exception.

The Salamander swallowed. When Mira returned to the bar, he quickly ordered a drink.

What did he, Natsu Dragneel, want? That was an even thornier question. He wanted Gray. And he wanted Gray to be happy. Shit, this was going to be hard.

Gray couldn't help being reserved as Loki chatted with him. Since Loki was always coy, it was hard to interpret his motives.

When Natsu vacated the table a few minutes later, Loki changed topics like he'd been waiting for this.

"I saw Saisho earlier this week," Loki said casually. "He said he hasn't seen you around the club in months."

Gray felt uneasiness flicker warnings in his brain.

"I stopped going."

"Really?" Loki looked surprised—which was reasonable, since Gray had a bit of a reputation at Magnolia's men's bar. "When was this?"

"Months ago."

Loki gaped at him. "Why?"

Gray grunted. Loki wasn't going to stop. "I just didn't feel like it anymore."

"You? Didn't feel like getting laid?" Loki snorted. "Give me a break."

"I didn't say that." Gray bristled, defensive. "I just moved on."

"Are you feeling okay?"

"I'm fine, Loki." Gray rolled his eyes. "Stop mothering my sex life. You can tell Saisho he may not see me for a while. I'm…busier with jobs these days."

Loki gave him the I'm-not-stupid look.

"Not still feeling guilty about the Salamander, are you?" Loki asked. His blue eyes snagged on Gray's.

The words sent a rebellious tremor through Gray. Damn you. He crossed his arms, gaze flicking to the pink hair on the other side of the room.

"What if I was?"

"I can think of some ways you could make it up to him." Loki grinned.

Gray's muscles hardened like ice. Not because he wasn't interested in those ways, but because Loki was talking about it. Those two men belonged to totally separate worlds for Gray. He wanted to keep it that way.

"Loki, what is it you came over here for?"

"Aha, I found it." Loki smirked.

Gray glared. "Found what?"

"The truth." Amusement played across Loki's features. "I can see we won't be starting up our arrangement again anytime soon. That's good: I came to tell you I've found someone else, and I didn't want you to feel shut out."

"Do as you wish." Gray waved a hand at him, a little disconcerted he had to say those words at all. Their arrangement had always revolved around an open door. "Good for you, finding someone."

"I could say the same." Loki's eyes crinkled in a sincere smile. "I'm glad for you, Gray-kun."

Gray humphed, feeling a mixture of frustration, exuberance, and wanting to sink through the floor. He didn't want to know what his face looked like right now.

"Just don't tell anyone about your totally unconfirmed suspicions," Gray mumbled at last. "Including Lucy. I don't want rumors."

"Tell anyone about what?" Loki grinned, rose, and walked off.

Gray put his head down on the table. Fucking immortals. It wasn't fair that they had eternal sexy youth and accrued centuries of people-reading skills.

"Oi, popsicle!"

Gray jerked up, fighting down a blush, then anger, then a smile. Natsu bit his lip like he was holding in laughter at this.

"What is it, flame breath?" Gray said, voice gravelly.

"You're coming with me. I need someone along with me or else Happy is threatening to lock me inside for a week. I don't need help," Natsu stressed, "I'm just doing this for Happy's peace of mind. Since this injury is your fault to begin with, you're the lucky winner."

Gray smirked, rising to follow the Dragon Slayer toward the door. "This is too good. You asking for help? How can I say no?"

"I am not asking for help!"

"And asking me of all people. That must rankle."

"Didn't I just explain this is all your fault, ice princess?" The ire on Natsu's face was endearing in its familiarity.

"Oh right. It's my fault because I beat your sorry ass in a fight." Gray grinned.

Natsu's mouth opened, but no words came out. Instead he punched Gray on the arm while Gray laughed.

Outside it was dry and cool. Gray followed Natsu along the blocks, not knowing or particularly caring where they were going. When they were out of range of any Fairy Tail ears, he spoke up.

"Very smooth back there, hothead."

Natsu glared. Gray loved that expression. It held no enmity, and Gray knew Natsu's anger existed right alongside his affection. That glare was something not many people besides Gray could conjure on the Dragon Slayer. It was another piece of their weird, contentious relationship.

"If you want to get me out of the guild, there are better ways," Gray went on, trying not to laugh as Natsu narrowed his eyes.

"Like what, snowflake?"

Gray, who didn't actually have any ideas, tried to look sagacious.

"Where are we going, anyway?" he asked.

"Happy demanded fish for dinner as a consolation. I didn't feel like sitting on the riverbank all by myself. And he really did tell me not to go alone. Worrywart."

"Consolation for what?" Gray asked.

"For startling him. I told him I kissed you."

"Wow, that was fast."

Natsu shrugged a nonchalant shoulder. "It's not like he wouldn't find out soon enough."

"Wait, you told him you kissed me? What about me kissing you?" Gray protested.

"I did it first." Natsu grinned. "That's the important one, right?"

They bickered back and forth all the way to Natsu's house, fully aware that they were only quarrelling because they were too shy to talk about making out. Gray couldn't remember ever feeling embarrassed about kissing before. Damn Natsu.

The conversation had turned into an intellectual argument over the best way to cook fish by the time they reached the river with tackle in tow.

Leafless trees interspersed with yellow maples overshadowed the bank. The water was a slow, cool burble. November in Magnolia was beautiful.

Natsu set up a pole and lay back in the dry grass, toes dangling in the water. Gray tugged off his shoes and sat down beside him.

"Doesn't it feel cold?" Gray asked, kicking at the water.

"You tell me," Natsu retorted.

"Nothing is cold to me, dimwit. But aren't you hot-blooded or something?"

"Yep. Exactly." Natsu grinned. "So what do I care if it's cold? I generate my own heat. Always have."

Gray propped himself back on his elbows, trying not to imagine sleeping curled next to that human heat. Pressing against that warmth without stupid clothes in the way. What it would feel like to take that heat in his mouth—

"Something's biting," he said in relief, nudging the Salamander toward his line.

Scrambling up, Natsu hurried to reel the prey in, only to lose it two seconds later.

"Not paying much attention, are you?" Gray chuckled.

"Staring at something else."

Gray, who could feel Natsu's eyes on him, blushed (which he realized later was exactly what Natsu wanted) and looked over. The Dragon Slayer had lain back in the grass, hands behind his head—black gaze fixed on Gray.

Heart beating fast, Gray leaned down and kissed him.

Natsu made a sound of surprise before running a hand through Gray's hair. The other hand slid down Gray's chest—when had he lost his shirt?—as Natsu took control and sucked Gray's lip. Damn, the fire mage knew how to possess someone.

When they broke apart, Gray teased, "Cute squeak, fire queen. Did I take you by surprise?"

Natsu snorted. "Your heart rate was a bit of a hint."

"My— You can hear that?"

"Mm. There's no ambient noise around here to cover it up. In the guild, I'd have to be sitting next to you."

Gray relaxed onto his back, staring up at the tree limbs. Well, that was good to know. Fat chance ever hiding emotions from Natsu.

The wind ghosted over them, making Natsu shiver and burst into flame.

"Shit!" Gray jumped sideways.

"Sorry," Natsu mumbled, fire winking out to be replaced by an embarrassed flush.

Gray laughed at him.

It was satisfyingly strange: Gray felt happy even when he wasn't sucking the Salamander's face. Everything was pleasant and he was content just lying here. Given the chance, he would stay here all day.

That was a new feeling.

Gray's loose fingers rested between them as the ice mage stared up, lost in the sky. After a moment of narrow-eyed thinking, Natsu grabbed his hand.

"Is this okay?" he asked.

"Yes, of course it is," Gray said, rolling his eyes, but his cheeks reddened.

"Do you not usually hold hands?" Natsu chuckled.

"I've never held your hand before, flame brain." The side of Gray's mouth was fighting a losing battle against a smile.

"With anyone else?"

In an instant, the smile vanished and Gray's face shuttered. "I don't think we should talk—"

"All I care about," Natsu interrupted, "is that you're not with anyone else while we're…" Natsu waved his free hand, "together."

Gray's body went taut as a tripwire. Natsu, who was in the process of rolling onto an elbow facing him, got a nice view of Gray's abs tensing. The hard lines disappearing into Gray's pants distracted him for several seconds.

"Are we...together?" Gray asked. His voice had gone quiet.

Natsu suddenly felt stiff and on high alert. Like reality was about to sock him and burn down everything he wanted.

Like all of this had been a lie.

"Do you want to be?" he asked.

"Do you?"

Natsu took a deep breath and looked Gray full in the face. "Yes."

Apprehension released around Gray's eyes. He exhaled through thin lips, and then looked down as if ashamed.

Natsu found his cracked voice and managed, "Gray?"

The black-haired boy raised his eyes slowly, like Natsu was forcing him out of hiding. He looked scared.

Before Natsu could say anything, Gray kissed him. They were both lying on their sides now, chests flat against each other. The only signal Natsu had to go by was Gray's quick heartbeat.

"We speak better with our bodies, don't we?" Natsu said, as Gray's breath grazed his face.

"Mm." Sheepish, Gray raised his free hand and pushed black hair out of his eyes. "Guess so."

"Well, I have something to say then."

Wrapping a hand around Gray's neck, Natsu captured his mouth passionately, his other hand sliding up Gray's leg. Natsu loved how he could hear Gray's lungs seize up.

"Did you get all that?" Natsu asked, pulling away.

Gray gaped.

"You...might have to tell me a second time."

Natsu kissed the ice mage again, ignoring the pain in his sternum. His hand curled against Gray's chest, nails scraping over skin. Gray's breath stuttered.

Gods, I want you.

"How about that time?" Natsu asked.

Gray closed his eyes, unable to stop his grin.

"I don't know if I can hear you," he panted.

"Gods damn it, Gray!" Natsu exclaimed. "Will you be my boyfriend?"

Without moving, Gray opened his eyes. They were inches apart. "On one condition."

Natsu watched the serious boy with nervous expectation.

"You have to be mine, too," Gray said.

As Natsu let out the breath he'd been holding, Gray burst into ridiculous laughter and squeezed his hand.

"Fuck you," Natsu said shakily, trying and failing to look mad.

Cutting off Gray's reply, which sounded like, please do, Natsu rolled on top of his boyfriend and kissed him into oblivion.

Natsu deliberately tried to infuriate Gray. Grinding into him, Natsu ran his hands all over him, so close to tempting places. He knocked the ice mage over onto his back, and when Gray attempted to flip them over, Natsu grabbed his wrists and pinned Gray's legs with his own.

"Nope, mine," he growled, scratching his nails sharply down Gray's skin. Gray made a noise of half-protest, so Natsu sucked Gray's tongue into his mouth to keep him occupied.

Natsu's chest started hurting, like it always did, but he waited until a particularly painful twinge before pulling back, Gray's mouth chasing after him. The Salamander took a focused breath, waiting for the throbbing to abate.

You, he told his injury, are like a small whiny child who keeps interrupting their parents when they try to fuck.

Above Gray, Natsu's face screwed up, eyes closed.

"Are you alright?" Gray asked automatically.

"I am not weak," Natsu coughed, shooting him a warning look.

"Trust me," Gray snorted, "I'd never make the mistake of thinking you were. I'm not stupid."

Natsu blinked in surprise.

"What," Gray said, "you think I'd underestimate an enemy?"

"Enemy?" Natsu growled, putting them nose to nose. "Is that what I am?"

Not anymore.

"Just how many kisses will it take to persuade you otherwise?" Natsu asked.

"You persuaded me five minutes ago when you talked. Believe it or not, bodies can't say everything." Gray snickered. "It's called using your words, hot stuff."

Natsu heaved a warm sigh past his ear.

"You want words? I can give you words." Natsu pulled up so he could look down at him, hands planted on either side of Gray's shoulders. "I like you, Gray. I've been trying to get your attention for ages, but you are thicker than Erza's armor and refused to get it. I kissed you months ago, ice breath, and gave you plenty of opportunities to do or say something since then."

"What? Did not!"

"Did too. This probably never would've happened if you hadn't accidentally tried to kill me, and that only happened because you were cranky that day in the woods, I got pissed and yelled at you, and then proceeded to feel guilty about it like an idiot. So really," he punched Gray's good shoulder, "anything you missed out on is your fault, snowflake."

"See now," Gray raised his eyebrows, "that would've been a lot clearer if you'd used your words in the first place."

Natsu threw his hands into the air.

"Also," Gray went on, "I was not 'cranky,' I was fucking pissed. The Scarlet Terror told me to drag you away from your girlfriend in a situation that I was told would be intimate. I may be a pervert in other ways, but I do not enjoy watching other people suck face. Especially," Gray coughed, "not you."

Natsu was blinking at him, trying to catch up.

"But I don't have a girlfriend," he said at last, somewhat bewildered.

"Apparently. Once again, I would have known that if you used your words."

Natsu sighed. "There's no winning with you."

"Of course not, slant eyes," Gray snorted. "It's me, after all. Besides..."

Gray raised himself up to kiss Natsu's throat. Gray's voice softened.

"Haven't you already won what you wanted?"

Natsu groaned.

"I didn't expect that reaction," Gray said, rubbing his thumb over the same bit of skin.

"Actually that was me running out of words for you, princess. Didn't I tell you earlier you only get grunts from here on out?"

Gray smirked. He wondered if Natsu knew when he was making innuendos.

"I guess I can work with grunts," Gray said evilly.

He pulled Natsu down onto him and kissed him again, biting Natsu's lips.

But despite his words, his mouth worked slowly, because something was niggling his brain. Natsu had brought up his history. Gray didn't know how to explain who he was and what this, right here, meant for him in context.

That was also confusing because, even though it had never mattered with anyone else before, he really wanted Natsu to understand. Gray generally thought your history was your own business. But he wanted Natsu to get him—to know Gray and understand this about him.

Gods, that was a sign he was in way too deep.

"Just so you know," Gray began tentatively when they took a breath, "and I only say this because you brought it up…I've been with a lot of people, but I haven't dated a lot of people. I've never actually had a boyfriend before. You're…my first."

Natsu wasn't quite as surprised as Gray expected.

"Good, me neither. Now I don't have to pretend," the Dragon Slayer teased.

"You don't have to pretend anything. Please don't pretend with me. I'm confused enough already and I have no fucking clue what I'm doing. Gods." Gray scrubbed a hand across his face. "We're going to be a fucking disaster, aren't we?"

Natsu just hummed happily, making a smile spread across Gray's mouth.

Natsu rolled off of him, moving with care and some wincing, though Gray wisely didn't comment on it this time. Lying beside him, Natsu intertwined their fingers and Gray realized how hot and sweaty Natsu's hand was.

Gray felt smug: he'd always enjoyed having an effect on others, but it was even better when it was Natsu. His rival. Someone whose opinion mattered to him.

Suddenly, the other boy's head swooped into view. Natsu bit the ice mage's collarbone and Gray let out a yelp. The Dragon Slayer kissed him into silence for several hot minutes, then flopped back down beside him.

"Um?" Gray asked, gasping.

"Just keeping you on your toes."

Gray snorted and shook his head. He couldn't seem to stop smiling and he knew the Salamander could hear every crash of his thundering pulse.

They could hear something else too. They both looked over just as the fishing pole was tugged from its wedged spot on the bank into the river.

"Gods damn it," Natsu sighed. "There goes Happy's dinner. Shit, I can't tell him you're my boyfriend if there aren't any fish involved."

Trying not to laugh, Gray looked over at him.

"Guess we'll have to find something else to do, hothead."

Natsu's grin turned roguish. "That shouldn't be too hard."

A/N: Thank you for reading and all your lovely comments! I've greatly enjoyed this. The first chapter of the sequel, Overcome, is going up as soon as I post this (iow, within the hour!).