First off, I apologize for the lengthy wait. I hit a bad case of writer's block and struggled to get this written in a way I was happy with. But alas it seems to have cleared. We have reached the end of this story, but to those of you who were asking, there might be a companion piece from Chloe's POV. When? I have no idea.
As usual, thank you to my amazing girlfriend for being my beta putting up with me being a zombie for the better part of a week as I tried to get this written. 3 You're the best.
A special shout-out to Isadora for being my sounding board and the endless amount of cheerleading and to Emily for the advice and cheering me up yesterday with her awesome writing. You guys rock!
Lastly, thank you to everyone who reviewed, followed, favorited and left kudos, you guys make it all worthwhile.
On with the story, enjoy!
First, she stopped breathing.
'Hi! Any interest in joining our a cappella group?'
Then reality hit her like a ton of bricks, square in the face. Oh no. Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. This had to be some kind of sick twisted joke.
'Help turn our dreams into a reality?'
It was like watching through an old, skipping roll of film. The memories kept coming, fast and burning, re-branding themselves in Beca's brain, digging the stake in her heart in deeper. The look in Chloe's eyes just about killed her.
'How high does your belt go?'
'I think, that we're gonna be really fast friends.'
The puzzle pieces started falling into place right in front of her but the picture they were painting was one Beca didn't want to see the finished product of.
'You are going to make someone so happy someday, Chloe Beale. Don't you dare give up on that.'
She wondered how much more resistant she'd have been to the idea of coming to Barden at all, knowing then she'd meet her soulmate here.
She also couldn't help but think about all the what-if's and could have been's. About how different that first meeting at the activities fair would've gone if she'd had her timer. When they locked eyes across the quad and her heart literally skipped a beat. She remembered, even now, moving as if on auto-pilot drawn in by those unfairly gorgeous, blue eyes.
What was it that thing her father had said as she was leaving? 'The timer won't tell you who to love, Bec. It just… confirms what you already know.'
Fuck. Didn't she already know, somewhere buried in the deep recess of her heart, that it was never going to work with Jesse? Hadn't she figured out long ago her feelings for her best friend went far deeper than those of just a close friendship?
She thought about all the years of uncertainty and all the tears shed on her account. Tears that were currently streaming down Chloe's face unimpeded.
It was that thought registering in her brain that made Beca snap out of her reprieve. Pandemonium had exploded around them in a cacophony of shouts and exclamations she could just about make sense of. Where before the room seemed to move in slow-motion, now it felt like it was spinning at warp-speed, out of control. Questions kept coming left and right and she wasn't sure but Emily seemed to be crying.
When did you get a timer!?
You got a timer?
When did yours start counting down?
No fucking way.
Someone grabbed hold of her arm to push her sleeve up and presumably take a look at her timer herself. Jessica, Beca belatedly realized. She shook herself out of the girl's grasp and stood.
Beca's first instinct was to run. Run far away and possibly never look back, but she could never stand to see Chloe crying least of all when she knew those tears were because of her.
She stepped forward but it only made Chloe take a step back.
"Chloe," came out in a sort of whispered croak Beca didn't recognize as her own voice.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Chloe asked, her voice tiny and vulnerable. Heartbreak played out over her features clear as day.
Beca wanted so much to gather her in her arms and just make it go away. The urge was so strong—stronger than she ever remembered it being—it actually surprised her. Where the hell were all these feelings coming from all of a sudden?
"Why didn't you?" Answering a question with a question. Not cowardly at all. Beca was suddenly acutely aware of the fact that they were in a room full of people. She could feel the Bellas' attention intently focused on them, it pressed against her from all sides making the room feel ten times smaller. "No offense guys, but can you, like, scram?" She called over her shoulder.
The Bellas snapped into action, hastily filing out of the room, practically falling over themselves to get away from the increasingly tense atmosphere.
Once alone it seemed they couldn't meet each other's eye. The air in the room seemed to crackle and splinter with the growing tension.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Chloe asked again, softly, as she moved into the room, setting down her bag in the entryway.
Beca sighed as she sat on the arm of the couch. "I didn't wanna hurt you," she mumbled, half hoping Chloe wouldn't hear her.
The twitch of Chloe's lips told her she'd been heard.
"Why didn't you?" She asked looking up at Chloe through her eyelashes. "You've been waiting for so long, I figured you'd be dying to tell everyone immediately."
Chloe walked to stand in front of her, nudging Beca's knees apart with one of her own. She promptly made herself at home in the cradle of Beca's legs and looped her arms around Beca's neck.
Beca couldn't resist the urge to reach up and brush her thumbs under Chloe's eyes to wipe the tears away and let her hand linger on a damp cheek. Chloe leaned into the touch and Beca's heart gave a hard thud in her chest at the little sigh that escaped Chloe's lips as new tears met Beca's palm. "Fuck, please don't cry."
"I was fourteen when I got mine, Becs," Chloe said, whispered low and unevenly through the tears. "I've been waiting for this moment for almost eleven years."
Beca felt her heart break into a million little pieces. Sudden, frantic desperation rose in her chest and the overwhelming need to go back in time and slap her thirteen-year-old self until she agreed to get the stupid chip implanted was actually, physically stifling. Apologies were tumbling out of her lips in an instant as she gripped the back of Chloe's shirt hard. "I'm so, so, so sorry Chloe." She unconsciously tipped forward, her forehead nestling in the crook of Chloe's neck.
"You didn't know."
But I should have, was the thought that immediately took hold. "I hurt you, for so long and I'm always gonna be sorry about that. I don't ever want you to feel like that again."
"What do we do now?"
A humorless snort of laughter made it past Beca's lips, "hell if I know, Beale."
In the relative silence of the room and with her emotions more or less settling, Beca felt strangely exposed in the open space even though they were alone. As alone as they could be with the girls no doubt trying to eavesdrop on them. She broke away from their embrace slowly and looked into Chloe's eyes searchingly.
There was pain swirling in those baby blues, made brighter by the tears, but underneath it, Beca could see a sort of peaceful serenity that had been missing before. She reached out to tuck a stray lock of hair behind Chloe's ear. "We'll figure it out."
Beca wordlessly led Chloe back to her room, hands firmly clasped together. They settled into Chloe's bed in a tangle of limbs, seeking each other's comfort and familiarity.
Chloe burrowed deeper into Beca's chest with a shuddering breath that soon turned into body-wracking sobs.
Beca tightened her hold on Chloe, whispering reassurances into her ear. "It's okay, you're okay. I've got you; let it all out. You're okay, we're okay and we're gonna figure this out, I promise."
"I now present to you Barden University's graduating class of 2015!"
An explosion of jubilant shouts erupted around Beca as her vision was overwhelmed by her fellow graduate's Barden green caps and gowns. As the euphoria of the moment died down she searched for her Bellas in the mass of people.
She knew Emily and Aubrey were somewhere in the crowd of spectators and because they were seated alphabetically, most of the girls were near the front. Her phone soon started vibrating with incoming messages to the group chat as she pushed her way through the throng of students and family toward the stage nearby where she figured Chloe would be. Beca scanned her surroundings for Chloe's signature red hair but came up empty.
CR [4:15PM]: Where you pitches at? Already found Legs.
Attached was a selfie with Stacie where she pressed a sloppy kiss to Cynthia-Rose's cheek.
Fat-Amy [4:15PM]: Got the aca-child w/ me.
DJ B [4:16PM]: Meet you guys back at the house in a few.
She exited the group chat and pulled up her message thread with Chloe.
Where are you? Almost out front, can't see you :(
A body collided with hers and arms wound around her mid-drift from behind tightly. A familiar pair of lips made its presence known on her neck briefly. "Hi!"
"Hey, you." Beca turned in Chloe's arms to be met with a brilliant smile. Chloe had several inches on her thanks to her heels and Beca had to look up at her a little bit. She looped her arms around Chloe's neck loosely, drawing her in for a kiss. "You're officially a college graduate, how's it feel?"
"Freeing," Chloe answered.
"I bet… Come take a walk with me?"
She intertwined her fingers with Chloe's leading them away from the ceremony grounds and toward Barden Pond. They made idle chatter on the way and Beca hoped she didn't seem as nervous as she felt.
In the weeks since finding out they were soulmates, there had been plenty of conversations. Where they were going, what it meant for them—individually and together, where to even begging to repair the damages that had been done.
They were still figuring out their path but one thing Beca had made clear from the beginning: wherever they went, whatever came next they would face it together. Yet, she still felt like there was more she could do solidify her commitment. They'd be traveling to Copenhagen in a week and after that, it was all still very much up in the air.
It terrified her that their post-Barden plans might still take them in very different directions.
Beca heaved a sigh as they neared the edge of the pond. She led them toward a massive Oak tree that offered plenty of shade and sat down with her back against the trunk and patted the space next to her where Chloe promptly settled in.
"So, I've been thinking about… us and," she pointed at the space between them, "this."
Chloe bit her bottom lip and smiled softly, "And?" She prompted.
"And I want you to know," she reached for Chloe's hand and brought it up to her lips to place a lingering kiss along her knuckles, "I'm one-hundred percent committed to us. No matter what, Chlo."
"I know."
Beca sighed again, willing herself to follow through with her plan. She reached into the depths of her robe where she'd had Stacie sew a pocket where she could keep her phone along with her present for Chloe.
Chloe gasped when Beca produced the small box she'd stashed inside her robe before leaving the house.
She turned it around in her hands before she nervously lifted her gaze to Chloe's.
"Beca…"
Beca audibly swallowed and opened the box.
Chloe's eyes widened as she examined the ring nestled inside. Sunlight filtered through the branches making it sparkle, "Beca what-"
"Chill, I'm not, like, proposing or anything. It's not, it's not an engagement ring," Beca said with an eye roll. She kept her eyes on the ring as she talked, "It's um, it's a promise ring."
Beca heard Chloe's sigh of relief but she couldn't bring herself to make eye contact. Not yet. She had to say her peace first. "It's not a promise of marriage or whatever either. It's my promise that, no matter what happens you'll have me in your corner. I don't know what's out there for us in a month or a year or a decade, but I know I don't ever want you to feel alone. Not to be cheesy…er, but if you'll let me, I'll be your flashlight." She released a teary laugh that Chloe echoed a second later.
Beca finally made herself look Chloe in the eye again, "I'm always gonna be there to make sure you're safe and protected and cared for," she took the ring out of the box and rang her thumb over the engraving on the inside of the band.
Always.
"Whatever that means. Whatever you need from me. Always."
With trembling hands, Beca slipped the ring over Chloe's left ring finger, it caught on her knuckle for a moment before it settled in its new home. "I love you, Chloe Beale."
"Oh, Beca Mitchell," Chloe leaned forward meeting Beca halfway for a bruising kiss. Her hand slid into Beca's hair to keep her firmly in place as the kiss reached it's natural, comfortable end. "I love you too."