When The Rain Falls

by: OurAwakening

I haven't seen him since then. All the love, and all the hate, I can't help but think about him. He was my best friend, my love, my life. He once told me that rain was special to him. That the rain was a release of anger, sadness... and the reminder of me whenever he felt lonely. I messed up though, and I mean that I messed up so bad, that I made him leave me... and it was my fault. So now when I see clouds, and when I see rain... I think of the one wolf that was my life. Humphrey.

After our adventure from coming back from Idaho, I knew that therefore... that I loved him. His optimistic vibe and the quality of true love put me in a trance whenever I looked at him in the eyes. For once in my life, I knew that someone loved me back beside my parents and my sister. Through the small argument of the Western and Eastern packs, they were ready for me to marry. I said no to Garth and moved on asking everyone to just move on and that it's not going to happen. It was only a few weeks later that Humphrey asked to marry me. From the wonderful experiences of log boarding, rescuing me from various situations, and just being there for me whenever I needed him, it was a definite yes.

I was finally able to feel free. Humphrey tried to make me happy and as optimistic as he was. It wasn't long until Humphrey changed the way he always was. He seemed extremely sad, and he must've felt like nobody cared about him, that he was an outcast. I found him walking over to the edge of the valley worried that he'll do something stupid like most omegas do. "Humphrey... what are you doing?" I asked. Humphrey didn't respond but continued to look down at the dark green grass, while the water ran down his head, and the wind blew his fur back.

"Rain... the only thing that makes me feel free of all the negative emotions that I bottle up inside me." Humphrey implied. He caught my attention. He spoke in a morbid voice, like he was just... well for him, abnormally sad. "Is there something you haven't told me, Humphrey?" I asked. Humphrey nodded his head. "I feel hopelessness all the time. More specifically..." Humphrey started to tear up a little. "Depressed. I've been depressed for 5 years." Humphrey replied. "Have you at least been getting help, Humphrey?" I asked. "I did but... I can't afford the medicine and treatments for so long... apparently, nobody cares that I have a serious condition and nobody will help me." Humphrey said about to cry.

I stood there in absolute shock and said nothing. Humphrey finally pulled himself together and continued speaking. "Nobody cares that I've been harassed, bullied, and rejected almost every single day of my life. Driven to the point where I've tried to kill myself 8 times, but unfortunately saved all 8 times by my friends, who don't care about me anymore because I'm depressed." Humphrey explained. I could only stand there and hold Humphrey's left paw. I then looked at the rain, and could only think of Humphrey, the real Humphrey.

After I took Humphrey home to his den and I made it back to mine I was stopped by my parents. "Kate, we're going to have to ask you to leave that useless Omega," Winston said. I wondered why and tilted my head a little to the left. "You are going to marry Garth, and that's final. No excuses, now you obey us and break up with that Omega." Eve explained. I knew that I couldn't disobey my parents and that I couldn't possibly let them be angry at me, it was practically suicide.

The next day, I only thought about how Humphrey would react. I dreaded this all night long. I finally found Humphrey in his den. "Humphrey... I... you... OK, I'm sorry but... I have to break up with you." I said. Humphrey looked at me with a sad surprise combo look. "My parents are making me marry Garth and I can't disobey them. I'm sorry." I said about to cry. I stood there to see if Humphrey would say anything, but he was speechless. I ran back to my den bawling my eyes out.

My parents tried to calm me down, and they got me to go to my room. I decided to go onto JasperMedia (I couldn't think of a better social media name) and see what people were doing. I soon noticed a live stream that hasn't been named with everyone my age in Jasper park watching it, but also people in the live chat were saying that they knew what this was and that they had their parents watching as well.

The screen suddenly turned on to Humphrey, crying. "I'm the real Humphrey. Depressed, unwanted, and unloved. I don't know why everyone hates me so much, but I do too since everyone who's cool hates Humphrey. And right now, I don't really see any kind of reason for trying, talking, or... for breathing. I've just had enough, my limit has been reached. So that's it I guess... bye." Humphrey said. I immediately took out my phone and tried to call Humphrey, five times, but he didn't pick up.

I sprinted to Humphrey's den. But I was too late. Humphrey had died right in his den... and overdosed on Celexa, an SSRI, a depression drug (sorry if that's wrong or if it doesn't make sense). I collapsed to the ground and started sobbing as loud as I possibly could. The next day, everything was canceled. Humphrey was on everyone's minds. Humphrey was going to be buried next to his parents at the edge of Western Jasper, and while everyone stood there with sadness, I said as loud as I could, "Thanks, for everything Humphrey. If only wolves didn't care about being popular, and or the leaders of society, you might have lived."

So now 10 years later, I stand alone, like Humphrey, and every time I think of Humphrey, I go to the place where he told me that he was depressed. Everyone eventually forgot about Humphrey, but there were times when they were reminded and felt ashamed. For me, I never forgot Humphrey... and when I think of him, it's When The Rain Falls.

"It's crazy how much one person can fuck you up, mentally."

OurAwakening