Part 1

Difficult Times

She was standing her ground, she knew she was wrong but was not going to give in anyway. The sun had already settled a few hours ago but she just came home because work had taken longer than she had expected when she told her friend to go home to her kids and she'd take care of her stuff as well. She hadn't noticed time flying by as she was deep in thoughts. The radio had been playing quietly in the background playing music. She had really lost track of time, when she heard the vibrating of her phone inside of her purse.

She picked it up without looking who was calling. "Where the hell are you?" Antonio's with anger filled voice shot through the line. Sylvie was taken aback by his sudden outburst, so much, she almost dropped her mobile.

"Still at work." She snapped back. "Come down will ya. I have a lot of work. I just lost track of time."

"We said we have dinner together tonight. I cooked."

"I am so sorry Hon. I totally forgot."

"Don't Hon me Sylvie. You better make this up to me or...-" "Or WHAT?" Screaming into the phone, Sylvie stood up not carrying that her chair fell over at her sudden reaction.

The line went dead.

Stunned that he hung up on her, she picked up the chair and decided to leave. She knew the moment she'd arrive at home, things would pick up where the call was left off. She wasn't up for another fight, praying that he maybe had gone to sleep already she parked her car in the driveway, grabbed her coat from the passanger seat next to her and got out of the car.

Opening the door she walked inside the townhouse she owned. The house was still lit but Antonio was nowhere to be seen. Throwing her handbag to the floor, she got rid of her shoes and coat by throwing them to the floor, making as little noise as possible.

She found him sitting on one of the wooden chairs at the dinning room table. The table was beautifully set, the candles he must have lit hours ago, were burned down, drops of wax had hardenend on the golden tablecloth that was beautifully laid on to the half glass, half wooden table. His gaze was hard, his body on edge. "I can't keep doing this." There was no more anger in his voice just sadness.

She felt the sharp pain go through her body as if someone was stabbing her. "What are you saying?" His eyes bored into hers, she could see how he tried to controll his anger.

"Antonio please, I had just a lot of work. I will remember next time."

"I thougt Cindy was working today as well, couldn't she jump in for once?"

"She did, I sent her home so she could be with her family." She said apologetic.

"And what about your family? Huh? Am I nothing to you anymore?" Sitting there calmly he let his head fall down to his chest, shaking it.

Defeated, silence filled the room. Tears dropping down to the livingroom floor. He stood, head held high, he walked past her. "Antonio..." "Not tonight." Putting on his coat and picking up his black dufflebag she now noticed being next to the front door, he left, shutting the door loudly behind him.

Crying she let herself drop to the floor, letting out all the emotions she had held back.

Days went by slowly, she hadn't eaten since the evening Antonio walked out on her. She had lost weight, her skin was pale, almost white. She looked like crap and she didn't do anything to hide it. She just didn't care. She pushed herself to go to work everyday even though she just wanted to stay at home in her bed hiding under the sheets until this whole nightmare would be over. But that wasn't going to happen, she was well aware of that. Sylvie had lost track on the number of how many times she had called Antonio's cell these past few days. He had never picked up once, but she kept on calling.

He didn't answer.

She tossed her phone into the nearest wall, regretting it a second later. It scattered to the floor leaving pieces all over the place. Great now she needed to buy a new one. As if she had the time and the money to do that. Well she had time, because cleaning up, she had done whenever she felt the need to forget, so apart from the phone on the floor, it was clean, to clean.

Grabbing her coat, she left her apartment, got into her car, and drove into the city. It was a beautiful day, the sun stood high in the sky. It warmed her body through the windows of her car. She arrived after a few minutes of driving and was lucky to find a parking spot near the mall she had planned to go.

The store was crowded, she waited in line and was soon annoyed of people bumping into her. She was about to say something when a familiar voice called her name. Turning around she spotted Gabby and Kelly who had just entered the store together. "Hy guys. What are you doing here together?" Curiously she waited for an answer.

"Kelly here, is helping me to find a birthday present for Matt." She patted Severide's shoulder and smiled at Sylvie. "What are you doing here?" Severide looked her up and down as if he knew that something was up. She hadn't seen her friends in a few weeks, and it seemed like Antonio hadn't talked to them either because it looked like they didn't know that he had left her.

"Broke my phone."

Gabby's phone was ringing, she excused herself and went outside to take the call.

"Are you sure you're ok?" Kelly asked concern swinging in his voice. "You look bad."

"Yes I'm ok. I'm up next. I call you sometime this week with my new phone." Faking a smile she hoped would convince him, she added. "Bye."

"Bye." He leaned in and pressed a chaste kiss on her cheek before leaving the store.

She could fool everyone around her, but not herself. Deep down she knew her marriage was over the moment Antonio had walked out on her. He had given her many chances and as hard as it was to admitt, she hadn't taken them. She had thought he was just saying these things so she might change, never ever would she have thought he would leave her. Had they always had such a strong love and bond.

They had met right after she got her new job at the law firm she was still working, only had she then been the rookie and not the boss like she was today. It had taken her a lot of long nights and hard working hours to be where she was now.

She had bumped into him as he was walking on the sidewalk deep in thoughts, she remembered how young he looked back then, how young they both were. Falling flat on her ass after the crash, she looked at him, looked into his beautiful brown eyes. He wore a black leather jacket that day, a grey shirt underneath compaired with a blue jeans and sneakers. She remembered just sitting on the cold stony ground watching him. Smiling he helped her to stand up. When his hand touched hers, she could feel electricity lingering in the air surrounding them.

"I'm sorry." He had said after a while pulling her up and into his chest, like it was the most normal thing to do. She felt his hard chest under all that clothing, smiling up to him but somehow having lost her ability to speak.

She had to call him again. Try to win him back. After all they went through together this couldn't be it, this was not how it was supposed to end. They were meant for each other, she knew that, deep down she knew.

What had she done, when had her job become more important than her marriage? She couldn't remember when things had started to change, she just knew that it wasn't supposed to go this way. She had to find out where he was staying, clearly it wasn't at his sisters.

She had no clue where he was staying. So she had no other choice as to call Severide. She picked up the phone and dialed his number.

"Hey Sylvie, I was just about to call you..." Pause. "Heard what happend."

"It's ok really, I'm fine." She lied.

"No you're not. I saw you the other day, remember? You didn't look fine, and now I know why." She heard him suck in a deep breath before he continued. "Why didn't you say something? I am here for you."

"I know Kelly, thanks. Actually you really can help me with something... Do you know where Antonio is staying?"

"I think he's at a motel. Saw him the other day at Molly's and overheard him talking to Voight."

It was quiet for a moment. She heard Kelly breathing on the other end of the line but didn't give it any attention.

"Sylvie? Still here?"

"Yes. Sorry, I was just thinking of something."

"Wanna go grab a drink? Get your mind off of things?" He asked.

"I don't know..." Cutting her of midsentence he spoke. "C'mon, you need to get out a little, live a little. There is nothing you can do about your situation tonight anyway, so let's grab a drink at Molly's."

She was struggeling inside. She knew her friend was right, she sure could need some company and someone to talk to, also a glass of white wine sounded very tempting. "Ok. Pick me up please, I plan on drinking tonight. " She decided in a moment of weakness.

"See you in an hour." Then the line went dead.

There wasn't much going on at Molly's. Severide was walking through the door behind her, she could feel his hand on her lower back, guiding her. Her slender legs carried her through the almost empty bar her friends owned. The smell of cheap booze hung in the air and matched the dark mood she was in.

They sat down at a table near the bar, she suspected so Kelly could make sure that she always had a drink standing in front of her. He sat down opposite from her, carefully eying her.

"Is there something in my face?"

Smiling he said "No, I was just thinking that you look like crap."

"Well, thank you very much." She said indignantly.

"You're very welcome." Her smile grew wider and soon they were laughing. "There she is... Sylvie is back." Kelly said as the laugther had faded. "I missed you." She said and meant it. She couldn't remember when she last went out. All she ever did was working. "Bring me a glass of white wine?" With doggy eyes, she added "Pleease?"

Kelly just smiled and shook his head as he got up from his stool and made his way over to the bar. Sylvie looked after him.

His back reminded her of the memory which was long forgotten. Kelly's broad torso turned into Antonio's in front of her inner eye.

Smiling she walked away, but turing back to look at the man who she just had walked into. His back was to her. His leather jacket, was moving in sink with his steps.

She should have talked to him sooner, Kelly turned out to be quite a good listener.

Loud noise coming from the bar got her attention and pulled her out of her thoughts quickly. Kelly was shouting, pushing someone.

"Leave her the hell alone!"

"Get lost or I'll arrest you." Her whole body stiftend as she identified the voice as Antonio's.

"Give her some time man." Sylvie watched as Kelly held up his hands in surrender, taking a step back.

"Mind your own fucking buisness." Antonio hissed and walked away, kicking away an empty chair who was blocking his way. She followed him with her eyes as he used the back door to get out of the bar.

"What was that about?" Sylvie asked as soon as Kelly sat down on their table again, placing a glass of wine in front of her. "As promised." She thanked him and took a sip of the cold liquor. Kelly waited until she had put the glass back down before he started telling her what just had happend.

"He was pissed that you came here with me." He started, his tone flat but his eyes focused on Sylvie's. "I told him that we're here as friends and that I had no intention doing something behind his back but he got into my face, throwing accusations before I even could explain." Kelly paused a second, she watched him sucking in a deep breath. "Maybe he was right." He almost wispered that part, and his eyes got lost somewhere for a second. "What do you mean?" Lifting his head up again, he found her eyes, blue met blue. "Maybe I still like you."

Sylvie couldn't believe what he was saying. Was he saying he still had feelings for her? But they haven't seen each other so long. Did she just not notice. Shocked she moved away from him, her back hitting the wall behind her chair. "Kelly..." He looked at her, sweet and sad. She could see the angst of rejection behind his eyes as he kept looking at her. She didn't know what happend in that moment, all she knew was that she wasn't going to waste another minute not knowing what could have been if things would have worked out between them.

"Then let's find out!"