Obligatory Disclaimer: The series Naruto is owned by Masashi Kishimoto; I only own my OCs, picture, and this story.

Chapter 36: Of Living Limbo

Once he'd said his piece Orochimaru dismissed us, shooting a knowing glance in my direction before disappearing with a wayward gust. Good riddance. The other genin only regarded his exit briefly before turning to me, Shichirou with mute curiosity and Anko with unhidden excitement, sentiments that I didn't share. My thoughts were running on an endlessly tiring loop and I didn't want to stay in this rigged training ground for a second longer.

Thankfully, before Anko could rush me with another demand to spar, Shichirou spoke up.

"Um, sensei didn't mention it, but we usually do missions in the village between our main missions with him," the young boy began, ignoring the pout from his teammate and I turned to him fully.

"And I assume he plays no role in these domestic missions?"

A redundant question to be sure but I needed intel. Not only on him but his students as well; it was in my best interest to learn about them as individuals and how they viewed the Sanin and each other. To see if he had already brainwashed them. It was essentially weapons gathering - an important piece of information could be as deadly or beneficial as a well thrown kunai in this world.

"Of course," Anko butted in, hands on her hips. "Sensei's work is too important to be stopped by such 'obtuse' tasks."

That was probably one of the first 'lessons' he had imparted onto his students. Figures.

"I suppose that makes sense," I said, running my fingers through Riku's coat, who hadn't strayed from my side even with the Sanin's supposed disappearance.

"Is there anything else I should be aware of?"

Shichirou scratched the bridge of his nose, causing his glasses to mush against his eyebrows.

"Not really. Orochimaru-sensei values self-study and efficiency above everything else. If you can't keep up- you'll be replaced."

Of course the sanin would only want the best- or at the very least those with potential. I could see that with Anko especially, a prodigy in her own right. Shichirou, just by the way he spoke and held himself, was aggressively unassuming compared to his counterpart, but he at the very least had a level-headedness she lacked. Honestly, he seemed like the sort of person Orochimaru would have replaced, or made disappear, a long time ago but maybe he saw something useful in him, if only as another pawn.

"Alright, understood." I nodded to him in thanks.

"Shun-san usually led us, but now that he's gone-"

"I'll take the reigns!" Anko interrupted. "I'd be in charge already if Shu-chan hadn't been so pushy!"

Shichirou frowned. "He did though, remember? And you got us lost on the border of Kusa-"

"That was just a fluke," she huffed, jabbing a finger into his chest, causing him to lean back.

I simply shook my head as Riku let out a huff. It was kind of relieving to see them be so normal, as normal as child soldiers could be, with a teacher who was objectively not. I stepped forward, gaining their attention immediately.

"If I may interject?"

When they didn't resume their spat, I continued. "Perhaps we can figure who is to lead by going on a few home missions today- so we may get a better feel for one another."

They looked at me for a moment silently before nodding simultaneously and as we began to walk back to the village center, I ignored their whispers of how alike Shun I was.

Hopefully, this would go as painlessly as possible.

...

The result of our home missions was an abysmal success.

There was a discernible power struggle between the remaining genin of Orochimaru's team. Anko was too smart for her own good and that brilliance caused her to overthink, trying to complete tasks in overly creative ways that made finishing them thrice as long. Shichirou was also smart, that of which I had no doubt; Orochimaru wouldn't have kept him for long otherwise. However, his lack of assertiveness was often a stepping stone for Anko's exuberance. He fell to her whims most of the time, and the remainder was reserved for when she pushed his buttons a bit too far- which was often.

It was clear that my fellow clansmen had been the stabilizing force of the team. With a mostly absentee sensei who was probably scheming in his various hideouts, Shun had put himself as a pillar of order. It definitely was a Hyūga thing; sticklers to tradition, sharpened by strict orders and honed by high expectations- all weighed down by lineage and kekkei genkai. I wouldn't expect anything less.

I didn't know how to feel about being a replacement, but I managed to get my new teammates into some semblance of order. It would be better for us in the long run, especially since they were still getting used to me and my canine partner, a mutual feeling to be sure. Hopefully it would be something I wouldn't have to deal with for long.

I didn't- couldn't- trust them, that much was certain.

I had no idea how deep Orochimaru had his fangs in them. Sure they acted like normal genin but as shinobi, we were taught to never trust appearances. And it was obvious the pair were a bit starstruck with their assigned teacher. The title of Sanin was an attractive title to ninja both young and old alike, especially genin hoping to climb the ranks. And no matter where you were from, power was connected to who you knew- my new life being a prime example.

For Anko, I could already see her idol worship of him- she wanted to be noticed, wanted his attention very much so as apparent by her interactions with him. I didn't know or remember much her backstory to know where this attention seeking stemmed from but I was sure I could learn it eventually with enough digging.

Shichirou seemed to be in a similar vein if the way he talked about the man was any indication. Considering the boy's name and traditional naming conventions, he must've been the seventh son in a very large family- so it was likely that he was used to being ordered around. Having a powerful mentor was probably his best chance of coming into his own individuality.

Of course, this was all speculation as we didn't spend any time together chatting and sharing stores- couldn't when Shichirou was repeatedly and exasperatedly telling Anko that no, we couldn't deliver the packages via the chimneys as that would obviously damage them- no matter how much faster it would be.

We went our separate ways at the breaking of lunch time with the promise of meeting tomorrow for their regular training regime and it went without saying I wasn't looking forward to it. I had no desire to train with them, especially in that rigged training ground. At least not until I was better prepared for whatever shenanigans had been pulled today.

Plus just because Orochimaru wasn't a hands-on sensei didn't mean he or one of his snakes weren't watching our every move, a thought that spurred me back to the compound a touch faster.

But as Riku and I grew closer and closer to the compound, I felt that apprehension grow even more. It wasn't as if the compound was any better; it was just another place that suffocated me, where I couldn't be myself- though was there really anywhere I could be?

I found myself meandering into the forests; another bad idea but there wasn't anywhere else I felt like going and nowhere I was expected to be. Besides, it was always more comforting to be surrounded by nature. Where I didn't have to perform for anybody and didn't have to answer to anyone. Just the trees and insects and other creatures.

I stepped over roots and fallen branches while Riku scouted ahead, livelier than he had been earlier. He had most likely been feeding off my energy and I couldn't help but feel sorry for the pup, especially since I'd been a complete mess lately. I hadn't been conscious of his well-being, depending on his strength to calm my nerves. I must've been stressing the poor thing out with my constant mood swings.

I had to get it together, not just for my sake.

Before I knew it we had come across a clearing. I stood at the entrance, listening to the waterfalls in the distance. Something was familiar about this place, and it came to mind once I recognized the markings on the tree I had come to stop by. The tree that towered over me had a noticeable dent in the bark, gauged away to reveal the lighter wood underneath which was almost entirely covered in moss.

My eyes widened. This was the tree I had pummeled in my fit when Mother and Father hadn't come back the first time. Where Shisui had seen my outburst, one of the first times my mask had fallen away and I had been exposed. Where we had really established our friendship for the first time, him by saving me from my own out of control feelings and me saving him from Obito's fireball. Where he had followed me because he had been concerned, all in order to give me a sweet bun.

I could never forget something like that.

A giggle slipped out, one that was a mixture of amusement and sadness. To think I had almost died those years ago, upset with the absence of my parents and now I couldn't even look at them without a tinge of resentment. How things had changed…

I walked deeper into the clearing as Riku bounded in front of me from his frolic through the trees. Seeing the huge hound so carefree soothed the remaining tension I felt and for the first time in a while I felt at ease. It was a very large clearing, enough for training sessions without issue and yet seeming untouched by anyone. The ground was mostly level, the lush grass fading to dirt as it reached the cliff side which overlooked the river below.

A perfect little getaway.

As Riku scouted the area, I stepped closer to the cliff's edge being especially careful. Though on the off chance I did fall, again, I would have a better chance surviving the fall this time, even without the assist. But standing on the edge, watching the flowing water and its crashing in the river below, I couldn't help but feel small. Well, smaller than a six year old could be.

It made my problems seems so insignificant in the large scheme of things. All I had really done was get caught up in other people's webs, sometimes readily throwing myself into them, star struck at the chance to save what used to be fictional characters. And somehow that had landed me with one of the craziest people in the village as my teacher- who was probably thinking about how to kidnap me and dissect me right now.

Being the Hyūga heiress didn't seem all that bad in comparison.

I rubbed my eyes with a sigh.

"What am I going to do?"

I sat on the cliff side for a while, bathing in the quiet of the forest before I went back to deal with what awaited me at home. In the silence, there was only the wind through the trees and the crashing of the waterfall and it helped my mood. In an ideal world, I could have stayed there forever under the spring sky with my canine companion at my back, but I couldn't escape reality forever.

Regrettably.

I lifted myself from my comfortable position against Riku and stretched towards the seemingly endless sky, hoping that it would take me away before dusting myself off. The transition from afternoon to evening had quieted the forest behind us as the day creatures began to settle down for the night and I would have to follow suit before the more nocturnal beings came out to play. Not that I was particularly scared of anything that could be hidden within, but I had played with luck enough for one day.

Riku shook the dirt from his fur as he trailed behind me but we didn't get far before we both sensed something coming toward us from the trees. That familiar something, or someone, appeared at the edge of the clearing we were facing and in the dying light, I met with obsidian eyes made darker in the shade of the trees which were wide in surprise.

Shisui?

Riku barked and pounced forward cheerfully to greet our friend but I lagged behind nothing the oddness in his expression. Even in the dimming light, I could see that the smile that lifted his lips didn't reach his eyes when the canine almost bowled him over. Riku could sense it too as he doubled his affection with wet nose kiss and licks, eventually overtaking the boy who fell with a startled laugh.

I took my time walking over to the duo, carefully observing the Uchiha while Riku stretched his heavy body across the boy's sprawled legs and rolled onto his back expectantly. The darkness that I had seen in his expression had lightened briefly from the act. But only briefly. We made eye contact as I came to crouch beside him and he pushed himself into a sitting position.

I went to speak but Riku let a grumpy noise when his act for attention was ignored and the both of us chuckled lightly as Shisui finally fulfilled the canine's wish. Another stretch of silence overcame us, only disturbed by Riku's excited panting. The darkness returned to his eyes as he looked down at the affectionate dog, scratching underneath his chin and the sand-colored patch of fur on his chest.

I looked up at the sky which had taken a more purple hue from its previous sunset before finally speaking.

"Do you want to come over for dinner?"

…

Shisui remained silent all the way to the compound, sitting behind me while we rode atop Riku's back. Despite all my mind churning, I couldn't figure out what could have happened to my normally happy friend. There was a heaviness in his gaze that didn't belong in his usually strong and confident face and I continued to think about ways to help him as we walked past the guarded entrance of the compound, easily ignoring the looks and sneers as we made our way towards home.

We slid from our canine transport and gave him a few affectionate pats in thanks before heading inside. The house was quiet and dark, the light from outside not enough, signaling that my parents had not returned from their respective duties. I was quick to turn on the lights as we made our way into the kitchen. A note was placed on the counter by the stove and my face fell as I read its contents.

'Sorry for the late notice but your father will be late and I will be out of the village for the rest of the night; I've left dinner in the fridge for you. Get some rest and we'll see you in the morning. Love kaa-chan and tou-chan!'

I sighed as Shisui read from over my shoulder. A tension filled morning and then they couldn't even be bothered to be here when I got home? Even with mother's antics and worry about my new sensei, they didn't care enough to make sure I even came home? What's even going on?

"I guess it'll just be the three of us tonight." I shrugged, trying to shake the negative feelings from my mind. This wasn't about me right now. I could mope later.

I shifted my focus to Shisui who gave a sympathetic smile in return.

"You mind feeding Riku? I'll warm up the food."

"Sure," he replied. There was a heaviness in his voice too, but I wasn't going to speak on it until we had both gotten food into our systems.

Food made everything better, even if it was only a little bit. Miho-san had taught me that.

It didn't take long for us to complete our tasks, and since there were no adults in the vicinity, I made the decision to eat out on the backyard deck. Shisui had looked at me questioningly but shrugged and followed. The night that had fallen during our journey home held onto the warmth of the afternoon and as we settled onto the cushions I had laid out, the silence returned, albeit a lighter one.

We ate in the quiet with the light from the kitchen and the porch lamps behind us; only the sound of insects accompanied us, repelled by a few seals carved into the wood of the deck. I finished my dinner a bit faster than the Uchiha since I had missed lunch and set my bowl aside, turning my eyes to the sky. A warmth spread from my full belly and into my tired limbs. Stars were starting to peak from the darkness above as the sun finally disappeared beneath the horizon.

If there was something I didn't miss from my previous life, it was the light pollution which hid sights like these. Just like the waterfall and the cliff side, the stars made me feel small but in a comforting way. Sure I may be small and the things I was doing might be insignificant but there was a whole world out there, one full of mysterious things both good and bad.

The stars twinkled down at us, watching the coming and going of humanity. Our successes and failures. A reminder that the world was huge and many people could be watching the same sky. That I wasn't completely alone, despite how small I was.

I glanced at the Uchiha who had also finished his meal and was watching the stars emerge from the growing night sky. Feeling my eyes on him, his own drifted towards me and I gave him a smile.

"Good evening Shisui," I said and he chuckled. A good start.

"Good evening Junko" he said, a little smile of his own lifting his lips.

Before I could start my interrogation, seeing his better mood, the sliding door opened behind us as Riku pushed it aside with his head, a blanket held in his maw. We gave the canine pats of thanks as he stretched out behind us and we settled against his side, pulling the blanket over our legs.

I didn't speak, waiting for the Uchiha to open up and it didn't take long.

"My dad finally returned from the front lines," he started and I felt a pit form in my stomach. "He…he's in really bad shape."

Another silence spread between us as I processed what he'd said.

"Oh Shisui…" He shook his head.

"The doctors are still working on him; they wouldn't let us see him but mom is waiting at the hospital. I just couldn't…"

"You felt helpless," I concluded, and he nodded. I knew how he felt, a similar thing having happened to my own.

"I know that there isn't much I can do but it sucks to be so powerless," he sighed, allowing himself to be partially hidden by Riku's fur as he sunk into the canine's warmth.

I nodded in agreement, letting my eyes drift to the skies once more. When Father was in the hospital, Mother's reassurances had helped immensely. And seeing him injured, eye missing, had paled in comparison to being under his strong living gaze. Father had been awake when I had seen him and he had listened to me go on and on about everything he had missed. That day when my parents had returned from the war, emotionally charged and tear-filled; the helplessness hadn't had the chance to sink in, blindsided by all the relief I had felt just being able to see them.

I was one of the lucky ones.

Shisui probably hadn't seen his father since the first deployment and to have him come home in such a state, still unable to lay his eyes on one of the people he had been missing for years…

"I even overheard the nurses say that he couldn't continue being a ninja, if he ever woke up," he continued, and I turned back to him, his dark eyes even darker.

Riku whined and shifted to lay his head on the Uchiha's lap, curling around us tighter and causing our shoulders to bump. A sad smile crossed his face and he played with the canine's large ears as he continued.

"I know as ninja we're supposed to understand and accept the consequences of the shinobi way, and I do," he continued. "It's just…hard."

I nodded. Shisui lifted his eyes to mine and I could see the pain within them.

"I just wish there was something I could do."

Another silence stretched between us as he continued to cuddle Riku and words formed on my tongue before I could think about them.

"I don't know if it amounts to much, but I think your father would just be happy to know that you've became a strong ninja at such a young age," I began and I felt a bit of embarrassment spark within me as he lifted his eyes to mine, his focus intense, taking every word.

I lifted my eyes to the stars once more but continued to speak.

"Our circumstances for joining the academy may be different but clans like ours don't take the ninja lifestyle lightly, ya know?"

I glanced over to see his nod then turned my eyes back to the stars, relaxing somewhat.

"I think, more than anything, that our parents didn't want us to go through the things they did, and that's why they fought so hard in the war; maybe even more than the love of the village."

I leaned back to sink into the warmth of Riku' body, the turmoil of the day finally catching up with me.

"Not saying that they don't love the village of course, but when I was almost killed on my first mission, I wasn't thinking about failing the village or Sandaime or my clan. I thought about how I'd never see my parents again. And on that mission where I killed that man-" Ichirou, my mind supplied unhelpfully. "I didn't think about the repercussions of his survival as failing the mission and thus the village. His survival had meant Noburu's death and I just couldn't let that happen. Even if I had gotten hurt in doing so."

I blinked warily rubbing my eyes and brought the blanket closer to my chin.

"It's not a weakness to worry about those you love and care about," I said and as Riku shifted again, my body slid into Shisui again but I didn't bother moving. "It could even be a strength. Maybe it's why, despite how injured your father is right now, he's still alive and fighting. He didn't just submit to death out on the field. I'm sure he'll recover just so he can see you and your mother again."

The crickets had begun their song as the night grew stronger, its power seeming to increase the gravity on my eyelids, and I let them close briefly.

"I know how it feels to be helpless; I feel it more often than not actually," I mumbled. "I know my birth caused a lot of problems between my parents and the clan and I hate that I can't do anything to resolve it. And even so they love me, and do their best for me, even when I'm a brat."

I forced my eyes back open, blinking up at the boy who had an unreadable expression on his face. Focus Junko.

"I guess what I'm trying to say is that parents want the best for their children, or at the very least they should. I doubt they want us to do anything but grow up and live our lives to the fullest, ninja shenanigans aside."

I let my eyes close fully, letting my head knock lightly against his shoulder as sleep began to pull me under.

"I think the most you can do in a situation like this is to show him that all the love and fighting wasn't for nothing, in any way you know how. Even if it's just waiting at his side. As talented as we are, we're only kids, ya know…"

My words trailed off into a yawn as the outside world began to fade.

"Sorry for rambling so much…" I mumbled as sleep finally took over.

Omake: On a Night Like This

Shisui continued to process Hyūga's words even as the younger girl yielded to sleep. He felt a bit guilty; he had noticed the tiredness of his friend as she had probably come from her own training or mission earlier today and yet she had spent the evening helping him with his problem. Not that he had expected her to be there on that cliff side, which had brought them together the first time.

Ever since they had met at the academy, Junko had always been there for him. When the world was confusing, she found ways to explain it or at least make it a bit more bearable even when she didn't have all the answers. It was reassuring.

The weight of his father's condition was lightened, if only a little, and it took a backseat as he looked down at his friend. Even though she had comforted him, her words had also worried him, as she often tended to do. He didn't know the pressure of being the heir to a powerful clan, but as she had eluded to in her sleepy rambling, it was obvious the younger girl was under a lot of stress- though when wasn't she?

In that way, he also felt powerless. Was there anything he could do for his friend?

The young Uchiha's own brooding thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the sliding door behind them opening wider. He and Riku turned to see Daichi step onto the deck, looking over them with an indiscernible expression, dressed in his jonin gear.

"Uh, hello Daichi-san," he said quietly as to not disturb his sleeping friend.

The Hyūga's remaining eye drifted from him to his daughter and his lip twitched slightly in what Shisui thought was amusement before it disappeared.

"Hello Shisui-san," he replied just as quietly.

He walked around them with soundless steps, giving the canine an affectionate scratch as he bent down and effortlessly scoped Junko in his arms. The little heiress only mumbled something in her sleep before adjusting in his arms. She must've been exhausted if she didn't even react to being picked up. Shisui felt a tinge of longing at the act but mentally shook himself and rose to his feet, folding the discarded blanket over his arm as Daichi turned to him.

"I'll put Junko to bed then walk you home, okay Shisui-san?"

The Uchiha nodded not trusting his voice.

True to his word, the elder was quick to tuck his daughter into bed and giving a whiny Riku some farewell pats, they headed out of the Hyūga compound, thankfully without trouble. As they walked through the almost empty streets of Konoha, Shisui's mind went back to his father and the words Junko had given him. Guilt began to spring up in him; he had just let his mother wait all by herself in the hospital.

"Daichi-san, could you take me to Konoha General?" Shisui asked, breaking the silence, and the older man looked down at him. "I have to go see my dad."

A look of understanding shone in his lone eye.

"Of course."

Author's Notes

Posted: June 8th, 2020

Well, the world's going to shit but have an update. I hope everyone is holding up well.

Someone asked me about an Ao3 (Archive of Our Own) account and I do have one under 'eiron' there as well, just haven't posted anything on it yet since I'm still learning the site. If people are interested, I'm willing to cross-post For A Chance at Happiness there as well, though it will be a slower process to catch up to the current chapter since I don't believe I can just export directly from here. It'll give me a chance to do a little more editing/updating to the earlier chapters as well.

That's all for now; please stay safe and treat others kindly in these times.