It was certainly going to be a night to remember, Zay thought to himself. His 22nd birthday was only a handful of weeks before his last set of undergraduate final exams, so he was ready to bar crawl through the weekend until he couldn't feel his legs any longer. And maybe by the end of Sunday night, he'd have a girl in his bed to look up at him with wide, brown eyes full of love.

"Hey, Mary," he said, turning to the girl seated on his right in his Advanced Auditing lecture, "I was wondering if you had plans this weekend? I'm starting a bar crawl tonight that ends on my birthday on Sunday."

Mary Wen was gorgeous: she had jet black hair and wore large wire frame glasses to emphasize how bright and happy her hazel-brown eyes were. He thought she wore them just to tease him. She squinted at him and said, "The whole weekend? Really, Zay? Isn't that a bit much?"

"Oh, I, uh, you don't have to come for the whole thing…" he backtracked, stuttering his way through all the hasty corrections he could make.

"I'm kidding. I'd love to join you. And see the true wild Zay I've heard so much about this semester." She flipped her hair over her shoulder, exposing a strip of caramel-tanned skin on her neck and he practically whimpered. "I'll text you around 9?"

"Great, great," he sputtered as she got up and left class. Tonight was going to be the shit.

From: Zay-bae
To: Lukey-boy, Farkly
3:21 P.M.
Tonight is going to be the shit!1!

From: Lukey-boy
To: Zay-bae, F. Minkus
3:22 P.M.
Why?

From: Zay-bae
To: Lukey-boy, Farkly
3:22 P.M.
Mary said yes! She's coming tonight

From: Farkly
To: Isaiah, Lucas
3:23 P.M.
hell yeah she is

From: Farkly
To: Isaiah, Lucas
3:23 P.M.
did I do it right?

From: Lukey-boy
To: Zay-bae, F. Minkus
3:25 P.M.
LOL Yeah man, exactly right.

At 9:30, the guys arrived at their first bar of the evening — a sports bar so that they could catch the last quarter of the Wizards and Celtics game. Mary still hadn't texted him and he was shaking with nervous worry.

After taking two shots, he asked his most wise counsel, "Should I text her now?"

Farkle and Lucas shared a look. They'd already denied him of making the first move about 14 times earlier, before they decided to start the crawl an hour early to calm him with his two favorite things: tequila and basketball. Lucas was also worried that this Mary, who he'd only met once or twice since Zay started talking exclusively about her, was about to break his boy's heart during his birthday weekend.

"Yeah, man, but only one text, so think carefully," he allowed, scrolling through his best friend's contacts to find Mary's number. Mary Wen. Zay had it bad, Lucas thought has he handed him his phone.

From: Zay Babe-ineaux
To: Mary Wen
9:32 P.M.
Id like to know where dora
the explorers parents are when she goes
on all these crazy ass adventures

"That's what you carefully chose to say?" Farkle exclaimed after Zay showed them his message.

Zay shrugged. "I didn't want to seem needy."

"She just responded."

From: Mary Wen
To: Zay Babe-ineaux
9:35 P.M.
Probably stoned out of their mind tbh

That got a hard snort from Lucas.

From: Mary Wen
To: Zay Babe-ineaux
9:35 P.M.
What bar are y'all at?

From: Zay Babe-ineaux
To: Mary Wen
9:36 P.M.
Porter's

From: Mary Wen
To: Zay Babe-ineaux
9:37 P.M.
:)

An hour later, Zay was pretty buzzed. He was at the peak of his prime. The girls and Josh had arrived just after the game ended and wanted to head over to the next bar as quickly as possible. But Zay pouted and forced them to wait because he knew Mary was on her way.

"Is he sure she's not standing him up?" Riley murmured, hoping only Lucas would hear. Zay had been worried that inviting the girls out too would mean he was seventh wheeling, but his friends kindly didn't wander off to do the dirty deed or suck face or anything else, really wanting to celebrate wit him.

"He's positive."

Suddenly, a pair of soft hands wrapped around his head, covering his eyes, and a teasing voice came out from the darkness, ringing clear in his ears despite the muffled sound of music and conversation. "Guess who?"

"You came," he said excitedly, a wide grin plastered on his mouth. She uncovered his eyes and gave him a tight hug, complete with a kiss on the cheek.

"Happy early birthday!" Mary then turned to the bartender and ordered a round of tequila shots, before looking back at the rest of the group. "Tequila shots okay?"

"I like you," Maya exclaimed. "Nice to meet you, they call me Maya and this is my boyfriend Josh."

"Wow," she said breathlessly. "You guys are one fucking gorgeous couple. Well done, I applaud you both."

The round of tequila shots came and went, the slick burn in Zay's throat coming from his nerves more so than the alcohol. Farkle extended his hand and said, "I'm Farkle and this is Isadora Smackle-"

"But you may call me Smackle. I am so glad Zay has found you, I think you will fit in pleasantly with the rest of us."

Mary blushed. "You talk about me?"

"All the time," Lucas blurted out as he pulled the girl into a hug. "Nice to see you again. This is Riley, my new girlfriend."

"Wonderful to meet you."

"You too. Zay has told me a lot about y'all too. This is the Riley you took forever to get with?"

It was Riley's turn to blush. "We've all probably have taken our sweet time getting our current boyfriends in bed actually."

"Although Smackle and Farkle are already engaged," chirped Josh. "If you don't mind me asking, what's your ethnic background?"

"No, it's totally fine," she chuckled. "My dad is from Hong Kong and my mom is Irish and Portuguese, born in Ireland. And I was born in lil ole America."

"Cantonese is spoken in Hong Kong right?" Zay asked.

"Primarily, yeah. I know enough to hold a conversation but my Portuguese is less impressive." Mary confidently wrapped her arm around Zay's waist and flirtatiously smiled. "But enough about me, this is about the birthday boy! Let's get wasted!"

"Hell yeah!"

They were on the dance floor at a new club, happy and sweaty and drunk. It was perfect. She was perfect. All his friends had disappeared throughout the night to rest and hydrate but her stamina was just as enduring as Zay's. Mary could definitely keep up.

"I'm so glad you asked me tonight," she shouted, wrapping her arms around his neck and cupping him gently. Her breath smelled sweet, despite the dozens of shots she'd thrown down.

"I'm glad you came."

"I wanna do more than just come," she winked. Oh boy, here we go.

From: Lukey-boy
To: Zay-bae
9:59 A.M.
why are there post-it notes
all around the apartment labeled where
you guys had sex and in what position

From: Lukey-boy
To: Zay-bae
9:59 A.M.
also how did you already fuck her

From: Zay-bae
To: Lukey-boy
10:01 A.M.
I am just that good

From: Zay-bae
To: Lukey-boy
10:01 A.M.
she and I had the most amazing sex
and then she rolled over and said
"lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen...

From: Zay-bae
To: Lukey-boy
10:01 A.M.
naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow