Author's Note: Hello! So this is, hopefully, going to be my first chaptered fanfic! I'm super excited about this! I have been developing this story/character for over a year now and I'm so glad that I can finally publish this (even if it only is one chapter right now)! Anyway, updates will be slow, sadly, as I am not someone who can write chapters super quickly. This chapter takes place during the pilot, but the next chapter will be season 3 ( + flashbacks). Honestly the only reason i'm doing it this way is that I wrote this whole chapter out before I decided to start in season 3 and I wasn't about to not use this lmao. Anyway, this is also 100% unbeta'd so I hope it's okay in that aspect! I hope you all enjoy Lily's story!

PROLOGUE

A blur of reds, oranges, and yellows was all that could be seen through the dirt-specked back windows of the '67 Impala. Autumn had officially arrived a few weeks before, causing the change in leaf colors and the drop in temperature. The air outside was nearly always crisp and cold, and Lily couldn't help but enjoy it. She loved wearing jeans and her hoodies and over sized jackets that she had stolen from her older brothers. Wearing her typical outfit during the summer months was brutal, especially in the south, and in her opinion her life was already hard enough without the added discomfort.

Lily and her family were hunters of the supernatural: ghosts, werewolves, demons, etc. Practically every 'legend' out there was true in one way or another, and they hunted them. This definitely wasn't the easiest life, nor the safest. Lily couldn't count the amount of times her dad or one of her three older brothers had come back from a hunt all bruised up and bleeding. That was just a part of hunting, a part of their life. She herself had even been hurt. On her first ever hunt the month before she had broken two of her ribs because she hadn't followed her father's orders to a T. She had been slacking, not paying enough attention, and the ghost they had been hunting had caught her off guard, throwing her into one of the nearby graves and busting up her ribs.

Despite her dislike for the job, she knew she couldn't leave. One of her older brothers, Sam, had left them when Lily was seven for college and she could see how his departure had affected their family; It had broken them. How could she leave after seeing what Sam's disappearance had done to them? So, no matter how much she wanted out, she couldn't leave them.

Maybe his departure wouldn't have hurt them all so much if Sam hadn't completely cut them off from his life. No phone calls, no text messages, nothing. It had been complete radio silence from him for the past four years. And it wasn't like Lily or her older brother Adam hadn't tried; for the first few months after Sam had left all the duo did was call him. But he never answered them and they soon gave up trying, growing to resent him for abandoning them.

And now their dad was missing.

And their eldest brother, Dean, was forcing them to get Sam's help.

And all Lily wanted was to forget all about the brother that had left them.

If their father wasn't missing, Lily would've never agreed to go to Stanford to see Sam; she would've had to have been literally dragged into the car by Dean. She resented Sam, even though he just wanted a normal life. He could've called her back. He could've been there for her.

"How long until we stop for food?" Lily asked, whining slightly from her seat in the back of the car. Her favorite (and only) pillow was tucked underneath her head, and she had kicked her battered-up converse sneakers to the floor. Laying across her stomach was her favorite book, Charlotte's Web. Her copy was torn and falling apart; a result of being read all the time and being from Goodwill. Their father rarely ever bought anything new, and most of the new things were given to Dean, as he was the eldest, or Lily, as she was the only girl. Adam and Sam had always been given the short end of the stick; neither of them had ever gotten anything new growing up.

"We'll stop at a diner around five, Lils," Dean replied, before turning the volume knob on the radio and blasting 'Renegade' by Styx. He began tapping his hands on the steering wheel to the beat of the song.

Lily groaned, sitting up and pouting. "That's two more hours!" She complained. Dean pretended that he couldn't hear her over the music, while their brother Adam had his music blasting through his headphones from his mp3 player. She could hear the beat of 'Highway to Hell' by ACDC even from her seat in the back of the car.

Lily was definitely closest to Adam, out of all three of her brothers. It may have had something to do with the small age distance of only three years, or it could just be because they understood each other perfectly. They both had gone through somewhat similar experiences and were both somewhat outsiders even in their own family. Either way, Adam and Lily were each other's best friend and they were pretty close for siblings. Considering the fact that neither Lily nor Adam could have actual friends due to their nomadic lifestyle, they were each other's only friends, really.

It wasn't like they weren't friends with Dean, or that they loved him any less than they did each other, it was just that Dean was pretty much their father at this point. Dean had raised Sam, Adam, and Lily while their father had been off hunting and searching for revenge for his wife's murder. Their father was more of a trainer or drill sergeant than a father; he taught them to shoot a gun and to fight and to throw knives and to make their own bullets and to salt and burn graves. Dean was the one who taught them how to tie their shoes and helped them learn to read and made them dinner and helped them with their homework and healed their injuries and went to their parent-teacher conferences.

Lily, being twelve, took Dean for granted.

Two hours later the 1967 Impala was pulling into the parking lot of some cheap diner. All three of them grabbed their weapons: Dean and Adam with their favorite handguns while Lily took the knife Dean had gotten her for her twelfth birthday. They entered the diner, after hiding their weapons in the insides of their jackets, and took a booth in a secluded corner, just like they always did.

"Do we really have to go get Sam?" Lily asked, a whine seeping into her tone, again. "I mean, we haven't even heard from him, let alone seen him, in the past four years. Can't we find Dad without him?"

"She's right, Dean, we don't need Sam to find Dad," Adam added, looking up from the diner's menu. "For all we know, he could be a really rusty hunter by now."

"Yeah," She agreed with her brother. "Plus, Adam and I are both totally capable of hunting, and we could totally find Dad without Sam. Let's just screw this and go trace Dad's last steps or somethin'."

"Look, I know you guys are mad at Sam or whatever, but he's family," Dean spoke, there was a certain sadness in his voice at this.

"Bullshit, Dean," Adam spat. "Sam doesn't care about us, anymore. If he did he wouldn't have ignored mine and Lils' calls and messages. We don't need him."

Dean glared at his youngest brother, his eyebrows furrowed in anger. "We're going to Stanford tomorrow, finding Sam, and then we're gonna find Dad - all four of us - together."

Lily couldn't help but roll her eyes at Dean's verdict, but neither she nor Adam said anything. She flipped through the diner's menu only to figure out if they had her usual - chicken fingers and a chocolate milkshake. From her nine years of crappy diner experiences, she found that chicken fingers were always the safest option.

"Could I take your orders or do you need a couple more minutes?" A blonde waitress asked, smiling at the trio. Lily couldn't help but think that this girl was quite pretty. Her long, blonde hair fell in waves down her back, and her hazel eyes were incredibly bright. She had never really seen eyes like those before. Dean's were pretty close, but they weren't as bright as this girl's were.

"Lils." Dean's gruff voice startled her from her thoughts, and she noticed that not only were Adam and Dean staring at her, but so was the waitress, waiting for Lily's order.

She could feel the sudden heat in her cheeks as she realized what had happened. Had she really been staring at the woman the whole time? Shaking her head, she glanced back down at the menu, again, before placing her order. "Chicken fingers and a chocolate milkshake, please," She mumbled, but the waitress seemed to understand, as she scrawled something down on her notepad, threw all three of them a soft smile, then walked off.

"Lils, are you feeling alright?" Adam asked her, his tone somewhat playful.

She chuckled. "Yeah, I'm fine, I must've just zoned out or somethin'."

Once the trio of siblings were done with their meal they were back in the Impala, on their way to see their brother for the first time in years. It wasn't until hours later, long after it had gone dark, that they reached Stanford. The Impala rumbled into the parking lot of Sam's apartment building, the car unusually silent as Dean had turned off his music. Adam and Lily had both fallen asleep, Lily sprawled out across the back seat while Adam had curled up in the passenger seat.

"Lils, Ads, wake up," Dean mumbled, shaking Lily and Adam's shoulders. After a few minutes the three siblings were out of the car and walking to find the correct apartment. Lily and Adam looked as if they were half dead. Lily's long, brown hair was frizzy and tangled from sleep, while Adam's short, blonde quiff was flattened against his forehead. In short, they both looked absolutely ridiculous. Dean would've laughed at them if he wasn't so focused on Sam.

"This is it," Dean whispered, reaching the correct door. "Lils, do your thing."

All four of the Winchester siblings could pick locks easily, but it was Lily's specialty and she liked to do it any chance she got. Lily nodded, pulled her lock-picking kit out from her jacket pocket and crouched down in front of the lock. About thirty seconds later they were in, and they all moved stealthily through the apartment. Adam and Lily followed Dean, as neither of them knew where they were going, though they were pretty sure their older brother didn't really know either.

"Why didn't we just knock?" Lily questioned, her voice only a whisper. As it was currently two o'clock in the morning, they were all trying their best to be quiet. But, they clearly weren't quiet enough.

Seemingly out of nowhere, Dean was punched in the face. Dean quickly retaliated and began to fight whoever the person was. Lily and Adam quickly moved out of the way, both of them assuming who the other person was. Despite the darkness of the room, none of the punches thrown missed their target. Dean soon gained the upper hand and pinned Sam to the ground . . . at least they were guessing it was Sam.

"Woah, easy, tiger," Dean spoke. A grin reached its way onto his face.

"Dean?" Sam asked, confused.

Dean just laughed at his little brother's expense.

"You scared the crap out of me!" Sam exclaimed, not necessarily angry.

"That's 'cause you're outta practice." Dean smirked.

Sam caught Dean off guard and pinned Dean to the floor.

"Or not. Now get off me."

Sam easily got to his feet and helped his older brother up. He didn't notice Adam or Lily standing off to the side, which was just fine to both of them. They had twin scowls on their faces, neither one thrilled to see Sam again.

"What are you doing here?" Sam asked Dean, confused still.

"Well, I was looking for a beer." Dean smirked.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Sam asked again, wanting a serious answer.

"Alright, we need to talk," Dean replied, his tone grieve and serious.

"Uh - the phone?"

Adam barked out a laugh, though there was no humor behind it. Sam, not knowing anyone else was in the room, jumped and whipped around to face his younger siblings for the first time in four years.

"As if you ever pick up the phone when we call," Adam snapped. His arms were crossed over his chest, his jaw was set, and his light eyes glared daggers into Sam's similar ones.

"Adam, Lily, I -" Sam began, but Adam cut him off.

"Oh, so you do remember our names?" He snapped, again, his tone very sarcastic and bitter. Adam knew he was probably being a bit too harsh, but it had been four years of radio silence from him. He had been gone so long that Adam barely had any good memories of him left, as he had only been eleven at the time.

"Ads," Sam tried again.

"No," Adam cut him off once more. "I don't want to hear whatever fucking pathetic excuse you have. I could deal with the fact that you went to college, but Jesus Christ, Sam, you acted like we didn't exist! A phone call once in awhile would've been nice!" His voice cracked. "You never picked up the phone!"

Everyone was eerily silent after Adam ended his rant. By the end of it his voice had gone from quiet to extremely loud - practically screaming. It was only two in the morning, and no one would have been surprised if Sam's neighbors came knocking.

Lily put her arm on her brother's and gave him a soft smile. She agreed with everything he'd said, and she knew that Sam deserved all of it, but she couldn't help but feel like he could have said it nicer. Though Lily wasn't the nicest person on the planet or anything, she was extremely empathetic and wasn't a big fan of conflict between her family members. A part of her did wish she could just forgive Sam, but she knew he didn't deserve to be forgiven just yet. Her heart was being pulled in two different directions - one was forgiving Sam and the other was making him feel as isolated and upset as he had made them feel. Adam clearly had no problem with calling Sam out for what he did.

"Sam?" The tension dissipated from the air as an extremely tall woman walked into the room. She had long, curly blonde hair and was dressed in short-shorts and a cut-off Smurf's t-shirt. She was about the same height as Dean, and her legs were probably around the same length as his as well. How anyone could shave legs as long as hers Lily didn't know.

"Jess. Hey. Dean, Adam, Lily this is my girlfriend Jessica," Sam introduced, not meeting Adam's eyes as he addressed his siblings.

"Your brothers and sister?" Jess inquired, smiling.

Sam nodded, while Dean smirked at Jess and moved closer to her. "You know, I gotta tell you; you are completely outta my brothers' league."

Lily rolled her eyes, though a smirk tugged at her lips. "Try to keep it in your pants, would'ya, Dean-o?"

Dean tossed his sister a glare. "What did I tell you about calling me Dean-o?" He grumbled, but he wasn't truly angry, just a bit annoyed.

"Just let me put something on," Jess said, glancing at Sam before moving to head back to her bedroom.

"No, no, no, I wouldn't dream of it." Dean stopped her. "Seriously."

Lily crinkled her nose in disgust. "Dean-o." She smirked. "Please do everyone a favor and stop being creepy."

Dean threw her another glare at the nickname, but chose to ignore it this time. "Well, listen, I've got to borrow your boyfriend here and talk about some private family business," He said to Jess, walking back to where Sam, Adam, and Lily stood. "But, uh, nice meetin' you."

Jess smiled at him, clearly trying to be friendly, but it looked somewhat forced.

"No," Sam said, standing next to Jess and sliding his arm around her waist. "No, whatever you wanna say you guys can say it in front of her."

Lily rolled her eyes, annoyed at how they wouldn't be able to just come out and say it with Jess here. Though Lily was extremely happy that Sam had found such a seemingly great girl at such a prestigious school, she was sad that he was so happy without her, Dean, and Adam. She knew it was selfish of her, but she was jealous. Jealous that Sam was so happy, jealous that he got to be with a girl he clearly loved, and jealous that he had gotten out of the hunting business. Though she never voiced this dream aloud, not even to Adam, Lily wanted to leave, too. She wanted to go to college once she graduated High School; it had been a dream of hers ever since Sam had begun to talk about it all those years ago.

She knew her dream may have had something to do with the fact that she used to practically worship Sam when they were younger, but Lily had also yearned for a somewhat normal life like she used to have. Well, a normal life like she assumed she had had. Lily had lived with her mother for the first three years of her life, none of which she really remembered. Then, a month after her third birthday, her mother was killed. The image of her mother's death still plagued Lily's mind to this day. She still, even about nine years later, found herself waking up in the middle of the night, screaming and crying with beads of sweat collecting at her forehead. Her mother's death was the first memory that Lily had, making it her only memory of her mother. She knew next to nothing about her mother. All she knew was that she had brown hair, brown eyes, and that her first language was Spanish. John would never talk about her, ashamed that he had another child, let alone two other children, without his wife.

Dean sighed, sending Lily and Adam a look before turning back to Sam. "Okay, um, Dad hasn't been home in a few days," He spoke, trying to stay as vague as possible, assuming that Jess had no clue about what the Winchester's did for a living.

"So, he's working overtime on a Miller Time shift. He'll stumble back in sooner or later," Sam replied.

Lily rolled her eyes at her brother. He wasn't understanding. "Sam, Dad's on a hunting trip, and he hasn't been home in a few days," Lily clarified, wanting to get this show on the road. She and Sam stared each other down for a moment, Sam's facial expression not changing as he took the information in.

"Jess," He said, still staring into Lily's dark eyes. "Excuse us."

Dean, Sam, Adam, and Lily all climbed down the stairs of Sam's apartment building, arguing with one another. Well, it was mostly Sam arguing with his three siblings more than anything else.

"Come on," Sam complained. "You three can't just break into my apartment in the middle of the night and expect me to hit the road with you."

"Hey, it was Dean's idea!" Lily exclaimed, tossing a glare back at Sam over her shoulder. She turned back forward to watch her steps. "Besides, Adam and I were against even coming here to ask. And then I was the one who suggested we knocked instead of picking the lock, even if it is my favorite thing to do."

"Well, thanks for throwing me under the bus, Lils," Dean drawled, though his tone was sarcastic.

"No problem, Dean-o." She threw Dean a smirk.

Sam furrowed his eyebrows, though Lily wasn't looking back at him to notice. "Your favorite thing to do is pick locks?"

Lily tossed him another glare as they walked up the steps outside. "My favorite part of hunting, you idiot."

"So, Sammy," Dean interrupted, while the group halted. Lily tossed him a glare for interrupting them, even if all they were doing was arguing. "Dad's missing. We need your help to find him."

"Remember the poltergeist in Amherst?" Sam questioned. "Or the Devil's Gates in Clifton?" Lily's eyebrows furrowed; she didn't remember either of those. "He was missing then, too, he's always missing, and he's always fine," He practically spat. It was obvious to everyone there that Sam was still angry with their father, and Lily honestly couldn't blame him. She would still be mad, too, if their father had said those terrible things to her. Though, she had a feeling she would be more upset than angry; their father could be an asshole.

Adam narrowed his eyes, his jaw set. "You don't know that he'll be okay. This could end up being the time that he doesn't come back."

"He has a track record of leaving for weeks or, Hell, sometimes even months, but he's always come back," Sam explained, still sounding a bit bitter. "What makes this time so different?'

"He hasn't called in weeks, sound like someone else you know?" Adam said, giving his brother an icy glare. In that moment, Lily could clearly see the resemblance between her two brothers, even if they were only half-brothers. For one thing, both of them had blue eyes. Adam's were more icy and cold, while Sam's were deeper and darker, but they both had blue eyes, none the less. They both had their jaws set, anger pulsing through them. And, although Adam was only at a height of 5'7" (he would grow more, Lily was sure of it), he always held himself at his full height, towering over people (well, over her), just like Sam did.

"Alright, you two, stop it," Dean intervened, breaking up a family fight just like he always did. "Sam, are you gonna come with us or no?"

"I'm not."

"Why not?"

"I swore I was done hunting," Sam spoke, his face softening. "For good."

"Come on, it wasn't easy but it wasn't that bad." Dean rolled his eyes.

"Yeah?" Sam scoffed. "When I told Dad that I was scared of the thing in my closet he gave me a .45."

"Well, what was he supposed to do?" Dean asked, always the one to defend their father no matter what.

"I was nine years old!" Sam scoffed, clearly not believing what he was hearing. "He was supposed to say 'don't be afraid of the dark'."

"'Don't be afraid of the dark', what, are you kidding me?" Dean exclaimed, taking his turn to glare at Sam. "Of course you should be afraid of the dark, you know what's out there!"

"That's comforting," Lily mumbled to herself, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Yeah, I know, but the way we grew up after Mom was killed," Sam continued. "And Dad's obsession to find the thing that killed her, but we still haven't found the damned thing."

Lily suddenly felt out of place, and, by the way Adam tensed up beside her, he did too. Sam and Dean both had a special connection with one another because they were full siblings. They had the same mother and the same father and had been with one another their whole lives. Lily and Adam, on the other hand, were their half-siblings. They didn't have the same experiences as Sam and Dean did and it made the two feel like outsiders in their own family. It was a frequent conversation the two had had when they were younger.

"And so we kill everything we can find," Sam finished.

"And save a lot of people doing it, too," Dean added, still glaring at his brother, though there was no true anger behind it.

They stared each other down for a moment, the tension in the crisp October air was thick, and Lily just wanted to get out of there.

"You think Mom would've wanted this for us?"

Dean didn't respond. He quickly turned and walked off. They all knew that talk about their mothers was a touchy subject, and yet Sam did it anyway.

"Sam," Adam spat as they followed after Dean. "How would you know what your mom would've wanted for the two of you? She died when you were fucking six months old!" That made Sam and Dean both stop in their tracks and throw matching glares at their little brother. "Hell, all four of us lost our moms when we were really young, so don't pretend like you knew her, Sam, because we all know you don't remember a damned thing about her."

Lily knew what was going to happen before it did, but it still shocked her to some extent. Sam quickly drew his arm back and slapped Adam across the face so hard that it knocked him backwards a step. The resounding smack was extremely loud and echoed in the apartment's parking lot. Sam probably hadn't meant to do it, but that didn't mean he regretted it.

Adam glared up at Sam, clearly resisting the urge to rub his now reddening cheek. The tension in the air was even thicker than before; no one said anything for what seemed to be hours.

None of the Winchester kids were a stranger to being hit like that. John was always one for physical punishments, especially since the four of them didn't have very many privileges to take away in the first place. Just because Lily was the youngest and a girl didn't mean that she was exempt from the psychical punishments their father gave out, and Lily couldn't help but feel at least the slightest bit grateful that he treated her equally to her brothers.

"Don't you dare talk about my mother like that," Sam sneered, giving Adam a death glare that would make any normal person piss their pants. But Adam wasn't normal, he was a Winchester. And, besides, he knew Sam and wasn't scared of him. At least, he pretended not to be. With one final glare towards his brother, Adam stormed off in the direction of the Impala.

"So," Lily broke the silence, awkwardly, once Adam was out of earshot. "I really don't care if you come with us or not, Sam, you made your choice four years ago and you'll probably pick the same one now."

Sam scoffed. "I was just going to college, Lily, it was Dad who said if I leave that I should stay gone," He spoke. "And that's what I'm doing."

"You still abandoned us, Sam. If you hadn't abandoned us you would've answered our phone calls." Lily wasn't sure when she started standing up to people like this, she had never been very brave before, but she liked it.

She knew her newfound bravery may have stemmed from going on her first real hunt a month beforehand. It had been that simple salt and burn with her father, the one where she had gotten hurt. It hadn't been the best experience, and John had been so disappointed and angry with her.

"Look, I'm sorry, okay?" Sam asked, hoping for his little sister's forgiveness. "You're right, I should've answered your calls. I'll pick up from now on, I swear."

Lily was quiet for a moment, thinking over what he had said. "I want to forgive you, Sam, I really do, but I haven't heard anything from you in a little over four years. I was seven when you left! I needed all my big brothers there for me!" She exclaimed, her tone turning whiny, again, much to her dismay. She quickly headed back to the Impala, hopping into the back seat next to Adam.

"You alright?" She asked him, after a moment of silence.

"Yeah," Adam replied, not looking at her.

"You know you shouldn't've pushed him so far," She remarked, trying to keep her tone casual.

"Whatever," Adam scoffed. "He left us for four years, I think he deserves some sort of karma or something."

Lily nodded. "Yeah, but you know talking about their mom is a touchy subject. You had that slap coming whether you like it or not."

Adam sighed, always the stubborn one. "Probably, but that doesn't mean I'll apologize or anything."

Lily didn't say anything else, and she and Adam just sat there in silence. It wasn't an awkward or tense silence, but a comfortable one. She was always comfortable around Adam; he was her best friend, after all.