Zootopia buzzed with activity. The heat had been climbing for weeks; every district felt like Sahara Square and word had it that the maintenance teams for the Tundratown coolers were working back to back shifts just to keep the things limping along. The streets heaved with mammals as tides of herds, packs and the occasional loner washed through the city, flooding each street and alleyway. The mayoral election were in full swing and after the scandals of the Lionheart and Bellweather administrations the race had taken on a vicious edge as candidates looked for any dark secret or past mistake their opponents may be hiding.

And yet, even in times such as these, there were some things that never changed.

In Sahara Square there was one street in particular that was suspiciously quiet. It wasn't deserted, but a certain atmosphere of menace seemed to permeate the air. This was not a street one would bustle down without good reason and one especially wouldn't bustle into the rather nondescript, dimly-lit bar sitting in the middle of the row of abandoned shopfronts and discount stores, for if you found yourself bustling into this place uninvited you ran the considerable risk of not being able to bustle your way back out.

It was known among the local underworld to be filled with some of the most bloody-minded people in the city and common criminals avoided it like the plague,

Unfortunately for Geoffrey Hall, he and his gang were rather new to the town and hadn't had the chance to be briefed on just how dangerous this place was. To be fair, even if he had known it probably wouldn't have deterred him. Encouraged him, perhaps, he just would have better prepared himself. For Geoffrey Hall was one of those lucky few whose ignorance and confidence were so startling immense that they mixed together in some sort of alchemical reaction that seemed to warp reality around him. His gang followed him with a sort of morbid curiosity, unable to believe the things he managed to get away with armed only with a winning smile and a foolishness so overflowing it came around the other side and looked like a kind of wisdom in the right light.

Like that time they'd robbed Downtown Charlie's gambling den on Charlie's birthday. No-one dared to cross Charlie, the wolverine was notorious for never forgetting a slight and they'd just waltzed into his own place to rob him. They'd managed to get away with an entire month's takings and a furious Charlie swearing he'd have their hides for floor rugs. But just as the gang was fleeing out the back, a task force called by the commotion had stormed the den and arrested everyone still in the place, including most of the members of Charlie's upper management. Even then they wouldn't have got far, but several of his lieutenants jumped at the deals offered and now Charlie wouldn't see the light of day until he was an old, old wolverine. As the struggle for the new leader of the organization continued, most forgot about Hall and his gang. Those who did remember were grateful for the opportunity he'd provided.

It sometimes felt to the gang that the universe took pity on the reckless mule and went out of its way to make things work for him. They believed that if Geoffrey tripped and fell off a cliff, his fall would be cushioned by sacks of dollar bills. Regardless, he had established himself as a figure of some renown within the underworld community.

The group scurried down the strangely quiet street. Well, they scurried while Geoffrey… it was hard to tell what Geoffrey was doing, it seemed like he had difficulty deciding between a strut and a swagger and seemed to be doing his best to combine them both into one walk; it was less than elegant but it somehow suited his gangly frame. His ratty, green frock coat flapped behind him and his completely unnecessary cane clicking on the pavement with each step.

The gang's eyes darted to the quiet buildings on either side of the street, noticing a few lights on in some of the upper rooms, but no other activity. The sign-less building they were passing seemed to be the only place open at this time of night.

Geoffrey had noticed how quiet the street was and took it as his naturally charmed life once again providing his due rewards. He and his boys had been wandering around the city for hours now, having arrived in the city earlier that afternoon by train, getting accustomed to the feel of the city and looking for an opportunity to make their first mark.

Noticing the lone building, he walked up to one of the small windows through which the light inside the building was desperately trying to escape. No mule for subtlety, Geoffrey practically wiped his face across the glass, trying to peer in but seeing little of substance through the grimy window other than that it appeared to be a bar and was considerably full.

Walking back to the edge of the pavement he looked up and down the street, satisfied that the bar was suitably isolated and that they were unlikely to be uninterrupted once they got going. He spun around to his patiently watching crew and stuck a pose. They were all pretty sure that he practiced these in front of a mirror when he was alone.

"Alright, my fine friends, ready for a little work?" he asked.

A look of uncertainty passed between the gang.

"This place? Ain't it a little…" said Trevor the stoat as he rolled his shoulders uncertainly.

"Rundown? I mean, how much cash are they really gonna have on them, Geoff?" added Kevin, a rather greasy looking ibex who looked as if might of heard of a bath before, but that was probably the closest he'd ever come to one.

Geoffrey frowned in disappointment at Kevin, which was one of the toughest parts about working for the foppish mule. He didn't get angry with them, he got disappointed. It was like working for your mother. Kevin sighed wearily, struggling not to roll his eyes.

"Sorry, but they're not going to have a lot of cash, are they Geoffrey?'

The cheery grin returned to his face as the mule spun and raised both hands to take in the dismal little building in front of them. "This isn't about the big score, boys, this is just our welcome to the city. We'll pick up a little scratch here, get out names out there and then we can go and get properly tooled up for some proper work. You don't see Rufus complaining, do you?"

The trio turned to look at the fourth member of the group, a large bison that loomed over them all, he was so large that he seemed to be in a permeant loom. Looming was his resting state. He blinked heavily at the three of them with a look that saw little to interest him and then went back to staring blankly at nothing.

"Yeah, well Rufus never complains cus Rufus' brain runs about five minutes behind the rest of reality most times, doesn't it?" said Trevor.

He eyed the bison. He knew Rufus wasn't stupid, even though he looked like he'd rather eat a book then read one. It was just whenever they weren't actively working the bison seemed to have all reaction time and wit of a rock. Which was what it made it so odd when they went on a job; it was just like someone flipped a switch and he'd be just as sharp as the rest of them. Trevor had begun to suspect that the bison was just so lazy that he'd managed to perfect some sort of way to shut his brain off so he didn't have to use it except when he absolutely had to. God knew that thinking tired Trevor out, that's why he mostly left it up to Geoffrey.

"Now, now, none of that, all of us have our faults." As he said this the mule pulled the stoat and the ibex in from behind for a comradely hug, waving at Rufus to join them to no avail. The two smaller animals struggled futilely as they dangled in his firm grip. 'But together we cover for each other, together we've hit every town and city of note on this coast, together we're going to rob Zootopia blind! Am I right?"

Trevor and Kevin hung limply, doing their best not to look at each other in their equally embarrassing situation, mumbling an unintelligible agreement, somehow inspired by the mule's speech despite the gut-wrenching humiliation.

"They say in this city anyone can be anything, well we're going to be bloody infamous!"

Geoffrey loosened his grip and they scrambled free, falling to the ground, coughing and tugging at their clothes for an embarrassed moment before turning back to their leader.

"Fair enough, fair enough," grumbled Kevin, "but we'd better get a move on then, while it's still quiet."

Geoffrey nodded graciously and pulled out a pocket mirror to examine himself, preening and making sure he looked his best as his gang pulled out an assortment of knives, brass knuckles and cudgels. Not enough to scare anyone serious, but certainly enough to handle a bar full of civilians.

"Now then, we've done this a thousand times, you all know your roles. In and out, keep them scared, keep them in line and keep casualties low. Let's be classy about this." He shot a warning glance at Trevor, "That means no more of those improvised jokes about the tiny pianist."

Trevor lowered his head and mumbled, "Sheila thought it was really funny…"

"Sheila is a delightful girl but she's paid to find you amusing, just stick with the approved banter. We want to make a good first impression on this town."

They all nodded as he ran through the familiar spiel, hopping and shaking limbs to loosen themselves up before following the mule as he swept grandly through the battered door and into the dimly lit bar.

Judy stabbed at her fork at her dinner with a little too much enthusiasm.

"All I'm saying is that if you keep on with the snarky comments in the briefings we're going to be stuck on the night shift until retirement." She punctuated the statement with a thrust of her fork at the fox sitting opposite her, salad dressing flying across the table at him.

Nick was gingerly lifting the edge of the lettuce on top of his meal, examining with considerable doubt the supposed food beneath. "Is this really edible? I can't even tell what this is." He poked at the greyish-purple heap which jiggled ominously. He was sure that he'd caught it moving out of the corner of his eye, but his mind denied the possibility that there might be something in the world that looked like that and could possibly come after him for revenge.

Judy rolled her eyes, "I never thought Slick Nick would be such a picky eater." She crunched at her salad, or tried to, but it was so drenched in oil and grease that it just made and unpleasant squelching noise.

"What can I say? My body is a temple."

"To what? Debauchery?"

Nick grinned and shrugged, shutting his eyes as he brought his own fork to his mouth in a move he was sure he was going to regret. He grimaced for a moment as he chewed for a few moments before swallowing.

"See? Not so bad, right?" asked Judy.

"I can't tell if it's just bland or if all my tastebuds have just shut down in a desperate attempt to save me from the taste."

Judy grinned and threw a napkin at him, "Oh grow up, fox."

Nick smirked back but kept eating, "I'm serious, I think my tongue is going numb. Why are we even eating here anyway? I know a thousand joints in this city better than this dive."

"Better get used to it Nick, you're a cop now and this is our official watering hole."

The bar was almost entirely full of cops; either just off their shift or, like them, grabbing a quick bite during the night shift. The conversation never seemed to rise above a low background murmur; this was a place to come fortify yourself before the job or to help you forget some of the casual tragedies you might see on patrol. It wasn't a place for an exciting night out.

The already dim light of the bar was further darkened as a shadow fell across their booth. They both looked up at the massive elderly hippo towering over them, clad in the dirtiest apron Nick had ever seen, his sleeves rolled to his elbows and a grimy cloth in his hand.

"Tony!" Judy beamed up cheerfully at the barman.

The hippo was just as much a fixture of the building as the ancient tables or the rows of unlabeled bottles behind the bar. There were other staff, but no matter what hour you came in, Tony would be there. It was widely known he was he had been a sergeant back when Bogo had first joined up, but as to what had led him to working at the bar, no-one knew which of a dozen theories was the correct one. Or if any of them were even correct.

"Hey Hopps, how's the salad?"

"You're getting better, I'm almost sure I won't get food poisoning this time."

The hippo barked a laugh that reverberated throughout the bar, playfully swinging a meaty fist to cuff her round the ears that she casually ducked, grinning back.

"What happened to that polite little bunny that came in here this first month on the job? Hope this fox isn't having a bad influence on you." He turned his gaze to Nick as he tucked his washcloth into his apron and held out his hand. "Nice to meet you, Wilde, been hearing some buzz that a fox was going through the academy. Well done on making it."

The smile stayed on Nick's face, but took on a slightly frozen air at the backhanded compliment. "You too Tony, it's rare that I meet someone so non-patronizing." He held out his paw and was surprised to find the hippo didn't try to crush his fingers in the handshake, though he was clearly capable of it; the hippo's arms were as thick as tree-trunks. Judy darted a glance at Nick when she heard the familiar phrase, but said nothing as Tony bellowed another laugh.

"A sarcastic fox? Will wonders never cease? Can I get either of you something to drink?"

Judy shook her head, "No thanks, we've the rest of our shift ahead of us, just wanted to show Nick the place."

He nodded at Judy and moved on to another booth to chat with McHorn and Grizzoli.

"Friendly guy." Nick went back to picking at his meal, no more enthusiastic than before, but focused on it as if expecting it to suddenly get up from his plate and walk off. A pregnant silence stretched between them for a moment.

"Tony didn't mean anything by that, he just likes to poke a little-"

Nick looked up, a little shocked at the faint note of apology in Judy's voice. "Woah, Fluff, it's fine, I'm not made of glass you know? I know how to take a joke."

Ever since he'd officially reported to Precinct One earlier that week she'd been going out of her way to bring him around and introduce him to everyone. She was obviously eager for him to be accepted by his new coworkers and had boasted about him like a proud mother talking about their kits school achievements. Most of the officers treated him cordially, he even received a few sympathetic looks as he was slowly roasted on the fires of Judy's humiliatingly earnest praise.

He had been surprised to find that he could put up with snide remarks or cutting jokes much easier than honest admiration. After spending a little time in the locker room and hearing the barbs traded between the other officers on topics ranging from species to parentage he was happy enough to roll with the punches, quite pleased that he didn't seem to be treated any differently than the others. Sure he was a sneaky fox, but the wolves were idiots, the lions were arrogant and the rhinos… well, everyone knew what they said about rhinos. A few of the officers were a little too hostile, but on the whole, he felt like just another cop.

He'd long gotten over that disaster of a press conference. Mostly. But it seemed that Judy had yet to fully forgive herself for her poorly chosen statements. Most of the time it didn't matter, but at times it was like she was treading on eggshells around him and that made him just as twitchy in return. Thankfully she seemed to be mellowing out as time passed and the event became a hazy memory. She'd gotten past the self-loathing phase and had moved on to jumping to his defense at any perceived slight. Progress. Now that they were partnered together fulltime they could hopefully get back into their comfortable dynamic that had helped them crack their first case together.

"What makes you think that isn't my plan anyway?" He asked, throwing her a lifeline.

She looked back up at him, her eyebrow raised quizzically.

"Do you really think Nick Wilde, criminal mastermind, would be on the night shift if he didn't want to be?"

"You-" She shook her head, clearing her head of the awkwardness and thinking back to their earlier conversation. "You want the night shift? No-one wants the night shift!"

"What can I say? Maybe not all foxes are shifty, nocturnal skulkers, but I'm really more of a night person. And I get to have a little fun with Bogo and get away with it too." He waggled his eyebrows at her and took a satisfied bite of the purple mess, his face grimacing as he was suddenly felt something completely alien on his tongue and was left with the option of swallowing and hoping for the best or spitting it out and having to face whatever horror had been in his mouth. He chose ignorance and swallowed.

Judy laughed at the look of horror that crossed his face, well acquainted with the 'eccentricities' of Tony's cooking. "You sly fox. I'd tell Bogo, but I admit I prefer the night shift at the moment. All the really interesting cases turn up around now, the day shift have their hands full with crowd control at the rallies. And speaking of our shift, we'd better get back to it."

Suddenly, the door to the bar was flung open.

Geoffrey walked in a few feet before planting himself proudly, back straight, his cane cracking loudly into the ground demanding the attention of everyone in the bar as he threw his other hand out theatrically. The low murmuring of conversation was abruptly cut off as his friends flowed around him and deeper into the bar, spacing themselves out evenly to try and cover all the bar patrons.

"Ladies and gents, you have my very best congratulations for you have the most esteemed honor of having drawn the attention of myself, Geoffrey the Gent, and my very good friends, Trevor, Kevin and Rufus."

"Uh, Geoff…"

He began to pace along the bar, flourishing his cane as he really began to enjoy himself. "We're famed from north to south as the very best of criminals. I defy you to find a city within 200 miles that hasn't felt the touch of our craft. And you now have the very good fortune of financing our work here in your very own Zootopia!"

"Geoff…"

"Not everyone has this honor, you know? Most people, when robbed, have to settle for petty thugs. With us, you can be secure in the knowledge that you are contributing to the pockets of mammals with class. With breeding. With grand plans. One day you will have the opportunity to point at us in the newspaper or on the television and tell your children 'Ihelped them get to where they are today."

"Geoffrey," whined Trevor.

"So if you'll just place all valuables into the bags as my companions round your tables we can finish this with no harm to you and we'll be on our merry way. Sound good?"

A deafening silence answered him for a long moment.

"Oh, Geoff, you utter dickhead…" muttered Kevin.

Geoffrey glared over at Kevin, he really was being unprofessional, a most damning accusation in Geoffrey's mind.

He turned his gaze back to the watching crowd, bowing with a look of apology plastered across his face, like an actor apologizing for a colleague who had forgotten their lines. He liked to give people a show; money was nice, but what Geoffrey really thrived on was admiration. He took pride that most of the people he robbed seemed to genuinely enjoy the experience.

As he straightened up he truly looked at his 'audience' for the first time. They were wearing a surprising amount of blue.

A tableau of two dozen cops stared at him with looks of absolute crogglement. Utter stillness descended on the bar for a full ten seconds before a tiger seated near the entrance leaned over slowly and bolted the bar door before leaning back to watch what happened next. The bolt sounded like a nail being hammered into a coffin.

"Oh." Geoffrey took a deep breath, his eyes darting back and forth. "Dear."

The silence continued. Trevor was glancing around nervously, Kevin had dropped his knife and had covered his eyes with one hand and Rufus looked like he'd never bothered to turn on his brain. What was the point, really?

A lone snicker started up somewhere near the back of the bar, breaking the spell that had been holding everyone. A bellowing snort joined it and within moments the entire bar was alive with the sound of raucous laughter as they pounded on the tables with hoof, paw and claw. The cops went wild, dust falling from the rafters as the entire building trembled with their amusement. The larger mammals bawled loudly as a few wolf officers howled and catcalled the unfortunate gang.

Geoffrey looked around the rioting crowd, surprised to find himself quite enjoying it. Not quite the reaction he had been hoping to get, but it was definitely as a memorable way to start his career in Zootopia. All he had to do was figure out how he was going to get out of here and he'd have quite a story to tell. His eyes darted around looking for an opportunity. Thankfully no-one seemed to be in a rush to detain them as there seemed no chance of them escaping. But if Geoffrey had learned anything in his many years of crime, fate always provided him a way out of a sticky situation, all he had to do was find it.

His eyes passed over an empty booth he was standing next to before darting back to it. It wasn't empty; it's just that the two officers there were much smaller than the rest of their colleagues. A small red fox whose jaw was hanging open in disbelief at the stupidity of the gang and an even smaller rabbit officer who was just within arm's reach.

His practiced and professional grin returned to his face as he leaned over and plucked the rabbit out of her seat, holding her by the scruff of her Kevlar vest. His other hand deftly twisted the top of his cane which popped off, revealing a knife only a few inches long but decidedly sharp.

The bar suddenly quieted again as he took a step or two back, his confidence returning. "Gents. Ladies. It appears we've made a wrong turn. As I said, we are rather new in town and it appears we have chosen out first venue a little… unwisely. My apologies for interrupting your evening but we'll just be on our way with your lovely friend here." He waggled his blade at the watching crowd, warning them not to move. "No need to worry about her, once we're safely away you have my word she will be released completely unharmed."

Trevor and Kevin had scurried over to stand behind Geoffrey, sheltering in his shadow. Rufus plodded over at a slower pace, still running on low-power mode.

Geoffrey studied the crowd to make sure they understood. There was something…. odd about them. They didn't seem nervous or worried for their friend at all. Some were leaning on the table with chins resting in their hands; a few were nudging each other and trying to stifle chuckles. Some had even started drinking again! It was like they were a crowd waiting for the next punch line in a show. Maybe this rabbit wasn't very popular?

He frowned and waved his knife a little more theatrically, wanting to make sure everyone could see it, the grim light of the bar bouncing off it dully. "I'm serious, people. I am not a violent mule but I'll do what must be done. Nobody leaves their seat for, say, five minutes. If anyone tries to come after us… well, I'm afraid your little bunny mascot won't be coming back to you in such a cute state." Yes,he thought,that sounded suitably menacing. Gosh, I'm good.

A mist of beer suddenly sprayed through the air as several of the cops who had gone back to drinking suddenly did spit-takes. The laughter arose again, if anything, louder than before. Some collapsed into each other's arms, propping each other up. Several appeared to be crying, crying, with laughter. The fox seemed to be having convulsions; he was lying on his side and clutching his stomach, howling with laughter every time he looked back up at his friend held a knifepoint.

Geoffrey edged closer to his gang, truly unnerved for the first time he could remember. These animals areabsolutelyinsane. There was something else odd about their laughter, it didn't seem to be quite directed at him, but rather the little rabbit dangling in his outstretched hand.

He let the rabbit slowly twist in his hoof until she was facing him. He rather wished he hadn't. Her shoulders were tense and her ears pressed flat down against the back of her head. She was just a tiny little rabbit. But that look…

That look promised revenge.

That look promised vengeance.

That look promised the destruction of his body, the scattering of his ashes and the obliteration of his soul.

Perhaps choosing this bar had been a mistake.

Judy trembled like an overpowered dynamo ready to explode. It was harder to tell if she was more fueled by anger or embarrassment. Her foot beat furiously at the air, fast as a hummingbird's wings; if she'd been on the ground the floorboards would be shuddering.

As the mule flinched back from her death-glare she reached up and unsnapped her shoulder strap, going limp and slipping out of it with ease. Before the mule even had a chance to look down she landed in a crouch, lifted one leg and kicked with every ounce of strength she had. The heel of her foot cracked into the side of the mule's ankle, sending him sprawling sideways with an agonized squawk.

The mule stared up in her in horror as she leapt at his now conveniently accessible face, wilder than if she'd been hit with a dozen Nighthowler pellets. She was inches away from her prey when she felt a pair of arms sliding under hers and pulling her back from her target.

She found herself held aloft by a laughing Nick as she kicked furiously toward the mule. He had suddenly appeared behind her and had obviously been ready to move when she had provided the chance. Similarly, McHorn, Rhinowitz and Grizzoli had erupted from their seats; a mountain of fur and hide barreling forward to take down the other three members of the gang, though they provided little resistance as the still laughing cops tackled them.

"Easy, Carrots, easy, you don't want to have a stroke, do you? Breathe with me, come on. In- haaaah, and out- haaaaah!"

"Damn, Wilde, I thought you were supposed to be the savage one in that partnership!" Wolford howled through tears of laughter from the other end of the bar.

Fangmeyer whacked Wolford on the shoulder, "What are you talking about? Hopps ain't savage! She's cute!"

The bar erupted in a new round of laughter and cheers. Within moments the entire bar was chanting "Cute! Cute! Cute!" Pounding whatever surface was closest with each syllable roared. Judy hung limply in Nick's grip, her head hung low for a few verses before her shoulders began to shake. Nick peered round to look at her face, seeing her eyes closed and a grin spread across her face, her face flushed with a happy embarrassment.

He set her down gingerly, ready to scoop her up again if she went for the still dazed Geoffrey. She just stood with her head down before raising her arms in a weak victory pose, eliciting another cheer from the crowd along with a few wolf whistles before everyone began to gather around the cowering unfortunate gang.

Grizzoli and McHorn pushed the last of the gang into the back of Nick and Judy's cruiser. It had taken a while to get the gang out of the bar as a lot of the cops had insisted on getting pictures taken with them. They'd also been given a standing invitation to come back whenever they got free; something rare for any civilian, never mind active criminals. It had been generally agreed that the gang had earned it.

"Thanks guys," said Nick as he walked around to the passenger side and threw them a lazy salute. "Enjoy the rest of the night."

McHorn grinned as he walked backwards to the bar, "How could we not after that? You two stay safe out there." As they opened the bar to the door the chanting of another "Cute! Cute! Cute!" escaped before the door closed behind them.

Judy hopped behind the wheel, turning on the engine as she belted up. Her head snapped around to shoot a glare at the cowed prisoners in the back who flinched as if struck.

"Come on, Carrots, don't scare the poor little criminals. They've had a rough evening."

Judy continued to glare for a long moment before slowly turning away from them and pulling out of the parking lot to head back to the station. The streets were beginning to quiet, the late hour and sweltering combining to drive most back to their air-conditioned homes.

The silence of the car was broken by hum of the engine and the blast of the AC.

"Do you ever think I might be some sort of god?" Nick wondered as he stared out the side window.

A groan shuddered over from Judy's side of the car.

"No, quiet, listen to me. Maybe not a god but I'm definitely supernaturally blessed." He turned to face her. "I was an amazing confidence fox, right? One of the best. The best. You have to admit you were completely taken in the first time we met." He nodded encouragingly.

Judy continued to stare at the dark road ahead of them, not even bothering to acknowledge him.

"And I thought that I was just really good at it. Natural talent or something. But is anyone this good?" Nick continued. "I mean, here we are, not one week after me starting and we have idiots throwing themselves at us to get arrested. No one has that kind of magnetic personality; clearly I have some sort of magical charisma that draws them to me."

A smile tugged at the corner of Judy's mouth, her nose twitching in amusement.

"It's a good thing you convinced me to use my powers for good. Who knows what diabolical things I could accomplish otherwise?" He held out his paw beatifically. "I won't forget your place in helping me, oh faithful bunny, you shall be my first disciple. Or should that be 'thou shalt be mine first disciple'?"

"Oh hush!" Judy threw him an amused look. "The only amazing thing about you is how you haven't been crushed by the weight of that enormous ego."

She spun the wheel as they turned onto the street leading to Savannah Central and the police headquarters. "It's all this election fever; the city's packed with all these supporters and where there are crowds you'll get criminals. It'll probably all die down in a few weeks, but we'll be busy until then. I foresee a lot pickpockets in our future."

The campaigns had been simmering for the last few months but had intensified in recent weeks as the election day got closer and closer. Every candidate was holding multiple rallies per day and every cop was run ragged. Keeping order at the events and preventing clashes between supporters was hard enough and but it seemed that every visitor from the boroughs had never heard of the concept of crime. Muggings alone had tripled in the last week as it seemed that every visitor had suddenly decided that a thorough nighttime exploration of every alleyway in Zootopia was suddenly the best idea they'd ever had.

Nick shrugged, "Oh well, we've already made a name for ourselves with the Nighthowlers, I guess we can coast on picking up petty criminals for a while." He suddenly jumped forward, startled as something crashed against the steel mesh cage between them and the back of the cruiser.

"Uh, actually, Officer Hopps. Miss Judy." The mule, Geoffrey he had said his name was, had slammed his head against the cage as he grinned down at her, a manic light in his eyes. "Judy, if I may…"

The bunny gritted her teeth and spat through them. "You may not."

"Aha, of course… well, Officer Hopps, I really don't want to contradict you but it's not just myself and my boys that decided to descend upon Zootopia, you know? A couple of big names are making their way to the city."

Nick barked a laugh, "Oh, is there some other circus that's on its way? At least we'll have some entertainment over the next few weeks."

Geoffrey glared down at the fox, clearly biting back a few remarks, "Despite our… 'poor luck' this evening, we are a rather accomplished group I'll have you know. I'm not sure who made the first move on your city or why they came, but we didn't want them to get too much of a headstart, so… along we came."

Judy's ears had perked up and turned to the mule, her eyes still focused on the road. "Oh, and who exactly is coming?"

The smile immediately returned to Geoffrey's face. "Oh, plenty! Let's see… Top Shelf Henry should be here already. Oh, and I heard Anubis Brothers were interested! Ahmm… I think Jagged Annie should be on her way…"

"Top Shelf Henry? What kind of name is that?" asked Nick.

"Gerbil burglar. Has a whole set of custom climbing gear, the fellow can get anywhere."

"The Blind Jacksons," chimed the ibex in the back seat.

"Leopold and the Spots, too," added the stoat.

"Okay, no, enough. Leopold and the Spots?"Nick choked out, "You can't be serious. What's with all these goofy names?"

Geoffrey frowned at the fox, obviously annoyed, "Listen, fox, you're obviously new to this world. People in our business have to have a little character. A little class. It's what sets us apart from the common criminals. Come back to me when you have a little more experience."

Nick stared at him in disbelief, his jaw dropped, at a loss for words. He was being talked down to by someone who had just tried to rob a cop bar? He turned to Judy for support only to find her with a death-grip on the wheel, her shoulders shaking as she bit her lower lip, desperately trying not to burst into laughter.

"Judy…" he frowned, cautioning her not to-

"Bwahahahaha! Oh yes! Only a really petty crook wouldn't have an alias." They pulled up to a red light and she took the moment to hit Nick with a wide cheeky grin. "Someone with zeroclass," she continued teasingly. He opened his mouth to protest back but stopped himself; he'd had enough fun at her expense earlier, fair was fair.

He threw himself back into the seat, folding his arms and staring out the window in a sulk. Fair was fair, but he didn't have to like it.

Geoffrey seemed a little puzzled at the exchange but was encouraged by Judy's lightening mood.

"So, Miss Judy, you'll see there's plenty of opportunity out there to scoop up some well-deserved accolades. There's no need for you to bother with petty pickpockets."

Judy pursed her lips and glanced at the mule with half-lidded eyes before turning back to her driving. "And why are you telling us all this 'Geoffrey the Gent'? Most people wait until they're in front of a judge before they start trying to work out a deal."

Geoffrey suddenly lowered his head, looking a little bashful as he twiddled his hoofs. "Oh, does a mammal really need a reason want to help out such an admirable lady?"

Everyone in the car froze as Geoffrey let out a simpering giggle. Judy kept her eyes locked on the road but every other pair of eyes was drawn inexorably to stare at the blushing mule with the cheerful grin. The stoat and the ibex had their mouths hanging open in disbelief, and Nick could only imagine his own expression was a mirror image. Even the bison, who Nick had thought was some sort of catatonic, seemed stunned by this… this… whatever this was.

Nick turned back to look at the frozen rabbit.

"Ju-"

"Ssh!"

"Bu-"

"Nobody speaks. Not a word. From anyone. We're almost at the station. And this part of the conversation is not going into any reports. Because it never happened." Every sentence was terse but bright, delivered in a lilting tone that somehow brooked no argument. You could try to talk with her, but she would definitely not be a happy bunny.

A silence filled the car as everyone tried to avoid looking at anyone else. Except Geoffrey, who didn't seem disheartened by Judy's reaction at all and managed to get away with humming happily to himself as he stared at the back of Judy's head through the cage.

Hours later Judy and Nick were back in the cruiser and leaving the station. Geoffrey's claim they were master criminals seemed a little more plausible, as they all seemed completely unfamiliar with the booking procedure. Well, maybe not master criminals but they'd certainly avoided arrest before now. The already tedious task was lengthened by the stubborn Geoffrey who refused to cooperate with anyone but Judy, despite numerous threats of obstruction charges. As they were led away to the cells the departing Geoffrey had yelled a fond goodbye to Judy, drawing odd looks from the few officers scattered around the lobby.

By the time the pair had gotten back to their cruiser the streets had emptied as late night turned to early morning. They drove in silence for a few minutes before pulling over to the side of the road.

"Well…" Nick rubbed at the back of his head. "That was… interesting."

Judy lightly slammed her forehead against the steering wheel, punctuating her words with little thuds.

"Why. Do I. Attract. All. These. Weirdoes?"

Nick leaned over and placed his paw on her shoulder. "Okay Fluff, relax, I don't need a concussed bunny driving me about." He flashed her his trademark smirk. "And not everyone is strange, at least you have me."

She looked him up and down for a moment, shut her eyes and went back to thudding her head against the steering wheel.

"Do you think he was serious?" she asked, her head throbbing more from the events of the night than her headbutts.

Nick raised an eyebrow, "Carrots, I think you can do a little better than that idiot."

"Not that! About all these… gangs and professionals coming to the city?"

"Oh, right." He shrugged, "Could be, but after seeing those guys I can't really say I'm worried. Anyway, Mr Big has a pretty strong grip on Tundratown and he's always watching out for anyone making a move on the other districts, it won't be easy for them to muscle in without his approval."

She thought back on the intimidating little arctic mouse she'd met so soon after coming to the city. She still met with Fru Fru regularly but she'd made a conscious decision not to involve herself any further with her father, worried where such a relationship might lead.

"You're probably right, but tensions in the city are already so high. The last thing we need is a bunch more idiots looking to make a name for themselves." Between the elections, the heat and crime, it felt like the melting pot that was Zootopia was ready to boil over any minute.

A comfortable silence descended between them. Judy studied her partner as he drummed a steady tattoo his armrest; he really had reveled in his lies the first time she had met him. It hadn't just been about the money, had it? It was what he could get away with, too. The question would eat away with her and she just had to ask, "Did you ever have a nickname?"

Nick immediately stopped drumming, his head turning slightly to avoid her piercing gaze. His jaw was clenched tightly as a slight blush came to his face. He stared out at the darkness beyond the window, pretending not to have heard the question.

Her face lit with excitement as she leapt to her feet and shook his shoulder with both paws, "You did? Oh, come on Nick! What was it? You have to tell me; I promise I won't laugh." This seemed unlikely as her eyes were already alive with laughter, eager to have this embarrassing part of her partner's past.

The radio suddenly squawked to life "Car 93, car 93, respond,' came the voice of Clawhauser.

Nick snatched the handset, grateful for the reprieve. "This is 93, we read you, what's happening Claws?"

Clawhauser's voice was missing that joyful bounce that so well matched the leopard's personality, "Another 10-55 for you two; the Sahara Square Fountain Plaza. A security guard called it in. Forensics are already on the way. Could be a jumper."

"Got it, we're on our way." He placed the handset back on its latch as Judy pulled the cruiser out onto the empty street.

"This conversation isn't over," she warned her friend with an overly sweet smile.