There is a lump in my throat as the bus stops where I am to be let out. Georg had given me the day off to go visit the Abbey. I am going back there to let Reverend Mother know that I will never be coming back as a nun. She will never believe that I'm going to be a married woman; I can't believe it myself. If it wasn't for this diamond ring on my finger I could swear this was all a dream.

My feet feel as though they aren't even touching the ground as I begin to make my long walk back. I haven't been this nervous since my first day going to the Von Trapp's. I sing that same, silly confidence song that I sang. I ask myself what I am so afraid of if I'm happy as I say I am? Even if Reverend Mother didn't approve, why would I let it hurt me so much? Because she's the only kind of mother figure I have, that's why. I would be heartbroken to see her heartbroken over me.

Next thing I knew I was standing at the gates. I rang the bell as I swallowed back more emotion and saliva. A single nun walks towards me and then starts to pick up speed as she seems to recognize who I am. I can't really tell who she is but as she comes forward I have a huge smile on my face.

"Maria, darling," Sister Margaretta swings the gates open and gives me a hug. "How I've missed you so!"

"I've missed you, too," I say, hugging her back.

"What are you doing here?" She asks while leaving my arms.

"I've come to see Reverend Mother," I confess.

"Oh, I'll run and tell her you're here," she says, doing as she says.

"Thank you."

I'm amazed at how quiet everything is. I hear no chanting nor singing and there really is nobody in sight. I would like to see some other familiar faces but I guess they are just unavailable for now. The only one that I'm glad is not here to see me is Sister Berthe. I love her dearly but I feel I don't need her hard, strong personality right now. I will look back on this day and realize what a blessing it was to have Sister Margaretta be the one to let me in.

"She will be happy to see you, Maria," Sister Margaretta says, taking me in by the hand. I breathe in and I breathe out. There was nowhere to run and nowhere to hide now.

'Reverend Mother," Sister Margaretta calls out to her as soon as we walk in the room. "Here she is."

"Thank you," she says, sending Sister Margaretta on her way. I kneel before Reverend Mother and kiss her hand.

"Why have you come to me today?" She asks me as soon as I stand up.

"To say goodbye," I admit right off the bat. This was not a time to skirt around things.

"Goodbye?" She was shocked; I knew she would be.

"I can't be a nun anymore."

"I don't understand, my child."

That was when I held up my hand to show her my ring. Her jaw practically drops to the floor as she sees it. She puts my hand in hers as she examines the magnificent diamond. How could she not? It was a glorious looking thing.

"I'm getting married."

"I figured that, my child. Who are you marrying?"

"Georg Von Trapp."

"The Captain? The father of the children?"

"Yes, Reverend Mother."

I had a feeling things would get kind of awkward and they did. There was a long pause after I had confessed who my groom would be. Then, she took my hands and put a smile on her face. A thread of hope; maybe things would be all right after all.

"How does your heart feel?"

"Happy."

"How does your head feel?"

"Fine."

"Then you are doing God's will. When your heart and your head are both clear, you know you are doing the right thing."

"I'm glad you are taking this so well."

"Why wouldn't I, child? Did you think that because you wouldn't be a nun anymore that God would love you less?"

"I don't know..."

"Maria," she says, putting a loving arm around me and leading me to her window. "Look at it outside."

"It is a beautiful day..."

"Yes. My child, you were meant for the outside world. God is outside these Abbey walls, you know. That is where you found love and remember the day I told you this: Wherever there is love, God is there."

"You aren't sad that I won't be coming back at all?"

"My child, you are the happiest I have ever seen you. When you came to me, you were broken but still smiling. I have never met a spirit as strong as yours. I knew that you would always know how to survive."

"Really?" I asked, so touched that tears were beginning to fall.

"Yes, you knew you had to give your heart a break and you let it fully heal. Now look at you, getting ready to get married. I couldn't have wished for better."

"Reverend Mother," I say, taking her hand again and kissing it. "You don't know how elated I am to hear you say this. I love you so."

She makes a sign of the cross over me once I let go of her hand. Then she takes my face in her hands and kisses my forehead. That was when she said something to me I will never forget.

"Me and God love you."