Okay, so this is going to be a really long story. Probably my longest one yet, but I'm in this for the long haul. I'll try to update often. I want to get this done before the end of the summer. Anyways, yes, this is a Sirius survives fanfic. Sirius is one of my favorite characters and I've always wanted to write this fanfiction. I took a few liberties with the story and some characters, but in the end, I think everything turns out a little better.

Now, without further ado, let the story begin!

EDIT: Someone pointed out that McGonagall isn't supposed to be there. A really good point. I've made some tweaks so that she can still be there. The first being that she wasn't hit by those spells the night before. The second is just some edits in the narrative below.

WARNING: I took a LOT of liberties with the story line. I am NOT trying to follow it super closely. Some characters may act differently. Please CALM down. Sheesh. Some reviewers are the WORST.

THIS IS EXTREMELY AU. I AM WRITING IN ALL CAPS SO THAT PEOPLE READ THIS PART SO THEY KNOW THIS. IS. EXTREMELY. AU.

I AM NOT JK ROWLING SO STOP EXPECTING ME TO BE THANK YOU.

Update as of 2018: By the way, there homosexuality and polygamy in this story. Fair warning given. Don't like. Don't read. I don't care if you don't like it. It's my story. If I burn in hell for being an open-minded, non-judgmental person then so be it. And I don't support bad things: If you're cheating on someone, that's not what I support. If your partners were forced into marriage with you, that's not what I support. True polygamy is loving and having a romantic relationship with more than one person at a time - if you truly love both of them then I celebrate you. Love is a beautiful thing and literally what Harry Potter is about so I don't think I'm in the wrong in any way. Seriously, don't bother reading this story if you have an issue with the rights of LGBTQ, women, and suppressed cultures throughout the world.

I am writing this for me and I will not change the story for anyone.

"Harry, will you just listen to me?"

Harry sighed and finally turned to look at his bushy-haired friend. Her dark eyes were fierce.

"Sirius is in trouble, Hermione." He said as he led the way back to the school. Ron, Ginny, Luna, and Neville joined them in the Entrance Hall.

"And there are a half-dozen people in this school with the ability to contact him." Hermione countered.

"And who do you suppose is actually going to believe me and see about him, eh? Dumbledore and McGonagall, maybe, but they're both gone."

"This is different, Harry. Besides, I think someone's already contacted Grimmauld Place."

The others stopped.

"Who? We haven't told anybody." Ron said.

"Yes, we have." Hermione said. "Remember 'He's got padfoot at the place where it's hidden'? You know, Snape isn't dim. I saw recognition in his eyes, like he knew what Harry meant. He knows who Padfoot is."

"She's got a point." Ginny agreed. "And the only way we'll know is if we find Snape."

"He's probably down in his dungeon." Ron said.

Harry had to agree with them. Snape did seem to have understood the message. But there was still one problem.

"Why would Snape care if Sirius is in danger, though? They hate each other." He argued as they headed down the stairs to the dungeon.

"Because Sirius knows quite a bit about the Order." Ginny said.

"Because Dumbledore'd be angry if he didn't." Ron said.

"Because it's not just about Sirius. It's about the whole wizarding world. Whatever their protecting is powerful enough for Voldemort to want it." Hermione said.

Neville and Luna said nothing, but Harry assumed they didn't completely understand what was going on.

As they neared Snape's office, they heard faint voices, but could not make out what they were saying.

"Who's he talking to?" Harry whispered.

"Let's find out." Hermione pushed Harry forward and they entered through the open door.

"Harry!" Cried a familiar voice, the owner of which proceeded to tackle Harry in a great bear hug.

"Sirius! You're alright?" Harry managed to say.

"'Course I am." Sirius assured him. He then stepped out of the way and they noticed the other two occupants of the room: Remus and Snape, the latter looking rather chagrined about his company.

"But what are you doing here?"

"Snape said you gave him a coded message after trying to use Umbridge's office to floo me." Sirius said. "Lucky you did, too. Dumbledore's led a team of Order members to the Department of Mysteries to protect the weapon."

"But what is the weapon?" Harry asked.

Sirius eyed him for a moment. "I have a feeling Dumbledore will be telling you all about it after this."

"So what do we do now?" Ron asked. "Wait and see what happens?"

"Well, I believe you lot have some explaining to do." Remus told them. "Professor Snape only told us what he knew, and that wasn't much. Let's go upstairs and find Professor McGonagall. She's just returned."

"Where was she, anyway?" Ron asked.

Everyone except for Snape went back upstairs to find Minerva McGonagall waiting for them in the Entrance Hall. She looked concerned but not particularly surprised, as though she'd already been briefed on what was happening.

"I've woken the other teachers. Everyone's on alert and standing guard around the school. With the exception of our High Inquisitor, however. I hope you six have a particularly good tale to explain her whereabouts, otherwise I'm going to have to take House points." The Deputy Headmistress said.

As always, it was impossible to tell whether she was joking or not. Either way, she led them to her office, where they each told their part in the night's events, tea and biscuits provided. Sirius, Remus, and McGonagall seemed to find Umbridge's fate quite amusing.

"Flitwick and I will retrieve her in the morning." She said with very little care.

Finally, Hermione explained why they went to see Snape and their arrival there ended the story.

Nobody spoke for a few minutes after, all of them turning the events over in their heads.

"I'd give him clothes, but he knows too much. Maybe he'll keel over if I scare him enough." Sirius said darkly.

"But Sirius!" Hermione cried. "Kreacher is-"

"Don't worry, Hermione." Remus interrupted. "Sirius will do nothing of the sort to Kreacher. He will, however, be ordering him to never leave Grimmauld Place unless he is specifically given a destination to go to."

Sirius crossed his arms but nodded. Hermione gave him a small glare, which he ignored.

At that moment, a light appeared in the window. A patronus flowed through the glass as though it weren't even there.

It spoke only six words in Moody's voice. "Battle over. Order won. None dead."

"Typical Mad-Eye. He's a man of few words." Sirius noted.

"A rather bothersome trait." McGonagall said. "If it weren't for my duties to the school I would go to the Ministry myself and find out what exactly happened."

"Voldemort tried to get the weapon, didn't he?" Harry asked, ignoring Ron's flinch at the name. "In the Department of Mysteries."

McGonagall raised an eyebrow. "The battle did indeed take place in the Department of Mysteries, according to the message I received from Kingsley Shacklebolt. With the Death Eaters on the move, I had the teachers and faculty take up posts around the school, just in case they decided to attack the school."

"I suppose all we can do now is wait for someone to give us more information." Sirius said, sounding rather mature.

"If the battle is already over, then the Order must have had prior knowledge of the attack." Hermione surmised.

"Not to my knowledge." McGonagall told her. Sirius and Remus shook their heads.

"Maybe Dumbledore knew, and he just didn't tell anyone." Harry suggested.

"Wouldn't be the first time." Sirius agreed, receiving sharp looks from both McGonagall and Remus.

"Professor," Harry said. "Where were you today?"

Professor McGonagall looked for a moment as though she wouldn't answer him.

"I was at an Order meeting. I deeply regret leaving the school with Dumbledore gone. It is a mistake I shall not make again."

At that moment, a bright light poured into the window once more, and they watched as a jack rabbit patronus hopped through the glass.

"Tonks." They heard Remus say.

"Meet in Dumbledore's office in five. Bring Wolf, Dog, Scar, and friends." Tonks' voice said.

"Gee, I wonder who Scar is." Ron said sarcastically, nudging Harry, who self-consciously rubbed his scar. It was tingling a bit.

"Who did she expect to be listening in on that?" Sirius asked. "And she really needs to come up with better names."

So that's the first chapter, and I hope it's got you interested. Sirius is alive and well. I know most people think the Battle of the Department of Mysteries is something Harry and his friends must take part in, but those people can write their own fanfictions if they don't agree with mine. In a fanfiction, anything and everything can and will happen.

I apologize for any typos or grammar errors. This hasn't been beta read like usual, and although I read over it myself before uploading, I can miss things.

SHOUTOUTS - replies to nice reviews (the rest of you can piss off)

xXMizz Alec VolturiXx -Thank you!

MonroesAudrey - Sirius is my favorite character, too. I'm glad you appreciate Tonks' codenames for everyone as well.

Teufel1987 - I appreciate your comments and I've tried my best for the story to make sense.

ObsessedWithHPFanFic - thank you for reading!

Kamikaze Black - Haha, yes. Emo is great. Not sure if I'll be writing it though.

sherryola - Hermione sticks up for him in the books actually. But thanks for the review.

Mary - It was a bit short. My average is about 1500 to 2000 words.

jediprankster - You're right. But I want her there so she's there. Also, jack rabbit is Tonks' canon Patronus before it becomes a wolf.

DarknessRebel - Yay! Thanks for the encouragement!

HeartsGlow - I'm writing on the assumption that Dumbledore had prior knowledge, which is totally not uncharacteristic of him, as we all know.

IrisMikaelson - Thanks. I hope you like the rest.

alix33 - I'm not sure what you mean. I suppose they were all eating biscuits...