Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I don't own the Tamora Pierce works. I wish I did, but I don't, so don't sue me. But you shouldn't sue me anyways because I don't have any money.

Summary: Set when Alanna is 16, after battle at Fort Drell but a few months before the midwinter festival. The plot, put simply, is that a thief sneaks into the palace disguised as a court lady. Beyond that I will say nothing.

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Amongst all of the loud conversations in the Dancing Dove, all of the drunk men singing, people arguing, and random snippets of facts, five men led a hushed discussion in a dark corner, each one never speaking above a whisper. The men continued speaking in quiet voices but suddenly stopped as a waitress walked up to the men.

"Are you going to sit here all night and just talk or will you go ahead and order something?" The girl, at about eighteen, had vibrant red tresses pulled up into a tight braid at the top of her head, and her golden-brown eyes had a flash in them that told them she was not one to mess with. "Well?"

George Cooper sighed, "I'll just have a glass of red wine, thanks." He was about to turn back to the other four to continue talking when she interrupted again-

"And the rest of you?" She was determined to get an order out of all of them, it seemed. In turn they order small drinks, if only to get her to leave. After she left, they began again, this time with quieter voices, as if hoping she would forget to return with their drinks if they were too quiet to bring attention.

But to no avail. She came back but five minutes later with George and another man's drink in her hands. "Wine for you, and an ale for you." With a small 'thunk' she set down the drinks, accepted the money they handed her and began to walk off when George grabbed her hand.

"I'd like my money purse back, please" His eyes met hers for an instant before she shifted them away. She nervously held the purse out for him to take, and the instant he had it back in his hands she began to apologize.

"I'm really sorry. If I had known that you would be able to tell...I won't steal from you again, I swear. No harm done, right? I mean, you have your money back..." She began to stammer and blush, making up excuses as to why she took it, even bowing deeply every few words. Finally George just nodded his head.

" Technically, I should be taking an ear for this," She paled at these words, realizing the consequences. "But... I won't. But next time, be more careful as to whom you're stealing from: it's not always wise to steal from the king of thieves."

She gasped. "Th-the king of thieves?! I-I didn't know! I'm so sorry...but, if you're the king of thieves..." She pulled something out of her pocket and smiled slightly, "Then you'll be wanting back the real coins, not the false ones I put in your purse."

George's eyebrows rose. "False coins?" He took out a coin from his purse. Sure enough, when examined closely, the coin had inaccuracies. "When did you...?"

"Well..." she paused. "Do you want your other things back as well?"

"Other things?" She had stolen more than just his purse?

"Yes." She gave him a straight face, though she seemed to be getting enjoyment from his confusion. Suddenly she began to take items out of her pockets, naming them as she took them out, " Your earing. And the brass buttons on your shirt. And the brass on your boots. And your socks. And..." She trailed off reluctantly, though obviously pleased at their confusion on how she had gotten his socks off while he was wearing boots.

"And...?" George prompted her, waiting for the final item she had stolen.

"Would you like your loincloths back?" She daintily held out them out, as the men around him began to guffaw at the look of surprise on his face.

George blanched. "How on earth?!"

"A small, useless talent. It has no real purpose, beyond the reward of the look on the person's face. Nothing important really. Don't ask me how I manage to, because if I tried to explain I think I'd mess up." The girl began to twirl a side lock of hair as the men merely stared at her in awe.

"When did you manage to steal all of this?" One of the men asked curiously. "And did you steal anything from me as well?"

"Here's how I steal," She began to explain, step by step, speaking a mile-a-minute "First off, I judge the observational abilities of the person I am going to steal from. After all, an unobservant noble is easier to steal from than an experienced man on the streets. Then, according to this, I steal just badly enough that they will notice and demand to have their purse back. As I apologize profusely to them, saying it will never happen again, I switch the coins in the purse to fake ones. Usually I stop there, but occasionally, using my left hand I steal the other things that the person has on them - watches, an earing, metal buttons, anything of value. And clothing items, for the thrill of imagining their surprise when they go home to find that they weren't wearing a loincloth. The trick works amazingly well, and is extremely simplistic." She stopped for a breath, exhausted from talking so much.

For a while there was silence. George quietly contemplated what her punishment should be when he suddenly got an idea. "What's your name?" The question seemed benign but the girl answered warily, "Spades."

"Spades? That's funny, I don't recall Spades being a name." George raised an eyebrow, implying she was to tell her real name, not an alias.

" The Ace of Spades. I've gone by it for the past 10 years. But if you must know my real name- "

" And I must,"

"Then it's Audrelinia. But I prefer Spades. Or Audrie, in the very least." She folded her arms across her chest.

" Lady Audrelinia. That has a lovely ring to it." George grinned. "Men, I do believe we've found our way in."